Ok hold up. I am having an awakening of the darkest kind : I've worked my arse off to be where I am now career wise. I worked for it. Anyway, ever since the news of my long term relationship coming to an end has been in the open, my previous general manager, the two previous headchefs, a waiter and a sous chef have been explicit hitting on me. The people that helped me throughout my careers are taking the first opportunity of me being single to slid in my PM and explicitly ask me on a date/ask if I'd be interested.
So now, now, for the first time in my whole career, I'm wondering if I actually worked for it, or if it had been handed over to me on a silver plate? Is my career the product of men being attracted to me? Would I be a dual general manager today if those men did not fancy me?
This is fucking up with my mind. No joke. I... Listen, I am about to cry. Because in the shitshow that is my life, I had my career to hold into. It might not be healthy, but I could look at myself in the mirror and proudly say "You made yourself. Look at you. Against all odds, you did it." And now, this is being taken away from me? Now, I'm looking back at my career, and all I can think about is "where there any skills involved or was I just a piece of meat they treated well in the hope they'll get to bed me?"
Damn son, I need a drink. A strong one.