#hellsing shitposts

[thehellsingorganization]

Ok you know that Spongebob episode/scene where Spongebob and Patrick are in the Fish Hook Field and Patrick has at least 20 hooks in his mouth saying “does this look dangerous to you”

Now imagine Alucard as Patrick with 50 bayonets in his general head area and Seras as Spongebob

[fallingthruspace]

Alucard: LEAVE ME TO DO MY DARK BIDDING ON THE INTERNET!

Seras: what are you bidding on?

Alucard: I’m bidding on a table.

[maddie-sama]

Holy shit.... I haven't shit posted at all today.

[thehellsingorganization]

Not to be unreasonably obscene but,,,

Can Alucard... take a shit?

[thehellsingorganization]

Hellsing AU where everything’s the same but every time Alucard says “Yes, my Master” he dabs.

Special TM Thanks to @monsterloversanonymous

[thehellsingorganization]

[thehellsingorganization]

Apparently this came out last December and I’m late to the party but I found this:

https://youtu.be/w3j4dUnZzg8

[thehellsingorganization]

I’m not sure how to say it but the idea of Alucard being absolutely inflexible physically in his most human form really

...CRACKS me up

:D

No one asked for it but here’s more if you’d humor me:

Him rolling his neck or ankles around

Him cracking his knuckles (possibly before just right hooking Anderson ohH WAIT THAT DID HAPPEN RIGHT)

Integra: “Careful, you’ll wake up all of London”

Him full-body stretching, leisurely, at all.

Is it necessary? Does it help in any way? Is it healthy for an eldritch metaphysical body??

This probably falls into some pain kink of sorts