i was bored at work and was thinking about what if the hypmic characters were clients of mine. and then it spiraled out of control a lil
source: dude trust me i went to hair school
buster bros!!!
ichiro is a perfect angel client who tips so much, he knows how much work goes into being a stylist and he also knows what it can be like out there working for yourself. he does just the right amount of talking and it feels so natural with him. his hair is so fucking thick and difficult to cut tho so rip in shit whoever is cutting his hair
jiro. stinky. same hair as ichiro just so much greasier, you need to shampoo him like three times. he’s fun to talk to but he Will talk about sports and ichiro the whole time. the stylist ends up with so many hair splinters bc of these boys i stg
saburo is quiet in the chair until you get him talking about something he really likes. ask him about what he’s doing on the computer and you might get a few words out of him. same hair as his brothers but he actually has a good wash routine so he doesn't smell like shit
mtc
samatoki has a borderline religious schedule with his haircuts and tips like a stupid high amount. like comes in every four weeks or some shit. he finds a barber he likes and sticks with them until they retire or die, but it takes forever for him to find someone of his standards. his hair is on the finer side but there’s so fucking much of it
jyuto is also pretty on top of getting his hair cut, but isn’t as rigid with the schedule as samatoki, maybe he comes every six weeks. would set up all of his appointments for the entire year as soon as the books open. his hair is very fine, and he has less than samatoki. constantly asks if he’s thinning or losing hair. very concerned about it.
rio has to be dragged to the salon bc he usually does it himself. he doesn't see a point in going. he’s got a pair of battery operated clippers he uses and he’s gotten pretty good with cutting his own hair. he will go with samatoki and jyuto and will get his hair cut if it is offered, but he’s not going on his own. u cannot make him.
bad ass temple
kuko cuts and dyes his own hair. he’s got decently thick hair and its pretty coarse, but not like. the worst you’ve ever seen. somewhat fried due to how often he bleaches it, he's like me in the fact that he sees his roots and immediately gets the bleach out. he will sometimes go to the salon with jyushi and the stylists are like “jfc dude what did you do to your hair” and he goes >:V. his hair seems like a very important part of his self expression to me so he's got a lot of pride in it
jyushi has his highlights done every six weeks on the Dot and has never missed a hair appointment. has an amazing at home routine to make sure his highlights don’t get brassy (please don’t look at his canon art and the fact they’re yellow anime don't know shit about real blonde most of the time.) i think irl jyushi would have more cool toned highlights but that might just be a me thing. very thick hair but it's so soft
hitoya is also anal about his hair routine and cuts. every six weeks ON THE FUCKING DOT. missed an appointment one time and almost lost his mind. it was a disaster. very picky and will take the comb out of the hairdressers hands (actual thing someone has done to me) to do it his way. has gotten kicked out of the salon for that. i don't think he colors his hair, i think that's his natural color. very thick and coarse hair but he uses a lot of conditioning masks on it.
dotsuhon
sasara. another religious one bc of his tv appearances, goes every four weeks and is a riot in the salon. thinner hair and v fine, decent amount of it. if it’s a private suite and he’s been seeing the person long enough, they know a bit about rosho before the two reunite bc who tf else is sasara going to talk to about that? but only if it's a private suite and he trusts the person. very unlikely to happen. but it could. i genuinely cannot make up my mind on if he dyes his hair or if it's just like that. (i dye my hair like sasara's and know first hand what a nightmare it is so i can fully see him just doing that to someone LMAO)
rosho…. goes very irregularly. he’s another thick hair person, and i like to think he has grey in his hair bc of stress (and bc it’s hot) and he’s a decent tipper. very nervous in the chair tho, esp at the beginning of seeing a stylist. he's another one that gives me vibes of "finds one hairdresser he likes and follows them everywhere," just less intense than samatoki.
rei is another ridiculous tipper. his hair is stupid thick like the buster bros (they get it from him) and it’s decently curly. he comes in on a semi regular schedule and always schedules like. day of. last second. he basically gives you two seconds of warning and then boom expensive smelling cologne is in ur salon and the most annoying man you've ever met (/aff)
fling posse
ramuda is somehow the best behaved of fp in the chair. and that’s only bc gentaro and dice are so bad. the three of them always come in together but sometimes you’ll get ramuda on his own. he’s much more chill without his teammates there. another good tipper bc he knows how much effort goes into being a stylist. hair feels like candy floss it's so thin and fine (just like my hair for real)
gentaro is a nightmare. like yeah he tips good so it’s worth cutting his hair but he moves his head when he talks and he NEVER STOPS TALKING. can guarantee he’s gotten his ear nicked by the shears before, probably multiple times. always talking about the most batshit stories and then it’s like “teehee i was lying” dear god. sometimes he goads ramuda into his shennanigans while he's in the chair and the stylist needs to spray them both with a spray bottle. bad and naughty clients get sprayed like cats
dice smells so so bad. i mentioned multiple shampoos for jiro? its double for dice. using like half a liter of shampoo on this freak (/aff). only comes with the rest of fp and is getting egged on by gentaro so he’s another nightmare client. would be so well behaved if he came on his own but he won’t. why would he spend his money on haircuts when he could go gambling? spends gentaro's money to get haircuts every like six months
matenrou
listen i say this as someone with a deeply unhealthy amount of love for the man. i think about blow drying jakurai's hair and i start crying. i can only imagine how bad my back would hurt. also washing his hair is so much. he feels so bad about it every time so he tips like samatoki levels off ridiculous. refuses to cut his hair shorter tho. very polite client and wonderful conversation tho. he’s got finer hair imo which means it tangles so bad so rip in shit to whoever has to deal with him
hifumi is another strict schedule but he kinda has to for his job. hair texture is like,,, it’s a happy medium between fine and coarse. very soft. he will actually use whatever product is recommended to him. every other appointment he comes in doppo is with him. will talk your ear off tho and god forbid his stylist is a woman
doppo has to be guilt tripped into getting a haircut by hifumi and they have to lie to him about how much the haircut costs in order to get him to agree to do it bc otherwise he's gonna start spiraling abt the cost. would go to a japanese great clips equivalent if left to his own devices. only has nice products bc hifumi gets them for him. uses them maybe half the time. would use a 32 in 1 as much as it hurts me to say
chuohku
otome goes to the salon every eight weeks bc that’s all she has time for but she still wants to maintain her style. when her bangs get in her eyes they drive her fucking crazy. she and dice both have very thick hair and a lot of it. another one that makes me cry if i think too hard about blow drying it
ichijiku goes to the salon more frequently than otome but not by much. i think her hair is pretty fine but there’s a metric shit ton of it. gets greasy faster bc of that which is why she has it up most of the time. dry shampoo addict. (i say as one)
nemu would go to the salon every day if she could i think. very particular about her hair and is besties with her stylist. seems like the type to ask her stylist what kind of iced coffee/other drink they want and won't take "i don't want anything" for an answer. u Will be getting a tasty little drink. will make you recut it if she thinks it’s uneven (i have several clients like this.)
