#jackass-biomancer

[ask-the-crimson-king]

The Beast lashes its tail excitedly! A featherbird! It loves featherbirds! This one is nice and big! The Beast pads forward on little white paws, and sniffs the edge of the featherbird's wing with its little pink triangle nose.

Kazakh looks at the cat, then looks away, then looks back at it.

“Hey, wait a minute, you aren’t Pandora...” the daemon said, squinting at the creature. He took a couple steps back, then circled around it once. Inspecting it. 

Then, he spread his wings open, puffing out his chest, and said, “Shoo!”

[lords-of-dawn]

Little Doom reaches out a fluffy, claw-y paw towards Markov's hand. She wants his writing implement...

“No little c-countess.” He chuckled and pulled his pen just a bit further from her grasp. “I already g-gave you my other pens, did I not?” He asked her before casting his eyes to the several pens that laid discarded upon his floor. 

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

Can I just say, I think that hiring an erotica author to write books about space marines probably is a very deliberate and calculated choice to achieve a particular outcome - and if it wasn't, it damn well should have been.

I agree entirely and think, personally, we should hire more erotica authors until 40K becomes a Freudian hellscape so jam-packed with innuendo and confusing eroticism that readers are forced to decide if they want to use their book pages to mop up tears or the shameful climaxes that can only result from perusing a Squat on Carnifex love scene

[ask-rune-priest-ulfric]

A quiet knock sounds at the door to Ulfric's room at the Fairy Grove Lodge.

it had been a few hours since he had arrived and everything went down. After Meli left Ulfric had just decided to do some light reading before turning in for the night. He promised himself to pay the hotel handsomely for the inconvenience that was himself. Just as he was about to fall asleep, he heard a knock at the door. He quickly put on a shirt and headed towards the door. he got to the door saying “Who is it?” in as polite a tone as possible and looked through the spyhole to see for himself.

[ask-abaddon-the-despoiler]

Meli's gaze falls upon the Despoiler, the Warmaster of Chaos, the Lord of the Black Legion... and she hugs him tightly.

The hug was not unexpected, and perhaps robbed him of some ‘chaos points’ as it was in front of everyone. He didn’t care. Abaddon hugged Meli right back, just as tight. “How you been?” he grunted into her hair.

[ask-lord-commander-dante]

Some sort of hairy, mostly-white Beast trundles up to Dante. It places its little white forepaws on his golden power armour boot and stands up, sniffing the air as it inspects him, plumed light-brown tail writhing. "Mewwwh?" it asks.

Dante turned his mask-covered face down to see what manner of creature had made the noise. It reminded him of a smaller version of a felinid that was native to Baal. “Where did you come from?” he asked it; the instinct to talk to small, furry creatures appeared to survive the transition into transhuman. “What can I do for you? Are you hungry?”

[ask-vox-hailer-boy]

more... more hot space marine boy pls...

He is only 1600, he is far too young for you. 

[pumpkin-stem]

🌵 How do you defend your base?

Well,,,I don’t lol. I play in peaceful like 99.99% of the time. But whenever I do play a different difficulty, I usually try to build up high with an overhang or something, fence around my house, and keep the area lit up well!

Thank you for sending in an ask! <3