Someone drew the stabby trio but IBVS and that was their first mistake
Fanfic time babey :)
IBVS is by @onebizarrekai but I kinda sorta added new characters
(Also, credit to @maagii-chan for making the original post that gave me this idea)
“Daniel! Stop playing with the cats and sweep the floor!”
Daniel barely suppressed an annoyed groan at his managers voice. The bastard kept making him do all the menial tasks instead of just letting him entertain the animals (And himself by association). After briefly considering quitting just to get away from the manager, he remembered that he loves animals and needs money which was enough to make him grab the broom and start working.
“C’mon Kyler,” He muttered, “you better show up soon or I’m gonna’ die of boredom.”
Unfortunately, his friend didn’t have the uncanny ability to appear when mentioned. Well, that wasn’t exactly how it worked but he liked letting people think he could essentially be summoned when someone says his name. In reality, he just had a sort of sixth sense for when (And sometimes where) people said his name. Add to that the fact that he was fast, quiet, and usually unnoticeable, a lot of people thought he was some supernatural entity they could summon by just talking about. It was honestly pretty funny to take advantage of this ‘ability’ and scare the shit out of people, but he didn’t do it too often. He was eventually snapped out of his thoughts by the quiet ringing of a bell.
“Fucking finally.” He mumbled, feeling relief wash over him.
Before he could turn around, he was smacked on the back, causing him to stumble.
“Sup, Dan my man!” A cheery voice began, “I figured I’d stop by and check on ya’.”
Daniel couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth, “Cats are where they always are you idiot.”
The newcomer (Also known as Kyler, one of Daniel’s only friends) grinned, “You know me too well bud.” he then leaned down and whispered, “Wanna go see Hedrix?”
“Of course.” Daniel responded, “Just gotta’ get my manager to get off my case first.”
“Just tell him you’re distracting me so I don’t scare off potential customers again.”
Daniel allowed himself to smile at that, remembering the time Kyler scared off a couple and their kid by telling them gruesome facts about animals. After the kid burst into tears from Kyler telling them about how pigs can eat human bones, the couple left.
Easy to say, Daniel’s manager wasn’t the biggest fan of Kyler after that.
“Alright,” He said, “but don’t mess with the cats or else I’m not gonna’ be able to keep you from getting kicked out again.”
“No promises!” Kyler responded, running over to the cat enclosure with childlike glee.
“Daniel.”
Daniel felt the odd squirming in his gut that usually accompanied his manager talking about him and sighed, “Yeah I know, I’ll get him out of here.”
His manager immediately went back to whatever he was doing on his phone and Daniel started walking towards Kyler.
He grabbed Kyler and pulled him away from the cats, “C’mon nerd, let’s get going.”
Kyler stuck his tongue out at his friend, “Whatever fuzz ball.”
“Furry.”
“Shorty.”
“Bitch.”
“Motherfucker.”
The banter continued until they ran out of insults and just walked down the sidewalk in silence. Not too far away, a hot dog cart was set up with a solitary figure sitting at it. Well, sitting was inaccurate, they were obviously asleep with their head rested on top of their arms.
“He’s gonna’ get robbed one of these days.” Daniel muttered.
“He might as well learn the hard way.” Kyler muttered and grabbed the jar of money stashed under the cart.
“Kyler-” Daniel started.
“Relax short stack,” Kyler responded, “I’m just gonna’ scare him a little bit. Y’know, just some tough love.”
“He’s gonna’ cook you or something.” Daniel said.
“Nah, he loves me too much.” Kyler responded and began to shake the sleeping vendor, “Hey, hey Hedrix. Buddy. Wake up dude.”
Their sleeping friend opened one eye lazily, “Kyler? Daniel? What’s up?”
Daniel felt the familiar warmth that came with Hedrix saying his name but brushed it off, “We wanted to see you. Kyler dragged me away from the store just to see you so you better not tell us to leave.”
Hedrix sat up slowly and stretched, the action accompanied by several joints popping, “Alright then, guess it’s my turn to keep you two out of trouble.”
“Always is!” Kyler said, practically beaming, “Also, where’s your jar?”
Hedrix instantly became more alert, “Wh-” he stuck his hand under the cart and felt around for the jar, “Shit, where’d it go?”
Daniel decided to play along, “I told you someone was gonna rob you one of these times.”
“No I must’ve just misplaced it.” The other muttered, scouring the cart for the jar that held his profits, “Stupid fucking assholes...” he said after not seeing it, a near animalistic growl leaving his throat.
No matter how many times they heard it, that sound always made Daniel and Kyler shudder. Hedrix thought nothing of it though, no matter how many times he was told that it was unnatural.
“Relax dude,” Kyler said, holding out the stolen jar, “I was just messing with you.”
“You bastard...” Hedrix muttered, giving his friend a scathing glare and snatching the jar back.
Daniel shrugged, “Maybe don’t fall asleep with all your money in broad daylight.”
“Yeah yeah whatever.”
“Can I have a hot dog?” Kyler asked, sliding to the front of the cart and leaning on it.
“Me too!” Daniel added.
After regarding them for a moment, the still tired vendor just sighed, “Alright fine, but I want something at least. Giving you guys free food isn’t exactly good for business.”
Kyler slid him a ten dollar bill, “Keep the change hot stuff~” he said with a wink.
Hedrix was unphased, taking the bill without looking up, “Keep flirting with me and you’re not getting what you payed for.”
Kyler frowned, seeming dismayed, before his signature smirk returned, “Ah well, can’t blame me for trying.”
After a minute Hedrix handed them two hot dogs before grabbing a third and sliding off his chair.
Daniel gave him a confused look and he just shrugged, “I’m on my lunch break.” he gestured down the street, “Park?”
“Sure!” Kyler said, “I can tell you about what happened yesterday!”
Daniel gave him a confused look, “What happened yesterday?”
“I’m glad you asked!” He responded, jumping in front of the other two and walking backwards, “First off, my dad finally filled out the paperwork so I’m officially going to Foxfield high. So I go there yesterday to get a feel for the place so I’m not a total stranger and the weirdest shit happens! I walk past this jock looking dude talking to some other jocks and right as I pass him, he just stops talking. Then, out of nowhere, he starts following me.”
Daniel frowned, “Did you do something?”
Kyler looked offended, “What? No! I didn’t do anything!” he received a look from Hedrix and sighed, “I didn’t do anything this time at least.” he waved his hands a bit, “But that’s not the point. So anyways, this guy just started following me for no reason. Obviously, I thought that was kinda’ shady so I tried to lose him. Unfortunately, I’m not magic like Little D over here,” Daniel scowled at the nickname but Kyler just continued, “so jock dude catches up to me and grabs my shoulder. I was honestly this close to just punching the guy so he’d leave me alone but I figured that wouldn’t be a good first impression so I just brushed his hand off and kept walking. THEN this asshole walks right in front of me so I just stop and look at him. He started grilling me about being ‘supernatural’ or some shit so I tried to tell him to fuck off in the kindest way I could.”
“You punched him and ran, didn’t you?” Hedrix deadpanned.
Kyler was silent for a moment before mumbling, “Only a little...”
Daniel started laughing but Hedrix just glared at him, “We’ve talked about this Kyler.”
“Yeah whatever dad.”
“Wait wait wait,” Daniel interrupted, “what did he mean by ‘supernatural’? Like, were you surrounded by ghosts or something?”
Kyler shrugged, “Fuck if I know man. All I know is he deserved what I did and he was probably on something.”
“Weird...” Daniel mumbled.
“I know right?” Kyler continued, “If anything, I’m pretty sure you’re the most supernatural or at least weird.”
“How?”
“You’ve got your weird thing where people talk about you and you just like, appear or some shit. It’s weird.”
Daniel shrugged, “I just get this feeling when people are talking about me so I usually check it out. It’s nothing weird, it’s like that myth that you sneeze when someone talks about you.”
Hedrix gave him an odd look, “That’s... Not exactly normal.”
“You’ve got no room to talk Mr. Bear Growl.” Daniel shot back.
Kyler jumped in, “Alright, your both weird! No need to argue about it.”
“You’re weird too though!” Hedrix pointed out, “You talk about how you hear radio static out of nowhere when there’s literally no reason you would.”
“There’s reason!”
“You heard static in the middle of the fucking woods Kyler.” Daniel deadpanned.
“Fine! We’re all weird!” Kyler responded, “Happy?”
“Quite.” Hedrix said, smirking slightly at the annoyed look on Kyler’s face.
“Oh fuck you.” the other muttered, turning around and kicking at a rock that was in his path.
Eventually, they got to the park. It was mostly empty with only a few people walking their dogs or just hanging out on one of the benches. The three just walked down the path cutting through the park. At that point the sun had begun to sink below the horizon, turning the sky a bright orange and causing the lamps lining the path to light up. None of them minded though, it’s not like they couldn’t handle themselves if needed.
“-so I tell this kid to leave the iguanas alone and when he didn’t, I just told him that they were poisonous and he was probably gonna die soon ‘cuz he touched them.” Daniel said, finishing his story.
Kyler was wheezing with laughter and had to lean on a chuckling Hedrix to stay upright.
“I would’ve killed to see that kids face!” Kyler laughed, wiping a tear from his eye.
Hedrix just shook his head, still smiling, “You two need to quit terrifying kids before you get in trouble.”
“Chillax hotdogs!” Kyler said, leaning up against the other, “We don’t get in trouble, you got no reason to worry!”
Of course, the universe had to prove him wrong.
“HEY! HOODIE GUY!”
Daniel turned to see who was talking, “Me?”
The boy running over just shook his head and pointed at Kyler, “No! That guy!”
“Oh shit-” Kyler muttered, ducking behind Hedrix.
“Who is that?!” Hedrix asked, turning his back to Kyler to face the newcomer.
“That’s the guy I punched at school!” Kyler hissed, holding Hedrix’s arm like a lifeline, “He’s gonna kill me!”
Before the other could respond, the jock reached them, and he didn’t look too pleased.
“I want an explanation you little-” He began but stopped, looking stunned.
The other three shared a look before turning back to their aggressor.
The jock shook his head, now looking surprised, “There are two more?!”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Daniel asked, backing up slightly.
The jock gestured to Hedrix and Daniel, “You two! You’re supernatural too!”
The accused two looked at each other, looked back at the jock, and then burst out laughing.
“What’s so funny?” He demanded.
“Y-you think we-” Hedrix could hardly get anything out through his laughter, “You think WE are supernatural?!” he laughed, “Oh that’s- that’s rich!”
“Buddy,” Daniel said, still snickering, “the most unnatural thing about me is my lack of a growth spurt.”
Before the jock could continue, someone else an up to them.
“Get back here Ed!” They called, still a ways down the path.
The jock, presumably named Ed, just scowled at the three, “I’m not finished with you weirdos.” he glared at them one last time before turning around dramatically and running off towards his friend.
Kyler sighed, “Glad that’s over, I really thought I was in trouble this time.”
“No worries buddy,” Hedrix said, patting him on the back, “just don’t go around punching people next time alright?”
“Whatever.” Kyler muttered.
That was apparently a sufficient answer as Hedrix just smiled, “C’mon guys, let’s head home before Foxfield’s Ghostbuster comes after us again.”
“Amen to that.” Daniel sighed.