#imthegodofbacon

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) where are youuuuuuuuuu

I’ve got a lot going on in real life, but I’ve been trying to write. I’ve also switched focus from ficlets to chapter fics, so that adds to me posting on tumblr less. 

I did get your prompt btw. I think I’m going to permanently switch to filling prompts in the ask responses, which is why I didn’t respond.

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) JJ, teenage Henry, "don't you pass out on me". Also did I send another prompt a while back?

A/N: Uhh... I somehow missed the “teenage” part of the prompt, and this happened instead. Sorry. :-\ You did send me a prompt before. It’s currently sitting in WIP stage with several other fics.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“Don’t you pass out on me,” JJ commanded. “Do you hear me, Agent Lamontagne? That’s an order from both your mother and unit chief.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Henry replied with a cough. He felt blood trickling down his chin and tried to ignore the desperation on his mother’s face.

His eyes fluttered close, but a surge of pain had them shooting open again.

“What the hell, Mom?” Henry grumbled.

He glanced down at his abdomen where his mother pressed her suit jacket into a gaping wound.

“Stay with me, Henry,” JJ pleaded, voice slipping from composed unit chief to terrified mother.

[wizardofahz]

CM: Drowning

A/N: @imthegodofbacon prompted JJ drowning and Hotch having to call Will, which fortuitously was a dream I had a while back, so this is just me writing down my dream. (And it’s still taken me forever to finish... sorry... >_<)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

They thought Kaplan was working alone.

It’s stupid in retrospect, JJ thinks to herself as Kaplan’s partner holds her head in the freezing creek and her attempts to fight back are limited by the bullet in her shoulder. The signs were there, but somehow the BAU had missed them. That’s on them. It’s gotten Detective Gonzalez killed, and JJ’s pretty sure Officer Janssen has bled out by now. Stupid.

Her thoughts are cut short as her struggling pays off. She gets a gasp of air before Kaplan’s partner shoves her injured shoulder into the rocky bank. Incapacitated by the spike of pain, her head’s pushed under once again.

Blackness encroaches on her consciousness. She tries not to let it take over.

It does.

...

Hotch skids to a stop beside JJ. He’s blown by Gonzalez and Janssen. He means no disrespect, but the local LEOs right behind him can tend to their bodies, confirm their deaths. His only concern is making sure that JJ isn’t dead. She can’t be dead.

He flips her body over. JJ’s lips are tinted blue -- she’s so cold -- but the more pressing observation is that she’s not breathing. Hotch immediately starts compressions. No one’s confirmed dead until they’re warm and dead.

Hotch’s steady rhythm of compressions belie his tumultuous thoughts.

One, two, three, four, another one bites the dust. No! Wrong song! So, so terribly morbid. Kaplan and his partner are long gone. Five, six, seven, eight, staying aliiiiiiive. Or at least, they’re not here now -- Nellie the Elephant packed her trunk and said goodbye to the circus -- and if they are, someone else can take charge of tracking them down.

His peripheral senses pick up people approaching.

“Hotch,” someone says above him. His name is repeated – more emphatically this time – and strong arms wrap around him to pull him away. It’s then that he realizes the voice belongs to Derek Morgan.

Still he struggles.

He only stops once he realizes the new arrivals include the paramedics who are working on JJ in his stead. He insists that he rides in the ambulance with her.

…

Hotch knows the verdict the moment he sees the doctor’s face. He lets her words fade into each other, wash over him, as the reality of the situation tries to sink in.

Silence falls as the doctor leaves. The team looks to him – for guidance, in sympathy, he doesn’t know.

Eventually Rossi offers, “I can call Will.”

“No,” Hotch responds quickly. He sees the way Rossi looks at him – hates the way Rossi looks at him like he’s fragile and needs to be handled – and takes a second to gather himself together. He repeats the word quietly, “No. I should do it.”

But what the hell is he supposed to say? I’m sorry for your loss? We did everything we could? We’ll get the sons of bitches who did this?

It occurs to him, and painfully so, that JJ would’ve been the person he’d turn to in a situation like this. JJ would know how to come up with something meaningful, some beautiful combination of words whose meaning hadn’t been worn down through repetition and could convey everything he feels and how genuinely he feels it.

It also feels cheap to try channeling JJ to the person who potentially knows -- knew -- her best in the world.

In the end, Hotch finds it easiest to convey his feelings with a fist through the wall.

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) ok I'll give you something easy before I challenge you. JJ somehow drowns in a stream/lake/river during a chase through woods. Hotch has to call Will and tell him what's happened.

Woah… Sometimes my dreams involve me watching various new tv episodes (all angsty and favorite character centric of course), and this is similar to an actual plotline that I dreamed?! How did you know…?

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) I got challenged to kill JJ (because no matter how much I torture her, I keep her alive) and I finally did it. So I'm gonna challenge you with fluff.

But killing JJ would be so much easier…

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) I LOVE IT! I also love that you included the native biscuit of my sunburnt country! Hahaha!

(imthegodofbacon) also, maybe I should challenge you to write fluff more often because that was too cute!

I’m glad you liked it!

I saw Tim Tams mentioned in some Anna Torv quote recently and got a bit nostalgic because I used to do Tim Tam Slams with one of my college roommates. Since you’re an Aussie, I figured I should run with my nostalgia and throw them in.

And NOOOOOOOO! Writing fluff seems so unnatural to me. Although I guess if I don’t keep trying I won’t get better at it. Meh.

[wizardofahz]

CM: Tim Tam Slams

A/N: @imthegodofbacon requested JJ and her teenage daughter having a girls day. Sorry this took so long. Writing fluff is far from my strong suit.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“Tim Tams!”

“What?”

JJ barely had the chance to get the word out before Stevie dragged her down the next aisle. The younger blonde crouched in front of the selection.

“Tim Tam Slams are the best! Caramel’s my favorite, but you should try all of them.” 

“What are you...” JJ trailed off as Stevie shoved packets into the basket JJ was carrying, already filled with hot cocoa, marshmallows, whipped cream, and the like. She regretted not getting a cart. “Do we really need all of these?”

“Yes, Mom,” said Stevie as she stood and proudly surveyed their haul. “You need to try all of them, remember?”

...

“Okay,” said JJ as she prepared their hot cocoa. “Now what are these Tim...” She trailed off, gesturing for Stevie to finish for her.

“Tim Tam Slams.” 

“Right, those. Are they something you learned about in school?”

“No, Mom,” said Steve, rolling her eyes. “I had them at Aunt Emily’s. Didn’t she tell you about them?”

JJ shook her head. Their drinks usually involved more alcohol.

Once the hot cocoa was poured into two mugs, Steve walked JJ through the basics.

“You bite opposite corners off.” Stevie demonstrated with her own cookie. JJ followed along. “A little bit more,” Stevie instructed, waiting until JJ did so before continuing, “And then you use it as a straw.”

JJ looked at her skeptically. “That’s it?”

“That’s it,” Stevie echoed, wanting to leave the rest as a surprise. “Try it.”

JJ dipped one bitten corner into her cup and sucked up the hot cocoa through the other end, surprised when it actually came through, the taste enhanced by the chocolate, melted biscuit, and filling from the cookie. 

Then suddenly the Tim Tam was melting in her hand. “Oh my God,” she blurted before quickly cramming the rest of the cookie into her mouth.

JJ’s shocked expression and the mess of melted chocolate covering her hands and mouth had Stevie laughing. 

“That was amazing,” JJ declared.

“Right?” Stevie grinned. “See why we need so many now?”

“Oh yeah. Give me a caramel one.”

[wizardofahz]

(imthegodofbacon) my other idea was something mother daughtery with JJ and her daughter. Fluffy not angsty. I'm really feeling the teen kid fics rn. I thought maybe first boyfriend, first period, or an 'I have to get braces??!?!?!?!' meltdown. Take your pick and roam free good friend!

You’re very consistent. That’s the second prompt you gave me last time. I will try to lay off the angst, “try” being the operative word.