ok but what if, scarred toma x reconstructive scar treatment specialist isaac au! where you as a clinician know you cant meet your clients expectations of clear skin but over the time yous spend together you help fix his perspective………and he's also hot and you fall in love <3
thank you so fucking much for this literally thought about it for my entire shift to the point that i didnt notice a customer talking to me
toma probably gets referred to me by another doctor and when he comes in for the first time he just has the most timid and miserable aura and he wont lift his head or look me in the eye and i try not to stare and keep my eyes on his file as we go through some basic stuff and i explain the first steps of treatment. he’s so nervous and playing with his hair and at the end of the appointment i offer him a lollipop that i keep in case a patient is younger and he picks out my favorite flavor and when i tell him he finally looks at me and gives me this sweet smile like “really?!” but once he realizes he drops his head again and thanks me and before he leaves i just. i dont know what it is but something in my gut makes me give toma my personal number and i tell him to call or text me if he has any questions or concerns and i dont hear from him until after an appointment going over his labwork, he texts me at like 2am freaking out over some article he read about stuff that can damage skin and i just happen to be awake and debunk it for him and he is so relieved and texts me every so often with other articles he wants to fact check.
from the start im very honest about how far treatment will probably be able to take him and he’s obviously bummed about it and sniffles but understands even if its frustrating and disheartening, and i tell him another doctor might make all sorts of promises but i wont and he appreciates it and decides to stick with me. But a really big part of all my treatment plans are like self-compassion and confidence boosting things so as we start the treatment plan im also working on that with him. it starts out simple like correcting him to use neutral language when talking about himself and also just engaging with him in more casual conversation to get him more comfortable with it since its sooo obvious that he’s just starved for connection.
and it does slowly start to help him, along with the improvements with his scars & skin. he accidentally calls me and apologizes when i pick up but im on break so i start asking him how he’s been and after that sometimes he’ll call with questions instead of texts, and then sometimes he’ll text just to say hello. its not everyday but its multiple times a week we talk about nontreatment related topics. i have to inspect his skin one day and i caress his face for a little too long and we both blush when i pull away and he laughs and i can only think about how i want to hear it again
and then one day he comes in and i am being really awkward and im like Uhm. so i saw in your file that ur birthday was coming up and got you these. i though they’d compliment your eyes. i hope im not overstepping. and i give him some barrettes and he’s so excited and blushes but then like goes pale bcuz. Well he’s always hiding behind his hair and these would take that cover away from him and i gently tuck some of his hair behind his ear and am like. Why not just try them on here and if you hate it i can take them back. and he agrees and i help him put them in and when he looks at himself he flinches at first but then is like…Woahhh. bcuz its finally something that makes him feel a little more himself and human and he keeps them. and he wears them to every appointment after that. and since then he’s started to style his hair more and try new outfits and take back some autonomy that he’s been lacking. he sends me pictures sometimes of new clothes on him but never sends any of his face when he says he’s trying out a makeup look. but he does tell me that he’s having fun with it which is all i can ask for.
one day he shows up when he doesnt have an appointment to bring me a drink and its hot chocolate bcuz he doesnt know how i like my coffee and he’s so nervous and cute and i have to be like its okay i love hot chocolate and my coworkers are just staring like Oh my god…and they tease me some after he leaves.
a few months into treatment toma misses an appointment without calling to cancel and i get so worried that i look up his address from his file and show up to his place after work and he’s wrapped up in a blanket and hiding himself and is so surprised but still lets me in and he’s just hit a wall. he went out and people pointed and whispered at him and he just knows it was bcuz of his face and he’s crying about how he’ll never not look like a freak and i rub his back and comfort him and let him cry on my shoulder and reassure him that there isnt anything about him that’s freakish and remind him of all the progress he’s made in terms of the treatment and his mental state. i leave without getting him to look me in the eye but its okay because i was able to get him to name some things about himself that he likes.
and things continue to go up for the most part, he still has bad days but they dont totally destroy him as much anymore but…there’s nothing really left in the treatment that requires us to be having appointments as frequently, his care can be transferred back to a primary care and only needs to come back to me if there are any issues with his scars or medication.
and when i tell him that he gets really weepy and starts to cry and thank me for everything ive done for him and he goes to leave but stops to turn and ask me if he can still call me with any questions and i tell him of course. and his lip quivers and he quickly turns away and goes for the door but before he can turn the doorknob i grab his wrist and pull him back some and then we get to have this great big bl moment where im like…I know there’s not much left i can dk for you as a doctor, but as a man..? and toma’s eyes get really big and he’s like really? are you sure— do you really mean it? and all i can do is smile and nod my head and my nose is stinging as he smiles so big at me he’s like so seriously shining and then he kisses me bcuz im too distracted staring at him to make the first move.
and then we live happily ever after [:
that is at least most of what i thought about while i was at work. yayyy lets play with isaac and toma like dolls together ^_^
