6 weeks after...
To be able to really move on or at least to fulfill that goal of making yourself whole you must do things not to get him back but you really have to focus on trying to make yourself better.
Why?
1. You will look pathetic chasing after him. He will look down on you. The more you do it the worst you'll seem in his eyes.
2. You won't be able to know yourself more. You won't know if there's a part you need to change because you're too busy obssessing about him/her.
3. Doing things for him/her will not make you whole. It will give you a false self. You'll only be repeating the same mistake if you get back together.
But what would you do if you really want him back? I know you can't really force your heart to stop loving someone. You can, instead, use this as an inspiration to really work on yourself first.
The right step to take if you want to use them as your inspiration to change:
Don't think of him/her as the ex who broke your heart...
Think of them as your crush.
Would you want to kill yourself if your crush didn't like you back? NO.
Do you attach negative thoughts when thinking about your crush? NO
Do you become your best self to attract your crush again? YES
If you're a girl and you want your crush to notice you, do you court him yourself or keep texting him to get his attention?
YOU SHOULDN'T.
Treat him/her as your crush. Lessen the obssessive thoughts. Make yourself better so that you can be worthy of their attention. (NOT THAT YOU WEREN'T WORTHY BUT SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED ALONG THE WAY AND IT COULD BE YOU WHO LOST YOURSELF, LIKE ME. SO I HAVE TO BE A WHOLE PERSON WHO'S TOTALLY CAPABLE OF BEING HAPPY AND SELF SUFFICIENT WITHOUT ANOTHER PERSON BEFORE GETTING BACK OR INTO ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP)
No matter what happens after, even if they don't come back,
you would have already blossomed into the best version of yourself. Others will see it and might pursue you and will make you happier than your last relationship and even without that you would totally be happy by yourself, anyway.
-cat
