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Y/n is Harry's Boundaries & Harry is Y/n's Desires

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"I'm tired" His voice was muffled as he buried his face in her throat. Body wrapped around her like a vine, she was overheating in more ways than one but she couldn't tell him to move. She wanted him close enough that she could continue to feel his heartbeat. Arms that strong should feel suffocating with how he wound them around her body and kept her to his chest, but she would happily drown in him if it meant keeping him right in this place.

He was just better at speaking those desires out loud.

"I just want you to be with me all the time. As much as I love coming home to you...I don't want to have to keep leaving you behind. Is that too clingy of me to say?"

or

Yn is Harry's Boundaries and Harry is Y/n's Desires

(19K+ words)

Authors Note: Massive, massive thank you to @jarofstyles for including me in the #jarofstylesficchallenge !!! Had an absolute blast writing this and cannot wait for the next challenge! If readers are looking for new content, follow along with the #jarofstylesficchallenge Hope you enjoy, would love to hear what everyone thinks! <3

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Y/n was a hermit.

She would choose anything over a crowded party with sweaty bodies pressed together. She wouldn't even hesitate if she was presented with the option of staying home or going to a party with Niall. She loved Niall to pieces, but going to parties was so stressful for her. If she wanted to get hammered, she would rather it be at her flat with her best mates. Or even at her favorite pub that not many people knew about. Y/n enjoyed those nights in, much better than any of the parties Niall had dragged her to.

And over the years, Niall had dragged her to far too many parties. On special occasions, she would accompany Niall without too much thought. Like for his birthday or if they both had a particularly rough week and Niall promised her a burrito and back rub at the end of the night. Both things she deemed worthy of stressing over for a few hours while Niall loosened up with a few drinks and mindless chatter with his mates.

Most of the time, she would find someplace quiet- or quieter than right beside a speaker- and would sit and keep to herself till Niall had messaged her, he was ready to head out.

Tonight was no different.

She sat underneath the familiar weeping willow tree. The party was at the old campsite that college students took over a couple years back. Generally, the parties were held out here. It was secluded enough so people wouldn't call the police because of the loud music, but it wasn't in the middle of the forest where people felt like a serial killer was around the corner. The paths were cleared and the fire pits were still here for the parties after winter exams.

Y/n enjoyed the parties here more than the parties held at the frat or sorority houses close to campus. Those were much too crowded and by the end of the night, she smelled of liquor and sweat. And with the campsite, she had a tree she would sneak off to and just sit while scrolling through her phone, or sometimes Rhett would accompany her if he hit his quota for the night. Once in a blue moon, she would sneak a drink or two for herself, and enjoy the way her phone light would illuminate the branches of the weeping willow. This would make her wait go a lot faster, but tonight was not one of those nights.

Niall had coaxed her into coming out with him. She didn't give in right away. Instead, she reminded him how piss drunk he was last time and how his aim suffered- and because of it- she had to buy a new bath rug. And also warned him, she didn't grocery shop so his late night munchies wouldn't be satisfied if he crashed at her place. Although she was still dragged from her flat, she noticed the internal battle Niall was having and took note of that for next time this happened.

Because it was bound to happen again.

She had only been sitting for an hour and she swore it felt like three hours had passed. Her skin was covered in goosebumps and her tummy grumbled. Despite warning Niall she had no groceries, this also meant she still hadn't eaten since breakfas. She wished she was cuddled into the oversized blanket on her bed, a large stuffed burrito in her hand, and her lazy fur ball warming the bends of her legs.

Instead, her bum was numb and cold from the roots peeking out of the dirt. Her phone was dying slowly from her phone light illuminating the branches consuming her. And her mind played with all sorts of numbers to help justify her burrito cravings. All justification was thrown out the window when her stomach roared to life and she was determined to stop at a drive through before driving her and Niall home.

Y/n always felt guilty spending on fast food, especially with how often she does it, but she's always exhausted at the end of the day. Cooking is another chore to her and her muddled brain always gives in for something quick and already made.

Her inner battle consumed her thoughts, she hadn't heard the crunching of the leaves till she noticed a shadow entering the weeping willow's branches. She hadn't meant to jump as hard as she did, but this wasn't an area many drunk students stumble too. Throughout her time hiding out here over the years, she had never had someone approach her tree. Y/n almost felt territorial over her little area.

Which was just beyond silly.

"If 'ya got 't wee, I suggest finding a different tree," She spoke from her little spot against the large trunk of the tree. "This ones taken" Y/n's announcement startled the shadow as he walks closer to her.

Luckily the light lit his features as much as it possibly could. His button nose was bitten red and his lips matched the rosy splotches of his cheeks. His lips seemed a little irritated from the cold or possibly his front teeth dragging against his bottom plushy lip. From here, Y/n could see his wild, vivid, green eyes which pulled heat to the tips of her ears when paired with his fluffy brown curls peeking from his skewed beanie.

Y/n couldn't remember the last time the tips of her ears burned just at the sight of someone attractive. Which only made her flush even more as they continued to look at one another.

When Harry had stumbled his way over to this tree, he was convinced he'd either be the only one near this area or he'd find a couple nuzzled up in privacy. Despite neither happening, he's glad he found her. Even if he didn't know who 'her' was.

"'M sorry...didn't think anyone would be over here," Harry softly rambles. Within seconds, Y/n could tell he was a bit drunk. The soft slur in his voice, how he shifted side to side on his feet, and his eyes became a bit hooded the closer he got to her phone light. "But I don't have 't wee...definitely wouldn't wee on 'ya tree either. Think that would be a bit rude" He continued.

Despite being slightly pouty, Y/n felt the tiniest tug at the corner of her lips. Before she could form a response, he plopped down on his bum in front of her. His eyes blinked owlishly at her like he was waiting for her to say something. "What's made you wonder all the way over here? Usually, nobody stumbles in this direction" She questions with a limp shrug.

It took a second or two for Harry to formulate an answer. His eyes were too busy wondering over her features. She was clearly tired, he could see her blinks getting slower, but she also seemed so cuddly with her knitted, beige, oversized crewneck. The sleeves seemed to swallow her hands and if she had pushed her knees to her chest, there would be enough room for her crewneck to hug them. Her hair seemed so soft and shined brightly under the dim light. Perhaps Harry had drank a bit more than he thought because he was itching just to touch the material of her sweater and run his fingertips in her hair.

"Need'a minute to clear me thoughts," He murmured. It felt like he was still swimming in his observation but the way the cold air nipped at his skin helped ground him. "Gets hard 't think straight wit' all 'em people. 'N 'm a shit drinker, can't keep up wit' the rest of 'em" Harry admits with words slurring together.

Her lips tugged at his confession but the wind had picked up. A strong shiver shook her bones and she would give anything to be tucked away in her blankets, a crime show playing, while she balances on the edge of reality.

"Do look a bit starry in the eyes," She teases with a little tilt of her head. "If 'ya a shit drinker, why're you drinking" Y/n asks just to hear him ramble again.

Harry grumbles softly like he was giving her a soft whine. "Always underestimate how much I can drink," He mumbles. "Never feel like 'm drunk and everyone says 'm not drunk, so I get handed another drink. 'N I don't want to hurt their feelings, so I always drink it. But then I feel it all in me head" Harry explains, his chin resting in his palm and lips in a big wetted pout.

"Don't be lettin' 'em peer pressure 'ya into anythin' 'ya don't want 't do," Y/n responded with a bit of a pout. Although she despised when her friends would pressure her into something she didn't want to do, she made sure her voice was stern but not too stern to scare him off. Said peer pressure had made her a natural at this. "So 'ya just came to hide out here?" She questions.

Though his chin was still resting on his palm, he nodded slowly. Before he could speak, his mouth opened in a large yawn. "Bit knackered," He murmurs. "Been up since 6 this mornin'....wit' lectures 'n all that. Then Angela from economics asked if I was going to the party t'night... didn't really want to but it sounded like she wanted me here" Harry rambles with his blinks getting slower and words coming out sluggishly.

Watching him almost curl up in himself got Y/n a bit sleepy herself. More sleepy than she originally was. "Oh yeah? Where's Angela now?" Y/n asks after shooting a message to Niall that she was leaving in the next five minutes with or without him.

(She would never leave him, but if she didn't threaten it then Niall would wonder his way over in the next hour and half...like he'd done previously)

Harry shrugs with his shoulders nearly touching his ear. "Dunno, she said hi to me at the beginning but when I declined her offer for a 'little walk', I didn't see her much after that" He explained.

Y/n hadn't meant to snort out her laughter, but she wasn't expecting that. She didn't know what to expect, but it certainly wasn't that. "Sorry," She apologized with a shy smile. "Why did 'ya decline her offer? Scared of wondering into the woods?" She had asked to help reestablish the flow of his rambling.

A drunken grin spread on Harry lips. "No, but I dunno...just didn't see her like that...guess it would've been a nice moment 't get my rocks off" He shrugs unknowingly.

When another set of crunches seemed to be getting closer and closer, Harry had whipped his head towards the noise. Y/n had picked herself up from the tree trunk and brushed any dirt that might've stuck to her bum. The material of her jeans was cold and almost appeared wet at the first touch. She knew she would rid herself of these jeans the moment she got home.

"Who's that?" Harry questions, chin pointing towards her as she stood over him. His jawline nearly being highlighted with her phone light.

"It's Niall, c'mon, g'na make sure you get home safely...don't need 't be pressured into drinking anymore" She offered a friendly smile and holding her hands out for him.

He'd placed his feet firmly on the ground and reached for her. With a tight grip on his hands, she tugs his arm to encourage him to stand up. He stumbles a bit getting to his full height- his head nearly bumping her shoulder- but she helps him regain his footing with extra help holding his hands. "Left 'ya here for a couple hours and you've already got Harry all over 'ya Babe!" Niall mocks with a wide grin.

"Oi, shut it" She sasses, holding onto his hand just incase the floor felt like it was going to break under him.

Niall giggles to himself. "Are you done already Styles!" He questions.

"No" Harry immediately smiles, taking steps like he was going to rejoin the party with Niall.

She squeeze his hand before letting go. "Harry's not done, but I am," Y/n yawned. "I'm knackered, 'n I'm takin' 'ya both home. Let's go"

"At least buy us dinner! We're not cheap fucks Babe" Niall jests.

"Should be buyin' me dinner after t'night," She murmurs as the growls of her stomach began to groan again. "Been sittin' here hungry and grumpy...c'mon then. Got a little walk 't the car" Y/n began leading the way towards her car.

Niall and Harry had made drunken conversation on their walk. Niall poking fun about Harry rejecting Angela's offer and Harry gasping about how he knew such a thing. "Anegla's been pouting 'bout it all night," Niall laughs. "I overheard her talkin' 't Oli 'bout it. Apparently she'd been trying to woo him after 'ya told her no. But Oli wasn't having it" He continues to giggle.

Harry shrugs his shoulders as they had reached Y/n's car after a short five minute walk. Niall threw himself in the back seat and offered what Y/n was hoping he would. "Since 'ya been such a blessing Babe," Niall chuckles. "Swing by that ol' drive through. Wit' 'em fries and burgers. 'M treating'" He pats his stomach.

Y/n knew exactly what drive through he was talking about. And she couldn't express how grateful she was. Her excitement may have gotten the best of her because she had done the fastest u-turn of her life.

Both Niall and Harry had been thrown into the side of the car, she heard them simultaneously thump into the car. "Christ Babe!" Niall gasps as he tried to hold onto the back of the seats. "Felt like the bloody car was on two wheels! Would've offered after the u-turn had I known you were going to turn into a stunt driver!" He groans as he situates himself back into the seat.

She giggles as she sits a bit taller in her seat. Stealing one or two glances at Harry, who looks like a stressed Mum teaching their sixteen year old daughter how to drive. "Stomaches been eatin' itself all night Ni! Fucking hungry" Y/n sighs before promising to drive a bit more safely.

"Should've said something befo' the party!" He taunts like he always does.

Y/n grumbles beneath her breath and shoots him a little glare. "Dickhead" She whispers.

Niall gasps with an 'offended' hand over his peck. "Do 'ya hear how she's treatin' me Harry!" He whines. "Here I am, buying all the food her tummy can possibly want, 'n she has the nerve 't call me a dickhead! You wound me heart Babe" Niall directs the last line to her.

Both Harry and Y/n giggle at Niall's little show. "G'na be gettin' Harry 'n I a milkshake too if 'ya don't put 'ya bloody seatbelt on!" She sternly scolds as she notices Niall fall forward after she started breaking.

"Will be gettin' myself one too Babe, don't leave me out of it" He fusses as he defeatedly buckles himself.

-

That night, they all had a big sleepover at Y/n's flat.

The three of them sat around the coffee table in Y/n's living room with Bourbon's orange tail rubbing against any part of their body he could touch. Niall encouraged everyone to get a shake, and they passed around the different flavors they had each gotten. Which then resulted in a heated debate between the three of them. Niall swore his was the best but he was gulping down Y/n's like it was his.

Y/n thought Harry's was better than Niall's, which made Niall want to try Harry's again. "Heyyyy," Harry whines after a large gulp from Niall.

"Still think mines better" Niall announces despite him nuzzling Y/n's milkshake straw back in his mouth.

After their debate, she made a pallet on the living room floor for Harry as Niall claimed the couch for himself. "We can snuggle if 'ya want, but Y/n's pallets are comfortable either way" Niall offers.

She'd already started spreading out an assortment of blankets on the floor when she snorts at Niall's offer. "Don't do it Harry," She warns. "He's a couch 'n a blanket hog. Nearly growls at me when I try to steal some blanket back" Y/n teases.

When they were both tucked in, Bourbon followed Y/n to her room as she did the last little steps before crawling into her own sheets. She decided to leave the hallway bathroom light on, just incase either of them had to wee throughout the night. She also left her bedroom door cracked just incase they needed her. But with that, she snuggled deep in her blankets with Bub's warming her feet.

It'd been a couple days since that night. The next morning she had slipped out early to go grocery shopping and by the time she returned, Niall and Harry were gone. Harry had folded all the blankets into a nice little pile and left a thank-you note for her. Which Niall had signed as well.

Harry lingered in the back of her mind which warmed the tips of her ears and the apples of her cheeks from time to time. She would force herself to shake him out of her mind, especially since she knew someone like Harry had girls after him. She knew she didn't stand a chance and she didn't see herself as someone Harry would want to woo anyways.

She had spotted him sometimes throughout campus when she was in between classes. Y/n could recognize some faces that surrounded him, but she would also notice a few girls lingering around him. Which made sense. Harry was gorgeous, it was no surprise to her that Harry would get this reaction from a few lasses and even blokes. And she sure as hell couldn't blame them.

Instead she would admire from a distance and even then she would stuff her face deeper into her book.

-

His heart slightly raced in the cavity of his chest as he walks out of his lecture. He had tried to fulfill his plan the first week after the party, but sometimes his friends around him made his thoughts a bit fuzzy. Or he would have trouble getting away from the suggestions thrown his way. "Are you going to this party Harry?", "Do you want to study together tonight?", " Up for some coffee before your next class?", and even some lasses being a bit forward and giving a suggestive glance toward the storage closet.

That last one had him choking on his own saliva as he declined with a "No thank you. Maybe next time" Before he and Oliver could reach the quad. The grassy area was the heart of campus and had a lot of students doing their own thing. Picnic tables surrounded the area with plushy grass and even large trees that provided a good amount of shade for the warmer days. If students weren't sitting down with friends or even by themselves, they were walking toward the little food hall or rushing to lecture rooms across campus.

It seemed like there was a place for any student needing one.

Harry had tried to make his way to one particular spot the next few days after the party, but it never worked out. He'd notice her sitting on the grass, next to the tree, similar to how he'd stumbled on her at the party. She was always occupied with a book, her phone, or even Niall and Rhett, who'd he'd recognize after Oliver pointed him out to Harry. And as the days grew cooler, she would always be cuddled into a soft looking sweater. Harry had thought maybe the desire to cuddle into her sweater was drunken thoughts, but that desire was slowly but surely poking at the back of his mind whenever he saw her.

He would wonder what she was reading, whenever he'd look at her, she was always so engrossed in her book. It was no secret to him that she was a reader. He sees a different cover throughout the days he's seen her and he vaguely remembers her living room having bookshelves surrounding her tv. He even vaguely remembers trying to read certain titles, but they hadn't stuck to his muddled brain.

When he finds her in the same spot, book in hand, and a bag of grapes beside her, he just about runs toward her. He'd remember approaching her being a bit easier when he was drunk because as he got closer to her, she finally lifted her eyes to him. Her brows raised a bit when she noticed him walked toward her but she gave him a friendly closed-lipped-smile as he joins on the grass. "Hey there curly," She greets him, leaning further against the tree. "Gotten anymore offers for walks in the woods?" She slightly taunts.

His nose scrunches up as he smiles. "No, but did get a suggestive look to the storage closet" He banters.

"Oooo, little romp action in the closet. How scandalous and romantic," She continues to tease. "What's brought 'ya over?"

Harry still has the smile on his face as he shrugs his shoulders. His shoulders relaxed tenfold just sitting in front of her. Although his heart was still racing, he felt a little lighter than he had been. "Wanted 't hang out with you," He says with the corner of his lips still up. She narrowed her eyes playfully as he giggles. "Also want to say thank you fo' driving me after the party" He says with a grateful smile on his lips.

Y/n's eyes were still-playfully- narrowed at him. Her hands mindlessly pick the bag till a bright green grape sat between her fingers. The grape was quickly plopped in her mouth as she shrugged. "Can I tempt 'ya wit' some grapes then?" She offers, holding out the bag for him to take one.

He'd stuffed his hand in the bag and happily munched on the fruit. The second his teeth sunk into the skin, it popped, and the grape juice fills his mouth. "What're you reading? Looked awfully focused before I disrupted you" Harry pokes, eyes landing at the book still cradled in her other hand.

Y/n's thumb was between the stack of pages and her eyes were quick to glance at the book. It was a crimson red hardcover with a deep gold summary on the back. "Oh umm," As quickly as her playful banter appeared, it was washed away with shy eyes, and even a soft red to the tips of her ears. "I bought a hardcover of this book I read in high school. It was my favorite so I was just revisiting" She explains sheepishly.

This was different. Harry hadn't seen her so sheepish, despite only being with her for a very limited amount of time. "Yeah? Tell me 'bout it" Harry smiles, leaning against his pack and locking his ankles together.

By the palms of his hands resting on his lower tummy, he looked comfortable. Even that dimpled lazy smile had gotten Y/n's ears warming a bit more. "It's just some teenage romance book about a vampire prince and whatnot" Y/n's shakes her head, eyes admiring the hardcover.

"I'm a sucker for romance!" Harry encourages. "And vampires?! I've seen Twilight once or twice before" He muses.

Y/ was quick in kissing her teeth with a lazy grin of her own. "This is not about a vampire who sparkles in the sunlight! This is so much better than a vampire and a werewolf fighting over a girl! This is about vampire royalty from Romina!" She gasps, fingertips holding onto the book a bit tighter.

"Yeah?" Harry laughs.

"Yes!" She puffs. "Lucius Vladescu would take great offense, knowing you would compare his royalty and superior race to that of something out of Hollywood! He would be very disappointed" Y/n argues, earning a wider grin from Harry.

If Harry had known that asking Y/n to explain the book she held in her lap, would've set her off on an exciting tangent, he would've asked so much sooner. He didn't think he would enjoy this conversation nearly as much as he actually did, especially over a book he'd never read.

She was so passionate about the details throughout the book. There were so many moments where Harry was just captivated by every little word she spoke. He caught himself leaning forward as Y/n noticed how long she had been rambling. Her cheeks were painted nearly the same crimson red as the book cover and her hands hid inside the sleeves of her sweater.

This was only his second time being around her. He'd thought that maybe his drunken mind hadn't remembered the night correctly. Or even misinterpreted the warmth spreading in his chest for her kind gesture of taking care of him when he was drunk.

But it didn't seem like that was the case.

-

Much like Niall dragging her to parties, Rhett and Libbie had the habit of doing the same thing. Studying with Libbie and playing video games with Rhett was more bearable than some of the parties Niall dragged her too. But regardless, she would agree to tag along after a bit of back and forth. Even when she really didn't want to study or hear Rhett whining about how his controller was working against him in a game of Mario Kart.

Yet, the last thing she wanted to do was meet Libbie after lectures in a reserved study pod on a Friday evening.

But Y/n still did.

"Hey" Her bright blonde bob with tinsel tied at the root smiles at her. Her manicured hands reached to assess the mess of folders, binders, notebooks, textbooks, and skewed pens- creating a little space for Y/n's materials. "Guess what happened in labs today?"

The way her hazel green eyes shimmered told Y/n what she was holding her breath for. This study session wasn't going to be filled with just studying. She didn't know why she had been so against being in her own thoughts as of late. Instead of going around and around in daydreams, lesson material, and new books she was reading like she normally did- she demanded her own thoughts be distracted by something else. Her brain had grown tired of being stuffed with information and daydreaming was becoming treacherous waters for her.

So she was delighted to hear all about the chemical reactions Libbie was experimenting with in her lab course. Even if she had no idea what thermite reactions were. (By the sounds of it, it was explosive and fiery)

"They did that in labs?" Y/n questioned after Libbie had demonstrated the crackling and neon orange reaction she observed.

"Yeah! I mean it was outside and the class was standing like twenty feet away," She shrugged. "Even got to snag some of these! There from the molten iron" Libbie presented three pea-sized iron balls that was smudged with black debris.

Y/n picked one up, rubbing the cool metal between her index and thumb. "That's mighty cool" She softly smiles and placed the trophy back into Libbie's palm. "Reckon I wouldn't have believed you had you not had 'em little pebbles" Y/n teases.

The lab results was the first of many different topics they discussed. Libbie covered all areas from lectures, work- she had many different odd jobs- and personal life. Y/n offered questions here and there, getting lost in everything Libbie was telling her. Especially the workplace drama between owners at a local pub she was hired at. "He did that in front of the customers?" Y/n gasped.

Libbie gave her a fierce nod. "Yeah, made it totally awkward. Like I get why he was mad, but it wasn't punching a wall bad," She shrugged, her fingers twirling a pen. "It was even worse having to act like everything was totally chill. A few customers closed their tab and left...everyone left after they went into the walk-in and started yelling at each other" She winced like she could still hear them.

"Sounds messy, have you been back since?"

"Nope." She popped the 'p'. "I had to request a few days off for school, but Will told me that it's been super slow the last couple days. Probably because everyone saw them arguing"

Y/n scoffed through her nose as she nods.

"Can I ask you something?"

"I'm not going to take one of your hot pilate classes." Y/n shook her head. "Rhett and Niall are dragging me to another party tomorrow so I'm not waking up early on my day off to 'detoxify my body' and make a fool of myself in front of everyone. I'm sorry, I just can't"

Libbie tossed her head back, hand covering her mouth as she laughed. "No! I wasn't- I mean one of these days you're going to take my hot pilates class, but that's not what I was going to ask you." She continued to giggle as Y/n let out an audible 'oh'. "Just wanted to ask what's going on with you and Harry?" Her tone was teasing and suggestive when she said Harry's name.

As quickly as she was able to let go of her thoughts and just indulge in the work drama with Libbie, everything came flooding back. The bit of tension of having to come up with an answer. Her heart racing in its cavity hearing his name. Hell, the tips of her ears and length of her neck flushed deathly hot like they had been doing since he wondered over to her under the weeping willow.

"Nothing." She stated, her tone even and luckily masking any and all nervousness she was feeling. "Why do you ask?" Her real curiosity peeked out.

Libbie shrugs, a soft and reassuring grin over her lips. "Heard Angela complaining 'bout how Harry had left her for you." She admitted. This didn't help settle Y/n's nerves or racing heartbeat. "Wasn't sure if she was just being dramatic or whatnot. But I did see Harry siting with you the other day." She was so nonchalant about the conversation it made Y/n flush even more for being so jittery. Y/n knew even if Libbie hadn't taken this nonchalant position on the topic, she would still be understanding if Y/n didn't want to talk about it.

"Oh," She let out a small breath. "He just came to say thank you for taking care of him. I had him and Ni spend the night after a party. Went shopping the next morning and when I came back, they were both gone" She felt the need to explain herself.

Her friend nodded. "Guess Angela took that as Harry leaving with you. But I could'a sworn I heard Oli say she was trying to woo him." She tilted her head. "Or maybe it was Niall. Anyways, are you and Harry bezzies now?" Libbie thought out loud, proving time and time again that she blurts out whatever comes to mind.

Y/n shrugs, "Dunno." The same thought had been swirling through her own mind. "Just been hanging out between lectures. Just assumed he's got nobody else to hangout with during that time" She answered honestly, despite a little sting echoing in her chest.

Her friend gave her a skeptical glance, her eyes squinted and lips pressed together. "Nobody else? 'M sure someone like Harry has loads of friends...and if not friends, plenty of suitors wanting to spend some time with him" Libbie had a point there. Y/n had seen this first hand. He was always surrounded by friends and classmates. She felt like a creep after she'd taken note of a new face surrounding him everyday.

It made her skin spike with goosebumps as she mentally scolded herself. "I guess you're right." She agreed. "I dunno, guess I haven't really thought about it...certainly didn't think someone else would be so up in arms about it either" She lied.

Of course that thought had crossed her mind. More specifically as she tried to fall asleep for the night. As she revisited the events from the day, her heart would pick up ever-so-slightly recalling Harry finding her again under her tree with another book. The same question of what she was reading would break the ice till they've gone off on a tangent, which was only broken when either of them realized they were going to be late for their next lecture. Y/n wondered if he only hung out with her because he felt guilty about the party. Or maybe like he needed to repay her for her kindness and hospitality. She would pout at the idea of him feeling like he needed to repay her. But even during these thoughts, Y/n would daydream of Harry actually enjoying her company. She would play these events, picture them as if she were reading a book, and often fell asleep with a smile on her face as she played pretend.

"Don't sweat it" Libbie had giggled softly. "Was just curious. Hey, do 'ya wanna pack up and grab dinner? Kinda wanna stuff my glob while watching Teen Wolf"

-

Y/n was better prepared for the night.

She didn't feel like she was-in the beginning- when Rhett and Niall decided to pregame at her flat. They had brought over beers to guzzle from as she debated which sweater would keep her the warmest. Which wasn't a problem till they're boisterous laughing picked up and ten second later she heard ceramic breaking. When she had rushed out of her bedroom, it was silent, Rhett and Niall were already looking in her direction. Both of their fingers were blaming each other for the broken vase.

Despite the broken vase, she had stuffed an old flashlight she found in her closet into her back pocket and made sure she had a portable charger with her. She'd gotten lucky last time with Harry stumbling over to her and Niall being hungry to leave earlier than normal. But since Niall would have Rhett, it wasn't going to work in her favor.

So, she got comfortable against the weeping willow. Her flashlight illuminated better than her phone did and she killed a lot of time reading a book she stuffed in her bag. Mindlessly, she began reaching for the bag of crisps she'd thrown in there and snacked.

Rhett had sent her a few messages throughout the first hour and half of being out. Asking the normal questions like are you alive, are you sure you don't wanna join, do you have any snacks on you, and why wouldn't she bring a bag of crisps for him. She giggled at the last question, rolling her eyes as she rejoined the fantasy world of her book.

Enjoying the book was too much of an understatement. Not when the book had her blushing, squealing to herself, and even checking over her shoulder to make sure that nobody could see the absolute filth she'd been reading. And especially not when she didn't even hear the whisper of her name and crunching of leaves coming closer to her.

The sting in her cheeks and her hand trying to cover up the splintering grin on her face could be seen through the shadows of the willow's weeping branches. Harry hummed to himself, equally surprised but completely expecting to find Y/n in her natural state. The sight of her pulled a boyish smile on his lips, drawing him in deeper to the little oasis she always created.

An oasis he couldn't find anywhere else, not that he bothered trying.

He was finally in front of her when she'd let out an audible squeal, her fingers tightening on the cover, and eagerly turning the page. Harry gave a tummy-filled chuckle as he watched. "Is this about Romania vampire royalty too?" He asked through his amusement.

If the chest tightening gasp didn't show her surprise, then her wide eyes and slaw jaw did. "Harry!" She squealed, dropping the pages but not before her thumb sat between the pages. "Where the hell did 'ya come from! Scared me to bits" Her hand was flushed to her heart as she could feel the pulse in her fingertips. The sheer panic had made her regret wearing the warmest sweater.

"Was calling y'er name when I came up" Harry laughed, hands in his front pockets, layered jackets over his torso, and beanie pulled over his ears. "What's the best way to interrupt someone who's so submerged in their book, they don't even notice someone walking up to them and hollering their name" He questioned rhetorically.

Y/n's neck craned up to him as she displayed a pout. "That's easy! You don't!" She playfully scolds. "Especially if they don't even hear you hollering their name." Her eyes rolled but a smile replaced her little pout.

"Noted" He nodded his head. Harry had took confident strides till he was closer to her and sat down. His smile was still painted on his red lips and he'd never looked so soft and boyish. "This book have vampires like the other one?" He pointed with his hand hiding in his jackets pocket, toward the book in her lap.

She shook her head softly, running her fingertips over the skull on the front. "I mean yes there's vampires, but other creatures as well...but no, no vampire royalty." She regretted for the second time that night, wearing her warmest sweater. It felt like she was suffocating in the knitted fabric and sweltering emotions.

"Tell me about it"

There it was again. The question that made her glance at the book and to the boy in front of her. And then came all the scenes her mind painted for her as she read.

She was-really- going to suffocate if she didn't get ahold of the blush, embarrassment, and adrenaline running through her.

"I-It's a bit dark. A romance fantasy book...umm it plays with the nine circles of hell. But there's magic and games." Y/n's skin was on fire and she couldn't stop fidgeting with the necklace hanging from her throat. It felt taboo-not only explaining the book- but being excited to do so. But then that voice at the back of her mind made her words fumble over one another.

Harry smirked, hand reached out and asking to see the book. 'He's trying to kill me' Y/n thought as she handed him the book, remembering the page she was last reading. She doesn't know why she handed it to him. She once again regretted her decision, especially as he began inspecting the book.

Her heart was a pounding mess. "Huh, would'a never guess," Harry teases, pointing to the skull, red roses, and golden necklace over the book's cover. However, it wasn't till he opened the book that her heart completely stopped. "What's a Blackwell?" He asked with a crunched nose.

All her words were failing her and she desperately needed the cold winter air to slap her across the face. "Uhh he's a phantom...the love interest in the book" She choked out.

"Ye alright love?"

'No!' Her brain screamed. Against her better judgement, she nodded and gave a tight smile. "Yeah" She reaffirmed.

Which ultimately made Harry go back to the book and browse over the page he opened. And that's when her worst nightmare happens in front of her. An even wider smirk spread across Harry's lips and his eyes glanced over to her. Almost like his eyes were a sword, holding her against the tree trunk, she couldn't even swallow without feeling the sharpness of his stare poking her in the throat.

"Well I hate to spoil this for you...but Blackwell just tore off her clothes" Harry taunted.

"Harry!" She gasped, immediately hiding herself in her hands and crunching herself into a defensive ball.

This set Harry into a fit of laughter, closing the book, and holding it against his tummy as his shoulder bounced. "What?" He giggles, wiping under his left eye. "There's nothing wrong with reading this. Some people watch porn, you just happen to read it" He continued to joke.

Y/n grabbed the book from his hands- scared he would read even more of the smut- and threw it into her bag. "Nobody likes to be caught with porn, whether they read it or watch it" She murmurs.

Harry threw his head, laughing more, but this time Y/n offered him an amused grin. "Well, depending on who you ask. Otherwise, very true." The comment had both of them laughing, Y/n shook her head.

"Any other suggestive looks at storage closets or walks in the woods?" She asked, tilting her head till it rested on the bark behind her.

Once again, Harry's lips were painted in a boyish grins as he shook his head. "No, think everyone took the hint 'm not a cheap fuck" He bantered. "Deserve at least a movie and dinner"

"Glad they got the hint" She teases.

"Me too" Harry genuinely smiled.

An army of butterflies fought war in her tummy and the tips of her ears felt the surge of blood rushing to the tips of them. She felt lightheaded- like she was held underwater for hours and she had just came up for a breath, gasping for air, and trying to clear the muddled fog in all her senses. If she didn't know any better, she would accuse Harry of magic.

But rather than letting her mind conjure up anything and everything, she asked, "What's brought you this way, hmm? Don't seem spacey in the eyes and you're not slurring."

"Came to find you" He immediately responded. Which hit her like a splash of cold water. And it was not helping the control over her thoughts. "Saw Rhett 'n Niall a while ago. Was trying to find the right time to leave the group, basically ran this way when everyone was arguing 'bout some footie game or whatnot"

"Didn't have 't leave the fun. I'm basically g'na be here all night" She sighed with a content smile.

Harry shrugged. "Wasn't fun over there. Having more fun now than the whole two hours I spent wit' all 'em" He responded.

"Angela invite you again?"

The question was abrupt. It didn't give her time to mule over Harry's soft eyes and even softer response. Nor did she have time to reanalyze how it might've sounded a bit pushy.

Luckily, Harry didn't seem to give it a second thought. "No, Oliver actually dragged me to this one. Said something 'bout how Holly had a friend who was interested in me and well he likes Holly so I didn't have a choice" He shrugged.

"I don't know curly, sounds a lot like a suggestive glance to a storage closet" This time she couldn't pass up the opportunity to throw a little taunt.

And it seemed like Harry took it as just that when he chuckles with her. "Did your little smutty books tell 'ya that?" He poked right back.

Y/n couldn't stop her snort. Instead, she closed her eyes and tried to cover the laugh that was crawling up her throat. She failed as she felt a tug in her tummy and rather than fighting it, her hand hovered over her smile as she giggles. "My smutty books didn't have 't tell me anything. That's just common sense"

"I guess so," He tucked his chin to his chest. "Common sense or not, didn't wanna hangout wit' 'em. Not when you're a better time"

The last fifteen minutes of suffering in her flushed skin didn't compare to the sweltering heat that consumed her at his admission. Every pore and centimeter of her skin was set ablaze and it felt as if she was the chemical reaction Libbie had told her about. She wanted to throw off her sweater and be left to the cold elements- an attempt of many she would make just to ground herself a bit more before she said something she would regret.

"Aish, y'er just saying that because 'ye wanna another floor pallet 'n milkshake t'night" She jabs with a slow shake of her head.

"Aish! 'Ya caught me, guilty as charged." Harry placed his wrists together- hands once again hiding inside his jacket pockets- and acting as if he had handcuffs over them. "A milkshake sounds great right now...despite nearly freezing me bullocks off"

"We'll have 't stop fo' one on the way home" Y/n giggles, shaking her head at his comment. "Dunno how soon that'll be, suppose Rhett 'n Niall are having the time of their lives" She mocked.

Their banter only went on from there. Harry had no trouble making Y/n curl up in laughter while she threw jab after jab to continue the jokes they were bouncing off one another. Both their laughter had echoed in the deserted surroundings and it felt as if they were hiding from the world. Like they were children hiding underneath a blanket or in a tree house, talking about anything and everything that came to mind. The flashlight illuminating their own little hideaway as they got comfortable on the forest floor.

Harry had inched closer to her throughout their conversation before he finally crawled to the space next to her. Muttering something about how his back was a bit achy and he needed the trunk to lean against, which Y/n didn't second guess till he sat right beside her. His body heat came in overpowering waves and his arm was flushed with hers. Finally, her mind took control and played with their scenario. Playing with countless "what if's" and trying to convince her of something she was certain didn't exist. His back simply hurt. Nothing more, nothing less.

Sitting beside one another, they rest on the body of the tree and just looked into the weeping branches that swallowed them whole. Their giggling had faded into an appreciated silence and the music echoing from the party sounded even further away than before. The warmth of their interaction and the boy sitting beside her made a soundless yawn escape, wondering if today was the day she would fall asleep while waiting for Niall and Rhett.

But it seemed like her thoughts had summoned them both. She could hear Niall's boisterous laugh and Rhett's snickering grow in volume with the crunching of leaves. Despite not knowing what they were giggling about, Y/n could surely tell they were drunk. Niall's laugh was flowing like the beers were and Rhett was spewing everything that came to mind.

"Babe! Is 'ya phone off or somewhat? Why in the bleeding fuck are 'ya-" Rhett entered the harbor created around Harry and Y/n. His voice stopped at the sight of the couple and a grin spread over his face. "Well guess 'ye weren't ignoring me texts! Told 'ya so" He pointed toward Niall.

"Oh fuck off! 'Ye didn't tell me shite!" Niall slapped his accusatory finger. "'Ye just moaned and groaned that she wasn't answering. The fucker thought 'ye got eaten by a bear or some shit" He admitted.

Although Y/n had been enjoying the comfortable silence around her and Harry, she thought Rhett and Niall were pretty entertaining. "Sorry Darlin', hadn't checked me phone or noticed 'ya text. Are 'ya having fun?" She questions, bending her knee to point toward the height of the tree.

Both lads grunt similarly. "Guess I wouldn't be checking my phone either had Harry came 't visit me," Rhett taunts. "Can't believe you traded 'ya lads for this little cozy place...can't blame 'ya though. Just know, she promised me a cuddle t'night"

"Oi, fuck off," Y/n's giggle was careless and soft. "Didn't promise 'ya anything besides a ride home. 'N Harry didn't trade anyone. I dragged him over here. Couldn't stop yapping 'n the gent was just entertaining me" She lied so smoothly.

She could feel Harry's arm grow stiff and practically saw his heart stutter at Rhett's accusation. Immediately, she could foresee Rhett and Niall teasing Harry. Which was just part of their personalities, but Y/n wanted to mediate a bit, so the lie slid off her lips so easily. But as she thought about it, it wasn't total lie! She was yapping a bit so Harry really didn't have an opportunity to rejoin the party. Even if he said he didn't want to.

"She does yap a lot" Niall muttered, plopping on his bum in a clumsy way.

Y/n rolled her eyes. "Shut it, 'ya gave Rhett, Libbie, 'n I a three hour presentation 'bout golf strategies 'n how your life dream is to attend the championships 'n get a green suit or whatnot" She kisses her teeth playfully.

"Nooooo" Rhett whined, tossing his head back, covering his eyes with the balls of his hands.

"Oi, 's called The Masters 'n 's a green jacket!" Niall defended with an offended gasp. "Some presentation I gave if 'ye can't even remember that!"

"Wasn't paying even the slightest bit of attention Ni" She admitted.

"Me either" Rhett sighed, sitting down beside Niall.

"Libbie has always been me favorite anyway"

Everyone- including Niall- stopped for a second and just giggled. Giggle at the chaos of conversation and just how quickly everyone was poking at each other's buttons. Nothing but friendly fire before it was brushed off and a new topic was brought up.

Rhett put his arms behind him, leaning against his palms as he tilted his head side to side. "Didn't 'ya come wit Oliver, Holly, 'n Holly's friend...Bianca?" He asked, eyebrows crunched.

Harry had been playing with his beanie, having swiped at his hair underneath it a bit till it was to his liking, and put the beanie back on. "Yeah, they still out there?" Harry tilted his head.

"Yeah, think Bianca was actually looking fo' 'ya." Rhett admitted. "Someone had said 'ye went 't the bathroom 'n then she went out looking fo' 'ya"

Within his many layers, Harry inched a bit close to Y/n as he searched for his phone. One of his jackets had a breast pocket on the inside where he had pulled out his phone. The light blinded both him and Y/n as he tapped it to life. As Y/n was going to look away from the screen, he turns it to show her. Oliver had sent him a handful of messages that they were both reading.

*Oliver: Where'd 'ya ran off too? Being a bloody woodland nymph!

*Oliver: Holly, B, 'n I are by the fire

*Oliver: Alive????

*Oliver: Hello????

*Oliver: Oi, Bianca is complaining to Holly about you ditching her. Where tf are you???

*Oliver: Alright now Bianca's feelings are actually hurt, come find us ASAP

"Guess 'ye weren't the only one ignoring someone's messages." Harry smiles at Y/n just as she finished reading the texts. She didn't know how Harry would've smoothed this over with Oliver or Bianca. She felt guilty for stealing Harry and keeping him to herself. Especially when he admitted that Bianca had came for him.

Poor lass was probably thinking the worst of Harry. And what would she think if Harry reappeared with Y/n at his side.

Y/n shook her head. "C'mon, got 't go talk 't her" Y/n announced. She picked herself up, dusting her bum off and grabbing the nearby flashlight.

"Who Babe?"

"Bianca." She double checked her bags inventory and zipped it up once everything was accounted for. "Don't want her feelings 't be hurt because I yapped Harry's ear off. Especially if she came 't spend her evening wit' him...'ye lads wanting 't stay longer?" Her eyes skimmed over Niall and Rhett as they got up messily.

It seemed like the floor wobbled underneath them as they caught their balance with a few extra steps. Which told her everything she needed to know.

"No. Party was a bit of a bust." Rhett reached to the sky and Y/n could hear the little cracks of his knees and back. "How 'bout a movie 'n food at 'ya flat" He suggested.

Y/n shrugged. "G'na have 't pick something up, don't wanna cook." Without another word or protest, the four of them made their appearance to the campsite.

Usually four to five fires were going and the overlapping conversations would be louder than the music. The campsite would ooze with energy and the crowds of people were easy to spot even from Y/n's willow tree, despite the distance.

But not this time.

Instead, three fires were crackling, a soft hum of conversation echoed, and music was playing over the conversations. A lot of people were still enjoying their time and it was still busy enough for Y/n to retreat to her tree. But it wasn't the busiest night the group had seen.

When Rhett had found Oliver, he got to him with everyone else just behind. "Harry! Where've you been!" Oliver's eyes were a bit wide and Harry could feel the heat rising up his neck to his cheeks.

Harry hadn't been thinking. He didn't consider disappearing would hurt Bianca's feelings or that disappearing might've pissed off Oliver. He- at the very least- could've popped back in or sent a message explaining where he'd gone. Harry just wanted to see Y/n. He didn't get to see her Thursday or Friday after lectures and he hadn't asked for her number. It was almost like he was fixing for a hit of the high she always gave him. Everything was just so easy around her and she had a way about her that made Harry attracted to her.

All of these thoughts had flooded his mind despite Oliver waiting for answer. Like a deer in headlights, Harry froze. "My fault Oli, hadn't realized I was holding him up. Couldn't stop yapping 'n then Rhett and Ni joined. We all lost track of time."

If Y/n was proving something, it was that she would take the fall no matter what. Harry didn't know why she didn't just throw him under the bus. Even the first time Harry had stumbled toward her, she took the bullet. Y/n had covered for him and Harry felt guilty just telling her do that. She shouldn't have to be the bad guy just because his brain stops working around her.

"'S not 'ya fault Pet." The nickname had fallen off his tongue, he didn't even realize he said it till the heat enclosed around his ears. Harry was grateful he'd just tucked his ears back inside his beanie. "Shouldn't have wondered. Went 't look fo' a drink, stumbled on Y/n, 'n had me phone on silent."

By then, Bianca and Holly had joined their circle. Bianca's arms were crossed and Holly looked a bit peeved at Harry. "Leave it 't Y/n 't prattle someone's ear off" Oliver immediately began to joke.

Y/n's jaw went slack and her eyebrows crunched. "Do I really talk that much!" She squealed playfully.

"Just teasing 'ya" Oliver giggled at his own little joke. "y'er as quiet as a mouse! Don't know how you became friends wit' Rhett and Niall here"

"They took my silence as me listening and never left"

The once quick tension instantly melted away. Oliver had threw his head back while Niall and Rhett started grumbling on about something. Even Harry couldn't help the little grin on his lips, but it faltered when Bianca stepped closer to him.

Conversation had grown mute to him when the fellas started throwing playful jabs to one another. Harry had rubbed his hands on his pants and smiled softly to Bianca. "Sorry 'bout running off. I was g'na head out right now, but here. I can shoot 'ya a text next time Oli 'n I go out or somewhat" The words had escaped his mouth before he could rethink everything.

It didn't help when Bianca snatched his phone out of his hand and immediately input her number "Or you can text me to grab some dinner. I'll be free Thursday night, we can grab coffee Monday after lectures too" She smiled and handed his phone back.

Harry didn't bother to look at his phone. Instead, he clicked it off and shoved it in his pocket. "Umm sure maybe" He'd never been so thankful for Niall when he announced he needed some food. "Bye" Harry awkwardly waved and followed Y/n.

"Burgers?" Rhett offered as everyone shoved themselves inside her car.

"Nooo burritos!" Y/n twisted her key and immediately started pressing all the buttons for the heaters.

"I vote burritos too" Niall stated.

Like meerkats, everyone turned toward Harry- who had just buckled his seatbelt in the passenger seat. "Thought we were getting milkshakes?" He looked over to Y/n.

"Its a tie"

Y/n and Niall looked at one another, seeing if either one of them wanted to change their answer. "I'll fill up 'ya tank if we grab both" Niall offered.

"Deal"

"She's on empty mate"

-

Despite her mixed feelings and many swirling thoughts, she couldn't help the warmth sprouting from her chest. It oozed from her heart and flooded her system. It was almost like the biting cold and stiff joints from the cold temperatures didn't matter. Her insides were warm and her mind was finally liberated from everything trying to constrain it.

Her flat smelled of burritos, greasy burgers, loaded fries, and this time Rhett had joined in on the debate of favorite milkshake flavors. "Ni's is straight shit" He pointed at the foam cup in-between Niall's palms. "Think Y/n's is my favorite...I even like Harry's better than mine"

"Ni's isn't that bad" Harry shrugged. "It's just pistachio...should try it with chocolate added to it."

When their food mess was forgotten on the coffee table, Y/n brought out blankets, turned off the lights, and gave the remote to the lads to fight over. She claimed the whole length of the couch, laying down on her side, curled up in the softest blanket she reserved for herself. Rhett had grabbed her ankles and lifted till they were settled over his lap. Niall sat on the floor where her hand had been resting, picking it up at the wrist, and pushing it in his hair. Harry took the spot next to Niall, pouting that he hadn't thought about Y/n running her fingers through his hair.

Well, he had definitely thought about it. But he was afraid she wouldn't like that idea.

It was inevitable for Y/n to fall asleep. And she did before the title was even shown on the screen. So it was a surprise for her when she woke up in her bed the next morning. In desperate need for water, she shuffled to the kitchen, stopping in the living room to see the three lads sprawled out on the floor.

So, yeah. Her heart was really warm and she etched this image in her mind before grabbing her water and going back to sleep.

-

Y/n was fucked.

She tried to prevent this, she really did. But it was just one of those situations that no matter how hard she tried, it was bound to happen sooner or later. At least that's what she was telling herself to make her inner turmoil settle.

It wasn't working.

Not when her heart was pattering against her ribcage, her cheeks were flushed, and a splitting grin was over her lips. Goodness, she probably looked loony sitting underneath the tree, after class, with the smile that had wormed its way on her mouth.

Her book was split over her thigh, her last page forgotten when she checked her phone after it vibrated with a text. An unknown number had sent her two messages, introducing himself, and asking a question that had been similar to one within her suppressed daydreams.

*Unknown: Hiiiii it's Harry!!!

*Unknown: I saw this rad bookstore that made me think 'bout you! Wanted to know if you wanted to check it out with me tonight? I can pick you up at 5??

So much was running through her thoughts. How did he get her number? He thought about her? How often? Or was it just when he saw books she would pop into his mind? Was this a date? Or was this just friends hanging out?

It had to be friends just hanging out. Right? If he wanted it to be a date, he would've said it was a date. And Harry would've asked her in person rather than over the phone. Especially if he was sticking to routine that they had built of joining her under her tree after his lecture. Plus, it was Monday night. Totally not Friday night or Saturday night when dates normally take place.

Right?

*Harry: Hope 'ya don't mind me asking Niall for your number! I had wanted to ask for it the other night, but that milkshake debate got heated!

Regardless of her questions and attempt to go back to her book, she sent Harry a message agreeing to his offer. The feverish blush didn't go away and would only intensify whenever she saw the hours dwindling down to 5. The excitement of browsing new isles filled with books and maybe finding a book or two she would fall in love with had her heat picking up. Of course, not because of the lad who thought of her when he saw a bookstore.

Nope, not because of him.

And definitely not when he knocked on her door at 5 sharp. Or when she opened the door to find him in another beanie, layers, and a boyish pink smile.

Harry must've been excited to see the books as well.

"Hey Y/n." Harry wanted to slap himself. His voice came out breathless and his mind couldn't even process the events throughout the day. All the predate anxieties twisted his stomach into painful knots while his heartbeat was pounding underneath his skin. He wanted to rip off the beanie as his skin was on fire with his two jackets following as sweat was sure to start building on his skin.

"Hey curly" Y/n had stepped out, locking the door behind her, and flashed him a wide smile. "So, where's this infamous bookstore 'ya found? Think it's time I broke my book buying ban" Her laugh had shook his head, legs feeling like jello as he hadn't registered that they were walking toward his car.

"A ban from buying books?" He felt like a fish out of water just repeating what she said. "Why would you do that?"

"I asked myself that for..." She picked up her phone and looked at the screen. "...two months. But I was spending wayyyy too much money on books. Especially when I couldn't read them fast enough. But I think I earned a new book or two" Y/n shrugged, trying to ignore Harry opening her door and not closing it till she was settled comfortably.

"But every time I see you, you've got a new book in 'ya hands" Harry commented, his car roaring to life, and warm air shooting out at them. "Surely you've got 't be reading them fast"

"Ehhh, faster than the average college student maybe. I revisit a lot of books"

"Why's that?"

The drive was filled with her explanation and more questions. Listening to her talk allowed Harry to relax, but when she'd laugh and throw her own little joke after his, reassured him that she was enjoying his company. For as much as she could explain the books she read, list off all the books she still hasn't read, and throw witty comebacks, it left Harry confused.

Not because he couldn't keep up with her explanation. Never because of that. Y/n always explained in ways that allowed him to follow and gave him opportunities to ask questions when he didn't.

Harry was confused on what her feelings were towards him.

Y/n was so nonchalant in the most responsive ways possibles. Like when she would joke with him, but then ask about the offers thrown his way and Angela. Or when Y/n would smile and blush for the compliments or flirtatious comments Harry would give her, but pivot the conversation to something else. And the way she looked at him with wide eyes and a squeal in her throat, but disappear into the maze of books.

It gave Harry whiplash at times. Like now, when he was trying to find her among the piles of books.

"There 'ya are, I lost 'ya fo' a second." He smiled, seeing her sitting down at the base of a shelf, five books stacked to her right, and a sixth book in her hands.

Harry sat beside her as she gave him another one of those soft smiles. "Sorry...guess I should'a warned 'ya. I'm a wonder-er in bookstores." Her cheeks ran pink and her eyes flickered from her book to Harry in a shy glance. "One time, Rhett had to have help from staff members to find me. Still took 'em fifteen minutes to find me. Wish I could show 'ya their faces when they saw it was me they were looking for and not a five-year-old"

Again, Harry sat beside her and giggled. "'S okay, 'm glad 'ya liking it here. Was really nervous it wouldn't be up 't par wit' all the other bookstores 'm sure you've visited" He admitted.

Y/n looked at him as if he had five heads and snakes for a beard. "Are 'ya kidding! Love this place already! These types of bookstores are my favorite! Like how cozy 'n home-y they feel. 'S not all sterile 'n polished like other bookstores 've been too" Her words were spoken in a tone of conviction and it took the load off Harry's shoulders.

She loved this place. The place that Harry had stumbled upon and showed her. Harry was the reason behind her smile and appreciative glaze on her eyes.

"'M glad 'ya like it Darling." His voice was from the core of his chest and ignited the heat that spread over her skin. The nickname once again slipped, but it didn't make him mean it any less. "Maybe we can find a book we can read together." He'd been thinking about asking her the first time he saw her with a book. It could be a makeshift book club- just the two of them- that he could use as an excuse to spend more time with just her. Harry would even take her to the weeping willow tree, book and picnic basket in hand, during the day so they could build that sweet oasis again.

"Really? I-I didn't even know you liked to read" The question or conversation hadn't come up, surprisingly. Y/n had meant to ask him- but partially assumed Harry did read since he brought her here.

Harry shrugged with another boyish grin. Damn that boyish grin and its pair of dimples. "Yeah-" Harry didn't even know he liked to read till Y/n asked. "I would even be open 't reading all that filth 'ya like so much." He jabbed.

A surprised smile inched over her lips and Harry's never been so close to just smashing his lips on hers. "Can't just let 'ya jump into the filth! There's levels 't this H" She laughed, the pink deepening in color.

"What like I need 't have prerequisites before reading smut?"

Y/n shook her head side to side. "Kinda! I mean, can't just let 'ya read-...think of it like learning how 't swim! 'Ya don't just jump into the deep-end. You start in the shallow with floats 'n whatnot" Her tone was in between a constant state of teasing and being totally serious.

"Bloody hell, what are they doing in these books!" He was both serious and amplifying his curiosity. "Are they fucking with tools, guns, 'n goblins?" It was a rhetorical question, one that he was hoping to get a rise out of her.

But when he sees her eyes go a bit spacey, his eyes widened. "Don't think I've actually read one where goblins fuck" Y/n mindlessly reveals, many different plots, scenes, and characters coming to the forefront of her mind. None with goblins. "Yeah can't say I've read a book with goblins having sex" She firmly stated.

There's a pause between the conversation. Harry stared at Y/n as Y/n stared back at Harry. Of the list Harry had stated, he fully expected the goblins to be a yes and everything else would've been a no. How would someone even have sex with a gun or tools? Neither seemed very erotic to think about.

"Wow" The word slipped out breathlessly. "You're amazing"

A snort escaped Y/n before a flood of giggles erupted from her chest. She never would've expected Harry to call her amazing, especially after she'd admitted to reading sex scenes with tools and guns. Y/n expected a lot more questions following her omission. Certainly not Harry giving her starstruck eyes and compliments.

"See, baby-steps. We'll start you off with floaties and lukewarm water, yeah?"

"I may not have read smut with tools and guns, 'n whatnot like 'ya" Harry had a playful tint to his tone. "But I know how 't swim 'n 've watched porn. Surely that meets some requirements"

"Harry!" Y/n squealed at his omission, flushing a dangerous temperature in her sweater.

-

Last night had been a fever dream.

Regardless of being a hermit and constantly yearning to be at her flat, Y/n loved spending time with Harry in the bookstore. It gave spending time at home by herself a run for its money because even then she didn't laugh as much as she had with Harry. Everything that could go right, went right and then some. Harry took Y/n's advice on which book to get- with his established requirements- and they'd bought a copy to start reading together. He'd even bought the two other books that Y/n had decided to take and wouldn't take no for an answer.

They ended the night over a pastry and coffee before it grew later into the night. Lectures were still due tomorrow and Y/n had agreed to study with Libbie again. She couldn't help but wonder how late they would've stayed out if responsibilities weren't restricting them.

Y/n had tucked herself in for the night after Harry had dropped her off. She'd fallen asleep and woken up with the same smile on her face that she bid Harry goodnight with.

It was out of a book. And not a smutty one.

The sun had appeared by the time she approached her usual tree. One of the books Harry had gotten her was already turned to the 100th page and her eyes were skimming every word. Reading was a favorite pass time of hers, but indulging in something that she'd remembered was bought by Harry made it better. She couldn't pinpoint why that was exactly nor could she understand the feelings that were blossoming in the pit of her chest. It was like her blood was surging with caffeine, her body was jittery, a smile wasn't too far behind, and the constant reminder of Harry caused her pulse to skip or stutter. If she didn't know any better, she would've accused Harry of being a witch, plaguing her thoughts and seizing her ability to go on with her day, herself.

But she did know better. And instead, she slipped further and further away into the pages. Her mind was at ease, her heartbeat mellowed out into a steady pace, and her body slumped into the tree trunk. Perhaps she'd been in control a lot more than she wanted to admit.

"Y/n!"

All the relaxation she'd reached was swiped away by the call of her name. She'd flinched and nearly ripped the page she'd thumbed- instead it was crumbled and her fingers immediately tried to smooth it out. The spell was casted and she could feel the effects once again.

"'Ya scared me H!" She kisses her teeth. "What're 'ya doing here? Thought 'ya lecture was due soon?"

"No Pet, it just finished up"

Her eyebrows crunched as she reached for her forgotten phone, seeing the time displayed in bold. How could she have lost track of time? So much time that she needed to hurry and meet with Libbie in their reserved pod like she promised.

"Oh!"

"Y'er enjoying the book that much eh?" Harry had noticed it the second he spotted her. He'd been secretly hoping that she would be reading it or at least carrying it around. He wanted to treat her to a new book that would hopefully become her favorite. Harry wished that she'd think of him every time she revisited it. Or that he would cross her mind when she saw it. Similarly to how she crosses his mind with everything around him.

Y/n nodded, closing the book to look over the cover once more. "Yeah, 'm already 200 pages in. Started it last night over a cuppa befo' bed" She stated with a tender smile. Her admission made Harry's heart picked up and his dimples were printed on his cheeks.

"Good....'m glad y'er enjoying it Darling" His voice was velvety in her ears and she just adored his nicknames. Or maybe it was just the nicknames pointed at her that she adored so much. All these lines were blurring faster by the second, it made it impossible to decipher. "Was thinking we can start-"

"Harry!"

At least it was before the realm was shattered.

The shrill of his name made Harry and Y/n glance in the direction it came from. A ball of energy bounced her way toward the pair, smile reaching her ears, and a rosy blush spread on the apples of her cheeks and the tip of her nose.

"Harry! I got 'ya text" Bianca had giggled, hugging his waist and snuggling a bit into his torso. She had glued herself to him, arms encircling his hips, and not making any effort to move. Harry had returned the hug, but when he realized she wasn't letting go of him, his arm sat awkwardly around the tops of her shoulders. "You'd mentioned grabbing coffee on campus, but I was thinking we could grab some off campus. I know a spot" It wasn't a question or even a suggestion.

Bianca hadn't left any room for discussion. Whatever conversation they had, it was going to play out the way she wanted, there wasn't room for anything else. Similar to the way she held onto him.

"Oh umm sure okay" Harry sounded unsure of himself.

But whatever tone he used, it still cut into Y/n. How could she'd been stupid enough to forget that Harry had asked for Bianca's number? Harry had said it himself, he was going to message her even after he'd left with Y/n. And she was silly for acting like Harry left with just her. Cause he hadn't. Harry tagged along with Niall and Rhett...for the milkshake he'd said he wanted earlier in the night. Because despite it hiding behind her joke, Harry agreed and it was silly of her to forget that.

Details like that mattered, but they were always the same points she'd forget when daydreaming.

When playing pretend.

"Okay let's go! I remember you saying that you like pistachio and chocolate? They've got amazing croissants, we can split one" Bianca gushed.

Almost like the universe wanted to torture Y/n, she noticed and stared a bit at Harry holding Bianca's hand. The excited lass was pulling him in the opposite direction.

"Wha-okay sure but wait-" Harry rushed, cheeks painted the deepest red he's ever worn. "Hold on a mo'...Y/n! Wanna start the book t'night?" He raised his brows with wide eyes.

"Oh I didn't know you liked to read!" Y/n was already growing tired of her voice. Which wasn't fair to the girl. "What book are you reading?"

"Some book" Why did that hurt Y/n the most? "T'night?" Harry seemed like he was grasping for both patience and an answer.

Y/n swallowed against a hard lump weaseling its way in her throat. "No...'m busy" Y/n wasn't busy, she didn't have plans for the rest of the week actually. But she spit the answer before standing to her full height. "Have fun on your coffee date-" Even though he'd taken her on one just last night. "I've got 't go study with Libbie"

She offered them a wide smile- her teeth biting the inside of her cheek- and took off to the library pods. She ignored the excited squeal that rung from Bianca and just how low her heart had sunk in her body. Well, she tried her best to ignore the pulsing hollowness echoing in her chest, the watering and boiling fire over her eyes, and the venomous voice taunting her with every heartbeat.

A slap in the face. One that she deserved. Y/n knew of all the suitors after Harry, she knew she couldn't be jealous of that. And truth be told, she wasn't. There wasn't a centimeter of burning in her lungs from her chest tightening, the lethal insecurities oozing in, or even her mind comparing herself to someone like Bianca. No there wasn't any of that.

Instead, she could clearly decipher the emptiness in her chest, the rapid blinking over her cloudy vision, and spiteful thought circling through her head as the purest form of self sabotage. Her blood was tainted with pity. Her heart tenderly pounded in its cavity and it was further fueled when her brain repeated his words on loop.

Some book...

Some book.

Some. Book.

The same book they'd scavenged the bookstores shelves and giggled over. A book they'd both thought sounded amazing to get lost in and jab over the smutty scenes. Words on a paper that would be the first she'd experienced with someone else.

Nope, it was just some book.

Just like she was just a friend.

Exactly how she'd forgotten.

Specifically how she was reminded.

-

"Are you okay?"

Why was that such a shit question? Why couldn't Libbie ignore the fact Y/n had been trapped in her thoughts and certainly wasn't listening to her workplace drama. If she wanted to know what was wrong, why not wait till they were away from Niall and Rhett- who Y/n didn't want listening to the answer. Who would poke and prod till they were satisfied with the answer she gave.

And who immediately looked at Y/n once the question was asked.

"Yeah 'm fine"

"Bullshit" Niall was quick to hiss out his response. "What's goin' on wit' 'ya? Y'er somewhere far away"

"Nothing just tired. Stayed up late last night" Again, not a total lie. But really not the truth either.

Rhett narrowed his eyes at her before shaking his head. "Partial truth. Let's try asking a different question. Why did 'ya miss the opportunity 't make fun of Ni pissing on 'ya bath rug?" She really despised Rhett sometimes. Y/n always thought the three of them would be great friends to have if something ever happened to her. Surely, they would lead authority to the right place with how perceptive they could be. But that perceptive eye was a real thorn in her side when she just wanted to ignore the malicious voice snickering in her mind.

Y/n shook her head and shrugged. "Didn't hear the opportunity to bring it up. If I had, I would've" She reassured with wide eyes. "Because the prat still hasn't replaced the rug. Almost slipped the other night getting out the shower. I'll be sure 't send the medical bill 't him when I do" Another attempt to assure them she was okay.

Even though she knew she wasn't.

And it seemed like they knew that too. Right thorns they absolutely were.

Niall, however, couldn't stop the kiss on his front teeth. "Oi, put a shirt on the floor in the meantime!" He was quick to hiss. "This redirected anger doesn't have anything 't do wit' a curly headed lad?" He tilted his head with analyzing eyes.

"No"

The answer was short, quick, and snippy. Which said everything they needed to know. Why? Why didn't Y/n wait a beat longer before answering? Why didn't she keep that spiteful voice in her head? Why did she have to prove Niall's point with just a simple word.

Libbie dropped her pen with a crunched brow. "Just saw 'ya hangin' out befor' me lecture? Surely, nothing could've happened in that short interaction!" She thought, glancing between Y/n, Niall, and Rhett as if they knew something she didn't.

She would be surprised.

"No, nothing happened. 'M fine" Y/n pressed, grabbing her pen just so her fingers could hold something.

"Aish, why's it such a hassle 't get 'ya 't talk?" Rhett shook his head. "C'mon Babe, it'll make 'ya feel better if 'ya just talk 't us. Promise, nothing will leave this pod. Swear it" His fingers crossed his left peck.

Y/n chewed the inside of her cheek. There's no way talking about it would make it better. It would make it worse. She would have to admit to others that she likes Harry, that she threw herself in a one-sided 'relationship'- if she could even label it as such. She would have to hear her own voice speak the words she's been suppressing for so long.

"We already know 'ye like him Love 'n we know he likes you" It was almost like Niall could read her thoughts.

"I don't 'n surely he doesn't either"

Rhett rolled his eyes. "The lad tucked 'ya into bed. If he didn't like you then he would've left 'ya on the couch," He reasoned. "Hell, if he only saw 'ya as a friend, he would've let Niall push 'ye right off!"

"What? Thought 'ye did that"

Both Niall and Rhett shook their heads. "That was all Harry Babes. Mate looked like he was tucking in his most prized possession. Half expected him 't leave a kiss on 'ya forehead." Rhett continued.

She hated what that information did to her stomach. She loathed how her heart sunk further knowing he didn't kiss her forehead goodnight. Even Rhett had done that when he was drunk.

"Probably would've had we not walked into the room" Niall pipes.

Fuck.

"Was just being sweet 't me because I gave him a ride after the party" She fought, a shake of her head as she stared at her notebook.

"The same party he left fo' you," Niall raised his brows. "The both of 'ye would've stayed there all night if you had the chance. C'mon Lovie! You can't actually believe that he doesn't like 'ye when he's practically glued 't you! Always talking 'bout you. Even turning down Bianca"

"Then why would he take her out on a coffee date when he just took me on a date last night!"

"What?"

The three of them had surprised eyes and gapped mouths at Y/n's admission. It made her feel even smaller and like she should've just grabbed her stuff and left. Before all their reasoning and questions got to her like they clearly did.

Rhett scooted closer to her and rubbed the length of her back. "Babe, it's okay. Take a nice, big, slow breath. C'mon, let me see" He demonstrated a deep breath, urging her to follow. Which she did, feeling the tightness getting worse on the surface of her lungs before she blew out the same breath. "Good, again" They repeated this four times with Rhett's large hand rubbing circles on her back.

"What happened when 'ye were with Harry?" Libbie asked, voice as soft as the cashmere shirt she had on.

"Aish, I hate the lot of 'ya" Y/n hissed, closing her eyes before shrugged her shoulders defeatedly. "Harry text me yesterday. Took me 't a bookstore he saw...Said he thought 'bout me when he saw it. So, we went, looked around, 'n he bought me books. Even picked one we would read together" Her skin was on fire and she could feel the heat pooling in a layer of sweat. "We got coffee afterwards 'n just talked fo' hours- felt like if we didn't have lectures t'day then we would've been there all night"

Libbie smiles, nodding encouragingly. "That's cute honey. Nothing wrong with admitting that or even being happy 'bout it. Sounds like the perfect date" She reassures, her eyes glistening.

"Don't know if it was an actual date 't be fair" Y/n spit out, still trying to armor her own feelings. "It couldn't have been. But I was reading one of the books he bought me when he came up 't me. Asked if I was enjoying the book and if we could start our book tonight...then Bianca showed up"

Her tone was the most viperish it'd been. Which-again- wasn't fair because it wasn't Bianca's fault. Harry had shown her interested, invited her out for coffee, and she was excited. Y/n just hated herself for playing pretend for far too long.

"How'd she know where Harry was?" Niall questioned.

Y/n shrugged. "'M assuming Harry text her. She said she'd gotten his message. And instead of going for coffee on campus, she knew of a good one off of campus. Even said they had his favorite, some pistachio and chocolate croissant or whatnot. He even agreed 't split one wit' her"

Rhett's hand had doubled its efforts in rubbing the tension from her back.

"And on top of that! The book we chose- together- was now just some book!" She scoffed, pissed off as if she hadn't been brewing over it for an hour already. "Can 'ya believe that! Some book! Why couldn't he tell Bianca it was the best book in the damn bookstore! Why couldn't he say that those pistachio-chocolate croissants were just some croissants"

Okay, that part was equally petty and jealousy speaking. She couldn't help herself.

Petty or not, her friends giggled at her little rant. But everyone shook their heads like they agreed and understood. "Course they are. Pistachios aren't even good, 's the perfect way 't ruin chocolate. Stupid of her 't even suggest they would be good" Libbie decided- a firm head nod in her direction.

"So are you g'na read wit' him t'night?" Rhett asked.

Y/n shook her head.

"Good, we can stay in. We can order burritos, stay in, and binge watch whatever show 'ye want"

Which is something she always desired, especially on the night she has to go out with Niall, play video games with Rhett, or study with Libbie.

But now it was different...

-

The week had been torturous.

Dodging Harry had felt never ending, but by Friday it seemed like he'd gotten the message. She never realized just how much time they spent together and what his absence would mean. It was weird- in the sense that it felt like there was a big hole in her days. Despite only spending a few months together, Harry's absence was noticeable -for lack of a better word.

Even when Y/n had been suffocating with Libbie, Niall, and Rhett. Who had been smothering her, but she knew they meant well. So, she took their company with open arms and enjoyed doing what she enjoyed the most. Being locked in her apartment, ordering take-out, and just shooting shit. She never realized how much she missed out on their daily lives. Like Rhett's dates with a special little lass, Niall's golf club he built, or even Libbie's many different achievements with labs and pilates.

Friday night they decided going out for dinner and a few drinks would be best before- ultimately-they pitched in for a bottle and guzzled from said bottle afterwards. A killer headache was waiting for everyone the next morning.

By now it was Saturday night.

Y/n was left to her own devices and Bourbon. The fat orange cat was warming her feet as her hands cradled a bowl of soup. Soup from a can she'd thrown on the stove and couldn't be bothered to heat up for longer than two minutes.

A true crime documentary echoed in the background as she scrolled mindlessly over her phone. Seeing the many different book reviews and switching between her social media and notepad- writing down a never-ending TBR list.

"Haven't read a professor and student book in'a while," She spoke to the cat- who blinked slowly at her. "'S got paranormal 'n smut...bit of a dark academia vibe 't it. 'N he's morally grey" She noted, switching over to her online delivery app and putting it in the cart.

The fur ball meowed loudly at her, like he'd known she was on that specific app.

"Need more treats huh?" She hummed, remembering the heart shattering meow he'd let out when Rhett had fed him his last treat. "Fine, but 'ye only getting two from now on....'em vets are g'na yell at me if 'ye get any bigger"

Before Y/n could find the treats she normally buys for Bourbon, her screen is taken over by two buttons and Harry's name. Her heart sunk to the floor and a cold sweat broke out on her skin. Y/n couldn't believe the complete yearning that took over her heart nor the hurt that muddled her brain. The battle of forces- trying to decipher what her next move was. Her mind screamed at her to ignore the call. If she wanted to protect herself and ignore the feelings that had been stewing in her system all week, she needed to let the phone ring. But her heart wanted relief. It wanted to hear Harry's voice and feel the lightest its ever felt. So she needed to answer the phone if she were to give into her desires.

The green button granted her a chance.

The red button solidified her decision.

-

Harry needed to sober up and get a fucking grip.

He'd been swimming in his thoughts all week and now it was accompanied by alcohol. He should've thought about this, like actually put some thought into the whole situation. Instead, he was too wrapped up in her oasis- doing everything he could to stay and revel in it, but fucked it up in the process. If he had even a semblance of a chance to make this up, he needs to practice those boundaries.

Y/n had been aces at them.

But those boundaries also got in the way of her desires. That was clear from the beginning. Her self discipline was so admirable. Everything about her was. Harry had been smitten from the start.

And he'd gone a fucked it up.

"Llo?"

Or maybe there was a chance after all?

"Y/n? Hi"

If he didn't spit something out then he's sure he would fuck it all up. Maybe even worse this time.

"Hi" It was small, soft, and he wanted more. Harry wanted her to yap his ear off till his ears couldn't work anymore. He wanted her there, right now.

"I wanna-"

"Oi Harry!" The shout of his name made him jump. Trent had slapped his shoulder- a lot harder than Harry liked- and pushed a red cup to his chest. The red jungle juice splashed over the edge, coated Trent's hand, and the center of Harry's shirt. "Noticed 'ye needed a refill! Go on! Have a swig!" He encouraged.

Harry didn't want it. "Oh 'm actually on the phone-"

"'Ye can drink 'n chat!" Trent chuckles, hand again slapping his shoulder. "Heard from Holly that 'ye went 'n broke her friend's heart. What's that 'bout?"

Holly had been here? If Holly was here, then Bianca had to be too. Harry needed to leave, now. "Nothing, 've got 't go-" But it didn't matter what Harry said.

"Thinking 'bout leaving already Styles?" Garrett asked with his own red cup in his hand. "'S not even late. C'mon stay fo' awhile! G'na miss the whole party" He insists.

Boundaries Harry, boundaries!

"No thank you...calling me girlfriend-"

"Don't let the missus ruin 'ya night" Trent threw his head back. "Just tell her 'ya went home or whatnot. Garrett 'n I will vouch for 'ya. Tell her 'ye left at nine sharp"

Bloody hell, this wasn't going to be easy.

"Okay...Yeah sure, I'll tell her that now...give me a mo'" He lied, pushing past them to the front door. "Y/n? Are 'ya still there?"

"'M here...where are 'ya at? I'll come get 'ya"

"Really?"

"Yes, already in the car"

"Thank you Darling....miss you. Miss you so much. Was waiting at our tree 'n was shattered 't pieces when 'ye never came. Understand that I kinda fucked up, but swear 's not what it seems like! Just wanted 't let her down easily 'n wanted 't read our book. Still wanna read our book, wanna learn 'bout all 'em smutty scenes that 'ye like 't read or the little worlds they transport you too! 'N I miss being 'round 'ye, it's been hell wit-"

"Harry!" Her voice had stopped his rambling. "Button, can't see me any sooner when I don't know where 't go. Can 'ye tell me where 'ya are Love?" Y/n's voice noticeably softened and Harry could even hear a bit of a smile in her tone.

"Yeah...yeah I can cause I just wanna see 'ya 'n hug 'ya," He promises, hand dropping the cup he hadn't realized he was holding. "'M down Campus drive. The last house with them white poles 'n stupid flags of shapes"

Y/n giggled...she actually giggled at Harry. Which had to meant he was making progress.

"Can't believe 'ye went 't a frat house 't party" She hummed amused.

"Had 't drink me sorrows away...thought I wouldn't be able 't talk 't you anymore" The alcohol had him loose lipped, but Harry would admit this to Y/n if he was stone cold sober. He just needed to be given the chance.

But there's a pause over the phone. One long enough that he took the screen off his cheek, but still saw she was on the other line. "Nonsense Button," She sighed delicately. "Go 'n wait in the bathroom or somewhat. Don't want those frat bastards 't pressure 'ya into drinking. I'll be there in a mo'"

Harry agreed and did as told when the phone call ended. He swayed his way back inside, Garrett and Trent yapping where he'd left them. "Look who's back! Where'd 'ya drink go!" Trent pointed to his empty hand but red stain still on his shirt.

"Oh ummm, drank it already" He spite out, despite vividly remembering he dropped it on the porch.

"Let's get 'ya a refill!" He began pushing Harry's shoulder toward the large doorway leading to the kitchen.

"Wait, gotta wee"

"Go 't me loo upstairs. 'Ye g'an wait fo' ages down here," Trent offered, pointing to the stairs on the other side of the house. "Up 'em stairs, 't the right, fifth door" He directed, more of his own drink spilling on the floor and over his hand. "Hurry, we're all g'na take shots! 'N 'ya better be down here fo' 'em! Or else I'll drag 'ya down myself!" He threatened.

Harry knew he would hold true to his threat too.

Shuffling through the crowd made him hot and sticky. Lots of unheard 'excuse me's' and disgruntled grunts when he'd stepped on someones foot, knocked into someone's shoulder, or even the body he'd rammed into when turning to the right hallway like Trent told him too.

"Sorry...didn't see 'ya sorry. 'M sorry" He apologized with a slur to his words.

"Harry?"

Bianca was flicking her hand at her side. He'd only noticed then that her cup was crumpled on the ground and the juice had covered up her forearm.

"Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean 't run into 'ya..." He didn't know what to do. Harry was swimming in alcohol, feeling thirsty, and desperate to see Y/n. "Need the loo...umm how are you?" He also had a rambling problem when he was intoxicated.

"Just came from the loo, but now 'm g'na have 't go back 't wash me hands" She hissed.

Turning on her heel, walking down the hall, to the fifth door with a little poster on the door. With slow, unsure, steps, Harry followed her into Trent's room with an attached bathroom. He watched as she went to his bathroom, turned on the lights, and washed away the residue of the juice.

Part of him prayed Y/n would get here soon. He didn't want to be alone with Bianca, but he didn't want to be out there in the crowd even more. He hated how he just shifted side to side on his foot, looking at Bianca and then around Trent's room.

When the water had shut off, Bianca let out a little scoff from her nose. She had been watching him through the mirror. Part of her had hoped he followed her into the room to make a move on her. Thinking maybe he'd changed his mind or at least wanted to test out just kissing her. If he'd kissed her, she would let him, and see if maybe things would progress from there.

Harry didn't.

"Geez, you're drunk" She shook her head, twisting to face him while drying her arm. "Why'd 'ye follow me in here?" Bianca knew he'd tell the truth. Especially if he was drunk.

"Oh, I didn't" He stated. "Trent said I could use his bathroom...'m waiting fo' Y/n"

Bianca rolled her eyes, throwing the towel to her side a bit peeved. "Figures," She muttered. "Don't know why 'ye like her so much. She's just some weird little virgin who hates parties but still goes out to them just to read or whatnot"

Harry didn't like what Bianca was saying nor the tone she took while saying it. "No she's not. I like a lot 'bout her. She's protective and caring. Doesn't care what anyone thinks...she so special 't listen to. She's got this little light that only shines once 'ye get 't know her" Harry's own admiring smile widened across his face. His heart picked up speed and his head grew even more spacey.

"She won't know a thing 'bout pleasing you" Bianca argued, taking a daring step forward.

But it went unnoticed by Harry. "That's not true...she already does just by telling me 'bout the books she's read. 'N letting me read wit' her. Don't think I could ever please her the way reading does... definitely have competition there" He noted, more-so for himself.

Her jaw tightened and she wanted to to scream. "Then why ask fo' my number? Why lead me on? I mean, you had to have liked me at some point" She pressed.

His throat bobbed before the alcohol took control. "No...went 't the party fo' Y/n. Oliver had dragged me there too because he likes Holly. I only got 'ya number so I could explain my feelings for you...which I did. Told you, I didn't mean 't lead you on. I'm sorry that I did" Harry felt like shit. Really, he did. He knows what it's like being devoted to someone when they're devoted to someone else.

Being everything but first option, priority, etc, hurt.

In all aspects.

"Did you ever want to kiss me? At least?" They were closer than they started. Bianca had marched up to him, her heaving chest just inches away from his steady one.

"No"

The answer fell from his lips as the door opened.

Harry's head was almost spinning from how fast he turned to see their visitor. Y/n stood in a hoodie and yoga pants. Her hair mused and messed with and lips formed in a pout with a layer of chapstick.

"Am I interrupting?" Her eyes shifted from Bianca to Harry.

Bianca huffed annoyed. "Nope, he's all yours. Thanks for nothing Harry" She growled, stomping out of the room, leaving Y/n with Harry.

Her eyebrows raised and her eyes were questioning him. But he didn't give her any explanation. Instead, he marched up to her and threw himself in her chest. Nuzzling into her hoodie like she'd given him an invitation.

"I'm tired" His voice was muffled as he buried his face in her throat. Body wrapped around her like a vine, she was overheating in more ways than one but she couldn't tell him to move. She wanted him close enough that she could continue to feel his heartbeat. Arms that strong should feel suffocating with how he wound them around her body and kept her to his chest, but she would happily drown in him if it meant keeping him right in this place.

He was just better at speaking those desires out loud.

"I just want you to be with me all the time. As much as I love coming home to you...I don't want to have to keep leaving you behind. Is that too clingy of me to say?"

Y/n had no idea what he meant but understood the feelings behind his rambling. At least she thought she did. He was drunk after all.

"No 's not clingy Button" She spoke tenderly, fingers brushing his hair back as he nestled deeper into her throat. "Wanna be with you all the time too...missed 'ya an awful lot this week" Y/n reassured.

If Harry had the ability to purr, he's sure as hell he would. "Missed 'ya more Petal. Missed you so much, won't even believe me if I could describe how much I missed you. Wanted 't tell 'ya all 'bout a new bookshelf I wanna buy, 'n how I saw these matching sweaters that would look right cute on us, oh! Oh! And 'bout-"

Harry was cut off by her giggle, His ear right over the sound that he just wanted to coo in delight. "Still can tell me all 'bout that...but not here. Smells like dirty socks 'n alcohol" She jabs.

"Think the alcohol might be me" He pulled away, showing his ruined shirt with the jungle juice stain.

Y/n glanced over the stain. "Got a change of clothes fo' 'ya....can take a shower at my place. Let's just get the fuck outta here"

With no other protesting on his end, Harry allowed Y/n to pull him downstairs. They were about to leave when Trent had hollered Harry's name.

"C'mon the nights still young! Stay 'n have a shot! She can even stay 'n have a few wit' us" He promised, handing his own drink to Harry.

"Not interested" Y/n dismissively stated.

Trent lifted his lip in disgust. It seemed like not a lot of people turned him down for a drink. "Then let the lad stay fo' himself. Don't need 't be a nag and ruin his night" He spit.

"Not ruining anyone's night besides yours, you twat. Fuck off, we're going home"

-

Being with Y/n equally sobered him up and gave him a high.

When she offered Harry her shower, he lathered himself up in her body wash and strawberry shampoo. Loving that he smelled just like her, like he'd been marked hers and hers only. Harry was even thrilled to be bundled up in her clothes- an assortment of men's t-shirts and sweats that she loved sleeping in. Not only did he smell like her, he was wrapped in her clothes, and was getting closer to her haven.

Harry was home.

After gathering his things, he exited the bathroom and wondered into the living room. Y/n was lying down, eyes trained on the telly, and Bubs lying in her chest. Harry wants to be in her arms, watching the telly with her.

"All done?" Y/n questioned.

Harry nodded, keeping his ball of clothes at his side.

"Lemme take those, I'll throw 'em in the wash," Y/n stood- the cat meowing his protest, but jumping to the other side of the couch. "Have some meds on the counter fo' 'ya. Go on, I'll warm up some soup or somewhat" She promises before disappearing to the other room.

Under her instructions, Harry when to the kitchen, grabbing the pills, and drinking all the water poured in a cup for him. With a wet gasp, his chest heaved a bit as he was able to catch his breath. He missed this. He missed her.

As Y/n walked into the kitchen, Harry was rubbing his eye with his knuckle. His face looking pouty as if she'd just woken him up from his nap and he was trying not to fall back asleep. His hair was soft and bits of it began drying. Y/n wondered if Harry was always a drunk cuddle or if it was just the circumstances that made him extra soft.

He watched as she walked around the kitchen, pulling various things from the cabinets, fitting a pot and pan on the stove, and occasionally giving Harry a glance. "'M sorry fo' calling 'ya while I was drunk" Harry murmured.

"Why're 'ya sorry?" She genuinely asked.

"Cos, I had been drinking 'n I let the alcohol get the best of me," He reasoned. "It's just...I wanted 't call 'ya before I started drinking- had been wanting 't talk 't 'ya since Bianca came up 't us at our tree. Cos I swear, it's not what 'ya think. I didn't ask her out...well I mean I did but not like that" His words and thoughts were stumbling over one another. Harry couldn't blame this solely on the alcohol, that effect had been dissipating since he walked into Trent's room with Bianca.

With the stove flicked on, Y/n turned to look at his emerald gems. "Then what was it like?" She asked, her voice fragile. It made Harry's heart seize and he felt like he'd been thrown in an ice bath.

"I-I got her number cos I wanted to explain why I disappeared....that I was with you because I like 'ya. Would've told her at the party, but I was afraid 'ye leave wit' out me 'n well, I didn't wanna ruin her time at the party" He swears, palms rubbing the length of his thighs."S-So I text her 't meet me fo' coffee...thought it would be best 't tell her in person rather than over the phone. Felt like I owed her that much...but then it turned into something it wasn't!"

Y/n was spinning. She missed Harry loads, but that didn't stop the rattling hurt coursing through her. In an attempt to ground herself, she picked up a can of soup- heating that up- and began making grilled cheese for the both of them. "Well, what was it?" She asked, encouraging him that she was listening.

Harry sighed, running his hands through his locks that were drying to his forehead. "Ummm a scheduled breakup 't sum it up," Harry shrugged his shoulders. "But she ended up taking me to this coffee shop- the croissants weren't very good- 'n she yapped my ear off. When I had finally got the chance 't explain that I wasn't tryin' 't woo her- I was trying 't woo you- she got up in arms 'bout it. Said I was rotten fo' leading her on 'n that if I didn't wanna woo her, then I shouldn't have asked her out...Didn't think I asked her out, but I guess I could see the misconception" Another red color flooded his cheeks.

She hated how much lighter this made her feel. She shouldn't take pleasure in hearing that Bianca was turned down. Y/n shouldn't reframe it as Harry left Bianca for her. It wasn't right...but she would be lying if she said it didn't make her heart stutter.

Goodness, she needed to get a grip!

"So when 'ye took me out, you didn't ask me out?"

Again, the question was abrupt. Y/n hadn't meant to actually ask it- instead it was a passing thought as she was trying to hurt her own feelings. It made it easier to ground herself and not take so much enjoyment out of Harry's confession.

Especially when the same could be said about their night out.

"Course I asked 'ye out Darling" Harry confessed. "Had been thinking 'bout you when I saw the bookstore, was thinking of more ways 't hangout wit' 'ya when I said let's read a book together, was even thinking 'bout you during my coffee outing with Bianca!"

Now she was sure her skin was painted the reddest color she'd ever worn. The fires from his praise licked her skin and she could even feel the clamminess coat the top layer. "Oh, okay...good. I-I mean not good that you were thinking 'bout me when 'ye were wit' Bianca...but still umm good" Her brain was muddled with emotions she kept trying to sort through.

Sure this was all very reassuring and it made the hurt feelings slowly dwindle, but now she was trying to figure out what this meant. Did this mean they would go back to normal? Or would they start dating and their normal look completely different?

"I-I didn't mean 't hurt 'ya. Just thought I was doing what was right by asking Bianca 't coffee so I could tell her in person" Harry confesses with hooded eyes.

"'Course you were doing it right Handsome," Her heart stuttered in her chest. "That's very kind of you. Yeah, me feelings were hurt 'n I was stunned 't see you go out wit' Bianca after our date the night before. But I see where you're coming from" She soothes, the sizzling of the pan echoing over her soft voice.

She could hear Harry walk over to her before she felt his warmth radiating off of him, onto her back. His large arms enclosed around her waist, his chest flushed with her back, and nose nuzzling into her neck. ""M sorry I hurt 'ya feelings. Wasn't my intentions. Should've told 'ya before Bianca came up. I'll remember that if there's a next time"

Harry was just so soft. Everything about their situation oozed domestic and Y/n felt like she was in her element. She was happy flipping both of their grilled cheese, she reveled in the warm embrace Harry had, and she had everything she needed.

"What were you 'n Bianca talking 'bout before I came into Trent's room?" It was another mindless thought that popped into her head. She wasn't trying to dig for a 'gotcha' moment. "She looked pretty irate wit' you" She admitted.

A puff of warm air escaped his nose and traveled down the exposed skin of her throat. "She's still upset that I led her on...ehhh I think she misinterpreted me asking for her number and asking her 't coffee. I-I think that was my fault though" He sighs, shaking his head, rubbing his cheek on her shoulder. "She asked if I at least wanted 't kiss her, at some point or another...told her no"

Y/n let out a surprised gasp. "Harry! 'Ye did not!" She choked. Which only earned a confirming nod from the lad glued to her back. "Well now I know why she stormed off...can't blame her. Surely that didn't feel good"

"Lying 't her would've been worse...she could've kissed me if I lied and said yes" Harry grumbles. "Didn't wanna kiss her, just wanna kiss you. Just want you"

It was almost impossible to go ridge or tense in his arms. His warmth coaxed her to a near sleepy state, but his words had her heart hammered against her chest. For a brief moment, she wondered if he could hear or feel her rapid pulse from how deeply he was nuzzled against her. If he did, he paid no mind to it.

And then she acted on impulse.

Twisting on her heel, she pushed Harry till his bum was at the edge of the counter behind them. Now being chest to chest, Y/n rises on her tippy toes- keeping a steadying hand on his chest- and pushes their lips together. Harry's lips were equal parts plushy and warm- both elements drawing her deeper. His hands were firm reminders that this was real, especially with how desperately they grasped her skin. One hand moving from her jaw to the back of her neck, directing her in for another kiss. His other pushing her closer to him on her lower back.

Y/n couldn't stop her own hands from wondering. Her fingers ventured into his hair while her other hand tugging his shirt- as if to get him closer. She had spent the week away from him, now it was time to catch up on some much needed time together. Despite how clingy that sounded. Y/n made up her mind, and now she wasn't going to lose it.

Harry's tongue poked out- swiping the bottom of her lip- while he tugs her hair a bit. A pleased hum escapes her mouth before she pushes against his lips. She didn't want a breath, she wanted to keep kissing him.

"Greedy fo' my kisses?" Harry's voice dripped in ecstasy and Y/n was addicted instantly.

"Yes" she answered honestly.

"Hmmm, did 'ya smutty books tell 'ya, you would be?" He teases, smashing their lips together before she utter a response.

That is till a smoky scent hit their noses.

"Fuck!" Y/n gasps, turning in her hazy senses, to find two burned grilled cheese. Luckily the soup wasn't in the same state or else she wouldn't have anything to feed Harry. "Oi, 'ye almost made me burn the flat down!" She mocks, flicking the burned sandwiches in the sink and running cold water on them before tossing them in the trash.

Harry's mouth fell open. "What! Me!" His hand pointed to his chest. "Y'er the one who got that hot little mouth on me!" He argued playfully.

"Y'er the one that wanted my hot little mouth"

"Yes, 'n I still do" He grabbed her waist and urged her to turn around. Smiling in victory as she complied and giving her a longer kiss as a reward.

When they broke, their eyes explored one another's face. "C'mon, let's eat 'n then we can go 't bed" She beams.

"Can we kiss some more?" Harry shyly asks.

"Dunno, sounds a lot like 'ye suggesting a walk in the woods" She taunts, but pushes another plushy kiss to his lips. "Yes we can Handsome, c'mon"

#hs4 is coming

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#hs4 is coming