starter for: @fclseconfidence | jeremiah & nadia. location: the train on the way to the capitol.
Nadia has spent the entirety of her life trying to blend in with the crowd, keep her head down and get her work done. It had done her well for the last six years -- She'd made it through the Reaping enough times to naively feel like she was safe. Even after her brother's death, and with the insurmountable pressure coming from her parents, Nadia couldn't help but feel as if fate was on her side. She should have known better. Really, it was stupid in hindsight. Her own brother died in the Games, and she still somehow thought it couldn't touch her. As if she could truly get through this unscathed, and live the rest of her life out on a fishing boat. Idiot.
The train ride is quiet, for the most part. At least, she is. The boy who was Reaped with her is talking up a storm, already trying to talk strategy and how to win. She knows him from the Academy -- Finn has a real shot at winning this. He's strong enough, practically twice Nadia's size and a foot taller than her. Part of her wonders if she should try and find a backdoor on the train, and jump out. Let herself get decapitated by a tree branch, and avoid the Games all together. At least then her death would be at her own hands, not by the Capitol or some blood-thirsty Tribute. Or maybe she'll become that blood-thirsty Tribute, the one who kills for sport and returns as another Capitol Darling. It's hard not to let herself drown in her own thoughts, give credence to every passing possibility. It's enough to make her head spin.
At some point in her spiraling, Finn's left and so has their Escort. Nadia's left to her own devices, continuing to push food around her plate as she avoids what's coming next. Jeremiah's sat across from her. Her mentor. The word is laughable, considering her family has slandered his name for the last three years, blaming him for her older brother's disgraceful ending. While her brother may be seen as a failure by her parents, Jeremiah might as well have pushed him into a coffin. Nadia doesn't have high hopes for any sort of mentoring -- She's already made her peace with the fact that she will probably be on her own the moment they arrive at the Capitol. She silently tries to go back through every bit of training she's received, call on any bit of knowledge she's got.
“I wouldn’t blame you if you let me die in there.” She’s not sure what possesses her to say that, but the words come out before she can stop them. Nadia holds eye contact with the strawberry she’s been stabbing with her fork for the last few minutes, not sure she has the mental bandwidth to do much more. “I mean, you know –” She finds herself adding, finally lifting her gaze to reluctantly meet her new mentor. “All things considered.” Might as well get it all out in the open now, than let it go unsaid. Especially if she may be beginning her death march.
