I would LOVE to know your thoughts on Pillion, I managed to watch it last week, and ooof. It was so sweet, and at times really funny (sounds like a plan!), but also so sad and a little heartbreaking (the lack of communication and building resentment/Colin's self-esteem issues)
ughhhh what to say about this film. I have so so much to say but I'll put it under the cut for those who haven't seen it. so spoilers below !!
a mutual and I have talked a lot about how there aren't any fun films about kink, everything is pretty miserable - so the number one thing I loved about this film was the humour. even in the intensely dramatic moments there is a brilliant thread of comedy. both harry melling & alexander skarsgard play off each other's energy SO well - it's casting i don't think anyone could have seen paired up but it's brilliant. the final act (pre-fallout) is sooooo gorgeous. singing for the ladies with the meal deals makes me GRINNN.
i have also read box hill, the book on which the film is based, and I think it's such a brilliant adaptation of the material. the subtitle of the book is ‘a story of low self esteem’ which i think highlights pretty prominently the core of the story: colin's self worth is majorly increased by the dynamic he has with ray. he begins being so self deprecating that he can't even cook a pasta dish, he gains a community and group of people that make him feel empowered and eventually past that a sense of self and what he enjoys and wants from a relationship. (the whole sequence where he's being yelled at at work but has the confidence to walk right through it !!!) but the tragic undercurrent of the whole story is that the more confident he becomes the more he wants the dynamic to become a romantic relationship (and the more he feels comfortable expressing that), and ray pretty clearly doesn't allow himself that kind of emotional intimacy. this is not to say he's flawed for wanting it to solely be a D/s dynamic, but the story pretty clearly paints to us that he wants more as well, but retreats from it for whatever reason (kiss over hand over mouth you will live in my brain forever).
(not going to touch on it too much but the Discourse about harry mellings appearance is so fucking rotten in the head behaviour, not least because he's a man marginally outside of the realm of Hollywood handsome - which no-one can apparently cope with - but also because that's the whole point. they're supposed to be an odd couple. the fact that alexander skarsgard is there looking Like That and has chosen colin is the whole point. like. in the book he's fat too. you bitches are Weak.)
what makes this particular story SOOOOO compelling and one of my favourite aspects of the whole thing is colin's family. he has parents that love and support him and want him to be happy (even if they are a little overbearing). it's really refreshing to see a film where kink/a D/s relationship isn't incompatible with/doesn't isolate someone completely from their family. obviously there is humour and tension in the way his parents view the relationship, but the dinner scene and ray stating “thinking what you're uncomfortable with is what's not right for your son is close-minded” is not necessarily positioned as a truth. we're not completely on his side, neither are we on colin's parents. we're on colin's side.
and I know (although I haven't seen it. protecting my peace) that there will be Discourse about this being a healthy/abusive relationship or a “responsible” depiction of D/s dynamics, as there always is around movies about kink, and my overwhelming opinion is that it is a fucking good story, told very well. yes, the dynamic is wildly undernegotiated, (from what we see onscreen). it's also made pretty clear by the narrative that it is a somewhat unusual relationship. another sub talks to colin about how they could never not kiss their partner (one of ray's rules - though they are trying to sow dissent from a place of jealousy), and the other relationships/dynamics around them are shown as more openly affectionate than what ray lays out. it's obvious ray has hangups in being vulnerable and the extent to which colin is able to communicate what he wants is limited by both his own confidence and ray's boundaries. he dictates terms to colin from the start, and colin is interested and attracted enough to him and the dynamic to keep coming back, but there are obvious disparities in experience and power, which is kind of the whole point. we can see the cracks appear as we see them both outgrow the dynamic but colin becomes the one brave enough to voice it (“isn't love the whole point” “of what?” “of everything”). the way ray's walls slowly break down (sleeping in the bed, the tenderness of the sink scene, the day off. UGH) is soooo well pitched in that he's still not able to confront how he feels.
what i appreciate so much is how the adaptation does so many things to increase colin's agency. box hill takes place in the 1970s, so the surrounding context is one of illegality and homophobia, there's none of the supportive family as they appear in the film (though he does come out to his mum later in life and they have a lovely relationship). they meet on colin's 18th birthday (jinkies). they're also together for SIX YEARS as opposed to six months, during which time colin Never finds out what he does for work, or his last name. in the book, ray dies (or at least, so colin believes - but he's never told where he's buried and never has any confirmation of the fact). i think him disappearing with the implication that he just up and left is so much more compelling. i think giving colin a family and a life and an afterlife in the way the film does is brilliant, it really is about him and the ways in which his relationship with ray - however flawed and intense and unfulfilled in so many ways - has allowed him to grow and work out just what he values and is looking for from a partner going forward.
i think it's a beautifully complicated well drawn study of desire and power and intimacy and love and masculinity and fear and sex! from what I know the bikers are played at least in part by real members of the kink community! which is very cool! I've seen it twice in cinemas and will probably go again! I think it's brilliant filmmaking! yippee!
