A Note to Aliens
Words of advisement to any and all extraterrestrial beings--if you decide to abduct me, PLEASE
Do it in broad daylight. Why would you even do that at night? That's terrifying. I do not cooperate with terrorists. And I'm going to be all sleepy and groggy and if you're interested in having some kind of conversation with me it's not gonna be a very productive one. If you just want to do experiments, on the other hand, isn't it a good idea to have a fair sampling of abductees from different times of the night and day to compensate for fluctuating hormones and Circadian rhythms?
Kindly wait until I have my glasses on. I can't see anything more than a handspan in front of my face without them.
TELL ME. Say hi. Be kind. Be polite. Engage in civil discourse. It would be terrible interstellar diplomacy to kidnap members of a contacted species. And again, if you're just doing experiments, don't scientists at least provide their animals with nourishment at least? (Tea would be nice. Or a pizza. Or something a little stronger in that tea.)
Thank you. Thatisall. Happy hovering, or whatever it is you and your UFOs do...