#have sadness

[drhalepitt]

“  you don’t have to hide your tears.  let it out.  then we’ll move on,  together.  ”

SHE'S SO TIRED OF CRYING , TIRED OF BEING SAD — and she's so tired of her shoulder hurting . Sometimes she felt older than her age . Now , she had gotten the the phone call that would shift her world yet again . Igraine knew it would be different , she would come back different , and she hated it . The deep seeded fear that by the time she returned back from deployment , her place would be gone here , and she would be forgotten .

❝ I hate crying , ❞ she admitted , her waterline already shiny with unshed tears by the time she looked up at him . ❝ I don't want to go back . I don't know who I'm going to be when I come back — I'm already so tired . I'm afraid the Igraine that comes back is going to ruin everything I've tried so hard to build , ❞ she spits out her own name like bile . Like it's already been decided this new version of her will wreck everything . All of the hard work she's put into undoing how her brain now operates . The friendships and relationships she's brought through with her on the other side .

❝ Life is going to go on here , you're going to go on here , and I'll be stuck watching through a screen . ❞

soft angst pls » @jabbotmd

[bigdlittleibignlittleozzo-moved]

@sassandsnapshots​ sent  🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 for whatever the hell Tony wants to talk about.

“Don’t knead too long,” Tony knocked his shoulder into Andie’s, pulling her arms back so her hands would stop kneading the bread dough he had her working on. “You don’t want it to be too elastic. Now put it in the bowl to rise, with a damp cloth on it, on the stove. Then turn the oven on.”

He grabbed his own bowl of dough and put it on the stove. “You know, Nonna and I used to make bread every Sunday, for all the ladies who Nonna used to live with. We’d bake maybe twenty loaves of bread in one day, then we’d deliver them to the ladies when they got home from church, in the same baskets every week. It was this tradition we had. I tried to keep doing it after Nonna died, but it turns out you have to be able to drive to deliver that much bread.”

He grabbed two glasses and a bottle of wine that he’d left breathing on the counter, pouring the wine for each of them, “It was hard, those first few months after Nonna died, figuring out what I could still do and what I couldn’t. Nonna was such a social person, and she’d been raising me to be the same. It’s why I talk so much. Never met a stranger in my life,” his smile was small, just this side of twisted, “And Nonna used to take me with her everywhere, She said it was better for me to go with her. After she died, that was all I knew. I tried so hard to keep to her schedule. The only things I didn’t do with Nonna, I did with mum, and mum didn’t know how to keep up with Nonna’s schedule.

“It wasn’t mum’s fault, she did her best, but she wasn’t Nonna. She didn’t want to be Nonna. Thursdays and parties were all the time she had for me, and I got that. Hell, mum didn’t even know how to get me to school. But she did her best. I never held that against her. But that six months between losing Nonna and losing mum, it was hard. Then dad sent me away and it was just- it was rough.”

[melodyofasirenarchive]

Nix sat, biting his lip as he looked down at his lap. He was trying everything to keep his composure but it ended up failing as he moved to hide his face in his hands and sob.