good LORD listen to this fuckin WISDOM that judge Lynn Toler dropped in a divorce court episode after a husband expressed reluctance to forgive his wife because it would (paraphrased) ~go against his code as a man~
"Codes are good. Standards are good. But if you stick with a code simply because it's your code, you never get to level up. If you have that code at seventeen that you learned from your dad, or from the military, or from whatever, what you do at twenty-seven, and what you do at thirty seven, it's all gonna be the same thing. I shudder to think if I still lived by the same code that I had when I was fifty seven, forty seven, thirty seven, twenty seven."
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like she just yanked my crooked-ass head off and stuck it back on straight.