Pride Month🌈 for me
let‘s face it, if you‘re BI and in a relationship, you‘re either hetero bc you date a guy or you‘re lesbian bc you date a girl. I never had luck with women, my dude-rate was lower than my girl-rate, in fact I had the most heartbreaking moments with women, but I still don‘t feel like I belong. Yes, I‘m a cis woman and I feel comfy with that. I feel it‘s me. I‘m in the middle of my 30s tho so I gotta say it was a struggle from puberty. I never liked being a ‚woman‘, look really typically like a woman, have the features, being oggled by dudes bc of my looks. For a long time I felt uncomfortable. It took a lot of years and reflection to be at the point where I am. It took a lot of years to be happy with my feminine body and I feel like I really love it right now. I realized that all the struggles were the product of social constructs. I didn‘t want to be lesser or worse then men. I was a fighter and still am and the result was, that I really didn‘t like what was so feminine about me or in general. What made me change my mind was that I realized that women aren‘t any less or worse. They are lovable and it hit me. I can say that I love myself for who I am, how I look, even my extra pounds, and what I became over the last years. I changed and I gotta say I‘m proud of myself and I think these are my thoughts on Pride Month. I‘m sad because a lot of things changed in the past years, work, live, friends, but it‘s also an opportunity to start new things which match my present personality and not my old one. Everyone should think about their own Pride, bc I think that there are a lot if people out there who feel the same and are lonely or disconnected. Happy Pride Month~
