#hamcast

[patented-garbage]

SEINFELD HAMCAST

Jerry Seinfeld:

Elaine Benes:

George Costanza:

Cosmo Kramer:

[neotokyorider]

Gale and Astarion both give you this puppy-eye'd look sometimes and I am so susceptible to that. They provoke a response from me that like an actual human being would? And I rarely get that with games-even amazing ones.

I just love this game. The amazing characters, the ability to play with friends and Matty, and the pure chaos I can inflict on this world makes me so happy. Thanks to Axl, Matty, and Aryn for sharing the game early on and getting me interested

[crystallinediamonds]

Pippa for Vogue Magazine

[epcot-anthony]

For Forever

word count: 3,007 PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave feedback!! i really love this fic and i would be really sad if it didn't get love or feedback!!! —————————————————————— They broke up. There were many others ways to put it, splitting up, ending things or entering a new chapter of their lives; but the most simple way to put it was that they broke up. Breakups are categorized, they always are. There's the bad breakups that ruin you and kill you inside, then there's the mutual breakups that hurt the both of you but it slowly gets better, there's the messy breakups that usually end in the most dramatic fight, and then there's the way Jasmine and Anthony broke up. Sudden, that's what it was. Everything was good, great even before it all crashed done. Months before their actual fall, Jasmine was acting off. The older girl was shaky, nervous, panicky and all the other words for a complete wreck. One day when her and Anthony were sitting on the couch watching some Netflix documentary, she brought the three simple words that had the ability to ruin a person mentally and emotionally. "Can we talk?" Jasmine's voice was shaky, her nerves building up even more when Anthony turned his head to face her and uttered a simple, "Sure," all nonchalant-like. But to Jasmine the word had more meaning as she processed it seconds after he said it. It was a simple word, but it was venomous. The word seemed like it held all the evil in the world inside it and that killed her. But she continued on like normal, and told him that things between them felt different and Anthony just asked her to explain. The thing about his tone of voice that killed her inside was how calm he sounded. He sounded like nothing was wrong, not like their relationship was becoming more rockier by the second or anything. Oh the inside she knew he was cracking, that the solid and calm facade he was showing her was nothing but a mere image of how he wanted to be thinking, but he wasn't. The night progressed on and tears ensued but they weren't broken up, they weren't broken up just yet, that would come soon enough too. Jasmine split into the guest bedroom and Anthony took their bedroom. She wanted to sleep, she really did but she couldn't, the hamster wheel of thought kept moving along, thinking of more ridiculous theories by the second. Jasmine only got two hours of sleep before her body woke herself up again. They struggled along for another month before everything, every single thing, came crashing down on top of the couple. It started with a fight, a small fight over who's house they would be at for the next holiday but then it maneuvered itself into a huge fight, words the two would soon regret being yelled back and forth with no regret at that current time. "You know what? I cant do this anymore!" Those were the words Jasmine yelled that silenced the room that was filled with yelling and slight movement as they shuffled back and forth, their hands moving with them as they yelled. She saw Anthony go blank. Well, he went blank in his physical reaction but she knew on the inside everything in his brain was moving too fast. Like the hamster wheel in her brain, except it was moving too damn fast and if any hamster was on it they so would've fallen off it by now. When Anthony finally spoke his voice was shaky, his voice was broken and slow. His physical state changed as his shoulders slumped and his eyes grew sad. But Anthony's words, his words were simple, they always were when he was dying on the inside, or wanting to die on the inside. All he could choke out was a shaky, "Okay," then his gaze shifted downwards and onto the floor as he tried to compose himself and not break down in front of the girl he was hopelessly in love with and knew he would never stop loving. Soon later Jasmine got most of her stuff together and threw it into one of the boxes she found in the guest bedroom closet from when Anthony was just moving into his apartment about a year ago. She packed up her clothes, not including his flannel or his sweaters this time. The older girl broke as she looked around at the now practically empty, well empty in her mind, apartment. She didn't even say her goodbyes before she disappeared back into the crowded New York City streets. They both took the breakup hard, and by doing that they somehow managed to isolate themselves from all family and friends. None of their family even knew they had split—, broken up, and for now they wanted to keep it that way. But with all the distress and pain they were currently feelings, they managed to forget that Anthony's sisters birthday was in three days, which would be about five days after their breakup. It's not like one of them could miss the party, it was Anthony's little sister and practically Jasmine's little sister as well. Anthony's doorbell rang at only ten in the morning and he would be lying if he said it didn't piss him off. He was going to take the method of not answering but the asshole—whoever they were, kept ringing it. So he groaned and got out of bed, not even bothering to pull a shirt on when he dragged himself to the door and opened it. Seeing each other again was weird. It had only been days but in their minds, they both looked and seemed so different. Jasmine was a mess, a mess trying to get her shit together. Her curls were put up into a messy bun but an actual messy one, small pieces of hair flying out in the back and little bumps at the top. Jas hadn't worn makeup since the day everything crashed down as she was too worried. Anthony wasn't doing the best either. Though his physical appearance wasn't a dead give away of how he was currently filming, he didn't look all that great either. His curls were knotted and messy, pulled up in a pony tail, something he probably did days ago and would hurt like hell to even attempt to take it out. But his eyes were droopy and sad, the bags under them more obvious than they ever were before. Though he wasn't currently wearing a shirt, the one recently thrown on his floor from the night before, was the one Jasmine always wore, a red flannel. Yeah, he may sound creepy but wearing it made him feel better, Jasmine had only worn it two weeks ago and it still smelled like her, a scent of welcoming and warmness. The only thing he could relate it to was maybe the smell and feeling of warm sheets when they came out of the dryer. After the ex's sat in the most uncomfortable silence of just taking each other's features in, Jasmine knew she had to speak up. But she wasn't about to talk about this in the hallway of his apartment and potentially get into an argument with him where all the neighbors could watch. So she brushed past him and walked into his apartment, not caring about how taken aback he probably looked right now. "I don't want to be here more than you want me here, but your little sisters birthday is in a few days and I promised her I'm going to that party and you better be going as well," Jasmine knew her tone was sharp and stern but she didn't even mind it, "We also won't be ruining her birthday so we're going to act like a couple again and a damn good couple," Jasmine finished off with a sigh. Anthony just stared at her as he tried to process all of this. First, his ex shows up at his apartment unannounced and now they're stuck acting like they aren't going through hell right now and act all cute and cuddly. Anthony would never admit that he missed being able to hold Jasmine at night, but he truly did miss her curling up against him as he hold her close and kissed her forehead. "Hello? Did you die?" Jasmine questioned once she noticed Anthony just staring at her. She knew it was a blunt and probably rude question, but she was so damn stressed right now so that was one of the least of her worries. Anthony quickly snapped out of it as a blush spread across his cheeks, "Sorry," He ignored the sarcastic response he heard his ex girlfriend mutter, "What the hell are we supposed to do?" He questioned even though he knew the answer to it already. Jasmine couldn't even help herself but groaning and rolling her eyes before she answered his question, "Well we're going to just tell your baby sister who lovessss us together that we broke up, just break her heart on her birthday!" Jasmine over exaggerated and dragged out her words in an unnecessary way, "Of course not you idiot! We're going to act like we're still happily in love and then we can tell everyone a few days later. Just make up some lie and tell them we had a falling out," Jasmine explained her plan. Anthony slowly nodded as he thought about it and then knew this was going to have to happen, that even if it hurt more than a lot of things they would have to do this for not themselves, but for his sister. After that Jasmine made a comment about how messy his apartment was before she stood up and grabbed her phone and wakes out of his apartment without saying her goodbyes. Though she did send a text an hour later that explained that on the day of the party Anthony could come by her place to pick her up an hour before the party was planning on starting. Then the days passed and it was Anthony's younger sister, Stephanie's birthday. Jasmine was back at her apartment as she went through her dresses, struggling on picking the best one for this occasion and moment in her life. This was probably as stressful as when she met Anthony's family for the first time, but she tried not to think of that because old memories brought old thoughts and old thoughts weren't good for her. In the end, she voted on a dark, maroon colored dress that hugged her curves in all the right ways. It was mid-thigh length and long sleeves. Anthony was struggling as well as he looked through his closet to pick an outfit. He was never good at this stuff. Every single time he was stuck at some formal event Jasmine was always behind the scenes with him helping him pick out the best outfit for the occasion. But now he didn't have that advantage. In the end he voted on a grey blazer, one of the only blazers he owned, a white shirt and some black skinny jeans. At 6 he showed up at Jasmine's, shooting her a quick text saying he was there as he waited in the car. Jasmine hated the whole knocking on the door type of thing when they were just going to walk back out to the car. And honestly, it was a pretty valid reason. Two minutes later Jasmine walked out to the car, her now newly cut short hair down as she gripped her purse and phone. To Anthony, and anyone really, she looked stunning. The dress complimented her body in some of the best ways possible and that hair, oh Anthony loved that hair style on her, he thought she looked hot with it. The car ride to his sisters place was filled with silence, well the silence besides the radio quietly humming as Jasmine muttered the words along with the nearly muted radio. Singing, or singing in a way, was a good way to relive stress or nerves for her. As the arrived to the house and got out of the car, Jasmine knew she had to relive her old habits. She walked over to Anthony and wrapped her arms around him, something that sent chills down his spine at first, but to be honest he truly did miss that feeling that Jasmine never failed to give him. So he did what he always did as well and pulled her closer, loosely wrapping an arm around her as they walked up to the door. Anthony's mom answered the door with a smile on her face as she hugged her two 'babies', as she called them, and kissed their cheeks before letting them go into the living room to chat with Anthony's friends and family. The whole night felt weird for Jasmine and Anthony as she was forced to be pressed up against him most of the night, and if she wasn't she was probably talking to one of his aunts about her relationship with their nephew, forced to say positive things and even bring up things like marriage and a child in the future. It was getting late and Jasmine went to look for Anthony so they could get ready to leave, but she couldn't find him. So she went around and asked a majority of his family if they'd seen him but of course everyone had to say they hadn't. Then she eyed the little balcony Stephanie's place had. Jasmine and Anthony said 'I love you' for the first time on that balcony. So Jasmine walked out, not too surprised to see her ex boyfriend there, him jumping a little when he heard the door open. "Why are you out here?" Jasmine questioned as she went to stand next to him, looking over the bright lights and tall buildings that flooded the 'never-sleeping' streets of New York City, her favorite place in the world, besides Anthony's arms. Anthony only sighed at first as his response, just looking down before he could speak up, "Tonight hurt a lot. It made me feel so many emotions that I didn't think I would ever fee again. Every time you would kiss my cheek or hold me close it reminded me of the first time and all those sparks flew just like they did that time. It hurts Jas. It hurts knowing how much I love you and that I'll probably never stop loving you, but I cant have you because when can I ever have good things?" Anthony ranted off, stunning Jasmine to almost silence. It took her a few moments before she could even respond but when she did, she knew it would be nothing to close as how brilliantly Anthony's words flowed out, like some painful and heartbreaking poet. "I felt them too," Jasmine's voice dropped to almost a whisper as she took a deep breathe, "I felt those sparks that I felt when we first touched, or when you first flirted with me. I felt those butterflies that I felt when you flirted with me on the first day of rehearsals, when I was just some random new girl to you. I miss you. I haven't been able to sleep good since we ended everything. Cuddling pillows isn't as great as hugging a real person," Jasmine confessed to her ex boyfriend. The two sat in almost a comfortable silence as they both stared down onto the city, the sounds of sirens becoming normal to them now. They fell in love in this city, they were still in love in the city they also loved. "Jazzy? I know this is, this is really daring of me," Anthony let out a laugh as he took another deep breathe, "But do you think we should you know, try this again? Try us again?" He asked, "I know it didn't work at first but I really have faith in us baby girl. What we had was too amazing and special to just loose that fast. Give me another chance, give us another chance," Jasmine sharply took in a breathe before she quietly began to laugh, automatically causing Anthony's mind to race wild with possibilities on what the hell that even meant. "Of course I want to try again! I've wanted to try again since the day we ended this. I've missed you so much Ant. I would love nothing more in thi—" But she was cut off by Anthony's lips being pressed against hers. Jasmine smiled into the kiss as she felt herself wrap her arms around the love of her life's neck, his hands finding her waist. Soon after the kiss had broken, the couple decided that this was what they wanted. They wanted each other and that's all. Now they had each other again, and everything was gonna be alright. Now they just stood together, hand in hand as they looked down on the city they loved. This is all they needed, each other. So they exchanged simple words and phrases as they took in the view. If this is what their life would be like forever, they so weren't complaining.

[crystallinediamonds]

Daveed photographed By Meredith Jenks

[crystallinediamonds]

Daveed photographed By Meredith Jenks

[neotokyorider]

I don't know if I could ever convey just how much my friends mean to me. It's going to sound super dramatic but I mean this sincerely, they saved my life. They are my family and fill me with so much hope. Any time I've felt lost...they and Matty have found me and took my hand and led me back to warm and light place. They've drawn laughter from me on my worst days. Laughter I had no idea even existed.

I would not be here if not for them and I'm so thankful I am.

So if one of you is reading this: thank you and I apologize in advance that I will cry when I first see you.

Just know you're everything to me.

[wewillbehappyagain]