#jbirthdays

[avengingxmarine]

Dean turns fourteen today.  He took off to the movies with a girlfriend.  I think her name was Katie.  Quite the ladykiller, that kid.  Like I was at his age.  Hell-raising, foul-mouthed, full of piss and vinegar.  Silas had it right: he's like me.  If I'm not careful with him, by the time he's twenty he'll have left a trail of kids and arrest warrants all over the country.

January 24th, 1993

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Dean's sixth birthday.  It's been more than a year since he saw me kill a shape-shifter.  He doesn't ask about it anymore.  And he stopped asking when he's going to go to school.  I tried to do it last fall, but I couldn't.  I just couldn't risk it.  Maybe this year, now that he's a little older, now that he knows a little more about things.  I've been teaching him.  Not the worst stuff, but enough so he knows that there are things that go bump in the night.

January 24th, 1985

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Sammy is twenty-one years old today. May he go and get hammered like the college student he is. Was there again last week to keep an eye on him, and he's got a new girlfriend.

May 2nd, 2004

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Sam's twentieth birthday. He's in California. Dean and I are packing up to get the hell out of Athens, Ohio, which as of this morning is free and clear of haunted sorority houses. I heard Dean talking about Sam on the phone earlier, but he didn't say anything about the conversation to me. I can't bring it up to Dean, either, especially not the mood he's been in. Usually after a hunt he's on fire, like the killing is a buzz. Today you can't talk to him. If I didn't know better, I'd think it was be-cause of a girl, but we've only been here a couple of weeks. It's not like Dean to fall hard for a girl that fast. He was spending a lot of time with a reporter—think she was a reporter. A looker.Could be anything, though. Hard to tell how he's reacting to Sam going AWOL. Dean's like me. He doesn't talk. He acts. We act.

May 2nd, 2003

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Dean turns twenty-four today. I was twenty-four when I married his mother. Sorry, kid. Every boy has to cut the apron strings sometime, and for you it's not going to be until we kill off a supernatural entity that seriously needs killing. Then we'll all be free of your mother's ghost. We'll be able to live normal lives. But maybe not. Maybe we've all been hunters too long now.

January 24th, 2003

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Sammy is eighteen years old today. Surprised he didn't take off. We're not getting along too well. He hunts when we need him to, but he's never committed himself the way Dean did. Dean's never known any other way to live, or if he has, he doesn't act like it. He's playing the role he was born to play. Sammy's the younger brother. He doesn't know what his role is, even though I can tell him until I'm blue in the face and we're both ready to kill each other. He's got one more year of school and then I'm drafting him full-time into the family business. I've given him more slack than I ever gave Dean, more than I would have ever gotten from my dad. He needed it. Now he's a grown man, or almost. Time for him to step into what's expected of him. Dean never even thought about college. We used to joke about it once in a while. But Sammy still believes he can have a normal life, but they're both more useful to the world as hunters than... what, lawyers? Dentists? Sammy's convinced himself that smart kids have to go to college. Part of my job is to convince him that college would be a waste of his smarts. And I gotta hand it to him on the brains front: there's nothing he can't find on the computer. I still dig around in actual books, libraries, newspapers. It's all keystrokes and search words for Sammy. He's done a good job hiding our trail on all the credit cards.

May 2nd, 2001

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Dean turns twenty-one today. I'd buy him a beer if I thought it would be something new. He's also old enough to buy his own guns now. I tried to raise him right, and looks like I did. He's a scam artist, a ladies' man, and an absolutely loyal son. He knows what's right and doesn't hesitate to do it. I'm proud of him. Now that he's hunting on his own I don't see as much of him, but I know he's out there. When I call him in on a job, he's right there every time. I've spent the last sixteen years afraid that I was going to screw him up somehow. Maybe now I can forget about that.

January 21st, 2000

John’s Journal

[avengingxmarine]

Sammy is sixteen years old today. God knows he's got plenty of torments. Now he's got a driver's license, too. Doesn't make much difference. He's known how to drive since he was nine.

May 2nd, 1999 John’s Journal