Goodbye To You - Dean x Y/N, Dean x Carmen
Title – Goodbye To You Pairings – DeanXCarmen, Y/N, Sam Word Count – 6,106 Warnings – ANGST, absolutely wrong use of medical terms and practices, confused Dean Prompt – Character A has to watch Character B fall in love with someone else.
“Hey, stranger,” Y/N said, coming up behind Sam at the bar. He turned and looked at you, a smile breaking across his face. He stood and pulled you into a tight hug.
“Hey, sweetheart,” Sam says quietly. Once they break, she pulls a stool beside her best friend. She and the brothers grew close after they showed up in her clinic one evening when a hunt went wrong. Being the only doctor on staff that night was a blessing as she grew up in the hunter’s world before breaking free for medical school.
“How did you get here before your brother? Isn’t he the one who prefers the bar to being at home?” Y/N asked as she waved down the bartender.
“There’s something you should know about Dean before he gets here,” Sam starts but gets interrupted by his brother walking up to them.
“Y/N!!” Dean shouts. She turns and looks at him with bright, excited eyes and a wide smile. Jumping off her chair, she throws herself into Dean’s arms, and he spins her around, laughing. Before Y/N could lean in and kiss him, Dean turned and held his hand to a woman watching the interaction with amusement.
“Y/N, I want you to meet someone. Someone important to me,” Dean said. Y/N watches as the dark-haired woman takes Dean’s hand, intertwining their fingers. Her smile falters slightly. “Y/N, this is Carmen. My fiancé.” Y/N’s mouth drops open in shock, her eyes wide as she takes in their linked hands, but she recovers quickly.
“You… your fiancé…” Y/N stutters, glancing at Sam. He gives Y/N a sympathetic smile and nods. “I… I had no idea.”
“I’ve heard so much about you from both these guys. I can’t wait to get to know the most important woman in their lives,” Carmen said, stepping forward and embracing Y/N in a hug. She startles but hugs Carmen.
“Well, second most important now,” Dean says, and the pain that binds Y/N’s chest takes her breath away momentarily. Y/N blinks quickly to hide the tears that rush to her lash line. Dean watches the two girls hug before leaning over and ordering two beers.
“I think we are going to become great friends,” Carmen said, pulling back but keeping her hands on Y/N’s shoulders. Y/N nodded, and a forced smile was on her face.
“Yeah!” Y/N ground out in a happy voice. Dean handed Carmen her beer and then pointed over his shoulder.
“We’re going to grab a pool table; join us.”
“Oh, Sam and I need to get drinks first,” Y/N said, leaning on the bar top. She tried to make it look casual and not like it was holding her up. Dean’s expression dropped as he realized they didn’t have drinks before them.
“Oh, shit. Sorry guys, lemme grab the first round,” he muttered, trying to flag the bartender down again. Y/N shook her head and waved her hand.
“Don’t worry about it. Go grab a table, and we’ll be over there shortly.”
“You sure?”
“Absolutely.”
“Okay.”
Dean grabbed Carmen’s hand and kissed her forehead, leading her to the pool tables. Y/N watched them walk away before turning and facing the bar, her eyes burning.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Y/N breathed, her hands gripping the counter tightly. Sam frowned, observing her. He knew how deep Y/N’s feelings went for his older brother.
“I tried to get it out before he got here; he just was faster than I expected,” he said quietly. Y/N nodded, eyes staring blindly at the bar top. She barely hears Sam order two tequila shots, Y/N’s comfort liquor.
“How long?” she asked.
“Almost a year,” Sam answered. Y/N laughed without humor. “What?”
“We were still fucking around last year,” she said flatly, reaching for one of the shot glasses the bartender placed in front of them. She threw the tequila back and barely flinched at the burn, the pain in her heart far worse than that in her throat.
“Yeah, I know,” Sam replied. “I told him if he was going to get serious with Carmen, he had to tell you and call it off. I guess he didn’t say anything to you, though.”
“No, he didn’t,” Y/N whispered, shaking her head. “But it explains why he’s been so distant. I don’t think he realizes that you and I talk more now.” Sam ran a hand up and down her back, offering subtle comfort. Y/N closed her eyes and took a shaky breath as she shook her head. A few stray tears filled her cheeks, and she wiped them away violently.
Enough. He made his decision, and it wasn’t you. Be a big girl and get through tonight. You can cry about it back in the hotel room… her inner voice growled at her. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, a shiver going through her. When Y/N opened her eyes again, they were dry and distant. She lifted her head to look at Sam with a smile. Sam studied his friend with a frown. Y/N simply shrugged and reached for her glass.
“What?” she asked.
“What?” he parroted.
“Things happen for a reason, right?” Y/N asked quietly. She held her glass out for him to toast, and after a long pause, he picked up his glass and clinked it against hers. She threw back the second shot of tequila, wincing slightly, before ordering a beer and another round for Sam.
“C’mon. Now we have to beat them.”
“It’s been fun, you guys, but I need to call it a night.”
“It’s only 9:30!” Dean exclaimed, one arm thrown around Carmen.
“I’ve got an early morning tomorrow,” she said, reaching for her bag.
“What could you possibly have tomorrow morning that is more important than hanging out with us right now?” Dean scoffed. Y/N threw a questioning look at Sam, who shook his head slightly. Looks like we are all keeping secrets now, she thought to herself with a sigh. Y/N shook her head and dug into her wallet for a couple of twenties to pay for her drinks. Sam placed a hand on hers to stop her.
“I’ve got you,” he said, causing her to look up. She shot him a soft smile.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure,” Sam said with a smile, squeezing her hand. She nodded, closed her wallet, and shoved it back in her bag. “Are you staying with us or…”
“I’ve got a hotel,” Y/N answered, her eyes darting to the couple across from her before returning to Sam. “They got me a hotel for a few nights, figured the least I can do is take them up on their hospitality.”
“Wait, so you aren’t staying with us?” Dean asked. He moved his arm from around Carmen and leaned forward on his elbows. “You always stay with us. And who is they? What’s going on?”
“Well,” Y/N hesitated, looking at Carmen, who watched the interaction quietly. “Things have changed now, Dean.”
“Changed?” he muttered quietly, turning to look at Carmen. Carmen, who was now looking at Dean with a raised brow. “Oh.”
“Here, let me walk you to your rental,” Sam said. Y/N nodded.
“Okay. It was awesome meeting you, Carmen. Dean, don’t do anything stupid,” Y/N said with a tight smile. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow afternoon, okay? I’ll come by around five?”
“Sounds great, Y/N. See you then,” Carmen said, watching Sam walk her to the door. Once they were out of sight, she turned and looked at her unusually quiet fiancé and raised a brow.
“So, babe,” she started, picking up her beer bottle. “Anything you want to fill me in on?”
“What time is your interview at Lawrence Memorial?” Sam asked. Y/N smiled reluctantly.
“Nine a.m. I was hoping to get into the emergency department here. It would have been nice to settle down here with you guys and grow some roots. But if he’s engaged to Carmen and it's serious, it might be for nothing,” Y/N said. The two walked up to a white Honda Accord.
“You could still come back, make a home here. It’d be awesome to see you more regularly,” Sam said.
“I don’t know. The whole point was to come back here and commit to Dean, you know? Tell him how I feel and make a real go at it. There’s no point now,” she said dejectedly. When she realized what she said, her eyes flew open. “No, Sam, that’s not what I meant…”
“I know what you meant, don’t worry,” Sam said calmly, though he was slightly stung. “I know you’re hurting right now, so don’t worry about it.”
“I just don’t see the point,” Y/N said quietly. “I don’t want to be reminded about how little I meant to Dean every day.”
“You know what? Go through the interview anyway and see how you like it. You might find that the hospital is exactly what you want anyway. You’ve been talking about wanting a change for a long time, and this could be it. Besides, you need to do this for you, not for him. He doesn’t deserve you anyhow,” Sam reminded her. Y/N smiled and reached up to hug Sam tightly.
“I love you, you know that?” she said quietly.
“Of course you do,” he said, squeezing her back. “Now go get some rest and nail that interview.”
“Hi, I have a nine a.m. appointment with Doctor James Montgomery. I’m Y/N Y/L/N,” she said to the receptionist at the front of the hospital. Y/N watched as the kind older woman typed into the system and then nodded her head.
“Yes, I see you right here. If you would take a seat, I’ll page Dr. Montgomery down, and he will be right with you,” she said, pointing to a row of chairs nearby. Y/N nodded her head and sat down. She brushed a strand of brown hair behind her ear, then smoothed out her skirt as she waited.
“Dr. Y/L/N,” a handsome man said, dressed in scrubs and carrying a file. Y/N stood up and smiled at him. She accepted his handshake and nodded in greeting. “Welcome to Lawrence Memorial.”
A tour of the emergency department, an interview with Dr. Montgomery and three other doctors, and a review of her qualifications. Y/N walked out of the hospital three hours later, feeling confident that she had nailed the interview. The emergency department, while smaller than the one she worked at in Kentucky, was clean and state-of-the-art. They obviously cared about the patients that came into their hospital and were thorough in their caretaking. The hospital had some of the latest technology on the market and was in line to get some of the newest pieces. She watched how the doctors and nurses worked and recognized a seamless flow, a trust between everyone there that some ERs didn’t have… including her home in Kentucky.
She could do good work here if she decided to take the job.
If she was offered the job.
Getting into her rental, she sped off to the hotel to change into something more casual before meeting Sam for lunch. The two book nerds would meet at their favorite cafe for sandwiches before hitting the old bookstore for research. Then, they would meet with Dean and Carmen, something she still had to work up the courage for.
“It was 20 questions last night after you left,” Sam said casually, popping a potato chip into his mouth. Y/N’s eyes snapped to Sam’s face despite her sipping her sweet tea, her chicken salad sandwich and chips untouched.
“Really? By who?” she asked.
“Who do you think?” he replied with a smirk. “Carmen.” Y/N stared at Sam briefly, then smirked back at him.
“She didn’t know about me either, did she?” Y/N asked. Sam shook his head.
“Nope,” he grinned, tossing another chip into his mouth. Y/N laughed lightly as she picked up half of her sandwich.
“Well, I’m kind of happy I’m not the only one who was blindsided last night then,” she said, biting into the chicken salad. She wiped her mouth with a napkin as she swallowed. “He deserves it for being a jerk about the whole situation. I hope it was uncomfortable as hell.”
“Oh, it was. ‘You slept with her, didn’t you?’ ‘Was it while we were together?’ ‘Tell me the truth, you’re still in love with her, aren’t you?’” Sam quoted in a mocking tone. Y/N bit her lip as mixed feelings banged around her chest. She was glad Dean was getting lectured, but at the same time, she hated that this was why.
“You’d think he’d have told his fiance the truth even though he didn’t have the balls to tell me,” she grumbled, again picking up her tea. She took a long sip and stared out the window at nothing in particular, pain flashing in her eyes as she thought about the two. No, we agreed we’d let it go, she told herself. Sam frowned and reached over to grab her hand.
“Hey,” he said quietly. Y/N looked up at him and forced a smile on her face.
“I’m fine. Really,” she said. “Let’s finish up. I want to hit up that bookstore so we can finish that research you need done.”
Ultimately, Y/N ended up taking the job with Lawrence Medical. The offer was too good to refuse, so she returned to Kentucky to pack her things. Sam flew out a week later, helped her pack her belongings into a Uhaul, hitch her old Mustang onto a trailer, and drove the hours away with her back to Lawrence.
“I picked out an apartment for you,” Sam said a few hours into the drive, between bites of Twizzlers. “I know you’ll love it, so I dropped the deposit. It’s halfway between the hospital and our place, has two bedrooms, and is one of the few complexes with a fireplace.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” Y/N said, a sweet smile on her face.
“Don’t worry, I took the money out of Dean’s half of the savings,” he laughed.
“Oh, well, in that case, I’m totally okay with it,” she said with a wave of a hand. She took a bite of the red licorice candy and stared out the window for some time before asking the question she didn’t want the answer to. “When is their wedding supposed to be?”
“Sometime in the next four months. Carmen wants a winter wedding, and Dean will do whatever Carmen wants,” Sam said quietly.
“Dean hates the cold. He prefers the summer,” she muttered under her breath. Sam glanced at her, taking notice of the sadness in her eyes. He frowned but didn’t say anything.
“Whatever, it's not my problem, right? I’ll get over it,” she said to no one in particular. “I need to focus on getting to Lawrence and being ready to go to the hospital tomorrow to pick up my badge and schedule.”
“I thought you had another week to get settled and everything?” Sam asked. Y/N shrugged.
“The busier I am, the less I think about things,” she replied, pouting. “If I’m going to get over my feelings about Dean, I need other things to focus on. Throwing myself into work is a good start. Setting up my new apartment will be a good second. Did you say it has a fireplace?”
The next morning
“I’m glad you came in today to get situated,” Dr. Montgomery said, escorting Y/N around the emergency room. “We can set up your locker and get you the necessary keys. Our dress code is ID’d scrubs, and while it will take a little while to get the embroidered ones with your name on them, you should be fine as long as you wear your ID badge. You don’t have to wear the white coat if you don’t want to… ”
“Mass trauma coming in!” the head nurse shouted. “City bus versus two cars. Unknown how many are hurt. Get the beds ready.” Everyone around them started to scramble, grabbing supplies and preparing the hospital beds for incoming patients. Doctor Montgomery looked over at Y/N, who was watching the organized chaos with barely controlled eagerness.
“Can you start early?” the doctor asked, causing Y/N to grin slightly.
“Just get me a clean pair of scrubs and some Crocs,” she replied. Doctor Montgomery nodded and ushered her toward the doctor’s lounge just as the first victims arrived. Grabbing a pair of teal scrubs and a pair of gray crocs, Y/N changed quickly and threw her items into an empty locker. She pulled her stethoscope out of her backpack and wrapped it around her neck before sliding a few pens into the pockets in her sleeves.
“Doctor Y/L/N,” a voice said, causing her to pause and turn around. A man stood in the doorway and held out a plastic badge to her. She took it and looked at the front, noticing her photo. She looked confused.
“Monty told me to give that to you. They took the photo you had on your driver’s license and used that to make a temporary ID so you can help out,” the man said. He flashed a bright smile toward her as she nodded. “I’m Damien, but everyone calls me DJ.”
“Y/N,” she said, clipping the ID to the front of her scrubs. DJ winked at her as they exited the doctor’s lounge.
“Welcome to Lawrence.”
The next few hours passed in a blur of patients, new nurses, and names she knew she’d never remember. Her once pristine makeup was now spotted with sweat, and her hair fell out of her once tidy bun. Y/N had just finished with a young girl who had a broken arm and a few lacerations that required stitches.
“Thank you so much, Doctor Y/L/N,” the weary and exhausted mother said as she cuddled her young daughter close to her. Y/N simply smiled and nodded, escorting them out of the emergency room. She made a few more notes in the chart in her hands before dropping them off at the desk nearby.
“What’s next?” she asked, sliding up to DJ, who reviewed the patient list. Just then, the doors burst open, and she watched as two paramedics brought in another patient… or rather, two patients. One was on the gurney, and the other was running alongside it.
“Dean?” Y/N questioned, watching as he ran past her.
“What have you got?” DJ asked, turning to walk with the gurney.
“Woman in her mid-thirties, BP is 175 over 96, the pulse is 120 and going up, she was trapped in one of the cars that was hit by the bus. They just got her out,” one of the paramedics rattled off. Y/N nodded as she listened and put on another pair of clean gloves. She frowned as she recognized Carmen on the gurney.
“She awake at all, or been unconscious the entire time?” Y/N asked.
“Boyfriend said she was awake for a few minutes but then blacked out and hasn’t woken up yet.”
“Trauma 2, make a hole, people!” DJ yelled, pushing the bed with them. Y/N hopped up on the gurney and started to do her checks. Suddenly, Dean was in the way, trying to get to Carmen.
“Dean, you gotta let me work,” Y/N said, pushing Dean’s hands away so she could get to Carmen and start an IV. “Dean, Stop! Fucking… DJ!!”
“On it,” the other doctor said, stepping away and pulling off his gloves. He stepped up to Dean and took a good look at him. Blood was coming from his hairline, and his eyes were wide and unfocused. The way he was holding his shoulder wasn’t good either. “C’mon, man, let’s get you checked out.”
“I gotta stay with Carmen,” he slurred out. Check another box for a possible concussion, DJ thought. Gently taking the moving arm Dean had, DJ pulled the man away.
“She’s in good hands with Doctor Y/L/N; why don’t we get you tended to? Does your head hurt you? What’s going on with this arm?” DJ tried again. Dean shook his head.
“I’m fine, lemme go.”
“Dude, don’t make me sedate you,” DJ said with a bit of humor. Just then, Y/N came from the curtained room and stood aside as they watched the bed rush off to the elevators.
“Don’t be a dick, Dean. You’re going to be no fucking good to her like this. Now get checked out, or I’m going to give DJ permission to sedate your ass and confine you to a bed,” Y/N snarked, her temper getting the best of her. DJ blinked at Y/N’s words to the patient.
“But, Carmen…”
“...is going up to surgery and will be there for a few hours, which means we can focus on your dislocated shoulder and that concussion you're most certainly sporting. Now, let DJ work on you, and I’ll call Sam and get him down here to help you. You’re gonna be no damn good to anyone acting up like this,” Y/N said, filling out a form on a clipboard. “DJ, if he gives you any more shit, you have my permission to sedate his ass.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted.
“I’m still listed on your emergency contacts next to Sam,” she said in a sing-song voice before walking away. Dean stared at her deliriously before looking up at DJ, who shrugged his shoulders.
“You heard her, man.”
Dean slowly woke up in an unfamiliar room to steady beeping. He cautiously looked around, wincing when his head protested the movement. Just then, the door to the room quietly opened, and he noticed that Y/N stuck her head inside.
“Looks like you got yourself a bed anyway,” Y/N said, walking into the dimly lit room. Dean grunted as he saw who it was. Sammy followed close behind.
“How you feeling there, big guy?” Y/N asked, looking at the monitors attached to Dean.
“Like I got hit by a city bus,” he groaned. Sam chuckled a bit, reaching over to squeeze Dean’s hand. Dean had a sling on one arm and a bandage on his forehead where the cut was made from the glass.
“At least you weren’t driving the Impala,” Sam said, causing Dean to grunt in agreement. Y/N studiously ignored the two, checking Dean’s vitals and making notes in the chart. The brothers chatted, and soon, Y/N was finished. She placed her hands on her hips as she faced them.
“Everything looks good,” she explained. “They will most likely keep you overnight for observation due to the severity of the concussion, which is normal, and I figure you’re going to want to be here anyway for Carmen. I arranged it so they can bring her here when she is out of recovery, and you two can share the room.” Surprise colored Sam’s expression while Dean stared at Y/N with worry.
“How is she?” he asked.
“She made it through the surgery just fine. They were able to isolate the internal bleeding and stop it, gave her some blood, and her vitals stabilized. She’s in recovery right now being monitored, and they should be coming down with her soon,” Y/N explained plainly.
“Oh, thank God,” Dean breathed. Y/N looked over at Sam and nodded her head.
“If there is anything else you need, just press the nurse’s button, and they can help you,” she explained, turning toward the door.
“Wait, you’re not staying?” Dean asked. Y/N paused and turned back toward the man lying in the bed. She would stay with them any time one of them had been hurt.
“I’ve got work to do, Dean,” she explained gently, her voice soft. “I need to check on other patients from the crash.”
“So, you work here now? When did that happen?” he asked, his voice getting angry. “When did we start keeping secrets from each other, huh? You’ve been acting off ever since you got here.”
“Me,” Y/N scoffed, placing a hand on her chest. “I’ve been acting off.”
“You’ve been distant, you aren’t staying with us, you barely talk to me anymore,” Dean ticked off. Sam placed a hand on his brother’s arm, trying to stop him from carrying on.
“Dean, c’mon man, now’s not the time,” Sam tried. Dean shook him off.
“You know you’ve noticed it, Sammy. She’s barely around us anymore; when she is, she clams up and barely speaks to us. What happened? We used to be best friends,” Dean said, looking at his brother. He turned to look at Y/N, staring at Dean, desperately trying to keep her emotions at bay. “You were my best friend. What happened to that?”
“Dean…” Y/N started but was interrupted.
“No, I don’t want to hear some stupid excuse. I want the truth, damnit,” Dean growled, a hand reaching his head. He leaned back onto the bed with his eyes closed, his breathing deepening as he tried to control the pain ricocheting in his head. Sam watched in sympathy as Y/N fought back overwhelming emotions, torn between lashing out and walking away.
“Oh, Dr. Y/L/N, you’re already here,” a voice said. “We were just about to have you paged.” She turned to the now open door and saw that two orderlies were bringing Carmen into the room as she slept off the anesthesia. She stepped out of the way and allowed them access to the opposite side of the room, watching as they connected the machines that would track her heart rate, blood pressure, and the like. Dean watched with interest the happenings in the room.
“Is she okay? Why isn’t she awake yet?” he asked nervously.
“She is still sleeping off the anesthesia,” Y/N answered quietly. One of the orderlies handed Y/N the chart just as a nurse walked in.
“Dr. Y/L/N,” the cheerful voice said. Y/N shot the kind nurse a smile. “You’re still here.”
“I was just visiting some friends who happened to be in the crash,” she said, making a few notes. “Carmen is doing well; will just need to sleep off the anesthesia.”
“Yes, doctor,” the nurse said, doing some checks on her own. Soon, both the orderlies and the nurse had left the room. Y/N took a deep breath and turned to look at Dean, who was eyeing Carmen with worry.
“Dean,” Y/N started quietly. “This isn’t the place to have the conversation you are so intent on having.” Dean turned away from Carmen and looked at her, confused.
“What?” he asked. Y/N just shook her head.
“Get some rest. I’ll check back in a bit.” Dean watched her nod her head, glance at Sam, and offer a sad smile before leaving the room. Then, he turned to look at his little brother suspiciously.
“You know what’s going on, don’t you?” he asked. Sam nodded.
“You really should have told her about Carmen sooner, is all I’m saying,” Sam explained. “She is heartbroken and feeling betrayed, yet she still took the job here to be close to us. What does that say? It’s gonna take a while for her to get over you, but she’ll be okay.”
“She was in love with me?” Dean asked, his voice hurt and distant.
“Is. Is in love with you,” Sam corrected.
“Why didn’t she say anything?”
“She was going to at the bar that night when she first got into town. Then you sprung Carmen on her, and she kept her mouth shut instead.”
“And you knew all of this.”
“Yep.”
“How?”
“She’s my best friend, Dean. Who do you think she’s gonna talk to?” Dean grew quiet, lost in thought about how he should handle things. This new information now confused him. Sure, he loved Y/N, but was he in love with her? No, of course not; he was in love with Carmen. Right? Right.
Right.
A quiet moan from the bed next to them caught their attention, and Dean’s introspection of his love life was put on hold as he tried to get up and check on his fiance. Despite everything, she still needed him to be strong for her as she had just come out of surgery for internal bleeding.
“Carmen,” he breathed as she opened her eyes.
Almost four hours later, Y/N finally had a moment to go back and check on Dean and Carmen. She quietly opened the door to the room and peeked her head in, finding both patients fast asleep. Sam looked up and smirked at her as she entered the room.
“Lemme guess,” she started quietly. “Someone gave the nurses a hard time and got his ass sedated.”
“Yup!” Sam answered cheerfully. The two shared a quiet laugh. Y/N walked to Dean’s side and gently ran her hand through his hair, looking at him affectionately. Dean shifted in his sleep, turning his head toward her, and the small gesture made her chest ache for something that was no longer hers.
“I want to hate him so badly,” she whispered. “I want him to be happy; I just thought that meant with me. The whole point of me taking this job was to be closer to you guys and to give us a real go of it. Instead, he found someone else. He couldn’t even tell me until I didn’t have a chance.”
“I told him everything,” Sam said softly. Y/N scoffed as she looked over at Sam, her shoulders dropping.
“Sam,” she complained.
“He needed to know,” he explained. Y/N shook her head.
“No, he didn’t. I would have come up with something that could have explained everything that didn’t include my emotional trauma,” she answered. “God, Sam.”
“Y/N…” he started.
“He’s gonna think I’m weak. He’s gonna think I’m pathetic.” Y/N’s eyes filled with tears.
“He doesn’t think either of those things.”
“Well, he should because I am weak and pathetic.”
“Y/N, this isn’t on you,” Sam explained. “This is on him. He’s the one who didn’t tell you about Carmen and, in turn, gave you false hope. You are allowed to feel betrayed and heartbroken. You are allowed to feel angry.”
“Oh, I feel angry. I'm angry at myself for ever believing this could have worked out in the first place,” Y/N whispered. Sam sighed. She looked at Dean for a long moment, then leaned over and kissed his temple.
“I need to get back to the ER. Call me if you need anything,” Y/N said to Sam with a smile. Sam simply nodded. “Love you bestie,” she said in a sing-song voice, causing Sam to chuckle.
“Yeah, love you too,” he responded.
Y/N stepped out of the room, her smile fading as the door clicked softly shut behind her. She stood in the hallway momentarily, taking a deep breath to steady herself. The quiet hum of the hospital around her was familiar and grounding, even as her emotions threatened to overwhelm her.
It wasn’t the first time she’d had to put her feelings aside for the sake of others, and it likely wouldn’t be the last. But this time, it hurt more than she thought it would. She’d come back to be close to them, to him. And yet, here she was, realizing that her place wasn’t by Dean’s side after all.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket, a reminder of the dozen other patients waiting for her care. With one last glance at the closed door, Y/N squared her shoulders and turned toward the ER. She had a job to do, and she wouldn’t let her heartbreak get in the way of helping people who needed her.
Back in the room, Sam watched as Dean stirred, waking slowly. Carmen’s soft breathing filled the space, her presence grounding him. Dean glanced at Sam, his eyes clouded with confusion and guilt.
“She was here, wasn’t she?” Dean asked, his voice rough from sleep.
“Yeah,” Sam said, keeping his tone even. “She’s got work to do, though. You know, saving lives and all.”
Dean let out a small, humorless laugh. “She always did have a way of putting everyone else first.”
Sam didn’t reply; he just leaned back in his chair and watched his brother carefully.
“She’ll be okay,” Sam said after a long pause. “She’s stronger than you think.”
Dean nodded but didn’t respond, his gaze shifting to Carmen. His hand moved instinctively to hers, squeezing gently. She was his future, and he knew he couldn’t let anything—or anyone—come between them.
Hours later, as Y/N’s shift finally ended, she checked on the brothers one last time before heading home for the night. It had been a quick 24-hour shift, and she was exhausted. Knocking on the door quietly, she walked into the room and saw that Sam was the only one awake again. She smiled at the younger brother.
“You sleep at all?” She asked him.
“A little,” Sam answered. “Dean got up and wanted to sit next to Carmen so we moved him over there. He’s been calmer since she woke up a few hours ago.” Y/N nodded and walked over to them to check on them.
“Speaking of Dean, I’ve decided something,” she said. Sam raised an eyebrow at his best friend in anticipation, worried that he wasn’t going to like the words that came out of her mouth next.
“I’m done waiting, Sam,” she said quietly, setting down the chart. She looked over at him with a sad smile. “Done hoping he’ll wake up and see me how I’ve always seen him. It’s not fair to him, to Carmen, or to me. I came here to start over, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
Sam frowned, concern clouding his face. “You’re not leaving, are you?”
She shook her head. “No. I’m staying. But like you said, I’m doing this for me. This job, this place — it’s a chance for me to build a life on my terms. I don’t need to run just because he doesn’t love me back the way I wanted. He’s still one of my best friends.”
Sam nodded. “You’re stronger than you think, Y/N.”
Y/N gave him a small, bittersweet smile. “I’m starting to believe that.”
The two of them sat silently for a moment, the soft hum of hospital machines filling the room. Finally, Y/N glanced at Dean one last time. He looked peaceful, his hand resting protectively on Carmen’s, even asleep. It was a picture of the life he’d chosen, which didn’t include her.
And that was okay. It had to be.
“I’m gonna head out and get some sleep. It was a long shift,” she said softly, pulling her bag onto her shoulder. “Tell him I was here if he asks.”
Sam stood and followed her to the door. “He’s gonna feel bad, Y/N.”
“Good,” she said with a faint smirk, her old fire returning momentarily. “But don’t let him dwell on it too long. He’s got what he wants.”
Sam grinned despite himself, then sobered. “You’re still my best friend, you know.”
“And you’re still mine,” Y/N replied, her voice warm. The two hugged before Y/N slipped out of the room and left the hospital.
Walking out to her car, she felt a strange sense of peace. The air was cool, and the stars were just beginning to peek through the darkening sky. She paused by her car, looking up at the vast expanse above her.
It would take some time for her to get over her romantic feelings for Dean, but they had been friends for a long time. She wouldn’t abandon decades of friendship because he chose another woman as his wife. But she was going to have to find closure on her own.
And as she drove home, she resolved to do just that.
Tomorrow would be another day—a day to heal, to grow, and to focus on what really mattered. She felt ready to let go for the first time in a long time.
And that was enough.