﹢ lost in 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯
KOR / 𝐄𝐍𝐆 / 𝙲𝙷𝙽
there’s friendly, lighthearted chatter to his left---and to his right: frustrated, livid criticism. he breathes in through his nose, d e e p, his eyes trained on the half-painted picture of a green-backed flycatcher. and then gunhak says something in english, something kun unfortunately understands. he slams down his brush, breathes out, slow. “please excuse us.” with a dozen pair of eyes boring into his back, he grabs gunhak’s wrist and yanks them outside, leaving nothing but questions and a fluttering piece of painted paper behind.
“what is wrong with you?” despite resistance, kun keeps his hand tight around gunhak’s wrist, his untrimmed nails digging crescents into the warm skin. “you’re being so . . so 𝚞𝚗𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎---𝐮𝐧𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞. 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞, 𝐭𝐨𝐨. 𝐢 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭.” the annoyance that swells within him is unfamiliar, as is the volume of his own words. he doesn’t like raising his voice, doesn’t want to raise his voice, especially in such a public, family-friendly setting---but he can’t control the fire that burns.
“𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤.” he lets go of gunhak’s wrist and runs that hand through his hair ( blonde, rooting, just another damn thing on his checklist that he hasn’t had the time to do, ‘cause he’s been busy with going to class, traveling to perform, tutoring for his part-time, and to top it all off, raising his roommate ). “𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭. 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭. 𝐝𝐨. 𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐧 𝐢𝐭---” he runs his fingers run through his hair once more, this time tugging at the ends out of irritation. calm down. breathe.
( but he can’t. )
“𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝 - 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝 𝚍𝚘 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝚒'𝚖 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚌𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝚒'𝚖 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝚒 𝚌𝚊𝚗’𝚝 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎, 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚒 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚑 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞. 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚒 𝚌𝚊𝚗’𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎, 𝚒’𝚖 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗’𝚝 𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚗------𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞’𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏, 𝚠𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚘𝚔, 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚗𝚘𝚠.” he knows gunhak can’t understand him, but at this point, he’s past caring. he just needs to get this out. ———— @kghrk & @rkdongmin