#implied juddler

[flowerbloom-arts]

Technically my first full song lyric comic and I'm proud of it! Nothing Man by Sodikken is just so so fitting for Joxter I had to make this!

[cloudedvalley]

[zoomee-vroomee]

“Sit up, please.” Joxter dully followed the Muddler’s command, sitting upright on the couch that he’d claimed weeks ago. His hair was matted, his stomach rumbled with his hunger, and, quite frankly, he stunk. He’d just gone on another of his many weeks long sleeping stints and now the Muddler had to care for him. Well, he didn’t have to. Moomin and Hodgkins would have been perfectly fine taking turns caring for him, but he had to admit that he rather liked nursing him back into normalcy. It made him feel useful and, beyond that, he enjoyed having so much alone time with his friend, even if he wasn’t entirely aware of it. He quietly fed him spoonfuls of soup, occasionally having to remind him that he was hungry to get him to eat. He was gentle and patient with him in a way that the others wouldn’t have been able to be. He’d often forget what he was supposed to be doing or he may have just not cared and it could get frustrating at times. Not to the Muddler, though. He cared so very deeply for his Joxaren that it was hard for him to get frustrated with him and, even when he did, he couldn’t stay that way for long. If something actually bothered him, Joxter would knock it off immediately. This wasn’t something he could just stop, though. He’d admitted to that much before. When he finished with the soup, the Muddler asked for permission before leading him to the bath and undressing him, looking away when it came to his lower half. His friend wouldn’t have minded if he saw and it likely would’ve made things a bit easier, but Joxter wasn’t in his right mind, so he would respect him the same way he would when he felt normal. They never talked when he was being bathed. Instead, they both lost themselves in their thoughts to take away from the fact that they both sort of enjoyed it. The Muddler’s thoughts were a jumble. They didn’t follow a linear path the way Joxter’s would. It’d jump from thought to thought and back again, quickly making connections, but not quite registering them until a bit later. Anybody else would be overwhelmed if they had his brain. Right now, he was hopping between memories of his friend, forming some far off assumption about his actions. He’d rarely talk about what he was thinking and he often seemed to present an emotion different from the one he seemed to be feeling. After his long rests, he’d appear dull, but there had to be a lot going on in his head. His eyes would show that much. There was always just a hint of sadness in his expressions. Even when he was angry, there would be something in the way his brows would twitch or how his tail would go between his legs rather than sway with his agitation that would make his misery apparent. Even when the others didn’t notice - or refused to notice - the Muddler would always see it in him. The sorrow. The hopelessness. The- He dropped the soap into the tub, splashing water on himself and the surrounding floor. He almost reached in to find it, but he stopped just short of the water, realizing he didn’t want to accidentally touch something he wasn’t meant to. He didn’t need to grab it, anyway, as Joxter had found it for him. He quickly finished cleaning him up and got him dried and dressed, having him sit in front of him to comb his tangled hair. The connection he had made filled him with nothing but worry and anxiety. He should have noticed sooner. Maybe he hadn’t wanted to notice. The mere idea of his friend being so utterly miserable was one that he wanted to push away no matter how truthful it was.

How selfish. He took him in his arms and held him much closer than needed, though Joxter didn’t seem to mind. He actually enjoyed it, despite how it confused him. He could feel that this wasn’t just a product of the Muddler’s normal, affectionate self, but he was far too tired to question it. He held him like that for a long while, like he was afraid he’d lose him if he let go. He was afraid of just that because, he realized, his dearest friend was profoundly depressed.

[rotten-dandelions]

I really want to practice my drawing skills and what better way than to start with Joxter/Muddler?