@corpserites, siobhan said: i have a sense that real life is happening somewhere far away, happening without me, and i don't know if i will ever find out where it is or become part of it.
SOFT EXHALE THROUGH HIS NOSE. remains leaned against the wall of the dance studio, eyes flicker briefly to where the children sit on the bench - chattering and waiting for their parents. watchful eye, always. but then his attention goes back to her, as it always seems to do these days.
hand inches towards her own, entangles his pinky around shiv's. mikey wishes he could better communicate his own existence. how his own existence is moot, since he doesn't know why/how/when/who he was created for. how he's meant to get busy living, now, he thinks - but is unsure how. mikey thinks he owes her that.
but he's not good at explaining his own existence, and isn't that good at verbal expression either. but again, he tries for her - he owes it to siobhan. moreso, he wants to. and he's never allowed himself to want before. it's not why he was created, right. get busy living.
"i think your life is real. just 'cause it looks different than other people ... doesn't make it wrong, or anythin'. or any less real. but i mean, i get it, sweetheart. i dunno what my own life even feels like. or is meant to be. but at least we can figure out real life together, yeah?"