You guys deserve a break from Lily Peet and her white knights, so here’s the return of one of the fandom’s most infamous anticorns.
We all remember JawJoe, right? The guy on Fimfiction who wrote an edgy 22,553-word author tract story about Twilight wanting to cut off her wings, as well as an extremely long college essay style rant about how Magical Mystery Cure ruined the show forever? Well he’s back, this time with a 5-part mini-series about how Twilight’s Kingdom ruined the show even more. Clocking in at just over 4 hours (and you thought his MMC rant was long), the mini-series not only tears apart one of the most popular episodes of the entire show, but also features JawJoe over-analyzing many of the characters’ portrayals, complaining about the show’s morals (much like a certain cartoon reviewer), ranting about every single thing anticorns have ranted about (Hasbro, Meghan McCarthy, Alicorn Twilight, Equestria Girls, Starlight Glimmer, Flurry Heart, etc.), and completely trashing the entire brony fandom.
I really don’t understand why this guy dedicates so much time and effort towards discussing a show he now hates, especially since he could be using that time to work on more professional content (he currently writes novels according to his Fimfiction blog), but then again we are dealing with someone who’s completely off the rails in terms in insanity (even JawJoe himself admits that). If you have the patience to sit through all 5 of these videos and not have an aneurysm, you are a stronger person than I am.
So… JawJoe’s back? I have to say this was a needed addition to our blog. I wasn’t able to sit through most of that video because of a few factors:
1. It’s 5 AM and I’m not equiped with my laser focused snark yet.
2. At the beginning of this video you sent us, I had to turn away for a moment because I’m not sure if that was someone else’s video imitating the cringe members of the Bronies or if that was his actual setup… The guy’s a fucking slob! Little known fact: I have a sensitive gag reflex… I almost lost my lunch with all the macaroni on his table and when he dipped it in the coffee… MOVING ON!
3. The narration itself is boring, if I’m to assume that was JawJoe speaking… he sounds like he downed a bottle of antidepressants to get through this. And the delivery gives off a vibe that reminds me of “The Pissed Off Angry Gamer” (That Overweight Russian reviewer that compared the Gamecube’s disks to chocolate chip cookies) and Ben Stein… without the sense of irony.
4. If he had any humor in the video, I couldn’t find it. Any semblance of snark or any witty retorts, I wasn’t able to see it because the quality just put me off!
5. The fact he dedicated a five part, four hour video series to an episode that aired three years ago because of his undying grudge with Meghan McCarthy… He’s essentially preaching his Sonno-Joi (Revere the Emperor; Expel the Barbarians) philosophy on a new medium, ripe for the abuse. He wasted his life talking about a dead issue, adding more stress on his psyche just to convince people he’s right and they’re wrong and to prove that Anticorns are Superior whereas the Level-headed fans are inferior.
6. People actually like these videos… I mean entertainment is subjective, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure and all that but for the life of me, I couldn’t even sit through the fifth part! People actually gave this video a like and the fact that this could start a new Anticorn revolution is troubling, I’m probably going to lose Primo’s support after this but I wouldn’t be looking forward to reporting on a group of neckbeard cringe magnets protesting the premiere of the MLP movie because of all the events that led up to its inception.
In closing, I’ve been told that I’m rather chill in the heat and I have the patience of a saint… but I couldn’t stomach this “Revere the God Faust; Expel the She-Devil” propaganda for four hours! After this post is made, I’m certain old wounds will reopen but for now, I want to go back to sleep.
-JoJo
Post Script: Upon glance, it wasn't macaroni, it was cheetos. It was still gross when he dipped it in his coffee though.