Hi there... It's been a bit since I wrote anything here! It has been a crazy hectic (and stressful) last couple months. I think things are settling down for a while. (Fingers crossed)
So, 6th wedding anniversary with Hubsters just passed. Still very much in love with that dork 🖤🖤 and still very much glad about having married him. Hopefully this year he's going to have more time home and not travelling so that he can invest some time in dating. He hasn't had much time or luck the past couple years and I really want for him to be able to make some connections of his own. He deserves some good ol fashion NRE. :) It hasn't been easy for him and I want to be able to compersion at him damnit. He's wonderful and 10/10 I would recommend him. Someone else needs to experience his snogging. It's a disservice to the world that I'm the only one enjoying it right now.
6th monthiversary with Jitsu passed earlier this month as well. He's still a wonderful partner. He's been supportive and understanding with my crazy schedule and stressed mindset as of late. Honestly has helped keep me sane through it and while I was a little brain raccoon worried about how the massive drop in my sex drive would affect things, he more than understood AND just wanted to be able to spend time with me in any capacity. So. Sweet. Also, I get the feeling he has caught more feelings for me than he thought he would going into this (but in a good way). Like... I can almost hear the crackling of him wanting to say he loves me in the air but perhaps is worried because, ya know, he's been with his wife for like 15 years now and before me had only had a few dates and one sex buddy since opening their marriage. I'll let that go at his pace.
And so, that brings me to another update! My best friends, the couple that surprised me by indicating interest in me in return of mine in them? And then nothing really came of it? Well, last night we had a really good conversation. She (Breezes) is still not ready to do anything to explore her sexuality and we talked through some of the top of mind hang ups she's got (spoiler alert: she is in fact not the only person with the ones she has, myself included). I then directly asked about her comfort levels of anything happening between me and her hubs (Manta) separate of anything happening between us or all three of us. Pretty comfortable, just wants to be present at least in the beginning as anything unfolds. Fine by me and Manta! In fact, preferred by Manta because of his concerns and anxieties about how she'll feel about things and also to help get over the trained thoughts of monogamy betrayal. Much later in the evening, we gave it a go. I kissed my best friend while my other best friend sat behind him on the couch with her hand in my hair. Oh. My. Gods. Y'all. I kept myself pretty restrained out of concern and wanting to keep things slow, but fuuuck. It was real nice. Manta then kept alternating kissing us and was so giggly and adorable.
So, uh yeah, those are my latest updates in my adventures in poly. I'm in a good place all around 🖤
