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medialog june 2k26
books
homer trans. emily wilson, the odyssey — i have to confess, and maybe this is part of why it took me so long to get around to it, there was a part of me that worried that maybe i wouldn’t like this, despite the fact that emily wilson’s translation comparison threads were both the only good thing on twitter and the closest i have come to feeling in adulthood the way i felt in my middle school latin teacher’s classroom (in case you’re wondering: yes, in retrospect, a little bit in a gay way) — that i would be too sentimentally attached to the grandeur of the fagles, that i would find her work a letdown aesthetically after finding her thoughts on her work so fascinating. happily i can now report: opposite!!!! reading this was a way to fall in love with the old story all over again, both through her wonderfully considered and artfully written introduction and through her translation, which felt very alive. (when i started i wasn’t sure i ever needed to do another iliad, but by the end i really wanted to read hers, and her new book of essays about translation has bumped it up the priority list for sure.) i really liked how clearly she articulated her own choices in the introduction, especially her note about the mix of centuries represented in homeric language and how it’s appropriate therefore for the poem to feel sometimes oddly modern and sometimes deeply remote. and the combination of blank verse and plainspoken language had the effect, for me, of making it feel almost like a bedtime story or a fairy tale, which feels fitting given that for many contemporary readers, our primary experience with oral storytelling is in childhood. i also am not totally sure if this was something the translation brought out for me or just a matter of reading it more than a decade after my last read-through, two and a half decades after my first, but this time i found myself really struck by what a physical poem it is — how one of its primary concerns is rendering, over and over, how good it feels to eat when you are hungry, to rest when you are tired, to bathe when you have been unclean — an artifact, i suppose, of originating in a world where even wealth and status were not ironclad protection against the elements, which is part of what allows it to continue to resonate today.
natan last, across the universe: the past, present, and future of the crossword puzzle — this book was so fun and cute!!! last (who, yes, is aware of how incredibly crossword-friendly his own name is) is a lifelong crossword enthusiast and professional cruciverbalist (crossword composer) who gives his book a much wider scope than you might expect with such a narrow topic, going historical with the puzzle’s origin in the crossword craze of the 1920s and literary with a chapter placing the crossword in the context of literary modernism; personal with recollections of his summer interning for longtime NYT crossword editor will shortz and political with discussions of the lack of diversity in crossword composition (along with examples of both the questionable clues that can result from said lack and efforts, institutional and collective, to ameliorate it); technological with a chapter on programs for designing and solving and aesthetic with one on art that uses or invokes crosswords and crosswords that use their grids as a kind of art. despite his own relationship with and clear affection for shortz, last is pretty clear-eyed about the editor’s blind spots and biases. and, as might be expected of someone with a passion so verbal and so, so nerdy, he writes with delightful verve and an infectious enthusiasm for his subject—so infectious that for the first time in years i found myself asking n., “hey, wanna do a crossword?” (for all of shortz’s issues, the NYT sensibility does remain irresistible to me when the mood strikes, so it’s lucky that the seattle times syndicates a week’s woth of NYT crosswords at a time for free.)
jenny slate, life form — i bought this book because i was visiting my friend at her new house upstate and back when we first met she loaned me slate’s little weirds so i thought it would make a nice little bookend gift. i think when i read little weirds i said something like “i don’t really know what it would be like to read this book if you’re not already in love with jenny slate but i am, so,” and, i mean, plus ça change… i simply cannot be impartial on this topic but if you’re In on her whole Deal, you will probably enjoy, as i very much did, watching her bring her whole Deal to the world of remarriage, pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. despite having no interest in having kids myself, i find myself drawn to people who write about parenting in a way that is simultaneously unsparing about the brutal physicality and total mindfuck of it and also bursting with love and joy, and, naturally, slate fits in this category. i also have to say that of course i understand logically that everyone has their own burdens and you really really really can’t tell from the outside of someone’s life what their emotional reality is like, but for some reason there’s a specific way that jenny slate writes about her anxieties and emotional struggles that actually makes that feel very real to me, although, again, that could be because i think she is the perfect woman and if even the perfect woman can be insecure then maybe it really just a common thread of the fabric of human experience.
susanna kaysen, girl, interrupted — kind of startled by how much i loved this. kaysen is a really good writer — she was a writer before she wrote an insanely famous book about being institutionalized, which feels important — sparing with her words but not dry, insightful and incisive with a clean, arch voice. the book is often funny, and sometimes devastating, and it works partly because kaysen plays the humor and the pathos in the same tone, curious and anthropological about sorting through her own memories and experiences. another thing i find myself drawn to, no doubt for reasons related to How Fucking Annoying The Whole Internet Is, is writing about mental illness that feels like it’s actively reaching for the right words to describe the experience — which, like, on the one hand that’s what writing is, but on the other hand most writing about mental illness aggravates me specifically because it feels like it is operating on received wisdom (even writing by people speaking in a first-person way about their own experiences), which bothers me for reasons both artistic and personal “lol.” anyway — this book came out in 1967 J/K I MIXED UP THE DATE OF HER INSTITUTIONALIZATION AND THE BOOK RELEASE LOL IT CAME OUT IN 1993 but the way kaysen grasped for language around her experiences felt fresh and therefore refreshing, and while there are many differences between her experiences and mine, i wound up feeling like i had really needed to read it, actually — for, now that i think about it, reasons both personal and artistic.
jonathan ned katz, the daring life and dangerous times of eve adams — of the books i was assigned excerpts from in the class i took in june (! see below for more of course), this was the only one i went the extra mile to finish completely, partly (i admit) because it’s short, but also because its subject was so compelling to me. adams was a polish jewish lesbian who immigrated to the US, ran in some of the same radical circles as emma goldman and alexander berkman (one of the major sources we have on her life is apparently an unpublished memoir about her by ben reitman, most famous to ME as Emma Goldman’s Iconically Toxic Hobo Doctor Boyfriend, which was a cameo i was NOT expecting and was thrilled by), traveled cross-country selling subscriptions to radical papers, opened up tearooms catering primarily to lesbians in chicago and new york, published a short book called lesbian love, was deported after a sting operation involving an undercover policewoman, and eventually died at auschwitz. she’s an obviously fascinating and compelling character with not much of a historical record, and the book is largely katz illuminating and providing broader historical context for what we know of her life based on what was left. he also includes the full text of lesbian love, which, with its 1925 publication date, is (in his account at least) probably the earliest known example of an explicitly pro-lesbian publication, and which is very, very endearing — it’s a series of sketches of women and couples, some sweet, others less so (suicide threats, jealous wives, gorgeous heartbeakers), but all written clearly with an intent to simply depict these women leading the same kind of lives as anyone. in one of her hearings, discussing her “obscene material,” adams said that she only wanted to help women and show them the truth of their lives — an impossibly moving goal.
jane gardam, the sidmouth letters — my favorite writer-with-a-newsletter talked up the title story in this collection so much that i, always on the lookout for short stories to assist me in shifting my self-image from “person who doesn’t get or like short stories” to “person with highly selective taste in short stories,” added it to the to-read list, and having read it, i’m very glad i did! as is usually the case, some stories are more successful than others, and there are a few “...huh, not sure about that” moments in terms of choices made, but i didn’t leave even the stories i liked less thinking, “ummmm what exactly was the point of that…” these stories are punchy — some even have a real proper “punchline” at the end in a sort of old-fashioned way that i feel like is now considered too obvious to be respectable but that IMO we should really consider bringing back — and they’re also impressively dense without ever feeling it. gardam manages exposition and insight and character so deftly, with such a light touch, that you feel each time like you’ve been dropped into this fully realized little corner of the world, and it’s only when you start to think about it that you realize how expertly she constructed that illusion. expertly crafted but also i finished this book and was like, “is the concept of craft actually a huge scam?” (and yes — the title story in particular is absolutely a fucking banger.)
movies
one hour with you — our most recent stop on the tour of early lubitsch musicals is unfortunately the only total dud we’ve found in the bunch… i don’t know what happened here. it’s a romantic comedy with no chemistry between the leads and hardly any jokes; the pacing is leaden and the gender of it all is oppressive (it’s possible i just found it harder to compartmentalize because the movie was bad, but also there’s a song called “trimmin’ the women”... like it’s rough.) ah well. even homer nods! LOL PART 2 i fully just like forgot everything about this movie and just rereviewed monte carlo........ ummm this one is ok but CLEARLYYYYY not very memorable, as compared to the memorably bad monte carlo lmao.
carolina caroline — very tropey southern neo-noir romance where every beat will feel familiar but it’s all tropes i like and it looks pretty good and has good performances (one from kyle gallner aka cassidy “beaver” casablancas of veronica mars fame!!!!) so i had a nice time. recommended with tempered expectations if you like scenes where people explain to other people the logistics and psychology of conning, criminal road trips that are all fun and games until someone goes too far, etc. i really must emphasize that you have to actively like these things, like if you’re not actively hyped to think “yay the part where he teaches her how to run a two-person con :)” there’s not much for you here. i did think it needed like six fewer thematically appropriate needle drops.
the talented mr. ripley — this movie has THEE most turn-of-the-millennium miramax opening credits of all time, omg. and things more or less continue apace being european, lavish, tawdry, etc. i think this is probably the best performance i’ve ever seen from matt damon which is saying a lot because he is outclassed by every single other person in the cast so hard it’s crazy. gwyneth perfectly cast as the good girl, cate blanchett & (especially!) philip seymour hoffman predictably scene-stealing every time they show up (PSH really was one of those actors whose every performance feels like he just wandered on set that day and made everything up on the spot in the best way possible), jude law legitimately extremely good in a way where revisiting this, a movie i admittedly last watched in high school as a double feature with y tu mamá también with the theme of “movies in which my friends and i had heard you could see a dick,” made me wonder if maybe his outrageous good looks have counted against his reputation as an actor, because he’s wonderfully magnetic and insufferable here. and, i mean, also, yes, jude law in the talented mr. ripley is like the most beautiful a human person has ever looked and i don’t even mean that in a sexual way, blonde british men are not really my thing as a rule, i mean he looks like he should be painted by one of the big renaissance guys or like maybe he already was and then a witch cast a spell to bring that painting to life. you see him in this film and your brain fills in “adonis.”
screwball — once again i managed to convince people to watch the 2018 documentary about the MLB juicing scandal that is in large part an extended monologue by the fake doctor — sorry, unlicensed physician (to nod to one of the funniest parts of the movie) — that prescribed A-Rod steroids and is really above all things a meditation on florida as an unfixable swamp of venality and crime, and guess what: it was a hit, because this, my favorite documentary of all time, a nonfiction film i have seen at LEAST five times and enjoyed as much every single time, is an irresistibly wild ride. kind of a tough movie to rec because it can be hard to find — it left whatever rando streaming service it was on right before our movie night lmao and we wound up getting a physical copy from the queens library — but if you can see it, i simply must insist you do. no one who has ever followed this rec from me has ever regretted it!
disclosure day — i was hyped to see josh o’connor, everyone’s boyfriend, make it to the big leagues by starring in a spielberg joint, but unfortunately this was genuinely and sincerely one of the worst movies i’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing. i’m still in disbelief over how bad the screenplay was… it’s the kind of thing where i don’t even know where to start criticizing it because it’s just so bad on, like, EVERY conceivable level? all the dialogue is corny and hacky and clichéd line-to-line, structurally the whole thing is a big mess, absolutely no one feels like a real character except a teensy tiny bit emily blunt’s chipper weatherwoman with a dream, who is given shadings of a personality-like thing and brought to life by a genuinely wonderful blunt but also who spends most of the movie (as n. pointed out) more or less saying “i have to do this now because the plot is telling me to.” the movie is wall-to-wall moments that feel like they want to be poignant and impactful mic-drops, but because they literally without fail come out of nowhere, you’re just left with the sense of being yelled at by someone you just met. foreshadowing? we don’t know her. seeding character work to pay off in character moments? never heard of the boy. speaking of gendering for no reasons, this is also a movie where the girl superpower is feelings and the boy superpower is math. i’m not making this up, josh o’connor (seemingly directed to play his character as a virginal boy scout, which is the absolute WACKEST thing you could cast this guy for and i say that full well knowing he recently played a literal PRIEST — like why would you cast one of our most swagful actors and then tell him to de-juicefy himself? offensive tbh) has the language of all math ever implanted in his brain while emily blunt has the ability to get past the bad guy by reminding him of his dead wife. literally that’s what happens in the movie. it’s so boring and a million years long and even the action scenes can’t muster any interest because every character is such a cipher it’s impossible to care about them at all. bad!!!! really bad!!!!
tv
wonder man — what can i say? wonder man is literally good. it’s so good it almost feels like marvel sort of knew that the disney+ experiment was over and this was going to flop no matter what so they were like, yeah, sure, do whatever. include a prolonged sequence centered on the iconic gay tragedy midnight cowboy which, having watched the series, i can now say is also a sweetly thematically relevant choice. make a whole episode about the horrors of self-taping. throw in a joke about paul thomas anderson’s surf instructor. why not? this really is a hollywood show more than it is a superhero show, and to the extent that it is a marvel show, that manifests mostly in how seriously it takes as a human and as an actor the wonderful character of trevor the fake mandarin from iron man 3, played by ben kingsley finally able to bring not only the wonderful comic timing we’ve seen in previous trevor appearances but also a genuine human tenderness and pathos to the role. our other lead is simon (played equally beautifully by yahya-abdul mateen ii, about whom i’ll say that seeing him actually get to flex in this made me mad about HBO watchmen all over again), a struggling actor with genuine talent and an inability to stop getting in his own way, and, again, it’s just amazing how much this is a show about a guy who really thinks he has the talent to make it but has not received any external confirmation of that yet, and what an insane and devastating and hopeful and stupid and brave position that is for a person to choose to remain in. the show even manages to come up with an in-universe reason for why simon’s special non-acting talents must stay hidden that feels cohesive with what the show overall is saying about the perils of hollywood (not least of all in the fact that it ultimately comes down to studio fears of liability) and also features a career-defining performance by josh gad as himself. all that and it’s also just a nicely executed bit of dramatic clockwork: you have two characters who each have their own goals, and then they meet and as their relationship develops it complicates those goals. good reliable stuff! it’s literally good. if it sounds even a little like the kind of thing you might like, i think you should give it a try.
mare of easttown — after being unexpectedly taken by task, brad inglesby’s follow-up to this breakout hit, i decided to finally watch it, and guess what i liked it a lot too. as with task, inglesby is not interested in reinventing the wheel; he’s taking beats we like and just working to execute them really, really well. he gets in all the familiar procedural pleasures while making his characters feel like real people with lives before we as viewers met them, their relationships lived-in and stretching back decades, and he finds great actors all the way down the call sheet to really make them feel alive. (it also helps that he’s quite good at managing exposition without info-dumping.) i think in some ways task was maybe a little more ambitious (and it made better use of his habit of writing children who are slightly too well-spoken, something which doesn’t really impact task’s animal-loving angelic kidnapping victim but does mar a critical scene or two here a bit), but to be totally blunt i enjoy the tropes mare is built on more (dead teenage girl, troubled ladycop with complicated relationships, an unexpectedly criminal minds style turn). this show did make me wonder if cool lesbian daughter of mom protagonist is becoming a new trope because the daughter here felt like in some ways she served a similar function as the daughter in babygirl, which is not a bad thing, just interesting to look out for. i laughed when chris ryan on the watch pod compared watching kate winslet act in this to watching lebron, but also he’s literally right. she’s so good it’s like almost boring to talk about because duh obviously kate winslet is one of the greatest to ever do it, but she really is extraordinary, the rare actor who possesses undeniable leading lady charisma and magnetism while functioning like a character actor. like it’s so crazy that she was in titanic, one of the most seen movies of all time, and also in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and therefore incredibly significant and formative in my own artistic autobiography, and yet watching her in this show my brain really was like, that’s not kate winslet, that’s some lady from pennsylvania. incredible work.
music
my listening patterns have been very podcast-skewing lately but for a song hmmm here’s a demo(?) collab(?) from folk-adjacent meadow talks, who continues to successfully cross the inarticulable but very real folksy line between snoozy and serene:
MUNA, dancing on the wall — fun enough to listen to although has not felt particularly special to me. i like it when they do “we didn’t start the fire” for queer millennials tho
vanessa carlton, veils — i always find the idea of being a late career vanessa carlton stan appealing but unfortunately in practice she keeps putting out albums that remind me of my least favorite of the first half-dozen tori amos albums.
pitou, p2 — very artful but not for me
deluxe tracks from the beaches, no hard feelings and maisie peters, the good witch — the beaches tacked on an all-filler no-killer trio of drippiness to their pretty good album; skip it and stick with their g-flip collab LEZ GO, which is dumb in a fun way. meanwhile, looking up these extra bops from maisie’s second album bummed me out all over again about her own descent into drippiness for her third. “the last one” is so good!
grace ives, girlfriend — this was pretty and sometimes fun! i feel like it’s one of those that started off really well or had a great song early and then i kept wanting to like it but maybe it fell off a bit… but tbh as mentioned i haven’t been listening to my current faves list that much lately so i need more time with it.
sorry, COSPLAY — this one on the other hand i kept saving because i was like, maybe it will grow on me, but i sort of knew at the time i was lying… in the realm of indie rock but too arty and experimental for my taste by a lot
heavenly, highway to heavenly — has a lot of the same ingredients as stuff i like but suffers from a case of terminal britishness that alas makes it a non-starter for me personally
katelyn tarver, tell me how you really feel — not bad in the realm of, like, singer-songwriter stuff where you’re like, is this country-inspired…? but mostly not for me although i saved a few songs
dina ögon, människobarn — undeniably well produced but too mellow and low key for me
olivia rodrigo, you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love — as somewhat of a rodrigo skeptic, i liked this a lot better than i expected! her ballads still do nothing for me and were such an instant delete i can’t say anything else about them, but i enjoy pretty much all the upbeat songs, and “stupid song” in particular is almost definitely gonna earn a place high up on my spotify wrapped. i think that the jangly dreamy cure-inspired thing she’s doing works much better with her voice and singing affectations and vibe than trying to bring back riot grrrl ever did (although the robert smith collab is sort of bafflingly bad). every time dan nigro throws a guitar solo in there i’m like “lol, okay sure” but, again, i can’t really argue with how catchy i find the bops on this one — after i first listened to the album i had snatches of songs stuck in my head for days. nicely done! but maybe consider starting an actual band!
of montreal, aethermead — of montreal was always one of those bands i wanted to like more than i did because of how obsessed my friends were with them (except for “the past is a grotesque animal” which i have genuinely always loved), and, well, still true. i kind of liked the sonic scuzziness of “take the form” though, and also the unapologetic dirtbaggery of “when.”
slayyter, WOR$T GIRL IN AMERICA — fun enough to listen through but didn’t feel particularly special or memorable to me
other
indian princesses @ the rattlestick theater — a friend of mine recommended this play and i loved it so much i wound up very sad that i had seen it on the second to last night so i couldn’t pass the recommendation on to anyone else i knew! playwright eliana theologides rodriguez drew on her experience participating in the YMCA’s father-daughter “indian princesses” program to tell a story about a group of girls of color with white dads that was funny, lovely, heartbreaking, uncomfortable, and wise. the cast was stellar across the board but i have to highlight specifically the girls, because as someone who has spent a lot of my adult professional life working with children i was truly, truly amazed at how the adults playing these nine-to-twelve-year-olds embodied the specific energy and awkwardness of children. like, there’s a scene where one of them cries and i was like holy shit, that literally is how kids cry!!! huge credit goes here to rodriguez, too, because this was maybe the best rendering i’ve EVER seen of the rhythm of the dialect of childhood in fiction — i was really, really blown away. (to give an idea, i sort of knew we were in good hands when one of the girls, in the first scene, said something like, “i’m nine, and i’ve been doing indian princesses since i was eight.” iykyk but that’s literally it!) i also have to say that the play perfectly captured the feeling of realizing the conversation you’re having with a kid is about to get a lot deeper than you were mentally prepared for, and also the feeling of leading a questionably designed after school program and watching the day’s activity descend into chaos. i hope i get to see something by rodriguez again.
queer new york before stonewall @ the brooklyn institute of social research — i first heard about BISR a few years ago but scheduling and timing and finances had never quite worked out for me to actually take one of their month-long classes for adult nerds, but after after realizing that this year i could actually swing a session in june, i obviously saw the class title and basically said, gimme. the class was very cute and fun and i had fun being assigned PDFs to read in a somewhat structured fashion by someone really knowledgeable in their field and getting to talk about them without having to do any actual work in the form of papers etc. there was something very satisfying about completing this short little arc of learning! and i was very happy to “meet” a wide variety of queer historical figures, many of whom i had never heard of before (one of whom i had and was delighted to come across: WAS NO ONE GOING TO TELL ME ALICE DUNBAR NELSON DATED WOMEN? —i recognize this means none of you because none of you had a college professor you loved who was very interested in the black women’s club movement but i could not believe she was showing up here!). the professor was also very awesome and i would definitely take another class with her in the future (although the part two of this class she’s planning is in november, so… not sure i’ll be able to swing the timing work-wise sobsob). some brief impressions on the books we read excerpts from (in addition to the jonathan ned katz book on eve adams described above):
jen manion, female husbands: a trans history — this book was very controversial due to manion’s decision to consistently use “they” for the figures in the book who fall under the titular category (i think manion’s reasoning makes sense and is sort of helpful for being constantly reminded that we are discussing an entire framework and context and set of meanings for gender that are not our own). extremely interesting and also tbh just plain fun topic, focused at least partly on my beloved nineteenth century. i did find the writing sometimes a little poorly organized, which is the kind of critique i have only recently allowed myself to make of academic writing lol. i want to say i’ll read this but realistically i don’t know if i’ll get around to it.
hugh ryan, when brooklyn was queer — this on the other hand was pure deliciousness and is absolutely going on the list even though (as the class professor agreed with me) the author gives short shrift to emily roebling’s contributions to the completion of the brooklyn bridge
snorton, c. riley, black on both sides: a racial history of trans identity — about 5 billion percent too theoretical and psychoanalytic for me
yochelson, bonnie, et. al, too good to get married: the life and photographs of miss alice austen — respectable monograph if you want to know more about rich staten island lesbian and amateur photographer alice austen; i was glad to learn of her but don’t feel particularly curious to read beyond what we already did, although i would like to visit her house one of these days
chauncey, george, gay new york: gender, urban culture, and the making of the gay male world, 1890-1940 — i’ve been meaning to read this for yeeeeeears and i still ammmmm and am at least happy to have learned that it totally slaps. one of the best “history is so weird and unexpected” moments came from this in the form of the columbia student slumming it to be gay in poor neighborhoods, which was a fascinating little reversal to read from our vantage point of the era of the boogeyman of the woke college kids with their blue hair and pronouns
saidiya hartman, wayward lives, beautiful experiments — the subject matter of this book is SO cool and interesting but i don’t know that i love hartman’s style of narrativizing
cookie woolner, the famous lady lovers — another one that i realistically will not seek out and finish but i did love what we read from this one, and not just for alice dunbar nelson reasons
kaier curtin, “we can always call them bulgarians”: the emergence of lesbians and gay men on the american stage — i found the two chapters we read of this RIVETING (should i be reading more theater history?) but it sort of gives the vibes of a book that exists only in the libraries of certain universities… if i turn out to be wrong though i may well add it to the list because it’s very readable.
this class also clearly took up a good chunk of my reading time which is why i wound up reading NO novels in june and why consequently i am pivoting to only novels july!!!
the jack kirby way: how a boy from the lower east side became the king of comics & jews are magic: occult practices from palmistry to professional psychics @ the center for jewish history — two small but very cool exhibits about which i do not have much to say as they kind of did what they said on the tin but which i was very happy to visit with some friends even though it brought us to the peculiar ghost town that Chelsea But Not Where The Parade Currently Is becomes if you happen to go there during pride, lol. some kirby pics:
variation on a post i have made before and will in all likelihood make again: sometimes what with the combination of lifestyle changes and helpful supplements and generally being less crazy and so forth i'm like, did i ever actually have ADHD? then i do things like (1) realize i am too low on yogurt to finish the overnight oats i was making, go to the store to buy more yogurt, come back, spend five minutes looking for the yogurt container that was not actually empty because i didn't leave it in the fridge (sane person place to leave it) or on the table (wrong but logical), then discover that i put the whole thing in the sink???; or, for an example from the exact same period of time, come home from a different errand and realize from the bright shock of hot pink in my periphery that i have left my sports bra on the little bar on the oven where a normal person would put a dish towel. and this is literally on like a normal high functioning brain feels smooth day. so.
beach day good i am pleasurably beached out :)
haircut btw
medialog may 2k26
books
susannah cahalan, the great pretender — in her twenties, cahalan developed psychosis that turned out to be caused entirely by an autoimmune illness no one checked her for until very far into her illness. the memoir she wrote about this and the world (of researchers, doctors, etc.) that book’s publication connected her to led her to the famous study about the normal people who went into a bunch of mental hospitals presenting as experiencing aural hallucinations and then had a difficult time getting out. cahalan was intrigued by this study because of her own experience of being treated completely differently, and with much more respect, once her condition was seen as “physical” rather than “psychological,” and her attempts to learn more about it and its author, documented in this book, ultimately led her to the conclusion that the study never really happened as described and much to all of the data was fabricated. this is kind of an interesting case of a book that debunks something (not 100% conclusively, as she freely admits, but IMO compellingly) but in a way that doesn’t really like… reveal anything to be actually the opposite of what this false study has led us to believe? two of the major contentions of the study—that the health system stigmatizes and dehumanizes people with psychiatric diagnoses, and that the diagnostic criteria for psychiatric conditions are subjective and not reliably applied—remain pretty undeniably true. but it is an interesting trail (or non-trail) to follow, and while nothing here will be super new for people with even a passing interest in psych history stuff, i did enjoy reading it. (at some point i got excited because marshmallow study guy showed up and i was like OMG MARSHMALLOW STUDY GUY and the person i was telling this to was like, …what, and i remembered that while my knowledge comes mostly from non-scholarly books and new yorker articles i do in fact qualify as slightly more interested in this field than most people.) i also vibed with her perspective as someone critical of psychiatry as practiced but also keenly personally aware of the potential for biology to cause psychiatric symptoms (my own much less traumatic and intense version of her brush with psychosis, as i’ve mentioned before, is the fact that i developed what in retrospect almost certainly qualifies as an anxiety disorder in high school that went away overnight when my thyroid levels were adjusted, which has certainly shaped my perspective). i might read her memoir because she’s a reasonably capable writer and, well, that is a very interesting harrowing experience she had!
jeanette winterson, frankissstein — my first winterson because someone i know recommended it and i was like, why not… i LOVED this book. on paper it sounds kind of hokey, maybe: the story of mary shelley, beginning with the fateful trip to rainy lake geneva, intertwines with a contemporary narrative in which a trans doctor named ry shelley carries on an ill-judged affair with a mad scientist named victor, in a story that weaves in across the timelines AI, gender, embodiment, etc. but i loved winterson’s writing so much that i was totally swept away—atmospheric, rich even when writing in plain language, funny (some parts of the book, especially involving a loose lord byron reimagining who runs a sex doll company, are VERY funny), poetic but not overwrought, sharp… just a sheer unputdownable pleasure to read, start to finish! it’s hard to wrestle with so many hot button topics without coming across as corny, but winterson is interested in resonance and questions unanswered more than arguing for some kind of conclusion, which is IMO what a novel is good for… i also liked how seriously the book told the nigh-unfathomable series of tragedies that mary shelley’s life became in the years after frankestein. you can tell i really loved it because it ends with the kind of weird mysterious ending i usually don’t like but in this case it really worked for me, because so much of the book is about capturing the emotional tenor of a historical moment that feels so much on the precipice of something, so unresolved… ahhhh just delicious. will absolutely be reading her again.
kory stamper, true color: the strange and spectacular quest to define color—from azure to zinc pink — as a huge fan of stamper’s word by word: the secret life of dictionaries, which i am constantly recommending to anyone who likes language, i was soooo excited that she had a new book out and it fully delivered on my very high expectations! i’m not going to summarize the whole history of the challenge of defining color names in merriam-webster and elsewhere, but some highlights for me were: (1) the fascinating unavoidable tension between various scientific schema for defining or mapping colors and the real-world usage of color names by everyone who is not a color scientist of some kind; (2) the chaos added by the era of mass-produced colorful items and mass-mailed catalogues, which created massive volumes of attestations for color name usage that were tainted by the fact that advertisers chose color names based on their presumed appeal; (3) a secret collaborator wife reveal. plus, of course, stamper’s playful style, droll sense of humor, and wonderful ear for cadence remain as delightful to spend time with as ever. yay!
patrick radden keefe, london falling: a mysterious death in a gilded city and a family’s search for truth — this book is craaaazyyyyy and while the story it spins out doesn’t feel as Consequential as the other stories he’s opted to turn into full length books… it’s, like, really really crazy so i didn’t super mind. as far as big issues raised here, i would say that apparently england is not the place to live if you want to piss off a russian oligarch, and this book made me think a lot about how crazy parenting is because, i dunno, i know obviously we only get the perspective of this dead kid’s parents but it really is hard to understand how anything about his upbringing could have led him to be troubled in the specific way he was troubled (constant bizarre lying and an obsession with becoming rich), and that feels to me like it’s almost as sad as his actual death.
virginia woolf, mrs. dalloway — reread, still and forever one of the true true greats of my life, as gorgeous and human and alive as a novel has ever been. lends the most ordinary and mundane aspects of human existence a grandness and importance near the level of myth, which is to say that it accurately captures what human existence is like in the privacy of our own minds. just sublime, what is there even to say? woolf’s rhythm is unsurpassed. in eleventh grade rezia made me feel seen so specifically i will never stop being grateful for it. i read the norton library edition and for once actually read both introduction and endnotes (after i’d read the text, partly as a way to relive it again), both by merve emre, and i found them interesting and enjoyable, particularly for the well-selected biographical bits and diary excerpts pertaining to the writing of dalloway and other pertinent topics.
belle burden, strangers: a memoir of marriage — i enjoyed this reading this book. was my enjoyment retroactively dampened by recent revelations in the new yorker that burden never got quite as close to actual financial precarity as she might make it seem? …honestly, no lol. i don’t think knowing that she had a bunch more trusts (some of which it seems like she can’t access, anyway?) really takes away from the emotional devastation of what her ex-husband did, given that we’re already working with an abandonment that literally took place in martha’s vineyard, a short walk from their private beach. also, if you’re exaggerating your financial situation in a way that opens up real conversations about women, marriage, and financial literacy, i’m like… that’s a net positive for society, actually. i think most people who have bounced on this book bounced on it because of how cartoonishly wealthy she is, but i know for me, and i find it hard to believe i’m alone in this, her loving descriptions of the absurd luxury around her at all times were, honestly if a little guiltily, part of the appeal! sorry to belle burden that i found a thread of escapism in your memoir of your harrowing divorce. while reading this book i kept thinking of the crazy ex-girlfriend song “let’s generalize about men,” specifically the line “let’s get super lit and not admit this is some kind of primal ritual we need now and then,” because i do think another part of the book’s appeal is that there’s something weirdly relaxing and cathartic about reading a book where you just get to think Kill That Man over and over uncomplicatedly because he’s being just so unmitigatedly and inexcusably terrible but not in a way that will ever impact your life at all. i also think burden is in fact a good writer and because i empathize with her creative wound of giving up fiction because of one douchebag guy in undergrad i am rooting for her to continue following her bliss and do more writing even if i also find it hard to imagine that someone so rich could really ever have an interesting thought unrelated to her horrible ex-husband.
cindy east, grown-up orthodontia: steering myself normal — amply discussed already lol. better than i expected, but badly in need of some serious edits. wish her the best!
rachel cusk, outline — we have that rare thing here: a book i don’t really have any criticisms of that i nonetheless totally hated. i think cusk is a good writer and the novel achieves the goals it sets for itself, and the goals it’s setting are such that questions like “do this many people really launch into monologues containing their entire life story over and over” are not really relevant or meaningful, but i found no pleasure in it whatsoever. her prose is elegant and clean and her ear for rhythm is good and her eye for images is skillful and yet i never once felt i was encountering anything like beauty in her words. it’s technically impressive i guess(?) that she constructs a protagonist almost entirely through negative space, but i did not enjoy watching her do it or feel that the exercise brought me as a reader anything of value. reading this it was very clear that miranda popkey’s topics of conversation was hugely influenced by it, but i liked popkey’s book much better and i found that the occasional ways she built her narrator more directly were effective and also that the character she opted to construct was such that by the end of the book it made a lot of sense thematically for her to tell the reader her story primarily through conversations and observations. i guess i could sit and come up with a reason for that to be true of cusk’s narrator as well but i don’t care enough to do so!
movies
the smiling lieutenant — our journey through the early lubitsch musicals continues! this was definitely the best of the three i had seen to this point (and remains the best now that i’ve seen a fourth). the three leads are all adorable and charming, the jokes are good, the energy is mischievous and cheeky in a fun way, we don’t run into too many gender problems… the only problem is that claudette colbert’s character is too lovable and delightful, so the ultimate happy ending didn’t quite land because i was so sorry to see her go, although i guess the fact that things turn out the way they do perhaps suggests a reading in which what’s really happening is that she is now free to go and find someone less boneheaded than maurice chevalier’s character… plus her final scene is basically her giving miriam hopkins as a sandy-in-grease makeover, which is one of those politically problematic tropes i go smooth-brained and happy for because of my lifelong love for grease.
a new leaf — my final unseen elaine may movie has now been seen! this is a very odd movie about a trust fund idiot with no redeeming qualities who has wasted all his money and decides his only option is to marry a wealthy woman and then murder her. it’s also kind of a romcom? my first thought has become my lingering thought, which is that this movie should not work as well as it does. i’m not totally sure it totally does work, but it really shouldn’t work at all, so the fact that it does even a little bit is impressive… there is a moment near the end of strange, prickly sweetness that should feel unearned and bizarre but totally worked on me through the magic of the movies. it helps that elaine may herself is very adorable as a hapless heiress with a passion for botany. i have to give a shout-out as well to the guy playing the butler, who steals the show in every scene he’s in, and the guy playing the… bank person? financial advisor? i don’t know what kind of jobs rich people come into contact with… anyway he has a line reading early on that made me laugh so hard i’m still thinking about it.
sirāt — i would say i am equally open to the argument on the one hand that this is a profound meditation on morality and mortality and the journey of the soul that i am too unsophisticated and weak-minded to appreciate it, and on the other hand that it is jerkoff provocateur bullshit trying to shock the viewer into believing it has something to say; people on the internet have made both of these capably! based solely on my viewing experience i would say it was well-made and the soundtrack slapped and it had some great desert visuals and also i did not super care or find myself thinking about it after watching it with a friend.
tekkonkinkreet — someone in the movies groupchat dropped the info that this was briefly screening last weekend and thinking a sunday night seeing an anime movie with some pals seemed like a nice relaxing end to the week i jumped in. i liked it! the animation is SUPER cool, with a distinctive, deliberately clunky style to the characters that is interestingly mesmerizing in front of the lush, hyper-detailed backgrounds, and the use of radically different, often messier styles to set off certain perspectives or key moments… i don’t keep up with or actively seek out anime but whenever i encounter it i am always confronted with my secret inner weeb in that visually i do just Like Anime, like i enjoy the style(s) and the visual language of it, i find it pleasing and compelling to watch the way it moves. the story, about two orphaned street kids in a troubled city, is a little flabby in a way that made sense when i learned it was adapted from a multi-volume manga — i personally could have used about 80% less time with the mob guys — but the core relationship between the two brothers trying to save each other in different ways is painful and sweet and was enough to keep me caring, and i found the ending quite lovely.
music
for a standout single this month, here’s a strange and hypnotizing six-and-a-half minute beauty from the first band on the listening list below, which as of this writing has 21 listens but only because i’ve only listened on spotify:
weird mirror, extant singles — one of you recced this band (via tags that have me erring on the side of anonymity), a small number without a full album yet but in the process of developing an interesting, sometimes haunting, often lovely sound. “everything” is their best so far for sure but their work as it exists so far has me ready to follow them to see what comes next.
lølø, god forbid a girl spits out her feelings — this album is like the platonic ideal of z-list spotify pop… a lil pop-rock but nothing too loud, a teeny tiny country influence if you squint that disappears if you’re not listening to it, lyrics that are confessionalish and peppered with details (“the devil wears converse”) that are all fine but never startle or intrigue, melodies that sound good when you’re listening and then evaporate from your brain, a vocal performance that’s pretty enough but does little interpretation… every song is technically good but nothing is great; it’s easy to like but sort of impossible to imagine anyone loving.
kid sistr, american teenage prophecy — was initially disappointed with this 5-song EP because i always want this sporadically-releasing band to live up to how much i liked their early namesake song (“little sister song”), but it’s been a shuffle-listening grower as i keep hearing songs from it and liking them enough to check the title/band and being surprised it’s this band, so… soft rec!
pina palau, you better get used to it — i thought this was going to be too sleepy and artful for me but then around the second or third song the texture of the recording clicked the sound into place for me and i wound up really liking it! it sounds lovely but also just unpretty enough to have kind of an interesting grain, if sound can have a grain… i dunno, it feels very physical to listen to in the way that films from the 70s feel physical to watch.
daisy grenade, so much to say — daisy grenade remains a reliable provider of excitable pop punk steeped in hooks with a sugary snarl, like what if early paramore snorted a bunch of pixie stix (or as dave once said, what if skye sweetnam cursed). my highlight from their latest EP is probably “emily,” a funny song about trying to mend fences that definitely broke for a reason or several.
tori amos, in times of dragons — much like the rest of the past decade’s tori albums in that it’s produced quite beautifully and her piano-playing remains lovely to listen to, but the lyrics are thuddingly obvious and the melodies are endlessly meandering without anything to grab on to. however i like “fanny faudrey,” a cute little ditty about a rebellious woman of old.
naaz, the sky knows i exist — didn’t captivate me as much as i was hoping from album standout “something good,” but a decent listen with some nice or interesting moments. i like the sweetness of her voice.
maisie peters, florescence — SNOOOOOOOOZE. wall to wall sleepy guitar sounds without a single song anywhere near as clever or fun as “i’m trying (not friends),” the song that put maisie on my radar years ago… in retrospect although i liked the good witch a lot maybe it was a sign about her taste in her own music that she omitted “cate’s brother,” for my money her best song, from the tracklisting. there are some nice songs here, but the FIFTEEN FUCKING TRACKS of whispering over a strummy guitar made it VERY hard to tell on listen-through which of them are worth keeping around… they would be much better served as the downshifts in a more varied tracklist, where they would stand out rather than run together with everything else. glad she’s happy but if this is the kind of music she really wants to be making i am significantly less hyped about the next one than i was about this.
other
love & fury: new york’s fighting against AIDS and act black: posters from black american stage and screen, at posterhouse — obviouslyyyyyyy there was no chance i was ever going to NOT love an exhibit about the iconography of AIDS education and activism in nyc… obviously i cried… some faves i snapped:
act black was really cool too, both for the posters themselves (fascinatingly Problematic as many of them were) and for the glimpse into a set of stories from screen history that are rarely told (partly because so many of the movies themselves have been lost). seeing examples of the kinds of “race pictures” actually getting made in the early cinema days — including the ones produced by a white company — made me mad all over again at damon lindelof’s watchmen, lmao.
posterhouse is free and open late on fridays and both times i have been there i had a really great visit (although i’ll confess i’m not sure i loved either of these quite as much as last year’s nuclear iconography exhibit…) so it is a strong ongoing rec for me to anyone living in or visiting new york!
2025 was kind of a flop year across the board habits-wise due to the double-whammy of spraining my ankle in early august and falling subsequently into a prolonged morass of moping and self-pity. it's true that the timing, wherein i managed to get back on my feet just in time to enter my busiest season of the year, was less than ideal, and it's also true that this year's busy season contained a few particularly annoying features, but it's also true that i didn't handle the situation as well as i could have. a while ago i was making small talk with someone a friend had just introduced me to and it occurred to me that this felt very easy and relaxed and fine, unlike basically every single social interaction at every other gathering i had dragged myself to and white-knuckled my way through with gritted teeth in september, october, and november, and it dawned on me, belatedly, oh, i was doing, like, Bad bad, which is a complicated thought for me because of how Bad bad for me, in the year 2025, is still so much better than almost every single period of my twenties that it's almost funny. but there it was, nonetheless, very clear by contrast. (if you saw me at a party between september and november and i was really weird: sorry! it wasn't you, it was me.) and i give myself grace for that, but i also think that it didn't have to get there.
there are two habits/routines, one old, one new, that i want to prioritize bringing back/bringing in for 2026:
journaling - i stopped journaling almost entirely early in the spring, and had already dropped the morning pages routine for a very abbreviated and less stream-of-consciousness style. i know, and to some extent knew then, exactly why i was doing that - there were things on my mind that were painful and scary enough that i couldn't bear facing them on the page day to day, and then, once those things were resolved, i was still carrying this buzz of undissipated anxiety about what might be lurking in my subconscious. i spent almost this whole year feeling disconnected from myself, except in occasional lucky spurts, and while there were external factors contributing to that, it's also true that refusing to (sorry) make space for an ongoing conversation with myself didn't help. it's further true that i suspect more and more that as much as i think i want to "feel less busy," on some subconscious level i think i must be using the feeling of busyness as an excuse to avoid things that feel meaningful and therefore vulnerable and risky. i've been back on morning pages recently and feeling both better and less busy though it is an investment of time (although i did finally start skipping lines after doing some googling to confirm that yes my teeny tiny handwriting means that three single-spaced pages is about twice as many words as most people expect the practice to produce). hysterically this is the main thing i have to give liz gilbert's bad memoir props for making me seriously reflect on.
the productivity system from a self-help book i read: i implemented the getting things done system near the end of august, and before work and the general unwellness knocked me off it i could feel that it was working as intended in two ways: (1) i was in fact getting more stuff done (2) i felt less totally insane about all the stuff i have to do all the time. i got back into it when work died down and the new sense of calm, though not absolute, was palpable, and i also think that if i hadn't been using it i would have struggled a lot more to accomplish various annoying paperwork related tasks in the month of december. the guy recommends updating the system every week and it's possible at some point that'll feel like what's right for me, but he also talks a lot about how the system works better over time because it builds a sense of trust in you that you can only achieve by actually consistently using it, and i feel like right now it's okay to say i need to look at this thing basically every day to keep myself trusting that i've got things under control.
there are also a bunch of habits i want to get back on, some of which i've been slacking on (or was unable to do) for ankle or malaise related reasons, but none of which feel like they need a lot of editing even though, again, 2025 was my flop era:
updating my little log/tracker, although i'm about to change the format a bit for 2026
work out - i really hemmed and hawed about putting this one on here because of My Ailments (remember that in addition to #myankle i also have tennis elbow #mytenniselbow although have maybe seen some improvements there? update pending further developments). but the reality is that i know i can do, like, lunges and single-legged RDLs and calf raises and core work, because i was doing those in PT (although i think i have to do them all bodyweight and also when i return to PT address the elbow issue first if it's not resolved by then, because i think pausing ankle PT is not making my ankle worse but doing ankle PT was making my elbow worse). if all that "working out" looks for me for the conceivable future is alternating days of 2-3 sets of 3 bodyweight lower body or core exercises... that's very boring but better than nothing.
get some art time every day - this was the only habit i really crushed this year lmao. it's a good one! i really recommend this for anybody casting about for a resolution because it can be as low effort as listening to a song you've never heard.
some kind of mobility work - didn't quite hit my 183 goal with this one but i will say that this is the one habit i probably did better on because of my ankle than i would have done without it.
digital tidying - this one i actually got really good at because i redefined it after reading the getting things done book to mean taking the appropriate steps on all incoming emails to deal with them or get them on their way to being in the system. i do want to make more progress this year with the way i originally defined this habit, which entailed clearing out various apps, message stores, etc., but, well, see below re: goals.
resetting my room to baseline - the fall really drove home for me how much this makes an impact on my day to day sense of wellbeing and calm lmao. i've been doing good since my big cleanup over break and i want to keep it that way!
flossing - one of the reasons i think my elbow is improving is that last night i flossed with regular floss and it took some being mindful/careful about my angles and how i was using my arms but it didn't aggravate my elbow. so hopefully this one will be easy to keep now that i no longer have to wrestle (knock wood) with my enemy, the floss picks.
100 ounces of water each day - everyone says you don't actually need to drink that much water but the visible difference in my skin when i'm doing this vs. when i'm not says otherwise!!!!!!!!!!!!!
70,000 steps a week - i actually want to be more proactive about really aiming for 10k a day mostly because my sleep cycle has been so fucked up lately and i (delusionally?) hope maybe this will help. but i'm still measuring success/failure on a weekly basis and really ultimately on a yearly basis - if i hit 3,650,000 it's a win! (2025 came in at 3,331,853 which i actually feel like is not so bad considering i was close to completely off my feet for a month and then was first too nervous and then too burned out to put any extra walking time into my schedule.)
habit i am dropping:
meditation... i know it's good for me but i also hate it so much. also i was doing it in the morning and i sort of feel like i can do morning pages or meditation but both is too much to expect of myself. at some point in the future when other routines feel secure maybe i will consider implementing a meditation practice at some other time... but for now... goodbye
habits i am keeping but with some edits:
no internet before 10: in 2023 i think i tried to set a no internet before 7 rule and by the end of the year i was like, i don't need rules anymore, i can just say Be Mindful, and then 2024 was a real flop era for being way too horribly online, so my rule for 2025 was no internet before 10. if you follow me and have literally ever checked your dashboard during the daytime you will probably be able to guess how well this went, LOL. all that said... i actually feel weirdly good about my relationship with the internet right now? i have a couple toxic lil vices i indulge in when i need a break from exerting any kind of self-control whatsoever, but for the most part the internet is either good (my tumblr dashboard) or soooooo fucking boring that i can't even be bothered to scroll (everywhere else). i also have noticed - and incidentally i don't think this was always true of me! - that lately my internet usage situation is very downstream from my other habits. so, this year, i am setting the simple but i think potentially important of: no internet use before i journal. if i can get that brain dump out before i let anything else in, it puts me in a position to feel like i'm spending my day making choices, which extends to the internet, rather than being buffeted by the winds of fate. i think this will be enough to keep me feeling like the internet is mostly a thing that is fun and nice... and if not, i did also remember this year that breaking glass in case of emergency (month-long internet fast in case of getting too online) can be a very helpful reset.
writing: i felt very frustrated all year long about writing except near the end of it when i was writing my little fanfiction. i was tempted to take off writing as a daily goal entirely since i felt like maybe that was creating too much pressure around it, but i was also worried that if i did that then i would just keep avoiding it forever even though it's another thing that makes my whole life so much better (is it a coincidence that the fog started to lift around literally everything in my whole life right about the time i got back into typing self-indulgent pornography into google docs? i genuinely don't think it is). so the compromise i'm striking is that my goal is to do something that supports me as a writer each day. i'm not even going to try to define what that means because i want to this to be a flexible and alive thing.
of my bigger, broader goals, the only one i accomplished was getting back into reading - i set a goal to read 50 books, and my final count was 69 (nice), 66 of which were new to me. i thought about setting a higher goal this year (i was so close to 75...), but i didn't want to disincentive myself from reading longer or denser books (i did read several books in the neighborhood of 500 pages or longer lol), and i also would like to also make some progress on the digital "to read" stack, so i'm setting 50 as a goal again, because reading is an area where i clearly do benefit from having a quantifiable goal but i don't think there's much of a value-add to making it a "stretch" one. i do feel like of all the things i wanted to accomplish in 2025, it's not the worst thing for getting back into reading to be the only one i actually did, especially since reading has been such a source of joy and interest this year.
on the topic of bigger goals: the getting things done book gave me a lot to think about in more ways than i expected. one thing that he kind of talks about in the book but that didn't click for me till i started using the system is that his system is partly a way to balance the endless list of Tasks and Goals with the reality of 16 waking hours a day filled with myriad demands on our time, energy, and attention. another thing that he actually talked about more explicitly in his reddit AMA than in the book is that one benefit of the system is to increase your ability to make choices based on intuition. thinking about that in combination with thinking about the ways i "use" stress as an avoidance mechanism has me feeling like... maybe this year i experiment with not setting any goals related to, like, food or my apartment or digital clean-up whatever, and just place all of that stuff under the umbrella of The System, and see what happens.
relatedly: i actually did an okay job of letting go of obsessive meditations on how ugly i am lmao. this year i am choosing to let go of the 9 million arbitrary rules i set for myself in theory to help myself accomplish things but in practice to create whole new ways for me to feel overwhelmed and/or like a failure. rules are okay if i think they are adding to my life (like 50 books, or flossing), but i have to learn to be really vigilant about when i am just building another cross to nail myself to.
that said i like being able to look back and say "in 2025 i really got back into reading books," so i decided it was okay to pick one (1) fun goal that i could look back on and say 2026 was the year of, and am opting for: 2026 is the year i get into tarot! i find tarot really fun, not least of all because it's a witchy woo-woo practice where arguably the totally rational explanation makes it sound more valuable rather than less. i also wound up getting added to a tarot-related group chat in december so this is a goal with some social structure around it, too. i'll consider this a success if by the end of the year i feel like i have at least a baseline reading of each card unassisted.
medialog april 2k26
books
lena valencia, mystery lights — meh. i was hyped for this one because it came recommended through the same newsletter that pointed me towards television, and because the content of the stories seemed quite up my alley: ghosts! UFOs (not the same as aliens)! creepy folklore! general eeriness! alas, i found this quite mid. there is a certain baseline competence to the stories, in that they move quickly and i never finished one wondering, what the hell was the point of that? or felt like something insufficiently plausible (on the character level, not re: spookiness) had marred the development of the plot. and despite the presence of Stephanie, Their Mutual Friend At Whose Barbecue They Had Met, the prose was as a general rule not overtly clunky. the problem is that it wasn’t anything else, either. the description that keeps coming to mind, as i have previously alluded to, is “YA-adjacent,” but i want to be clear that i specifically mean post-boom YA and also not the good stuff… like, yes this is nominally a book for adults, but i legitimately think as a writer she is nowhere near authors like courtney summers, laurie halse anderson, e. lockhart, sarah mccarry, et al., all of whom write YA but IMO have good ears and cannot be accused of writing prose without a voice. (even francesca lia block, a writer i would mostly not recommend trying out for the first time as an adult, at least writes with undeniable personality — while someone like judy blume, the OG, is not writing “literary” sentences but is out here thoughtfully capturing the believable idiosyncrasies of her adolescent narrators.) when i think of “YA-adjacent (derogatory),” i think of a style that certainly does specific things commonly associated with good writing, such as being specific, balancing description and action, producing reasonably realistic dialogue, etc., but that does those things in very bland way that lacks any real individuality. it’s not bad, per se, and to be honest i would take it over that strand of genre corniness i am so, so allergic too (although corniness can also be found in YA), but there’s nothing particularly enjoyable about the actual reading of it as opposed to the absorption of the story. that’s how i felt about this collection. not much that i can point to as particularly objectionable (stephanie excluded), and some of the ideas felt like they could have been really fun or compelling in the hands of another author, but the writing was such a total nothing that there was no real pleasure in it, the characters felt thinly sketched, the atmosphere was nonexistent (a real dealbreaker in allegedly eerie fiction)... etc. also there was one story with no supernatural stuff about being an unemployed 22-year-old in brooklyn during the blog years that was written in the second person present and while i’m pro–second person the combination of subject and form did make me think “it’s giving thought catalog” as an intrusive thought the whole time i was reading. so… there’s also that. i am also still thinking about that other more recent story where she claims an indie rock musician was once hailed as the second coming of dylan, reed, bowie, and cohen, all rolled into one, which, again, can’t emphasize this enough: No He Wasn’t.
andrew sean greer, less — this was very nice!!! i liked that the voice of the narrator felt very much like that of a “storyteller” in a pleasing, charming, old-fashioned sense, and i found our hapless not-quite-hero very endearing; the evocation of a mostly-vanished gay art scene was convincing, and i appreciated that it was a story about a kind of growth and rebirth at fifty that felt believably happy and optimistic without papering over the difficulties and losses of age. greer found one way to get away with writing about a writer, which is to make him not particularly successful (i would have maybe cut one scene of someone unexpectedly telling him how much they enjoyed his previous work…). i laughed out loud a few times. i did find it a bit slow — sometimes pleasurably, sometimes a bit less so — such that i spent most of the book thinking i liked it enough but probably wouldn’t bother with the sequel, but then the ending made me cry for real-real so now i think i might (unless one of you jumps in to tell me it’s terrible i suppose).
fritz leiber, conjure wife — this book slaaaaaapped. i didn’t love it quite as much as leiber’s “a deskful of girls,” which i am still begging all or any of you to read, but it was great fun. an ethnologist (it’s the 40s) in a stuffy college town discovers his wife has started exploring the practical applications of the witchcraft practices he was ethnographizing in his research; for the sake of her sanity, he demands that she put a stop to this delusional habit, and together they burn all her charms. naturally, his life immediately starts to fall apart. this is a pretty great premise (even better when you add in the other faculty wives also scheming supernaturally on behalf of their husbands — the extent to which this remains a campus novel, with the encroaching menace manifesting as bitter students and gossipy faculty members, is part of the pleasure), but leiber carries it out with real aplomb. he makes really wonderful use of the main character’s status as a social scientist, and there’s a lot of great passages where we, the readers of a novel about magic, watch him re-explain to himself the human mind’s susceptibility to coincidence; even as things grow progressively more undeniable, leiber maintains this fascinating depiction of a man caught between two beliefs — one that goes against everything he knows to be true, one contradicted more and more by his own senses — constantly vacillating between accepting that he’s taking certain steps for magic reasons and maintaining he’s only doing it so that his delusional wife in a psychotic break will continue to trust him so that he can help restore her to sanity. impeccable vibes, including one fantastically creepy end-of-chapter cliffhanger. i also admired the way that leiber constructed a world in which women do magic and men don’t but found a way (IMO) to mostly avoid essentializing about it in a cult-of-nature way. very fun book!!!
iain m. banks, consider phlebas — the third of the science fiction novels i added to my list for Project reasons. did i like this book? no, not at all. did i feel like it had literally any redeeming values whatsoever? i mean, if you like space opera stuff and creative worldbuilding, sure, probably; i am not the person to report on that. i guess i will also say there were two sequences that hinged on some genuinely repellent/upsetting concepts/situations in a way i did not enjoy but did more or less admire because it’s no mean feat to come up with a really disturbing fictional scenario (although i could have done without the attendant fatphobia in one of them). was the writing bad? it wasn’t great. i would say sentence to sentence i hated this somewhat less than i hated dawn, but it was also like twice as fucking long (and suffered similarly from the “nobody here is a real character” problem). there was a pregnancy plot point near the end of the book that made me really mad but then it wound up sort of moot in a way that in some ways made me less mad and in other ways made me feel like, okay well then that was even less fucking necessary, wasn’t it… i have learned that even fans of the ten-book series this kicked off often think this one kind of sucks and is slow and boring but god knows i will not be reading further to find out if things improve.
thomas pynchon, inherent vice — bummed to be disappointed by this! i started it out with high hopes because cali-noir about a huge stoner set during the nixon years sounds sooooo up my alley, but i just could not get myself on this book’s wavelength at all. the whole time i kept feeling like it was trapped between the modes of a very serious literary masterwork on the one hand and a proper noir on the other, and it never seemed to inhabit either of those modes fully enough or integrate them seamlessly enough for me to really click with it. i kept thinking i would rather read delillo or chandler instead of this peculiar hybrid that did not offer me the pleasures of either. in particular, the whole point of chandler, to me, is his sublime gift for Vibes and Atmosphere, and i felt like this book, despite being about a stoner running around california chasing various conspiracies, was curiously lacking in vibes… for such an ostensibly madcap plot, the actual writing felt quite staid, at times even plodding, but also never in a way that gripped me with its depth or intensity, either. the other big chandler contrast that kept surfacing for me was that while i wouldn’t call marlowe a dazzling feat of psychological nuance in characterization, there’s a certain compelling core to the character — the wounded romantic turned reluctant cynic — whereas our hero in vice is really truly just a stoner with no other discernible personality characteristics (i can see people, including pynchon, disagreeing with me, but like a lot about this book, his occasional moments of reflection or tenderness felt clumsily grafted on from some other guy rather than revealing about the person we had been spending time with… i just didn’t buy it idk). i also did not get pynchon’s sense of humor as displayed here at all — there are some pretty good jokes but there was also a lot of stoner/boner comedy that felt more fitting for the screen than for the page? like imagine reading a novelization of harold and kumar go to white castle… it wouldn’t be funny, right? because stoner humor is at heart stupid and requires solid comedic performances and good timing, editing, etc. to work? i also felt like a number of the female characters were written in a very tropey low-key objectified noir way that is forgivable from the midcentury pack but, like, this book came out in 2009… pynchon can definitely write, so i’m not wholly opposed to giving him another shot, and wonder if actually maybe one of his more straightforwardly “serious” works might work better for me… but most of them are like 600 pages long so i’m not exactly in a rush.
patricia lockwood, priestdaddy — i liked this a lot! lockwood is just such a fun writer; i enjoyed all her weird lil similes, her sense of humor, her cadence, etc. even her turns towards preciousness, quirk, tweeness, etc. — i could see some people being put off but for me she rode the line just right! one of the best things a memoirist can be is a person you just like having in your head, and lockwood is that. i did feel like the structure of the book was maybe a little less than wholly sound — i thought i had the rhythm of it and then towards the end we got a couple of sections that felt more like essays in an essay collection than chapters in the book i’d been reading. but i get the impulse to just put it all out there because who knows if you will ever get another chance to write about all this in a book again, and also some of that stuff wound up being among my favorite bits (including the chapter on voice i posted a quote from), so i’m not really complaining. as alluded to before, this book made me really reflect with profound gratitude on how awesome it is to be an estranged daughter and how lucky i am to have achieved this so young. that’s not really a comment on the book but my thoughts on it feel incomplete without it since i did think about it any time her dad did literally anything.
lily meyer, the end of romance — i picked this up because this interview the author gave to emily gould for her nymag newsletter made me curious about this as a book about nonethetical nonmonogamy and a female protagonist with alienating opinions on the kavanaugh hearings. i actually felt reading the book like it was much “softer” and more likable than i had been hoping for based on that — sophie is very straightforwardly a person driven insane early by the misfortune of being a sensitive child born to unemotional parents, a phenomenon i have watched make children crazy in real time, and then when you throw her horrible marriage on top of that everything she does makes total perfect sense — but naturally many goodreaders came away from this book furious at how terrible and selfish she is so i should have adjusted for my own position as a 6 on the kinsey scale of interest in character flaws. i did enjoy reading about a character who makes many bad decisions, some self-destructive and others outwardly destructive, for coherent psychological reasons, including at one point straight-up delusion and repeated lying to herself of a kind i like to see authors bold enough to tackle in fiction because it’s happened to me but it will always be met with a chorus of people mad that a character is acting in such a straightforwardly nonsensical way. i enjoyed other things about this book, too: a story about a woman repeatedly caught between what she believes and what she discovers she wants; her complicated history with female friendship and the narrative weight given to her most important female friend; a viscerally familiar description of being a neurotic bush-era teen who can’t make friends in college; the way sophie is concerned with what it means to be jewish in the world in a way that reminded me mostly of older books (although i’m not exactly actively keeping up with contemporary jewish-american lit lol) — there’s a sequence about christmas at her jewish boyfriend’s parents’ house that was very interesting; the imaginary turtle she carries out internal arguments with; a low-key #triggering in a good way depiction of when the guy you have to keep yourself ungoogleable from keeps sending you derangedly pleasant emails that make you want to kill yourself. the writing was just okay but it moved quickly, which after some real slogs i have come to see as a virtue in itself. i did feel like ultimately the book maybe didn’t totally land the plane, or did for some threads but not for the one it closes the curtain on… it’s hard for me to figure out how much this is a me problem because ultimately sophie’s vision of her happy ending is so profoundly my nightmare so it’s possible i’m being biased… but i think maybe the math of the book is not quite right and can think of a few adjustments that might have sold it to me better. i’m not sorry i read it, though, and i’m curious about the singer novel she says served as her original inspiration.
movies
game night — i feel like everyone says this movie is soooooooo good and funny but it was just okay. rachel mcadams is great though and we always love to see a new girl alum getting work!
the drama — i really loved this one… it has proven Controversial and there are some criticisms i think are valid, some i don’t personally agree with but can’t really argue with (like if you don’t buy the relationship, you don’t buy the relationship and i can’t talk you into that, but i did buy the relationship), and a lot that feel like they come from people who either have a very different understanding of the movie’s goals than i did (tbh some positive reviews also in this category), or have a very different view of the intersection of morality and adolescent psychology than i do. i guess i liked it because this movie made me think of things i did when i was very young or very unhappy or some combination of both that were not the result of reality-based thinking, and it made me think of how totally inarticulable and unreachable the headspace i did those things in is now and often was even very shortly after they had been done, and how in my heart of hearts i cannot believe that the reason i didn’t hurt anyone more seriously than i did (which is not to say i didn’t hurt anyone; i did) is because i’m a better person than other people who hurt people much more seriously when they were very young or very unhappy or some combination of both. i think i am lucky, and only lucky, that the circumstances of my life and certain accidents of my temperament limited the scope of the harm i could perpetuate. i don’t think this says anything about my moral character. and i felt like the drama was in conversation with this kind of outlook. zendaya, whom i have always liked as a screen presence but never before particularly admired as an actor, captures something about a specific kind of shame in this performance that i have never seen brought to life on screen. there’s something about how lost she is, offering the explanation she has for the person she was, almost became, which she knows cannot possibly be good enough, which she knows can only sound hopelessly stupid and inadequate said out loud, that has really stayed with me, on a personal level and in conjunction with what to me the movie has to say, or at least to offer, not so much about violence itself (which the movie, arguably, has nothing to do with — i think the ambiguity of this question is more present in the movie than it has been in the discourse about it) but about our desperate need to explain it. i’ve thought about this movie more than anything else i’ve seen this year, by a long shot, and i’m hard-pressed honestly to remember the last time a movie proved this sticky for me. pattinson is also great, and i did love their chemistry — i found it really romantic (and quite funny, too).
the love parade — an early lubitsch, from his musicals era. the first half of this movie, about an ambassador kicked out of france for excessive horniness who goes home to fall in love with and seduce his virginal yet incredibly horny queen, is a total delight, full of great gags well-balanced between smart and gleefully not, powered by the charisma and chemistry of the exuberantly horny central duo and the energy of the supporting cast. then the second act starts and even before it gets to the dismaying taming of the shrew ending, it just loses all its fizz, fun, joy, etc…. the movie can’t figure out how to keep its tone entertaining, or how to build drama out of its scenario without going so broad the balance of the whole thing just falls apart. love that first act tho! great gag with a dog. some fun comedy-choreography in the servants’ numbers, providing almost enough razzle-dazzle to make you forget about how very 1929 they are re: gender.
the christophers — the latest tiny little soderbergh diorama, guess what i liked it, fish found in ocean, etc. ian mckellan as a crabby, arrogant, cancelled-ish artist delivers some monologues gorgeously and also gives a specific intonation to the line “i was bisexual” that is maybe my favorite line reading of the year. i had never seen micaela coel in anything and was so impressed by her ability to hold her own in what is essentially a two-hander opposite, y’know, ian fucking mckellan; casting her was also critical given that her character necessarily talks much, much less than mckellan’s, and her incredible screen presence makes her feel like an equal partner dramatically even though she’s often “just” reacting. very talky script, giving theater a little bit, in a way film people often dislike but i reliably enjoy. james corden appropriately cast as a guy who’s really embarrassing and annoying. we saw a q&a with cast/screenwriter/director and the best part was how visibly happy ian mckellan was to be able to talk about making a real movie with a real director and a real script after his years in the x-men mines.
mother mary — if i had a nickel for every time this month i saw micaela coel anchor half of a two-person show about artistic resentments opposite an established member of hollywood royalty… i was very excited for this movie and i enjoyed it a lot. is it good? i don’t super know. i sort of want to rewatch it because it revealed itself as we progressed as something other than what i imagined it was going to be — something operating squarely in the realm of magic and myth, but also a much simpler narrative than the green knight was — and i’d like to revisit it and see how it feels knowing now the shape of it. it might be a little underbaked, although there were a couple specific touches i really liked. but i love anne hathaway and i guess i love micaela coel now too and they are two of the most beautiful women in the world and i like ghosts and sparkly costumes and female friendship stories and pop music and that was all happening in my face for two hours very bright and lovely to look at and listen to so i was happy.
monte carlo — another lubitsch musical and unfortunately the only total dud i have seen from him… a number of problems but most of all the jokes simply aren’t good and what can you do if that’s the case? jeanette macdonald, so lovely and charming in the love parade, tries her best, but the script just isn’t there. alas!
tv
silicon valley (all seasons) — i started putting this on to motivate myself to do my mobility exercises and then as usual i got obsessed with it and had it on in the background for everything until i had finished all six seasons. obviously my feelings on this show are no secret but i do think that it’s just such an achievement. the writing is really intricate in a way you can only get away with in a heightened reality (like a sitcom) but it’s driven by internal character stuff such an impressively high percentage of the time, such that all their last-minute rescues feel like magic tricks rather than cheats (a favorite of mine is the season 4 finale, when the thing that saves them is that a few episodes ago gilfoyle hacked jian-yang’s new fridge out of spite — it’s such an in-character thing to have happened that bringing it back to actually mean something feels perfect instead of cheap). the show is also just so well-calibrated in terms of knowing exactly how much our guys should lose and come across as losers (not always the same thing) vs. how often they should get to win and be cool (ditto)... you can really see this in the finale, where everyone gets their happy ending but with just the right amount of friction for it not to feel sappy. and the jokes remain great. in conclusion, i sure do love this show i have watched start to finish now at least five times.
music
here’s a recentish single from the band that took over my listening towards the end of the month, because i got legitimately emotional hearing emily haines sing “it makes me jealous of my former self / i had to tame her for my mental health”:
robyn, sexistential — yay robyn :) really liked this, find her as funny and weird and charming as ever (the adam driver/adam sandler line… lmao), appreciated that while it’s not quite body talk it’s definitely more pop-forward/hook-driven than her last project which i respected as Art but did not gel with in the same way… but she’s like kesha in that she’s just someone whose voice and vibe i like having in my earholes.
mary middlefield, will you take me as i am? — spotify girlpop that gets too soupy for me but has some good tunes when it’s not doing that!
taylor acorn, poster child — i added this to my to-listen list based on the earnestness (and hookiness) of the stompclap-adjacent “home videos” and was very pleasantly surprised to learn that it’s an outlier on the album, which is otherwise much more in the mode of breakaway-era kelly clarkson. if you like breakaway-era kelly clarkson you should give this one a listen!
august ponthier, everywhere isn’t texas — soupy mopey tumblrcore theater kid pop that mostly struck me as annoying but harmless and not nearly as bad as the corook album that i hated so much that year even though it’s in a similar Sensitive Theater Kid mode (at least this album for example did not have the actual lyric “i’m a sensitive person”), BUT!!! then i got to the track “angry man” and i got SO ACTUALLY GENUINELY MAD because the chorus literally goes, “i know the saying, but it only hit me now / if you grew up with an angry man in your house / all the time / there’s always gonna be an angry man / in your mind.” which summoned up alllllll of my inner FUCK OFFFFFFF reserves, because: fuck off! i find it sooooo fucking lazy to outsource the CHORUS!!!! of your allegedly vulnerable song about your evil dad to Some Decontextualized Content You Saw Excerpted On Social Media. like, that’s abnegating the literal sole job of the artist, which is to struggle to find words for that which cannot be completely articulated. and it makes me sooooooo crazy to pass off something from someone else’s ART as “a saying.” fuck off. on the bright side it was because i was so mad at this that i looked up catherine lacey’s “cut” which was so good i now have one of her books out from the library!
mitski, nothing’s about to happen to me — is the title a hint that this is a concept album about what if nothing ever happened ever? because wow this was BORING. mitski is one of those artists i’m forever meaning to check out but now i’m like, perhaps my avoidance in this case was telling me something real, because snooooooooooooze.
makthaverskan, glass and bones — have been loving an older album of theirs, loved this one too which sounds exactly the same! love a good jangly indie rock setting for a lady wailing melodically…
imarhan, essam — dave called this “algerian desert blues” which is as good a summation as i can make; this has a cool, warm sound (wait ok that looks stupid but i mean the version of cool that is not opposed to warm… you know what i mean), feels kind of sparse and big at the same time? i wasn’t exactly surprised that i liked it but i was surprised that some of the songs have lingered in rotation past a second listen (not based on quality, based on my own tastes on what i like to jam to vs. what i like to try once as an Album Experience).
julianna barwick & mary lattimore, tragic magic — not quite as magical as the last album that made me think about being an eighth grader who loved enya and loreena mckennitt (that would be disinblud’s self-titled debut, for those keeping score at home), but even at my grown age it is nice to occasionally revisit the genre of Take Me Away To My Home Among The Faeries music.
lia larsson, DUNKA — endearingly annoying europop, fun to listen to something that commits this chirpily to the bit — but just the once.
plash, i live alone — some nice sounds happening, so much so that towards the beginning i briefly wondered if i had softened my stance on dudes with guitars without realizing… but by the end of the album i was so bored it retroactively made me dislike the beginning.
HANA, HANA — i literally cannot remember anything about what this sounded like at all
hemlocke springs, the apple tree under the sea — truly honestly sincerely from the bottom of my heart one of the worst things i’ve ever heard in my life, but in a weird way where i wasn’t mad about it at all. off-the-charts theater kid energy of the kind that reminded me of why i never got into the dresden dolls meets a singing voice that’s like… an abrasive baby voice with questionable pitch trying to be a rock star? really, really, profoundly unpleasant. but, again, in a way where i was like… well, good for you… you have a passion, and a vision, and those are beautiful things to have… i can’t imagine anyone would want to listen to this on purpose but you’re closing in on half a million monthly listeners on spotify so clearly someone does and i think that’s so wonderful… it’s amazing when someone makes the art that comes from their soul and other people’s lives are enriched by it… you could not pay me to listen to 30 seconds of this ever again though.
fif, the lower forty-eight — lots of cool scuzzy indie rock band jamming out sounds that i liked listening to but were not really song-shaped enough to bring me back for more.
snail mail, ricochet — snail mail is another one of those artists i’m always like “oh yeah i should check them out but i’m never in the right Mood…” happily while i wouldn’t say i was blown away i certainly liked this album much better than the mitski one.
jens lekman, songs for other people’s weddings — ok i thought this was like a clever title for an album i assumed would be a collection of, like, love songs, romantic songs, bittersweet songs, elegiac songs, etc., but this is actually something much more awesome which is a concept album about a wedding singer going through a break-up. it’s whimsical and strange, with musical theater overtones in a neutral to good way, and very sonically sweet, and, i dunno, the moment i realized what was actually happening i was just so charmed by the fact that someone had come up with this idea and turned it into music! i would recommend taking a walk and listening to the story unfolding…
WILLOW, petal rock black & thunder wave — willow is never doing my favorite thing, but she’s definitely a best-case-scenario nepo-baby in that she’s just out here surprise-dropping jazz-pop experiments clearly fueled by nothing more than figuring out what sounds good to her and brings her satisfaction to make. that’s exactly what you should be doing if you are the daughter of two extremely famous parents with more money than god. i do find it really impressive that she self-produces and think she’s legitimately extremely good at it… i’d love to hear her produce for other people just because the world would be better with more willow production in it.
mother mary: greatest hits — ok honestly, bops on bops on bops!!!!! antonoff & charli really did understand the assignment here, and i’m so charmed by the way that anne hathaway (who as per the david lowery q&a we saw after mother mary apparently did like 1 million vocal takes on the songs) did the thing that real life pop girls do all the time and aped the pronunciations and intonations of the demo vocalist, channeling charli’s essex accent into some recognizably british “can’t”s despite playing an american lmao. “holy spirit 2” early song of the summer contender, when the chorus dropped in the movie i smiled so wide because for a moment i really felt like i had spent so many years writing insane tumblr posts about real life pop star mother mary and she was out here singing this for us. i mean, “did you ever feel you’re holy? did you ever feel it? did you ever fear it?” would have gone soooooooo crazy #onhere in 2014!!!!!!!!!
metric, pagans in vegas — so like a week before their new album came out i became seized with this desire to only listen to metric that also became a need to go through their entire discography chronologically (minus the uh cosmopolis soundtrack they did with howard shore??? what???????), so first of all i would like to start by publicly acknowledging that i underrated synthetica, unfairly punishing it for its crime of being the first metric album to come out after i spent all of 2009 listening to fantasies while going so so crazy and dropping out of college LMAO. anyway i was still too sensitive after that experience to even give this one a chance when it came out, but it’s also pretty good! i have learned it’s not beloved in the fandom but idk why, i thought it had some bops and brought back a little heft after the haze of synthetica.
metric, formentera II — this one i just like totally missed coming out entirely… it was also good in a way i don’t have much to say about and i should probably return to it at some point (and regular formentera, which i did listen to but was clearly not in the right place for because how did i not bother to save “paths in the sky,” which has since relisten entered possibly my metric top ten) but my listening was soon fully dominated by…
metric, romanticize the drive — yay new metric! i was honestly worried when i learned via reddit that they’d teamed back up with the production team behind fantasies for this one because like DON’T PLAY WITH MY HEART LIKE THIS, but while the specific biographical confluence of album and self that has made fantasies so enduringly special to me will probably never be repeated (or, like, i mean, i HOPE not!), this album is great, very hook-driven but also with a little more oomph and edge than a lot of their recent work, metric at their most pop but still hitting hard. it’s also just crazy that they are TEN ALBUMS IN and still good. this whole journey #MyJourney, which really took over all my listening for like the last two weeks of the month, has really brought home that i do need to start haunting the resale sites in july in the hopes of seeing them on tour even though i don’t care about either of the bands they’re playing with.
other
cherry blossoms peak weekend & nina browne, notice/know/kin, @ the brooklyn botanic garden — first of all, did you know that it’s the brooklyn botanic garden? not botanical. botanIC. don’t you hate that? i hate it. but i love the BBG so i forgive them. second: yay i managed not to miss cherry blossom peak bloom! the last time i went it was during the weekday with someone else with a weird schedule, but this time my tutoring schedule had me a couple subway stops away on a saturday, so i took my opportunity then and was really delighted to discover that the weekend of the peak bloom span brings out tons of new yorkers from all over in groups to see the pretty pink flowers, some dressed head-to-toe in pink thematically, all bustling with a nice kind of unofficial holiday energy. it was very cute!!! one of their buildings also had this cool exhibit up of art inspired by scientific botanical imagery; you can check out the artist here. because the gardens were so crowded i cannot post any of the cherry blossoms pics i took but here are some close-ups of my favorite flowers i saw:
storytelling & mozart @ the morgan library & museum — first of all i had been vaguely aware of the existence of the morgan but had never actually gone and would like to start by saying their building is very nice! the storytelling exhibit was one of those catch-all exhibits with a loose theme that’s an excuse to show Some Of Our Cool Stuff, some of which was indeed quite cool; my favorite of course was the room dedicated to new york stuff :) it included this 1973 stuart steinberg sketch that’s a precursor to his famous new yorker cover on a similar theme:
the mozart exhibit was also cute and i liked that it seemed to convey that the impish characterization of mozart in amadeus was to some degree true to life—he was a jokester! (although shout-out also to the one placard that really wanted us to know that joking about bodily processes was extremely normal in upper-class german society at the time.)