#intercommunity issues

[intersexcat-tboy]

There was a tiktok video floating around twitter a bit ago. The very first thing I thought of when I saw the comments is that, at the core, they truly believe "men pretending to be trans to get off sexually" is a real thing that one should be concerned about. Sounds a lot like TERFs don't it?

There's so many different aspects to it. We can also clearly see "men invading women's/lesbian spaces" as a common theme. "Men think they're entitled to lesbians! Lesbians don't want you! You aren't a lesbian." Still sounding a lot like TERFs!

Loads of gender essentialism; saying that asking "who want me?" is a "man" thing to do (so what about the trans women I see asking where the trans men who want them are at? Does embracing your sexuality prove trans women are men, since they're doing the exact thing you claim is a man thing?)

I had one person respond that "it's cool when women do it", which is fucked up in many ways. So, it was cool for him prior to transitioning, and now since he's trans it's not cool? Do you hear how fucked up that is? Or the general sentiment said abt sexual harassment too, that it's fine when women sexually harass bc it's not as bad as a man right?

Not even touching on how the issue he made clear was the isolation and alienation for being masc. He wasn't saying "(wokely) if you don't sleep with me I'll KMS" it was "treating people with hostility makes them feel bad."

The saddest part is he was talking about cis people kicking him out of queer spaces

[our-queer-experience]

you do not need to know someones agab

you do not need to know someone’s genitalia

you do not need to know if someone is pre or post op

you do not need to treat gender and sex as opposite and irrefutable categories that determine anything about a person

you are not owed anything about a stranger’s body unless you are a doctor or in a situation where knowing what’s in someone’s pants is immediately relevant, like in a sexual context. it’s not appropriate to ask and you do. not. need. to. know.

[status-quo-hater]

I am not transmasc and I am not transfem. I am neither completely cis nor completely trans, because these words were not made to describe the lives of people like me. I am intersex and agender and experienced ISIG.

I experience certian struggles and oppression faced by trans men and by trans women, but I do not have a 1:1 experience with either. I am very much aware of when people from one group of trans people make false assumptions and assertions about another based on ideas not informed by lived-experience.

I see transmascs making transmisogynistic assumptions about the lives of transfemmes and I personally know that is wrong because of my personal experiences, so when I see that, I say something about it.

I see transfems make transandrophobic assumptions about the lives of transmascs and I personally know that is wrong because of my personal experiences, so when I see that, I say something about it.

This is in addition to listening to people when they speak on experiences I am not familiar with.

I think you all need to do a better job believing each other when you hear people start talking about the pain of living in cisnormative patriarchy. It's not a suffering contest.

There is a serious problem in the transfeminist movement regarding the belief that it is not only ok to ignore and dismiss trans men, but that it is transfeminist to do so, because they are men. Yes. We tell cis men to sit down and listen to women because they are priveleged and need to learn to awknoledge that privelege. But the thing is that isn't something you can just, map onto trans men, considering trans men are demonstrably not empowered to harm and granted privelege the same way cis men or cis women are. Transmasculinity is not a source of gendered privelege. Trans men and mascs are gender-marginalized and deserve to contribute to trans/feminist theory just as much as any other gender-marginalized group. The sheer dismissal of that fact is why I talk about transandrophobia so goddamn often despite this being a mainly intersex-focused activism blog.

[gingerswagfreckles]

Believe it or not I do in fact see right through attempts by secular Jews to pin the entire Israel/Palestine mess on Orthodox Jews and escape out the back door unscathed and believe it or not I will come at people with knives over this shit. People think because I won't shut the fuck up about being an atheist that I'll go along with that crap. Nope not me baby. Sorry to be a jerk off but you are barking up the wrong tree. I am consistent if nothing else and my opinions have absolutely nothing to do with whether I get along with you like at fucking all.

[adhdenbywitch]

I typically don't like vagueposting but if you really do believe that feminism, all forms of it is somehow more detrimental to trans people than the cis patriarchy which made feminism be created by a group of people who are affected by it, than it really does prove that your only experience with intercommunity issues and activism is here on Tumblr.

Also you have a fundamental misunderstanding as to how liberation movements work, because if you did have real understanding of it, then you'd know that all liberation movements have a group of a people who have awful ways of going about gaining that liberation and how they think about their oppression.

[viciouslyrobotic]

Its not trans fems we need to be taking issue with, its patriarchy and polarizing ourselves only serves that. Trans radfeminism is already a polarized ideology and we do not need to feed into it to have our criticisms of those perpetuating transandrophobia.

Its also been primarily folk like fite-club (fellow trans mascs) going abt being egregiously transmisogynistic and transandrophobic, too, and it should NOT escape our purview that trans fems like starryjoy, velvetvexations and intersex trans fems like impunkster-syndrome have been called fakers or straight up cis/trans men pretending to be trans women for speaking up and supporting us including the trans fem HARASSED INTO SHOWING ID for fighting alongside us. Intersex folk in general have ALSO been getting thrown under the bus and ran over repeatedly by the discourse on all sides and we shouldn't be doing that!

It not only trans mascs that are continuously sticking up for us against trans radfeminism! And they are getting hurt with us because this ideology hurts ALL of us bc trans radfeminism relies on transmisogyny, exorsexism, intersexism and transandrophobia to sustain itself. Please don't lose sight of that.

Also fite-club if u see this purchase some glass cleaner or better yet a mirror bc not a single one of us is a reflection for you.

[ratmans-notebooks]

you guys HAVE to figure out how to be normal about aroallos yes even if you are on the ace/aro spectrum yourselves !

[atypical-irritant]

So, the definition of a slur, according to Merriam-Webster, is "an insulting or disparaging remark or innuendo" or, according to the Oxford English dictionary, is "A term of abuse or contempt; esp. a highly offensive insult used to denigrate a person on the basis of race, gender, sexual orientation, etc."

Now, the definition of "theyfab", according to Wiktionary.org, is "(LGBTQ slang, derogatory, offensive) A non-binary person who was assigned female at birth, often one that does not change their physical appearance."

With all this nicely outlined, I think one could safely say that calling someone a theyfab, especially with the context that they're actively trying to talk down to and insult the other person based on their gender presentation, is calling them a slur. Bonus points for implying that being nonbinary is something worthy of being mocked or is in some way an illegitimate gender identity.

Admittedly, the word by itself is relatively tame, though incredibly rude. It's the way you use it that solidifies it as a slur. But if you're really not sure, try this: If you can swap the word out with a more common derogatory term and the sentence's intent and tone hasn't changed at all, chances are you're using a slur.

Call people whatever you'd like. I frankly couldn't care less what words people decide to throw at one another in a heated argument, but don't pretend you're completely innocent with that shit. We all know what you're intending there. The least you could do is own up to it.

Also, fuck you for the splash damage.