Is that not exactly what he wants? To forget? Comply? Forfeit our greatest weapon? Sir. These contestants, and Toilet, have always had your back. If we work together, trust each other, it will be our best chance of surviv-
My thoughts about Taco and Mic on episode 14 copied and pasted from discord:
(Autism warning undercut)
''this episode is very important for both taco and mic, and especially mic. So, like I have told you already, mic is a complicated one. Knife goes right to her, and in his own words is in a 'generous mood' and so he tells her to well, stop. To in his on words ''have some dignity'' mic simply says that her and taco are equals, she has a voice, no one is shutting her down and she isn't just being dragged along by her. Which, is true. However, knife simply says ''well...I guess you are pretty in synch'' leaving her, confused. Mic is someone that dwells on things I'd like to believe, and so knife's words very clearly get right through her. We have established since the start that mic is at her core really insecure, I didn't told you this but the moment she got the praise, approval and attention she wanted from her team thanks to taco- she was smug about it, had no problem with saying weird stuff about her teammates in order to make herself look better- her confidence skyrocket tremendously and for the first time she seemed to hold herself in a better regard than when she did back then, but in episode 14 there is absolutely none of that, mic's confidence has been completely shattered, test tube is angry at her for stealing her stuff (understandably so) and clearly doesn't trust her for her annoyance, her body language is awkward small, and maybe that's because this is how she feels, I believe test tube's anger and distrust of her was probably some blow to her ego and the way she viewed herself. Overall she is just, pretty exhausted in this episode and this time is easier for knife's words to get through her because of that, she is tired, and worried and even though she wants to believe taco- even though she has learnt to see a new side of taco, people often forget that she still didn't fully know her despite this. She knew now that taco does hide big feelings from her, she supresses them since they are clearly a sour subject for her, and so mic doesn't bring up the portal again. But now that they are here, and knife's words get through she feels above all- insecure. Even despite this her vision is clouded by her exhaustion and doubts she is scared, scared that knife is right, that she truly doesn't mean anything to her that she truly is dragging her along- that despite everything they went through together, she doesn't really see her as her friend.
And so, just like episode 12 she goes to taco, for reassurance, she asks her to please not use violence when they go to get fan, she wants her to promise her not to. She is insecure and scare and doubtful and so she goes to taco and hopes that she does something that proves knife wrong. Taco, gently puts away her hand, tells her that ''teamwork prevailed'' and wished to not promised anything because she wasn't sure if she could. They both smile, and get to the spaceship and it happens. She shoots fan and test tube- mic startled and enraged jumps in the way of taco's guns knowing that she wouldn't hurt her, the latter's gun faltering for just a moment and lowering down. When mic yells at her saying this wasn't part of the plan taco says back to her that aliens rarely are part of the plan and so she sends her to grab fan's body and go back into the competition grounds and she does
everyone is cheering, happy, except test tube of course. Is an scenario that mic dreamed about, dreamed to have, but never through these circumstances. She looks at the crowd with horrified eyes as taco's voice chimes in ''See? this is why you listen to me mic, delectable isn't it? finally...a taste of recognition finally I can finally-'' she cuts her off with a ''is that what you said to pickle?''
yeah this is not truly what she wanted was she? she yearned for approval? yes, for praise? of course. But she never truly wanted to hurt people- kill people to be more exact. It will surprise you the amount of people who don't truly dissect this scene on mic's part. Mic doesn't view herself in a good light, she never truly did, the perception she has of herself alongside her self-esteem is heavily dictated by what others think of her. And right now mic feels miserable, her confidence had already been shattered but in these moments what she thought of herself what she thought of taco the little good redeeming qualities she thought of herself to have are completely gone they have burnt away to a crisp. Her core belief is, doing things because they are the right thing to do. But in these moments- even though she wasn't the one to shoot test tube, to shoot fan, she still allowed it to happen, she truly didn't do ''the right thing to do'' this time around did she? test tube was right, she is a fraud, she is untrustworthy- and in her eyes she is horrible. Episode 14 hurts a lot from her perspective because not only she felt betrayed by someone she loved the self-esteem she managed to somehow ''fix'' for at least a little while has been dragged through the mud and right now, mic is small, and mic is useless and mic is someone that she herself is unable to be proud of.
I thought the reason she even cut off taco in the first place was mainly because of what knife told her. Again she was doubtful and insecure and was afraid that maybe he was right, her brain tormenting her with all those ''what if's'' of her situation, and so she went to taco looking for reassurance, reassurance that she would actually listen, reassurance that she actually values her. But to her this moment was the last straw, to her this was the confirmation that taco really didn't cared enough, that didn't saw her as a friend, that taco truly was dragging her along, as viewers we come to understanding- or well most people come to the understanding that this is really not true, mic is taco's entire world, I didn't mention it here but it was confirmed in a stream that she did all of these stuff out of fear, she feared microphone was doing all the work in the alliance and she wanted to prove herself to her, she wanted to show her she was useful- and its very coincidental that all of this happened the exact moment when I believe taco began seeing mic as a true actual genuine friend. She didn't only wanted to prove herself to her she wanted to show her that she was reliable, that her ideas worked, and that microphone could rely on her because she was her friend but of course, mic didn't know that, and there wasn't really a way for her to know that. She only scratched the surface with taco, she only truly knew so much of her because taco has a knack for hiding herself behind walls to prevent anyone to truly see her for who she really is, she tries to make herself look as an imposing and mighty villain but the truth is that is not really her, she is acting- that is another facade she truly is small and to an extend, scared- and most importantly, alone. It's understandable that mic didn't know what as an audience we know, and even then a lot of people fell through the misconception that she did so it really shows how hard taco herself can be to read sometimes, if even the people who are meant to dismantle her facade are falling for it. And so I believe that had knife not told her that she probably would have given taco an earful, but mic was tired in this and mic was scared and doubtful and not in a good place and so she weaponizes- her past relationship with people against her to hit a nerve, when she is hurt she hurts the other person twice as hard as shown in the same show with cheesy. Just like taco relapsed and fell back into old habits mic also relapsed and fell back into old habits she tried to leave behind because she was exhausted. My friend told me it really felt almost as if she was splitting on her and yeah I can see it, I feel if her mind was clearer in the moment she wouldn't have cut her off like she did maybe distance herself but not cut her off, but because she was tired and rightfully hurt, she just hurt the person she is cannonically the closest to, and makes the choice to leave the show behind. She looks 'relieved' but, I know that the moment she went through the elimination portal and got to the hotel, she broke down days later. I know because sometimes I say or do things that hurt other people when I perceive they hurt me and I regret it later and I feel she probably felt guilty afterwards. But that is so much about mic, what about taco? well
Taco has been lonely, for most of her life. She is hurt- and bitter and yet she regrets with all her soul what she has done. Her core trait is her guilt.
what can I say about taco in this scene? I talked to you about her motivations already, why she did what she did, the way she hides herself behind walls the way she avoids vulnerability almost as if it was poisonous venom to her. More than anyone she hates vulnerability, she does not enjoy looking weak, she does not like when people try to pry into her true feelings and its something that shines a lot in the episode next to this one, she answers to any attempt of trying to crack her open with either dismissal or anger. She does not like, being seen as who she is. Someone small, who needs help. This moment is the moment taco begins to be at her absolute lowest, I will remind you taco at her very core is lonely and she has been lonely for a VERY long time, microphone is the first one to truly see her- 'true self' and still want to remain by her side anyways, and defend her and she enjoyed her company she enjoyed being close to her she enjoyed being by her side as well and she truly held her in a high regard compared to other people, for then this same first genuine friend fading away into the distance right in front of her very own eyes, and so she is left destroyed and hurt and lonely and she doesn't know what to do with herself anymore. Taco's determination that is seen multiple times throughout the series was her downfall it backfired on her. Relentlessly sending letters to pickle in attempts to fix things with him for two years? had the complete opposite effect and it just didn't allowed pickle to properly move on from her and it ended up making him more resentful of her than she already was. Trying to meddle with the competition so she could get some of what she felt was stolen from her no matter the cost? completely destroyed her mental health and made her dig herself into a hole far deeper than before- so deep, she doesn't feel she can climb out of it. Trying to get mic immunity to not only prove a point but to show her she could rely on her? well...you already know the answer. There is of course SO much more to her than just that without counting episode 15 that is an episode solely focused on her, but this is as far as I'll talk with them because I'd like to get to episode 15 with you someday
right now, taco is hurt, and grieving and so awfully miserable. She has believed herself to be nothing but a villain a wretched creatured undeserving of redemption, and yet despite everything mic stayed, mic loved her and mic valued her. For then her to disappear because of one mistake that cost her everything. She is now truly alone and she is not coping well with it. Once again she just completely lost everything and she is too tired to fight to get it back this time, and so she disappear into the distance and we didn't know anything of her for like at least 4 years.
of course there is SO much more of her than this but, this is how I am going to leave it by now, they are both so tragic because they have cannonically been closer than anyone else in the series, they were both hurting and lonely and relied in each other to make up what the other lacked, taco deep deep down truly just wanted company, and mic just wanted to feel actually valued by someone, it was truly the right person at the most awful wrong time.''
I love Test Tube and her cute, nerdy scientist character who tries to be serious but ends up being dragged into random stuff thanks to usually Fan or Lightbulb, and how Ep. 14 showed her bada*s side and how much she was willing to rescue one of her best friends, even if they didn't end on a happy note last time, (which probably makes it sadder,) and to rescue the egg they were raising, but I HATE how the fandom usually either portrays her as a cold, sadistic scientist who doesn't give a sh*t about her friends, including FAN, or as this girlboss baddie bada*s scientist who is good at everything and is on her way to rescue her UwU weak femboy malewife Fan from everything (literally f*cking Millie and Moxxie) and did I mention she has no flaws she is just so cool? Like, can we BALANCE her dorky side and her bada*s side and keep the evil side to Wattpad AUs? Let her be a girlboss AND girlfailure!
(Also, since Test Tube had her bada*s moments, can Fan have some too? Let my dorky fanboy stand up for himself and tell someone off! Maybe that moment where he rejected Steve Cobs in Theft and Battery and how he immediately leapt in to protect the egg counted, but I wanna see more, like, he just has enough and throws hands at someone over, like, Bot, or something, like, Mama Bear style, PLEASE do not let him become another MOXXIE!)
