#hisartistsmuse

[yourartistsheart-moved]

independent & mutuals only 𝐒𝐀𝐌 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐀𝐇𝐒: 𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐑𝐊 written as original characters by genesis ( @hisartistsmuse ) & cori ( @yourartistsheart )

[yourartistsheart]

@hisartistsmuse asked: could you tell me what you’re afraid of?

the question causes theo to pause, head tilting so that his gaze falls on the older man. it wasn't the first time that someone had asked him that, but it was usually asked out of ignorance from those who didn't fully grasp the power behind those words. in his opinion, the knowledge of one's true fears should be kept a closely guarded secret because telling someone your true fears meant giving them power over you. it wasn't knowledge that should be given out lightly because giving someone power over you shouldn't be something done easily. this was something that theo had learned the hard way early on.

dark eyes regard sam in thoughtful silence as he lets the words settle, letting his mind ponder. sam was different than those who had asked him before. if anyone knew what held power and what didn't, it would be him. that was his whole thing, wasn't it? power over another. it wasn't the physical acts that satisfied sam, but the power he had over another during it. if anyone could see that, it was someone like theo graves.

his lips curl up into a small smile as he finally speaks. "you and i both know that's a dangerous question, sam." he shifts closer to him, getting a bit more into his space and lowering his voice. "i'll tell you one fear. i'll give you that much." a small pause before he speaks again. "i'm scared of you. of us. of this thing that's unfolding between us. it feels like a fire that's spinning out of control and i don't know if both of us are going to come out of the other end of it alive. it feels like the kind of thing that fundamentally changes you forever."

his voice lowers as he speaks, throat tightening slightly as the words wobble. "i'm terrified and yet...i can't stop myself from jumping into the flames headfirst." there it was. a secret, a moment of submission that was far different than before. this was a submission of a more intimate nature, the kind that theo never does. but then again, sam was different.

[laviebhemes]

the bitter winter wind cuts through him, causing the freelance filmmaker to shiver uncontrollably. he tightens his jacket around his thin frame, hunching his shoulders as if he was trying to hide in his thick white and blue scarf. his bag bangs against his thigh and hip as he hurries down the sidewalk, eager to get out of the wind and into the apartment. he wants nothing more than to curl up on the couch with a cup of steaming hot tea and a thick blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

it's with this thought in mind that he scurries into the building and into the elevator, breathing a sigh of relief once inside. his tense frame began to relax slightly as the building's warmth slowly began to press against the little bit of exposed skin on his face and in the small gaps between his gloves and his jacket. as the elevator ticks up to his floor, mark sends up a prayer to any powers that be that sam would be agreeable to mark's desire to simply curl up under the covers and not leave the apartment for the rest of the night.

he steps into the apartment, another wave of relief crashing over him as he crosses the threshold. "sam, i'm home," he calls out, already scurrying to the kitchen to put on the kettle for the tea. he carefully sets his bag with his camera and other items onto the table as he passes it, glancing around for his boyfriend.

@hisartistsmuse gets a surprise starter

[cameraclutched]

@hisartistsmuse asked: [ 𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐃 ] ― sender blindfolds receiver

he's sitting comfortably on the couch, book in hand, when he hears sam bustling around. he doesn't really glance up at first, too immersed in the adventure in his hands to pay much attention to the older man. he was on a two hour screen break period, something that was recently implemented after his brain decided to obsess over t.ikt.ok a little too much. he was trying to get as much out of it as he could, especially given that he was finally on spring break and actually had time to enjoy something that wasn't school related.

he's startled as the blindfold slips over his eyes, a slight squeak of surprise leaving him. the silky fabric is quickly tugged snug around his head, completely blocking out the world around him. he's both intrigued and vaguely irritated at the interruption. "what are you up to, sam?" 

[cameraclutched]

@hisartistsmuse asked: "Who do you think is going to finish the project if you make yourself sick?"

he tries to work within the rules that he and sam agreed upon when they entered this phase of their relationship. he really does. but there are some times, like now, where mark completely slips up and buries himself into a project so deeply that everything else slips his mind. that's what's happening with this ( in mark's mind ) incredibly important project. not only was it worth a huge chunk of his overall grade for this particular class, but it was also being submitted to a contest for both career opportunity and good bit of cash. he needed this.

he has no idea how long sam had been in the room, or how long he'd rambled at the older man or even what was said. his mind was too far away, too focused on the ins and outs of this stupid fucking project. it was consuming every part of him, becoming his entire life. he needed to get this done. he can't fail. and this can't be anything less than perfect. anything less than perfect means failure and he's worked too hard to fail everything now.

something about sam's words bring mark back to the present and he pauses, finally pulling his gaze away from the screen to stare up at the older man. he blinks owlishly a few times as the question hangs in the air between them, slowly becoming aware of all of the complaints from his body. his back and neck are screaming from sitting for so long, his eyes feel irritated and tired from the hours of staring at a screen, and his stomach is growling loudly. he starts to lick his lips and realizes how dry his mouth is. fuck. "i can push..." he pauses, realizing that that may not be the best thing to say in the current situation.

he needs to tread carefully now, a small part of his brain whispers. "no one will," mark amends.

[sexwon]

@hisartistsmuse asked: you deserve a whole lot better, you know.

he hears the words, but his first instinct is to disbelieve them. he lets out a scoffing sound as he shakes his head, jaw tightening as he presses more into the sun warmed wood of the tree that he'd already been sitting against. he feels vulnerable and exposed, causing him to squirm slightly beneath the older man's gaze. he wishes he had something strong to make this conversation far easier to deal with, but he knew it would be useless even if he did have it. booze, drugs, none of that worked anymore when you were as dead as they were. probably another aspect of the hell that they were forever stuck in.

"bullshit," he finally says. "i should have never left that fuckin' hick town in alabama. hell, i should have never kissed the principal's son. everything that's happened since then was because of that." he's unable to meet sam's gaze now, staring off into the trees beyond the man as he draws his knees into his chest. "ma and pa were right about the evils of the world gettin' me. everything that's happened to me was my fault." he doesn't care that the old accent that he's worked so hard at getting rid of slipped through.

he feels colder than the usual ghost way. a kind of cold that went further, down into his very core, and he was unable to stop shaking. he rests his forehead against his knees, eyes closing as he tries to will the intrusive voices of his family out of his mind. "blake should have just left me to die in that park." he grumbles.

[sexwon]

@hisartistsmuse asked: ❝ here, let me hold you. i’ll protect you. ❞

his body tenses automatically at the invitation and his first instinct is to try and push the older man away. his jaw tightens, but then he takes a deep breath and lets it out very, very slowly and he forces himself to relax. sam was different than blake and a lot of the other men in blake's inner circle. he respects boundaries, he listens, he doesn't push. xavier knows that sam has a reputation, but it was nowhere near blake's level of infamous. he can feel himself slowly softening as his guard begins to lower and he nods, swallowing his initial objections. "y-yeah. that...that would be nice, actually." xavier hates admitting how touch starved he is. he'd do anything for anyone if they touched him the right way and he hated that about himself.

[cameraclutched]

@hisartistsmuse asked: did you just say i love you? : ))))))

the words slip out in a moment of weakness, helped along by the edibles he'd consumed earlier in the night. he's warm, curled up in a blanket beside sam with his head comfortably tucked against the older man's shoulder. one of his favorite movies is playing on the television. it's a good night. he remembers thinking the words, but he doesn't realize that his thoughts become verbal until sam points them out. he pales, body stiffening as fear settles over him. "...yeah. i-i guess i did." he wants to apologize, wants to take it back even if taking it back would be a lie, but knows that it'd just make the situation worse. "you don't have to say it back if you don't want to. i'd understand." his voice is small and he's not quite able to look sam in the eye. he's pulling inside of himself, making himself smaller as a part of his mind prepares himself for sam's rejection.