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#isitsoupyet
A List of My Shortcomings
Please note, this list is not comprehensive, but for starters…
Appearances to the contrary, I am a prolific blog writer.
Night after night, I work tirelessly crafting essays of unparalleled depth and emotion. Most nights, I say to myself, “Jeri. You should get up and go write that down.” But lost in that magical place between wakefulness and sleep, bursting with lucid thought, I am also a victim of sleep paralysis.
I should keep a pad and pen on my night table for writing all of those thoughts down as soon as I wake in the morning. But waking in our house is usually heralded by, “Can I get up now?” and I’d rather have breakfast with my buddy than write. So, #1, I suck at writing things down. That might be over critical, because I do write things down; I jot ideas down on bits of paper and in my notebook and on the backs of used envelopes. But too often, I don’t take the time to transcribe those notes into something that looks like a blog post.
Part of the problem is my attention span. I’ll start out with a really good idea (my opinion, obvi) and start typing away and then…I’ll see something out of the corner of my eye. Not a squirrel. Well, maybe sometimes a squirrel, but more often a spider. My mother used to say, “Every old house has spiders.” And if she were still around, I’d want to be all, ‘Not in this crib, bitch.” I wouldn’t normally speak to my mother like that, except for she taught me that rhyme about Miss Muffet. Do you know it?
Little Miss Muffet Sat on her tuffet, Eating her curds and whey.
Along came a spider who sat down beside her And said, “What’s in the bowl, bitch?”
There was a G rated version (”What’s in the bowl, babe?”), but I grew out of it.
I think Mom might have also gone into detail about how Miss Muffet dealt a blow for women by standing up for herself and not taking any lip from an arachnid, but none of that negates the fact that our old house does have spiders. Every now and again, one does its best to make it up the water spout by way of my computer screen, or lamp, or window frame. Since I’m relatively certain none of them are related to Charlotte, except in the taxonomic familial sense, the swift hand of justice, wielding a Kleenex, drops the boom.
Although, if my young friend is in the vicinity to bear witness, we have to employ a rescue and relocation effort. The other day, I spotted a spider in the tub while Jack was at the sink brushing his teeth. I casually reached for a Kleenex and, with my back to my grandson, dispatched the intruder.
“Grommie! Why did you do that?! He was not even bothering you.”
And here it is, 5 o’clock in the morning, and this guy pops up looking like he heard there was a casting call or something…
Sometimes it’s just the glimmer of a spider that distracts. That tiny movement caught out of the corner of your eye that puts you on high alert. Remember when I shared my office awhile back? Then there was the curtain debacle? And then I was waiting for the glass tops for the shelving? There are three walls of windows in this office, how did I not think about glass tops reflecting every bird, insect and airplane that flies by? I’m a little over it now, but the first few weeks with the glass in here and I was jumping for a tissue every two seconds.
That brings me to problem area #2: Delayed Gratification.
Yesterday I wanted to snap a quick picture of fabric samples to send to a client. There was a perfect moment when the light was falling across my desk just so and I realized I’d reduced and recycled enough to frame a shot that didn’t require massive editing. I was so enamored of how things were looking that I snapped a couple more.
Then I went to my files to find a photo of where we started, and that made me think this place is worthy of some professional photos. At the least, some shots that involve planning and forethought. Hmm. Planning and forethought. But who knows when the sun is going to shine and the stars are going to align again over a clean work surface? I want to show somebody right now.
Because I started with this
And we did a couple of things
So this is where I sit now:
It’s been such a long and winding road getting from point A to point B with this room, it makes me wonder…if I had the patience to work through all of that, why can’t I wait for better photography?
Okay, let’s add #3: Making Sense.
But I will not be swayed. I am not delaying the gratification of sharing these early photos. I will not delay the gratification of hitting the ‘Post Now’ button, by stopping to proofread and edit.
And I’m not going to be distracted by the host of ideas I’m now having during normal business hours for posts about the path to this office. I think I’m gonna have to sleep on them first.
#InsideVoice #IsItSoupYet #MayNeedAThirdAndFourthCoffeeBreak #WaitHaveIHadCoffeeToday? #AmITheOnlyOneThatFeelsLikeTodayIsMonday