in which your boyfriend, jungkook, has always had a massive fuckin’ size kink. but today, something snaps in him when he watches as your stomach creates a huge bulge as he’s fucking so deeply, into you. and let’s just say, that was the moment that led to the decision of him impregnating you right there and then.
You slowly lowered yourself onto his cock, both of you moaning loudly as he stretched you open again, for the 3rd time tonight.
His hands gripped your hips tightly, helping you take him inch by inch. “That's it... fuck... take it all baby.” He hit bottom inside of you, making your stomach bulge again.
“Fuuuck, look at that..” He groaned, watching you take his entire length. He started guiding your hips up and down, maintaining a rhythm.
Jungkook had two obsessions in this world. The first one being the obvious, you.
And the second? The time during sex when he watches as his 9 inch cock penetrates into you, having you crying before his cock is even fully plunged into your cunt.
“Bounce on my cock baby, let me see you use me.” He slapped your ass lightly. “You wanted to ride me, yeah? Fuck, you're so pretty bouncing on my dick like this.” His stomach pressed against yours.
Jungkook's eyes dropped immediately to your bouncing breasts as you rode him, his mouth watering. The sight of your nipples swaying with each bounce made his cock throb violently inside you. “Fuck... look at these fuckin’ tits,” he growled, reaching up to pinch and roll your nipples between his fingers. “So pretty... fucking hypnotic.”
“Nghh—hm! Koo!— please. Wan’ your m-mouth.” You cry out, tears falling from your eyes as the immense pleasure was becoming too intense to handle.
“So fuckin’ greedy. But anything for my princess..” He leaned forward, wrapping his lips around your bouncing nipple just as he slammed his hips up into you, hitting your deepest spot.
“Mmmff..” He sucked hard, flicking his tongue over the sensitive bead while his cock wrecked your pussy, “Gonna ruin this beautiful fuckin’ body. Every part of you is mine. Fuckin’ mine.” He slapped your ass hard, resulting in a wince.
“Mmh!— wait! T-too big, please—!” You try to cry out, but it’s useless.
He’s a fucking goner.
“N-no— You can take it, princess... you were made for my massive dick,” he groaned, releasing your nipple with a wet pop.
He thrusted up harder, making you scream as the huge bulge in your stomach grew deeper. “Shhh... don't fight it, hm? Let kookie stretch this little pussy out.” He gripped your hips, forcing you all the way down.
“How is it— fuckin’ possible that I fuck this pussy every, fuck, day. A-and yet, you’re still s’fucking tight.” He barely lets out, his head lolls back as he starts seeing stars.
“K-kookie!— gonna cum! wanna— t-together.” You manage to stutter.
“Yeah? Where’d you want me, pretty girl?”
“I-inside— please!”
His eyes darkened instantly at your desperate plea. "Fuck. Want me to breed you? Yeah? Is that it?” He repeated, thrusting up savagely, intensely. Almost as if he’s fuckin’ angry.
"Gonna fill this pretty pink pussy until you're dripping with my cum? Want daddy's baby inside this tight cunt?" He slapped your ass hard, pulling your hips down to meet his thrusts. “P-please say yes, angel. Say yes and l'Il bury my cum s’deep inside of you. so deep inside..”
You could barely let out a word, your head barely nodding yes as you could feel his cock repeatedly abuse your sensitive spot inside you.
“Fuuuck yes...” He flipped you both over suddenly, pinning you beneath him, his cock buried even deeper now. “Hold onto kookie, yeah?... gonna breed this pussy so good.” He started pounding relentlessly, his stomach smacking against yours.
“Feel that? That's my dick, baby.... needa fill this empty womb.”
“Gonna pump you so full of my fat cock and my cum.... gonna make you so fucking pregnant,” he snarled, his hips moving rapidly. His massive length slamming into you over and over, the sound of his skin slapping against yours was filling the room, “This pussy is mine... gonna lock my baby inside it.”
“Please!— can’t hold it any l-longer! N-need you to cum r-right now!”
Nails digging into your thighs, he lifted your legs over his shoulders. The new angle allowed him to pound even deeper, making your stomach bulge obscenely with his dick. “Such a good girl... begging so nicely to be fuckin’ bred.”
"Not stopping... never gonna fuckin'stopp... milk my cock, princess." His hips pounded into you relentlessly, the head of his cock grinding against your g-spot, “Cum for me... make a mess on this fat cock while I breed you.”
Finally, he buried himself balls deep inside your already sensitive pussy, his hot, thick cum leaking out of you continuously.
“T-take it, fuvck... C-can’t let it leak—” His eyes scan the porn scene beneath him, immediately pushing back his cum into you.
His hips jerked with each spurt, making your stomach bulge even more visible.
“Shit. You’re definitely getting pregnant after that.”
so… I had a dream, woke up and am ovulating.. okay? let a girl live 🥹 also FIRST and FUCKING LAST time am I ever editing the whole drabble into smaller font because holy fuck does it take time. Also I did not proof read.. wrote this literally 45 minutes ago so any grammar mistakes will not be mentioned 💗 lmk ur thoughts bcs this is the first ever smut drabble I’ve made!! i tried to be as detailed as possible and that’s not really something I usually do!! so lmkkkk!!!!!! ;))
hi nyla baby I miss you! ;( 😓 can’t wait for bbv13 hehe
HELLO SWEET SASHA !!
i miss you like always, not a single day goes without me missing you 🤭 and i'm so excited for you to read bbv chap 13 and i'm gonna work extra hard to post it asap, can't wait to hear your thoughts mwahh
in which your nerd boyfriend attempts to help you study for an upcoming examination. but unfortunately him, his glasses and the fact that you’re ovulating is getting in the way, big time.
pairing : nerd!jungkook x fem!oc
warnings : bigdick!jungkook, he’s a big talker, he’s a dom but he switches the moment he finds out she wants to take control, so kinda sub!koo ( jus a lil tho ) yearning koo, they both beg for each other, titty worshipping, she gives him head and he’s absolutely whipped for her, koo’s a big talker and he loves her so much :( mentions of breeding, breeding kink, he cums in her ( wrap it uppp )
a/n : jus a lil drabble I whipped up yesterday ;)) trust me on this and loop the song 'glory box'. also literally say absolutely nothing about the law related questions im a law major so this was the first thing I thought of & if anything is wrong.. don’t even… im crying in college enough 😢. LOL jk. happy reading! x
today’s problem? revision for the upcoming law exam you have on monday.
you’re trying to focus, you swear.
but it really doesn’t help when you have a boyfriend that is both good-looking and smart, in front of you all the goddamn time.
you’re simply staring at your lamp on the desk casting an annoying glow over your thick law textbooks that are spread out between you.
your boyfriend, jungkook, was leaning over a pile of notes, his voice low and steady as he broke down the difference between tort law and contract law.
and god were you distracted.
he looked good. too good.
the black compression shirt he was wearing left nothing to the imagination, hugging his chest and shoulders in a way that made it impossible to breathe.
he’s also wearing the baggy grey sweatpants you bought for him a year ago. the only thing you regret, was not buying him a tighter fitting one.
and the worst fucking part. those glasses.
the thin frames sat low on the bridge of his nose, making him look focused and intelligent. just your fucking type.
he looked completely out of reach, and that just made absolutely no sense considering you’re his girlfriend.
"so, you don’t need to have a written agreement to sue someone in tort, both parties... are you listening, bun?"
his voice drifted over you, but the actual words weren't sinking in.
all you could hear was the rhythm of his breathing and the scratch of his pen against the paper.
you shifted in your seat, your thighs pressing together as a dull, heavy ache started to settle deep in your core.
the grey sweatpants he was wearing hung low on his hips.
and every time he moved, you caught a glimpse of the tattoos peeking out from under his sleeves.
shit. you don’t know how much longer you can take.
"i'm trying, koo,” you whispered, your voice sounding thick even to your own ears. "it's just... i can't focus. my head is everywhere."
jungkook let out a soft, patient sigh, rubbing the back of his neck.
he looked at you with those big, doe eyes, softened by the lenses of his glasses.
"i know you hate this chapter," he murmured, softly. "but i promise, once we get through this chapter, it’ll be worth it. you're gonna ace your test on monday, m’kay?"
he was being so sweet, so sweet, and it only made the tension in your body feel more unbearable.
you looked at him, then let your gaze drop to his lap before quickly snapping your eyes back up to his.
"what if... what if i sit somewhere else? maybe i'll be able to concentrate better if i'm closer," you suggested, your heart hammering against your ribs.
jungkook tilted his head, a small, knowing smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "oh yeah? and where exactly did you have in mind?"
you didn't say anything, just looked down at his lap again.
he let out a tiny, breathless laugh, shaking his head slightly. "you wanna sit on my lap? is that it?"
you nodded rapidly, biting your lip to keep from whining out loud.
"you promise you'll pay attention if i let you?" he asked, his tone still soft.
he’s always soft with you.
you nodded again, your hands gripping the edge of your chair.
"mm. okay then. whatever you want, bun," he said, pushing his chair back just enough to make room.
he opened his arms wide, a small, inviting gesture. "c'mere."
you didn't need to be told twice. you scrambled over, settling yourself onto his thighs.
you could immediately feel the hardness beneath you, his cock protruding slightly.
the fabric of his sweatpants was slightly rough against your skin.
“you comfortable?" he asked, his hands finding your waist immediately.
"mhmm," you breathed out, reaching back to grab his tattooed arm and pulling it firmly around your waist, holding him against you.
his thumb slipped just an inch under the hem of your tank top, his skin hot against your bare waist. he started to caress the skin there in slow, rhythmic circles.
he picked the pen back up and pointed at the page again, resuming his explanation.
surprisingly, it worked for a second.
just a second, though.
with him right there, his voice vibrating through your back, you actually managed to focus.
“alright, do I need to have a written agreement to sue someone in tort?” he questioned, eyes on you.
“no. right? tort law applies even between two strangers, for example when two people get into an accident, both drivers are able to sue without a written agreement.”
you let the words flow out of your mouth naturally.
"there we go! good girl," he praised softly, his breath hitting the shell of your ear.
“see, I told you. you just needed a little more practice, bun.”
he was praising you, and you were simply breaking.
the words sent a shiver down your spine. that simple praise was the ultimate breaking point.
the wetness between your legs became impossible to ignore, a heavy pulse that needed to be dealt with.
he continued talking and without thinking, your hips began to move. just a slightly. you were testing the friction.
jungkook didn't stop talking at first, but his thumb stopped circling your waist. it pressed down, firm and steady.
you moved again, a little faster this time, your breath hitching as you felt his hard cock beneath the sweatpants.
his voice wavered. "...and the... the court ruled that... bun, stop moving so much."
you didn't listen. you couldn't. you just hummed a small, quiet sound of protest and kept grinding down, your eyes fluttering shut.
the room went silent. the only sound was the the soft friction of fabric against fabric.
jungkook quietly set the pen down on the desk. he wasn't looking at the book anymore.
he was looking at you.
he could see the way your hands were white.
from gripping your own kneecaps as you tried to chase the feeling.
both of his hands moved to your waist now, his grip tightening to steady you, to keep you from sliding off.
"b-baby..." he whispered, his voice breaking slightly.
"mm, you promised you'd listen, hm? what're you trying to do to me, pretty girl?"
you let out a broken whine, your head falling back against his shoulder.
your skin was flushed, and the ache was becoming too much to handle.
"m' sorry," you managed to choke out, your eyes still tightly shut. "just— been thinking about this all night. can't... can't really think right now."
jungkook groaned, a low, guttural sound that started deep in his chest. he leaned forward, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
"f-fuck— bad… bad fucking girl.” he murmured, his teeth grazing your skin just enough to make you gasp.
he didn't push you off. instead, he shifted his weight, his hands sliding from your waist down to your hips, guiding your movements.
“you’re gonna be the death of me, you know that? hm?” he whispers, throwing his head back as you grind faster, keeping a steady pace.
“n-need to feel you closer, kookie. please?”
he absolutely loses it.
how could he not? when his girl is whining and begging for his cock so sweetly.
“y-yeah, mm. take this off f’me pretty.”
his hands push at your waist, making you stand in front of him, impatiently turning you around as he slides your tiny shorts off of you.
his actions are slow, his hands rest at your waist, pulling you closer. his eyes looking up at you, innocently.
your fingers habitually move to under his chin, tilting his head upwards at you even more.
he takes this opportunity to drive you even crazier, kissing your bare waist as his eyes never leave yours.
“s-stop, staring at me like that.”
“like what, baby?” he says in between kisses.
“like you— fuck!” you yell, the moment you feel his hands strip down your underwear.
he immediately kisses up your pubic bone, and around your pussy, ever so softly. but he never touches you were you want to be touched.
not yet.
your fingers entangle in his hair, pulling him away despite the pleasuring feeling.
you drop to your knees abruptly, getting wetter at the sight of his glasses resting on his slightly puzzled face.
“wanna take care of you— please you. thank you, for helping me. can I? please, kookie? pretty please, with a cherry on top?”
you plead, softly. you’re doing that thing with your voice that you always do whenever you want something to go your way.
does it work?
jungkook throws his head back, letting out a whine. before pulling his thick cock out from his black underwear.
your hands immediately find its way around his length, teasing. not touching.
“uh— please bun. mm. want your mouth, or your hands. or— fuck, anything. just.. please do something before actually lose my mind. please baby. please.”
yeah, it does work.
you hear him plead and you swear the world starts spinning, your vision gets blurry the moment you spit on his cock and lick up his length.
“f-fuck… baby, shit. y-our mouth, p-please. take it, please.” he begs.
you let yourself finally swallow his cock, but you barely make it halfway. you’ve not even reached the halfway mark, and tears are already forming.
“uh… you’re not even halfway there, baby. shit you’re fucking tiny. t-taking my cock so well, taking care of me so well, bun.”
his hands gently hold your hair up and into a ponytail, slightly pushing down as you start to bob your head a little faster.
you feel your pussy dripping onto his white marble floor as you hear his pleads, you take it as a sign to move faster, using your hands to knead his balls.
and you know that that was the move the moment you feel his cock twitch inside of your mouth.
“princess— gonna fucking, cum. want you to swallow it yeah? think you can do that f’me?”
you simply nod, whining slightly at his words.
his words causing you to bite down slightly near the tip of his cock, making him release instantly.
“fuck! fuck!” he throws his head back as he pushes your head even deeper, spilling into your mouth.
you release your mouth from his cock, hearing a ‘pop’ sound.
you quickly swallow his release, sticking your tongue out to show him you swallowed everything.
he mutters a quiet ‘fuck’ under his breath and wraps his hand gently around your throat to pull you up for a messy kiss.
he wastes no time, using his tattooed arms to lift you up and throw you onto his bed.
he pulls your tank top down, immediately taking a nipple into his mouth. swirling, sucking, using his teeth.
“nghh— kookie! mm, w-wait! s-low down!” you whine, back arching 180 degrees as he spits onto the other nipple, giving it an equal amount of attention.
jungkook has always seen you as picturesque. but today, fuck. it was different.
“look at these fucking tits. s-shit— so full f’ me. can’t wait to make you a mama, suck these babies dry and make you keep producing milk until you physically can’t anymore.”
you fucking lose it.
“yeah? you like that? hm? like the thought of me putting a baby in you? I fucking would baby, I want to. so bad.” he whispers, kissing down your body.
“kookie— i, I can’t anymore! I need you, please. please, need you inside me.” you whine, your gut clenching as your back arches at the act of nothing.
his mouth is hovering over your pussy, you could feel his hot breath so clearly. his eyes look up at you. his eyes were practically burning into yours.
“needa stretch this pussy out first, yeah? m’ too big for you, baby.”
your head shakes quickly, as your hands reach out for nothing.
“n-no! please, I c-can take it. really can’t wait anymore, k-koo. please. please. please.” you cry out, his face now on top of yours.
“a-are you, fucking crying?” he whispers.
“baby, fuck. you’re crying for my cock? crying because you need me inside of you so bad?”
he couldn’t believe it, no matter how many times he fucked you, you always end up surprising him.
every. single. time.
“fuck, I’ll fill you up to the brim, bun. that’s a promise.” his voice breaks, as he positions his cock at your entrance.
he finally, pushes into you.
“kookie!” you yell, your cunt stretching open as he’s barely inside of you.
“not even halfway in, bun. loosen up around me please. you’re gonna make me fucking nut already.”
his hands hold your hips gently, but firmly. his thumbs caressing your lower abdomen as he pushes into you a-bit more.
“fffuccckkkk.” you whine.
“t-too, big! wait!” you cry out, but he doesn’t care. he pretends not to.
“I’m— sorry, bun. just a little more, m’kay? doing so well f’ me. gonna fuck you so well, pretty.”
without warning, he slams the remaining of his length into you.
and you immediately fucking cum around him.
“ngh! kookie!”
“what the fuck— baby. did you just fucking cum?”
he glasses almost slid off, not before he pushed it back up, and leaned down to attack your lips into another messy kiss.
“mm, m-move, please.” you whisper.
he doesn't say a word. he just lets out a jagged, shaky breath against your lips and starts to move.
he’s slow at first, pulling out until he’s almost gone before sliding back in. deep.
"you're so tight, baby. fuck, relax around me.” he groans, his voice vibrating through your entire body. "I fuck this pussy all the time and you’re still so fucking tight, huh?"
you can feel the tattoos on his arms flexing as he braces himself over you.
the glasses are still perched on his nose, slightly crooked now, and the sight of him looking so put together while he's fucking you senseless is too much.
you reach up, your fingers trembling as you try to pull him closer, wanting to feel the weight of his chest crushing yours.
"faster, koo... please," you sob out, your head tossing back and forth against the pillows.
he obeys.
his cock moves faster. his balls smacking against your puffy clit as the tip of his cock reaches your cervix.
“f-feel me up here, bun? feel me fucking up inside of y-ou?”
his hand shakily rests on your lower abdomen, trying to feel the bulge his cock is creating.
“s-so d-eep, koo!”
“mhm, gonna split you open pretty. you’d like that, yeah?”
his hands grab the back of your thighs to pull you even closer.
“was your plan all along wasn’t it? wore that tiny tank top and shorts on purpose. r-right?”
“mhm!”
his cock’s starting to get slippery, and he feels his orgasm creeping upon him.
the knot in your stomach’s starting to get tighter, as you listen to him talk.
“c’mon baby, you can do it. shittt. fuck—“
his hips move faster, as his cock pushes even deeper inside of you.
you feel his tip brutally pound your cervix as you watch the glasses fog up slightly.
“gonna fill you up s’ good pretty. needa make sure my cum sticks, yeah? gonna cum s’ deep inside this pretty pussy until you’re dripping, wanna have to push it back inside of you.”
you feel his cock twitch inside of you before you feel hot liquid coat your velvet walls evenly.
“fuck! bun— fuck fuck!” he yells, pushing his twitching cock deeper inside as spurts of cum ooze out of and into your pussy.
he quickly brings his fingers towards your puffy clit and circles it sloppily. and that. that was your last fucking breaking point.
“baby— kookie, I’m gonna, gonna cum!” you feel yourself starting to let go, as your hands grip onto his biceps.
“cum around my cock, pretty. please”
your body arches, as your pussy sucks his cock in for the last time, as you milk him dry.
he immediately kisses up your body and captures his lips with yours. sucking and pulling at your already swollen lips.
he pulls back just enough to look at you, his glasses slightly lopsided and his eyes softened.
"you okay, bun?" he whispers, his voice still a little wrecked.
he doesn't wait for an answer before he’s reaching out to brush the damp hair away from your forehead, his touch so careful it almost makes you want to cry again.
he shifts, sliding out of you with a soft, wet sound that makes you hiss, before pulling you flush against his side and tucking you under the duvet.
his tattooed arm settles firmly around your waist, pulling you back against his chest until there isn't a single inch of space left between you.
"i've got you," he murmurs, his lips pressing a lingering kiss to the back of your shoulder. "i've got you, baby."
your textbooks are still open on the desk, the lamp still casting that annoying glow over the notes you were supposed to be memorizing.
he sighs slightly, “you were supposed to be focusing. you know?”
his words earned a soft giggle out of you, “m’sorry. couldn’t help myself. but m’ glad you fucked me instead.”
his lips curve upwards slightly, chuckling.
before rolling his eyes at you playfully and using his fingers to gently close your eyes.
“yeah. of course you are.”
( got a lil lazy after proofreading and stopped in the middle so please ignore literally any mistakes & pretend you saw absolutely nothing ill give you a fat kiss if you do 🥺 )
in which y/n is the new hire at a psychiatric ward and foolishly volunteers for the one patient everyone else is deadly afraid of. no therapist has ever lasted in his presence, and jungkook doesn't take them seriously to begin with. and since her staff doesn't take her seriously either, nobody expects her to survive. so next week, she gets fifty minutes to prove them all wrong.
genre : psycho!jungkook x therapist!oc
warnings : harsh & foul language, threatening, stereotyping, this plot starts off with misogyny since her job is male dominated ( but oc is a bad bitch wbk so she shuts their asses up ), gore related conversations, ptsd from DMV households, verbal harassment ( not from jk ), heavy obsessive & possessive vibes, unprotected sex, bigdick!jk, she sucks his dick so so good, breeding kink, ALOT of dirty talk bcs by now yall should know he’s a talker, he’s a munch, creampie, nipple play, nipple kink + more to add as I progress while writing this fic & there might be changes to warnings that are already stated above.
my notes : after long consideration, I’ve finally decided that psycho!jk & therapist!oc will be making their appearance on my blog!!!! super fucking excited for this one since this baby has been in my docs for the last 6 MONTHS. I’ve laughed, cried, punched a wall, fainted & kicked my feet while trying to make this fic work, and I’m so so glad it’s finally happening!! this is genuinely my personal favourite fic of mine yet!! & I’m so excited for you guys to read it once it’s out. it’ll take some time, but the wait will be worth it!!
ꫂ᭪݁ taglist is currently CLOSED — see you in the fic. 🖤
in which you and jungkook have the most bipolar, obsessive and insufferable friends with benefits situation-ship ever. It’s obviously toxic, but neither of you — especially him, wants to own up to it. you fight, you argue, and then you fuck to make up. it’s fucking messy, and hella tiring. but hey … the messier the better, right?
genre : smau!, friends with benefits.
warnings : harsh language, he calls oc a b!tch ( STAND TF UP), jealousy issues, dirty talk, obsessive behaviour, major mixed signals, koo's lowkey a master manipulator.
a/n : ALSO UGH I KNOW THE TYPO for “who’s” in the first pic but unfortunately your girl is too lazy to change it to “whose” so just ignore it 😣 i just desperately needed to write a toxic koo in an smau ver because it's been like FOREVER since l've made an smau teeheeee!
in which you’re in a situation ship with a guy that pushes you away with his words but pulls you back in with his touch. your “relationship” is practically just a bunch of misunderstood late night calls and unread texts that always ends with him pounding on your front door. he's never clear with what the both of you are, and he’s never transparent with the way he feels. so, the only thing that's left to wonder... is what the fuck does he actually mean?
warnings : jungkook is a manipulative bitch. ( slightly though ) vulgar language. oc has like zero self respect. ( STAND UPP ladies ) unprotected sex. nipple play. breeding kink. bigdick!jk. he’s way too big for her and he makes sure she knows. he cums in her. he uses another girl to make oc jealous. ( kinda?? )
a/n: hi... okay so while writing this I may have gotten carried away with the whole concept and changed A LOT of stuff, so some of the description may be different from the one from my teaser. ANYWAYS IMPORTANT : do play the two songs requested when mentioned because those songs curate the whole vibe and will a 100 percent make you're reading experience more enjoyable and you WILL feel your heart ache, ( or at least I hope ), this was originally not supposed to be mainly focused on plot, but your girl got too carried away and well... here we are! I so so hope you enjoy!! thank you for being so patient and waiting for me. happy reading! <33
jungkook: come over
here we go.
you roll onto your side, thumb hovering over the glass. your chest feels tight, that familiar ache of wanting to give in and wanting to scream at him at the same time.
you: no.
the bubbles appear instantly. he’s hovering. he’s waiting.
jungkook: why are u being so difficult?? just come over
you sit up, the sheets pooling around your waist. you think about the instagram story you saw three nights ago.
the loud music you could practically fucking hear through the screen, the way some girl's arm was brushed against his shoulder while he laughed at something his friend said.
he looked like he didn't have a care in the world while your "where are you?" texts went unread for hours.
you: how am i being difficult when you barely could explain what happened a few nights ago??
jungkook: for fucks sake. i told you nothing happened, and i was going to come over later that night. shit just got carried away.
you: yeah but you didn’t. so until you tell me the truth, i ain’t coming over for shit. goodbye.
you toss the phone face down. you know what comes next. he’ll call. he’ll say he got carried away, again. he’ll say his friends made him stay, and then beg for me to forgive him.
it’s the same cycle. he pushes you away with his silence, leaves you wondering where you stand, and then the second you start to build a wall, he tries to kick it down.
he wants you close enough to touch, close enough to have, but never close enough to actually hold onto.
your phone buzzes again. then again.
you pick it up. it isn't a text this time. it's a picture.
it’s a blurry picture of his calvin klein sweatpants that you bought for him.
his length clearly hard, his hand just barely placed right above it.
then a voice note follows.
you press play, and his voice is low, scratchy with sleep or maybe something else.
"don't be like that," he mutters, the sound of a lighter flicking in the background. "i'm literally begging. just let me come over. please."
well, fuck.
the "please" is what actually kills you.
it’s the only time he sounds like he belongs to you, and you hate how easily it works.
he acts like he doesn't care if you stay or go, but the moment you actually head for the door, he’s blocking the damn exit.
you look at your front door, then back at the phone. what are you even fucking doing?
you: I’m upset, jungkook. can’t you tell?
jungkook: I know. so let me make it up to you, baby. I’m coming to yours rn. leave the lock open.
you : fine.
he doesn't bother asking, he just decides. and that’s the problem.
and of course. of course, you're already reaching for the remote to buzz him in.
the sound of his heavy boots echoing in the quiet hallway makes your stomach flip.
knock. knock. knock.
"open up, baby.” he mumbles, his voice vibrating through the door. "know you’re there."
you pull the door open just a crack, and he doesn't even wait. he pushes his way in.
he kicks the door shut with his heel and immediately crowds you into the wall, his large hands coming up to cup your face before you can even get a word out.
"hey," he whispers, his nose brushing against yours. his eyes are dark, searching yours with a look that’s so soft it feels like a lie.
"jungkook, stop," you say, your voice coming out way weaker than you wanted.
you put your hands on his chest, feeling the steady thud of his heart through his hoodie. "we need to talk. you didn't even explain about the other night and i'm not just gonna—"
"shhh," he breathes, cutting you off with a lingering kiss on your temple. "don't do that. not right now, hm?”
he starts kissing the side of your face, his lips grazing your jawline.
every time you try to turn your head away, he just follows, his thumbs rubbing small circles into your cheeks. it’s so frustratingly gentle.
it’s the jungkook that makes you forget all the red flags.
"i'm still upset," you whisper, even as your eyes flutter shut. "you can't just come here and act like everything is fine. i need communication, jungkook. i need you to actually tell me what happened."
he pulls back just enough to look at you, his thumb catching your bottom lip and tugging it down. "i know, i know baby. i’ll tell you everything you want to know, okay? just... not now."
he leans down, finally capturing your lips in a kiss that tastes like a promise he probably won't keep.
it’s deep and slow, his tongue slicking against yours until your knees feel like they’re going to give out. your hands, which were supposed to be pushing him away, are now fisted in the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer.
"i know you're mad," he murmurs against your mouth, his hands sliding down your back to hook under your thighs, lifting you up so you have to wrap your legs around his waist.
"why don't you take this off for me? let me take care of you. make you feel good.”
you let out a shaky breath, your resolve crumbling into a million pieces. he carries you to the bedroom, the room only lit by the dim light of the streetlamps outside.
he lays you down like you’re something precious, hovering over you while he watches you struggle with the hem of your shirt.
"that's it," he praises, his voice dropping an octave as he watches the fabric fall away. "so pretty for me. you have no idea how much i thought about this while i was out."
he doesn't rush. he spends forever just worshiping your skin, his mouth exploring every inch of your neck and collarbone. he’s a talker, just like always.
"you like that, don't you? can feel your heart racing," he whispers, his hands moving down to unbutton your jeans. "tell me you missed me. tell me you wanted me here."
you just groan, your head hitting the pillow as he works his way down. he's so focused, so intent on making you feel every single thing.
when he finally moves between your legs, his hands are firm but careful, spreading you open.
"look at me," he commands softly. you open your eyes, seeing him look up at you from between your knees. "gonna make you forget why you were even shouting at me earlier, hm? gonna make you feel good. that’s what you deserve, yeah?”
and he does. his tongue is precise, findng exactly what you need, his fingers working in perfect sync.
he’s talking the whole time, multiple praises and dirty whispers that make your toes curl.
"yeah, just like that— fuck, you’re so wet for me, baby. keep making those sounds, i love hearing you moan f’ me.”
by the time he finally moves back up, you’re a mess.
you're calling his name, your fingers digging into his shoulders as he sinks into you.
it’s not fast or rough, not like the usual. this time it’s slow, and incrediblyy intimate.
he keeps his eyes locked on yours, murmuring about how good you feel, how much he missed the way you fit together.
fucking asshole.
you knew this was his way of saying “sorry”, of trying to avoid the questions you’d bombard him with.
and for a moment, everything is perfect.
but then, the moment he releases in you, the feeling passes.
the room goes quiet except for your heavy breathing as you both collapse onto the tangled sheets.
you’re waiting for him to pull you into his chest, to kiss your forehead and stay in this bubble for just a little longer.
instead, you feel the bed shift.
jungkook reaches over to the nightstand and grabs his phone. the bright screen lights up his face, casting a glow over his features. he’s scrolling, his thumb moving fast, and a small, amused smirk plays on his lips.
the silence in the room suddenly feels heavy again.
you hated this part.
you hated that he’d talk like how he did just to get into your pants, and then he’d completely act as if you didn’t exist right after.
it had you overthinking most of the time, which led to arguments, and arguments led to a prolonged lack of communication. which would then be fixed by him knocking at your door again, and fucking you, again.
and the cycle repeats.
you try to talk, hoping that something would change this time.
"that felt ... felt really good, kook," you say softly, trying to catch his eye. "missed you.."
"mhm," he hums, not looking up. his eyes are glued to his screen. “me too.”
"maybe we could, i don't know, cuddle and watch a movie?" you suggest, reaching out to trace the tattoos on his arm. "or we could just stay like this for a bit."
"yeah, down for that," he says, but his tone is totally flat. he’s still typing something out, his focus a million miles away from the bed you’re currently sharing.
you watch him, the ache in your chest returning.
he’s right here, his skin still warm against yours, but he’s already gone.
he’s back to being this version of himself, the one who treats you like an option once his needs are met.
you ponder what you are to him. and it doesn’t help with the already lingering questions and thoughts in your head.
you shift closer, resting your head on his shoulder, trying to force the intimacy back into the room.
he doesn't pull away, but he doesn't drop the phone either. he just shifts his arm slightly so he can keep scrolling.
"who are you talking to?" you ask, trying to sound casual, even though your heart is sinking.
"just the guys," he mutters, finally locking the phone and tossing it face down.
he sighs, a long, tired sound, and finally rolls over to face you. he looks at you for a second, his expression unreadable.
"c’mere."
he pulls you into his arms, tucking your head under his chin. it’s exactly what you asked for, but it feels different now.
"we're good, right?" he asks, his voice muffled by your hair.
you want to say no. you want to bring up the girls, the ignorant fucking texts, and the fact that he was supposed to be over a few days ago, but bailed and has yet to give you an explanation.
but you’re tired, and his arms are warm, and the scent of him is already drugging your brain again.
"yeah," you lie, closing your eyes. "we're good."
the next morning, you expected him to be gone.
you expected to wake up with a note on your bedroom table, but you see him awake, and staring at the ceiling
you can’t help but smile, thinking that maybe things were changing.
but oh were you fucking wrong.
"hey, morning.” you mumble.
“didn’t think you’d still be here.” you whisper, and his head turns towards your direction.
“just don’t have anywhere to be today.” he replies.
you simply nod, trying to not think much of it.
“m’ gonna shower," you mumble, your voice thick with sleep.
"i'll join you," he says. he doesn't look at you, but he stands up and follows you into the bathroom.
you feel a tiny spark of relief in your chest, a little smile tugs at your lips. maybe last night actually meant something. maybe he's actually staying present this time.
right?
the shower is steaming up fast. you step under the water, waiting for him to pull you close, to continue that sweetness from a few hours ago.
but he just stands there.
the silence is deafening, punctuated only by the aggressive spray of the water against the tiles.
he’s washing himself without even looking at you, his eyes occasionally looking up at the bottle of soap.
he looks like he’s a million miles away, like he’s already mentally left the apartment.
fuck, you hated this.
"kook?" you say.
"you okay? you’re like... unusually quiet."
"i'm fine," he mutters, not looking up. "could you pass me the soap."
you hand it to him, your fingers brushing his, but he doesn't grab your hand or even acknowledge the touch. he’s dry and he’s cold.
the warmth from last night has been completely drained out of him.
you try one more time, reaching out to touch his shoulder. "did you sleep okay? i was thinking maybe we could go grab some—“
he sighs, cutting you off.
he fucking sighs.
"don't really feel like talking right now," he snaps, rinsing the soap off his chest. "just wanna get clean."
he finishes before you, stepping out of the glass stall without a second glance.
you stay there for a few more minutes, the hot water turning cold, feeling that familiar knot of frustration twisting in your gut.
your mind is racing with thoughts, you quickly do what you need to do, and within minutes you’re out.
and you don't even bother with a towel.
you throw on a tiny tank top and your underwear, your hair dripping wet and sticking to your back, and you march out into the living room.
he’s sitting on the edge of the couch, scrolling through his phone, fully dressed in his jeans and hoodie like he’s already halfway out the door.
"jungkook. did i do something?" you start, your voice dripping with sarcasm.
"was it something i said? or did i suddenly become invisible the second you fucked me last night?"
jungkook doesn't even look up from the screen. "no. what are you even talking about?"
"then why the fuck are you acting like this?" you raise your voice, stepping into his line of sight.
"last night you were literally begging to come over. you were so sweet, so gentle, acting like you actually gave a shit about me. and now? you’re acting like i’m some stranger you just happened to wake up next to!"
he finally looks up, and his expression is so blank it makes you want to scream. "i don't know why you’re yelling so early in the morning. i’m literally just sitting here."
"no!— you’re not 'just sitting here,' jungkook! you do this every single time!" you’re pacing now, your wet hair spraying droplets on the floor.
“whenever you mess up, you turn into this perfect version of yourself. the perfect version for me. you use the sweetness to get back in my fucking bed, and the second you get what you want, you shut down, you shut me out! you treat me like a fucking convenience."
he scoffs.
"you’re reaching," he says, his ego flaring up as he stands to face you. he looks down at you, towering over you with a nonchalant shrug that drives you fucking insane.
"i came over because i wanted to see you. i made it up to you. what more do you want?"
"i want you to actually be here! and i want to know what we actually are for fucks sake." you shout, poking a finger into his chest.
"i want to know who the real you is. is it the guy who calls me baby and kisses my forehead, or is it this cold, selfish jerk who can't even look at me over breakfast?"
jungkook scoffs, shaking his head like you’re the one being crazy. "what do you mean?" he asks, his voice sounding genuinely confused, which only makes it worse.
holy shit you’re about to break.
"i'm right here. i'm staying, aren't i? you’re the one creating a problem out of fucking nothing."
"nothing? you think this is nothing?" you’re practically vibrating with rage, the tears starting to prick at your eyes but you refuse to let them fall.
“you lie to me all the time, you bail on me for like— the 60th time, and then you come here and act like you own me. you use me to feel better about yourself and then you check out. i’m so fucking tired of guessing what you want from me."
"you know what, I’m not doing this with you," he says, his jaw tightening.
he’s already reaching for his wallet and keys on the coffee table.
"you’re being way too much right now. you’re always searching for some deep meaning behind everything. this isn’t fucking third grade literature y/n! sometimes a shower is just a shower."
you cannot believe those words just flew out of his mouth.
"fuck you! leave then!" you scream, your voice cracking.
"because i'm done trying to translate your bullshit signals. you’re a coward, jungkook. you can’t even handle one real conversation without running away."
he stares at you for a long beat, his eyes cold and hard. he looks at your messy hair, your shaking hands, and he just sighs like you’re an inconvenience.
wow.
"fine. have it your fucking way," he says, shoving his phone into his pocket. "you’re confusing as shit, you know that? one second you’re pulling me closer and the next you’re screaming at me. i can't keep up with this. i'll see myself out."
he doesn't even look back. he grabs his jacket, throws it over his shoulder, and walks out.
the door slams.
the sound of the door hitting the frame echoes through the empty apartment, final and sharp.
the silence that follows is deafening. you stand there in the middle of the room, the dampness of your hair making you shiver. the adrenaline drains out of you all at once, leaving you empty and hollow.
you collapse onto the couch, the same spot where he was just sitting, and finally, the first sob breaks through.
you hate him.
you hate how he makes you feel like the crazy one just for wanting the truth.
you hate that even now, with your heart breaking, you're already wondering how long it'll take before he sends the next "can I come over? let me make it up to you." text.
and the worst part is you already know what your fucking answer will be.
the silence in the apartment is literal torture.
it’s been seven days. seven days of you staring at your phone, checking his "last seen," and then getting mad at yourself for even caring
your room is a fucking mess. clothes on the floor, empty take out containers on the desk, and the curtains are drawn shut like the time you mourned the death of that one dinosaur that was left behind in jurassic park for a week.
you’re laying facedown on your bed, scrolling through your old photos, when you hear aggressive banging on your apartment door.
"y/n! open the door! i have a safety pin and a clip and i'm not afraid to use them!" yunjin yells through the wood.
you groan, dragging yourself up. you look in the hallway mirror and wince.
your skin is pale, your hair is practically a bird's nest, and you’ve got dark circles under your eyes.
you open the door just as she’s about to kick it.
"finally," she snaps, pushing past you. she stops in the middle of the living room and gag.
"oh my god. girl. it smells like literal sadness in here. when was the last time you opened a window?….. or showered?"
"i don't know. leave me alone, yunjin," you mumble, walking back to the couch and burying your face in a pillow.
she doesn't leave. she starts opening the curtains, letting in the blinding sun.
you hiss, clearly irritated.
but she does not give one fuck. she sits on the edge of the couch and pulls the pillow away from your face.
"okay, talk to me. seriously. what’s up with you? it’s been a week. you’ve been ghosting the group chat and you didn't even post for jimin’s birthday. is it him?"
you feel the lump in your throat getting bigger.
“so it is him, isn’t it?”
"he just... he left, yunjin. like, for real this time. we had this huge fight after he stayed over. he was being so sweet that night, like actually gentle, trying to make up for the shit we fought about a few nights ago.” your voice trails.
“and then the next morning it’s like he flipped a switch. he was cold and dry and when i called him out on it, he just walked out. he slammed the door so hard i thought the frame broke."
yunjin’s expression softens. she reaches out and rubs your arm. "did he say anything after? a text? a call?"
"no. nothing," you whisper, and your voice cracks.
"and that’s what hurts the most. i thought after everything... after the way he was looking at me that night... i thought he’d care enough to at least check if i was okay. but he just went back to his life. he’s probably out right now acting like i don't even fucking exist."
“it hurts, yun. it really…. fucking hurts.” your voice softens, tears threatening to fall as you can feel your heart physically being stabbed.
"oh, my poor baby… you know what he is? he’s a coward," yunjin says firmly.
"he uses that nonchalant act because he’s scared of actually being real with you. he’s acting like he doesn’t care because he’s too scared to have any real feelings."
"i just feel so stupid," you say, a tear finally escaping.
"i just… i ponder what i even am to him, yun.”
“like, am i just someone he calls when he’s bored of his friends? am i just a backup? i hate that i let him back in every single time. i hate that i'm sitting here crying and he's probably totally fine."
yunjin pulls you into a hug, letting you just leak into her shoulder for a minute. she lets you cry it out, not saying anything until you’ve gone quiet.
"oh baby. you’re not stupid," she says, pulling back to look you in the eyes.
"you’re just human. and you deserve to feel the way you do right now….. but you’re also a bad fucking bitch, and you’ve forgotten that because you’ve been rotting in this apartment for a week.” she says firmly.
“you’re not gonna sit here and cry over a guy who can’t even send a text. you're way too hot for this."
she stands up suddenly, clapping her hands. "get up. go to the bathroom. exfoliate. shave. and for gods sake, take a fucking shower. I love you, but you reek.”
"why?" you ask, wiping your eyes, looking up at her.
"because we’re going to the club tonight. jimin and taehyung are already texting me. hara is coming too. we’re gonna go out, get some drinks, and remind you that the world doesn't start and end with jeon mother fuckin’ jungkook."
"yunjin, no," you groan, falling back onto the cushions.
"i look like a literal zombie. my hair is a mess, i have nothing to wear, and i just want to sleep for another ten years.
"fuck no. you’re not sleeping," she says, heading for your closet and tossing clothes around.
“i’ll pick the fit and do your makeup. we are going to get you a vodka soda and you’re going to dance until you forget his name. blackout, if you must. anything to have your mind away from him and his circumcised dick.“
you look at her, seeing that look in her eyes that means she’s serious. you look around your depressing apartment, then back at your reflection in the glass of the tv.
"fine," you mutter. "but if i cry in the middle of the dance floor, it’s your fault."
"I can work with that, we have a deal." she chirps, pointing toward the shower.
"hit the shower. now."
by the time yunjin is done with you, you actually look… not disgusting. she put you in this tiny, tight black dress and did your makeup so good you barely recognize yourself.
the club is completely packed when you guys get there. the bass is thumping so hard you can feel it in your chest, and the air smells like perfume, sweat, and expensive drinks.
you follow yunjin through the crowd, trying not to trip over everyone, until you see the booth in the corner.
jimin, taehyung, and hara are already there, sitting around a table full of drinks.
"holy shit! look who’s alive!" jimin yells over the music, jumping up to pull you into a massive hug.
"i thought you actually died, you’ve been so quiet on everywhere."
"yeah, well. blame yunjin, she dragged me out," you laugh, sitting down next to him. taehyung hands you a shot of tequila immediately, and you down it, feeling the burn hit your throat.
the club gets a bit drowned out after a couple more drinks.
you lean closer to jimin, since you guys have always been close but haven't really caught up in forever. you start telling him a little bit about what happened last week.
"he’s just so exhausting, chim," you shout over the loud music, holding your drink tight.
"one second he’s literally begging to see me, being all sweet, and the next he acts like i’m a stranger. i don't even know what we are. and he always avoids that exact question or tries to push me away when i bring that topic up."
jimin nods, looking all sympathetic. "he’s always been like that, babe. he doesn't know how to show emotion. he thinks that the only way he’ll get through life is by being this— closed off version of himself. we’ve tried telling him it never ends well. but does the fucker listen? nope."
“you’re doing the best you can, y/n. don’t beat yourself up about this too much, okay?” he finishes, rubbing your shoulder slightly.
“now, what shall offer m’lady? perhaps a highball? or maybe a—“ suddenly, jimin stops talking. his face goes completely blank, and his eyes shift toward the entrance.
"holy fucking shit," jimin mutters, his grip tightening on his glass. "look who just walked in."
you turn around, and your heart literally drops straight into your stomach.
jungkook.
well, shit.
he’s walking in with two of his guy friends. he’s wearing an all black fit, his hair is messy, and he looks entirely too good.
he looks completely fine, like he hasn't lost a single second of sleep over you.
"fuck. holy fucking shit. i— i shouldn't have come here," you whisper-yell, instantly panicking. you grab your clutch, ready to bolt. "yunjin, we have to go— if not, i’m leaving right now."
"are you phsycotic?! stay down! don't be so dramatic!" yunjin hisses, grabbing your arm and pulling you back into the seat.
"are you seriously going to let this jerk ruin your night? what did we talk about on the way over here? live your fucking life y/n. it’s about time you have some self respect! besides, you look way too hot to run away like some coward. just ignore him."
"ignore him? yunjin, he’s right there!" you’re literally hiding behind jimin’s shoulder, trying to peek through his arm like an absolute psycho.
it’s kind of funny how bad you're freaking out, and taehyung is just sitting there laughing at you.
jungkook doesn't notice you guys yet. he moves over to a table across the VIP section. and within minutes, a couple of girls in low cut tops slide right into his booth.
you feel that annoying pang of jealousy in your chest, but you somehow force yourself to keep watching.
the girls are doing the most, leaning in close and trying to talk to him. but jungkook just looks... bored. or just, out of it. you guess.
he’s in his own little bubble, sipping his drink and staring at the floor. he nods when they speak, but he isn't really laughing or entertaining them like that.
his friends are trying to hype him up, forcing him to take shots and enjoy the vibe, but he just looks totally closed off.
"see? babe, he looks miserable," yunjin whispers in your ear, nudging you. "he’s literally ignoring them."
"whatever, that means nothing." you mutter, but you can’t look away. it’s actually kind of funny watching these girls try so hard while he just sits there looking so nonchalant and annoyed.
after another hour of watching him from a distance, the tequila finally kicks in. you stand up, telling yunjin you need another drink.
"i'm going to the bar, need another drink.” you say, as she simply nods.
you walk toward the bar, making sure your hips swing just a little bit more. you can feel eyes on you. you don't look at his table, but you know he’s watching. you can literally feel the back of your neck tingling.
you reach the bar and order a vodka soda.
you’re waiting for the bartender when you hear a familiar voice right next to you.
you turn your head slightly, looking at the big mirror behind the bar.
and there he is.
jungkook is standing three feet away from you, ordering a drink for his friend. he looks over, catches your eye in the reflection, and his expression cracks for a split second.
he looks surprised, then his eyes darken as he takes in your dress.
you don't say a word. you just grab your vodka soda from the bartender, take a sip, and turn around to walk straight back to your booth.
you walk right past him. your shoulder brushes against his chest. it feels like a literal electric shock. you keep your face completely blank and don't stop.
but just as you step away, you hear his voice.
it’s low and rough. you haven’t heard it in awhile.
“nice dress.” he whispers.
fuck. fuck fuck fuck!
you hide your expression well, you don't even give him the satisfaction of looking back. you just keep walking, but inside, your brain is melting.
you get back to the booth and yunjin is basically vibrating in her seat. "oh my god we were watching! he saw you! what did he say? did he say anything?"
"he said he liked the dress," you mutter, trying to act cool but your face is definitely red.
"and? what did you do?" jimin asks, leaning in.
"nothing. i just ignored him and walked away."
jimin laughs, raising his glass. "nice one!”
you glance back over to his table one last time. jungkook is back at his booth, but he’s not even pretending to listen to his friends anymore.
he’s just sitting there, his chin resting on his hand, staring directly at your table with his dark eyes.
he looks completely wrecked that you just brushed him off, and for the first time in a week, you finally feel a little alive.
you finally feel the way he’s been feeling all the times when he’d act like this to you. and you’re fucking loving it.
you get back to the table and try your best to just keep yourself busy by engaging back into the conversation, laughing at whatever stupid jokes your friends are making.
you’re trying so hard to be unbothered. you want him to see that you’re perfectly fine, that your life didn't stop just because he decided to go ghost for a week.
but for the next hour, it’s just a straight up fucking mind game with him.
every couple of minutes, your eyes just automatically drift back to his table.
and every single time, he’s already staring. you quickly snap your head away, pretending like you were just looking at the lights or the crowd, and a few minutes later, you catch him doing the exact same thing.
he looks away the second your eyes lock. it’s exhausting. and your chest feel like it’s being squeezed.
( whip out spotify or apple music right the fuck now and put on “every breath you take” by the police!! — and I’d recc you to read it & follow the lyrics but do whatevaa!! x )
you take another drink just to make the knot in your throat go away.
and then, the bass dies down.
the loud club music fades out, and this familiar, soft intro starts playing through the speakers.
“every breath you take... every move you make..”
your entire body just freezes. your cup stops halfway to your mouth and you genuinely feel yourself stop breathing.
oh? oh.
“every bond you break, every step you take. I’ll be watching you.”
the dj comes on the mic, his voice sounding way too cheerful. "alright guys! let’s slow it down a little bit. grab your partner, or someone special to you and bring them out to the dance floor."
you feel like you’ve been hit by a truck. a big fucking truck. of all the songs in the world, it had to be this one.
“every single day, and every word you say.”
this was your guy's song. it wasn't even a romantic thing at first— you just remember the exact night you both watched season 2 of the stranger things finale.
you both fell in love with the series and that exact scene of the ball, and from then on, it was just your thing.
“every game you play, every night you stay.”
whenever it came on randomly on shuffle, in a car, or in a store in public. jungkook would grab your waist and spin you around, both of you laughing without a care in the world. it was the only time things felt simple with him.
the only time things didn’t feel complicated, or rushed. time always stopped the moment the two of you moved your bodies against each other to that song. you felt almost… loved?
so yeah, horrible fucking timing.
slowly, you look back over at his booth.
“I’ll be watching you.”
only he isn't looking away this time. he’s staring straight at you, completely ignoring the noise and the people starting to stand up around him.
and his face isn't cocky. there's no smirk, no anger, nothing. his eyes look so heavy, almost... emotional. it’s a face you’ve literally never seen him make before.
you see his jaw tighten, not like he’s pissed off, but like he’s trying to hold something back. his eyebrows descend downwards, looking almost sad. completely wrecked.
your mind goes totally foggy. the crowd is moving, couples are walking past your booth to go to the dance floor, but it feels like the room is in slow motion. you’re just staring at him, trying to figure him out while trying to keep yourself from bawling right there and then.
“oh can’t you see?”
and then, of course, the worst thing possible happens.
one of the girls from earlier reaches down, grabs jungkook’s arm, and pulls him up.
you see his face look startled for a split second, like he was snapped out of a trance.
your mouth drops open a little bit, your stomach twisting into a sickening knot. because instead of shaking her off, instead of sitting back down, jungkook actually follows her.
“you belong to me.”
he lets her lead him right onto the dance floor. but he’s looking at you.
the second you see them start to move together to your song, you completely lose it. you couldn't believe what you were watching.
it felt like a literal slap to the face. the tears just start spilling over, hot and fast, blurring your vision.
“how my poor heart aches.”
you can see him looking over the girl’s shoulder, his dark eyes locked onto you the entire time he’s moving with her, but that just makes it a million times worse. it feels malicious.
“with every step you take, every move you make. and every vow you break.”
it feels like he’s doing it just to hurt you, just to prove he can.
"babe? hey, what’s wrong?" yunjin’s voice cuts through, her hand coming onto your shoulder.
jimin leans in, his face looking all worried. "hey, why are you crying? did he do something?"
you can’t hear shit. their voices sound like they’re underwater, completely drowned out by the lyrics of the song playing in the background.
your black mascara is already running down your cheeks, burning your eyes. you can't sit there for another second watching them.
you just grab your purse off the table, knock your chair back a bit, and rush out of venue.
you’re practically pushing past people, your head down, stumbling in your heels as you run toward the exit.
the music is still echoing in your ears, following you out of the main room, somehow getting louder the further away you go from the club.
you burst through the heavy doors and run into the bathroom located right outside the club entrance.
thankfully, it’s empty. the faint sound of the song is still vibrating through the walls.
you let yourself sink straight down against the back of the bathroom door, your knees pulling up to your chest. you’re sobbing so hard your chest hurts, horribly, the sound of your crying echoing against the walls.
your hand fists into your messy hair, pulling at the roots because you just want the pain in your chest to stop.
"you're such a fucking asshole!," you choke out, your voice breaking into tiny, pathetic sobs. "i h-hate you. i f-fucking hate you."
without even thinking, you unlock your phone with a shaking thumb. your eyes are so blurry from tears you can barely see the screen. you open your contacts and scroll down until you hit his name.
you click on his contact. right at the top is the profile picture you set for him.
a photo booth picture of the two of you from months ago. you’re biting his cheek and he’s laughing, everything looks so happy, and perfect.
your heart completely breaks into pieces looking at it. it feels like that boy doesn't even exist anymore.
with a shaky breath, you scroll all the way to the bottom of his contact page. you don't hesitate this time. you press the red text that says block this caller.
the pop up asks if you're sure. you press block contact.
you slide the phone face down onto the dirty bathroom floor, burying your face in your knees as a fresh wave of sobs hits you. you blocked him. it’s done.
but as you sit there in the quiet stall, listening to the muffled music outside, you just feel completely empty, and as the song fades out, so do you.
you wake up and your head is literally pounding so fucking bad it feels like it’s about to explode.
everything is a total blur.
you try to squint your eyes open against the light, and the first thing you see is yunjin and jimin’s faces right above you, looking down like they’re inspecting a corpse.
they’re whispering, but because your head hurts so bad, it just sounds like something’s stuck in your fucking head.
"i told you she's waking up, stop poking her arm," jimin mutters, swatting yunjin’s hand away.
"i'm not poking her, i'm checking if she's alive! she's been out for like 14 fucking hours," yunjin whispers back, sounding all annoyed.
"well, don't yell! you're gonna give her a headache."
"i’m literally whispering!”
you let out a weak groan, and they both instantly snap their heads down, their expressions softening the second they see your eyes are fully open.
"hey, hey," jimin says, his voice getting super soft as he reaches out to pat your shoulder.
"how are you feeling? you okay?"
"water," you croak out, your throat feeling like actual sandpaper.
yunjin immediately runs to the kitchen and comes back with a glass, lifting your head up slightly so you can sip it.
"what happened?" you mutter, rubbing your eyes. you look around and realize you're back on your own couch, wrapped in a fluffy blanket.
"how did i get here? the last thing i remember is... the bathroom."
yunjin scoffs, sitting on the edge of the couch.
"girl, we called your phone like a thousand times. we were literally panicking thinking you got kidnapped or something. then i remembered we have our locations shared on find my iphone, so i tracked you. it led us straight to the bathroom outside the club."
"we found you literally blacked out on the floor,"
jimin adds, shaking his head. "yunjin was about to call a whole fucking ambulance, but then we realized you were just completely out and asleep from the tequila and the crying. so i just carried you out through the back exit and we brought you home, and stayed the night so you wouldn’t wake up to nobody.”
you try to process everything they're saying, but their voices start to drown out as little snippets of last night start flashing in your head. the music. the song.
your, song.
jungkook looking at you. and then... that girl grabbing his arm and pulling him onto the dance floor to your song.
the memory hits you like a physical punch to the stomach.
"hey," yunjin says, noticing your face change.
"what actually happened last night? why did you run off like that? you can talk to us, babe. you know that right?”
you look at the two of them, and that fuckass of a lump in your throat comes back, twice as big this time.
"it was t-the song," you start, your voice trembling. "that slow song the dj played. it was our song. we used to dance to it all the time.”
you feel the hot tears start spilling over your cheeks again, your chest tightening. "and he was staring at me, yunjin. he looked so sad, like he actually felt something for once. but then this girl... this girl just grabbed his arm and pulled him to the dance floor. and he went. he actually went and danced with her while looking straight at me."
by each word, you get visibly more upset and hurt, the pain from the past week just bubbling over until you can’t hold it back anymore. you start bawling, completely sobbing as you just spew and rant everything you’ve been bottling up.
"fuck! i hate him so much!" you scream, cry, fisting the blanket in your hands.
"how does he— how can he, treat me like I’m fucking nothing. he ignores me for a week, acts like i don't exist, and then the second i try to have a little bit of fun, he has to ruin it. he has to show me that he can just replace me in front of my face. i blocked him. i blocked his number on the bathroom floor because i just can't do this anymore. i’m so tired of feeling like i’m losing my mind over someone who doesn't even care about me.”
“but why, why can’t I make this feeling go away. why… do I still yearn for someone who doesn’t yearn for me?” you question yourself, teary eyes looking up at your friends.
jimin and yunjin just move closer, wrapping their arms around you while you just lose it. they let you scream and cry for a long time, just listening to you let it all out.
"I’m so sorry my love. he’s jjust a piece of shit, babe," yunjin reassures you, wiping a tear from your cheek.
"you did the right thing by blocking his entitled ass. he doesn't deserve to have access to you if he’s gonna play with your feelings like that. you need space to actually breathe without him constantly messing with your head."
"exactly," jimin says softly.
"you gotta stop letting him dictate your mood. he only pulls those stunts because he knows you're watching. the best thing you can do now is just stay strong and not.. unblock him. let him see and feel what it’s like to actually lose you."
after like an hour of just sitting on the couch and talking it out, you’ve finally stopped crying, though your eyes are still completely puffy and your face feels raw.
suddenly, three sharp knocks appear on your front door.
"is that taehyung?" yunjin asks, looking at jimin.
"probably," jimin nods. "he knew we were coming here after the club and he said he might drop by if he got off from work early."
"i'll get it," yunjin says, standing up and walking over to the door.
she unlocks it and swings it open, ready to greet taehyung. but the second she sees who’s standing there, the smile completely vanishes from her face.
it’s not taehyung. it’s jungkook.
the moment yunjin realizes, she slams her weight into the door to close it, but jungkook is faster. he shoves his hand into the gap and forcefully pushes it open, stepping right into your apartment.
he looks a complete mess. his hair is all wild and unbrushed, and his eyes are heavy and droopy, like he hasn't slept all night. he’s just wearing a baggy black hoodie and gray sweatpants.
the second his eyes scan the room and land on you— wrapped in that blanket, with your eyes all red and puffy.
you can see his expression shift. it’s like his heart literally squeezes just looking at you.
your eyes widen, and you feel completely paralyzed. you can’t move a single muscle. you genuinely do not want to see him right now, not after last night.
"get the fuck out, jungkook," yunjin yells, putting both her hands on his chest and trying to push him backward out the door, but it’s completely useless.
he’s way too strong. he doesn't even budge. he’s just standing there, staring directly at you, and you’re staring right back at him, the room going dead silent.
jimin suddenly gets up from the couch and steps right in front of you, blocking jungkook’s view.
that’s when jungkook finally snaps out of his trance, his face twisting into a slightly annoyed expression as he looks at jimin.
"why the fuck are you here?" jimin asks, his voice low as he steps closer to jungkook. "get the fuck out of her apartment. she clearly doesn't want to see you."
jungkook scoffs, his ego flaring up despite how tired he looks. "i didn't come here to talk to you, jimin. move out of my fuckin’ way."
"i’m not moving shit," jimin says, matching his tone, his jaw tight. "you think you can just show up here after the shit you pulled last night? you wrecked her, and we had to be there for her because your ass couldn’t man up and comfort her for shit. so, walk away before i make you."
jungkook scoffs.
"you won't do shit," jungkook talks back, stepping closer until they’re practically chest to chest. "this is between me and her. you guys need to leave."
"she blocked your number for a reason. you’re a fuckin’ asshole and you need to take the fucking hint." jimin shouts, getting right in his face.
"you’re nothing but a selfish loser who uses her when you’re bored. you don't care about anyone but yourself."
that completely snaps jungkook’s patience. before anyone can even react, jungkook’s arm flies out and he punches jimin straight across the jaw.
"jimin!" yunjin screams.
jimin stumbles back a step, but he doesn't back down. his face goes completely dark.
he gets right back up and launches himself at jungkook, punching him square in the face, sending him stumbling back against your dining table.
the sudden violence completely breaks you out of your shock. what the fuck was happening?
you rush off the couch, dropping the blanket, and run toward them.
"can you two fucking stop!— stop it right now!" you’re yelling, completely upset as you and yunjin try to break them apart.
yunjin grabs jimin around his waist, pulling him back with all her strength, while you jump right between them, throwing your hands onto jungkook’s chest and shoving him backward toward the door.
"jungkook! stop— fuck! let go please!— fucking let go of him!" you scream.
when you finally manage to pull them apart, you keep your hands pressed against his chest, pushing him away.
you’re looking at him, so close to him for the first time after this entire horrible week. your breathing is heavy, and you find yourself whispering, "stop... please just stop."
jungkook finally looks down at you. he doesn't even acknowledge the fact that he just got into a literal fistfight, or that there's blood starting to smear across his face. his dark eyes are just searching yours, looking completely desperate.
"i need to talk to you," he whispers, his voice rough and low.
"are you fucking crazy?" you whisper-yell, your eyes burning with fresh tears. "you come to my house, force your way in, and fucking fight my best friend after everything that happened this week? after what you did last night?"
"i don't care," he says, his voice cracking slightly. "i don't care about any of that. i just need to talk to you. please."
just as he says that, a dark drop of blood drips from the corner of his swollen lip, sliding down his chin.
your heart completely winces. no matter how much you hate him, no matter how much he hurt you, seeing him bleed makes your stomach turn. you feel this horrible wave of guilt, like this is somehow all your fault.
without even thinking, your hand automatically moves up, your thumb gently wiping the blood away from his lip.
the second your skin touches his, jungkook’s hand flies up and grips your wrist abruptly. his grip is tight, firm, but his fingers are trembling against your skin. he holds your hand right there against his face, awaiting your answer.
"please," he whispers again, his voice literally breaking this time.
your eyes burn into his, and you slowly gulp, your mind completely spinning. you look at his messy hair, his droopy eyes, and the desperation practically oozing off of him.
slowly, you pull your wrist out of his grip. you turn around and walk over to jimin, who is leaning against the kitchen counter while yunjin checks his jaw.
"are you okay?" you ask softly, throwing your arms around jimin’s neck and hugging him tightly. "i'm so sorry, jimin. i'm so sorry— this is all my fault."
"hey, stop, it's fine," jimin mutters, hugging you back just as tight and patting your back. "it's not your fault. the guy’s a fuckin’ psycho.”
he pulls back and looks at you, then glances over your shoulder at jungkook, who is just standing by the door watching you hug him with a totally miserable expression.
jimin sighs, smoothing down your messy hair.
"look, me and yunjin are just gonna go for a drive around the neighborhood. we’ll give you guys some space to talk this out."
he raises his voice, speaking way louder so jungkook can hear every single word. "call us if anything happens. immediately. i don't care what time it is, you call and we’ll be back here in two minutes, alright?”
yunjin steps up and gives you a tight squeeze, whispering in your ear, "don't let him bullshit his way out of this, okay? stay strong."
you nod weakly.
they walk toward the door, and as jimin heads out, he purposefully slams his shoulder into jungkook’s, a hard, petty bump.
but jungkook doesn't even flinch. he doesn't even care at this point. his eyes are completely glued to you, waiting for the door to click shut so he can finally have you alone.
the door clicks shut, and the sudden quiet in the apartment is almost too heavy to breathe in.
you just stand there for a second, your hands shaking as you cross your arms over your chest.
a few fresh tears slip out of your eyes, hot and quiet, running down your puffy cheeks.
you take a deep breath, trying to steady your voice, and turn around to face him.
"talk." you say, simply.
jungkook takes a step closer to you, his eyes drooping and looking completely broken. he looks down at you, his hands twitching like he wants to reach out but he’s too scared to touch you.
"i'm so, so fucking sorry," he starts, his voice rough and cracking. "i don't even know what came over me last night. i don't know why the fuck i chose to follow that girl and dance with her. but i swear to god, i was only thinking about you. the whole time, i was just looking at you. i didn't even realize what i was doing until you stormed out of there, and then it hit me. i immediately pushed her away and ran out to chase after you, but you were just gone. i didn't know where you went, i couldn't find you anywhere."
he rubs a hand over his face, leaving a smear of jimin’s blood on his skin, but he doesn't even care.
not right now.
"i know we're not— exclusive. and we’ve never talked about it," he murmurs, his eyes burning into yours.
“but i know there's something here between us. i feel it, every single time. every time you hold me, touch me. but i'm scared. i'm so fucking scared because i've never felt like this before."
you just stare at him, the tears running down your face heavily.
"when i was young, in my first ever relationship... that girl broke me," he says, his voice dropping to a whisper.
"i loved her so much, and she hurt me so fuckin’ badly. and even though it's been like fifteen years since that happened, and i'm completely moved on from her, a part of me still feels like the only way i can live my life without feeling that type of pain again is by just... not letting myself feel anything. especially love. i thought if i didn't care, i couldn't get hurt."
your heart aches hearing him say it, and you do sympathize with him, you really do. but the anger and the pain from the past few months is still too raw. too… painful.
"that still doesn't give you a reason to act the way you did," you say, your voice trembling as you look up at him.
"just because some girl broke your heart when you were younger, that doesn't mean you get to do the exact same thing to me. because whatever you felt back then? that’s exactly how i’m feeling right now. that’s how i’ve been feeling for months, kook. and i’m s-so tired. my chest physically hurts whenever i look at you. my heart literally squeezes whenever we have fucking sex, and then you just act like it means absolutely nothing the second it’s over."
"no— I, baby. y-you don't get it," he cuts you off, shaking his head and stepping even closer until he’s right in your space.
"i feel so amazing when i'm with you. I feel so good. but the only reason why i act like that afterwards is because i just feel like you wouldn't want me close to you. feel like if i do get too close, you’ll find me too fucking clingy or annoying or whatever, and you’ll just push me away. and i can't s-stand the thought of you pushing me away. i c-can’t stand being away from you."
you let out a bitter laugh. "you can't stand being away from me? then what about the entire week that you fucking ghosted me after we fought?"
"i didn't know what to do!" jungkook yells softly, his voice full of frustration and desperation.
"i felt so fucking s-shit, b-baby. felt like a fucking jerk because i knew it was entirely my fault, but i just... i couldn't face you after that. i know we fight a lot, there’s been so many times where we’ve messed up. b-but i couldn't face you after this specific fight. i don't even know why, but i think it’s because everything just came rushing to my head at once. whatever i was doing, how bad i was treating you... it just all hit me and i felt like i couldn't face you."
"i don't even know what to believe anymore," you sob, shaking your head as you look away from him. "every single time i ask you what we are, or even try to bring up the topic, you just push me away."
"i know, i know. fuck— I know baby. and I’m so sorry.” he rambles, his hands finally coming up to grab yours. his palms are warm and shaking.
"but it was never fully intentional, i always just had second thoughts about everything, i was just overthinking, but i knew that i wanted you. only you. because i love you and i just—"
he stops mid sentence. his breath hitches, and he just stares at you, his eyes slightly wide.
you freeze, your heart stopping in your chest.
"wait... what did you just say?"
( turn spotify the fuck on and play ‘iris’ by the goo goo dolls right now!! )
jungkook shuts his mouth, looking at you for a few seconds.
and then, a tiny, genuine smile touches the corner of his bleeding lip.
"i love you, y/n.” he says, his voice steady and soft this time. "i really fucking do."
he pulls your hands up to his chest, bringing himself so close you can feel the heat radiating off his body.
"and i'm so sorry i didn't get to tell you sooner. i'm so sorry it took me this long to realize it. but i swear, i promise you i will be better for you. i’ll change for you. i’m never gonna make you feel this way ever again, and i will never let another tear come out of your eyes because of me."
that completely breaks you. you’re fucking bawling now, as you lift your weak hands and start lightly hitting his chest.
"you're so f-fucking stupid," you sob, your forehead pressing against his hoodie. "you're so fucking stupid.”
you sigh, looking up at him. “i love you too."
"f-fuck. say that again," he whispers, his hand coming up to gently lift your chin so you have to look at him.
his eyes are bigger now, burning into yours.
and for the first time, in forever of knowing him, his eyes are not full of lust, but full of love.
and then he smashes his lips onto yours.
it’s not like before. it’s not fast or desperate. it’s deep, passionate, and so full of emotion it makes your whole body ache.
you’ve never kissed like this before, ever. your hands grip his neck, pulling him closer as his tongue slides slick against yours, tasting the faint copper of his blood.
his hands roam your body, pulling you flush against his chest as he moves his mouth down to your jaw, whispering against your skin. "you're s-so beautiful... so fucking beautiful. i'm so sorry, baby. for everything. gonna show you how much i love you."
he handles you like you’re the only thing that matters in the world, guiding you back toward the bedroom.
when he lays you down on the tangled sheets,he hovers over you, his eyes never leaving yours as he pulls off your clothes slowly.
your clothes are discarded on the floor, leaving nothing between you but the heat of your skin.
his mouth lands on your left nipple, enveloping your bud into his mouth as he sucks on it lightly.
swirling his tongue around your bead as his eyes never leaves yours.
“t-taste so fucking good, so fuckin’ full for me.” he whispers, mouth attaching itself to your other nipple, giving it an equal amount of attention.
“k-kookie! mm— fuck!” your voice cracks, hands gripping his brown locks tightly.
“fuckin’ love your tits, the most beautiful pair in this whole fucking world. so soft. so mine.” he whispers, his mouth trailing kisses down your stomach, stopping above your pubic bone.
he brings himself back up, parting your legs.
his middle finger slides across your already drenched cunt, feeling the pool of wetness.
“you’re so fucking wet, all f’ me?” he whispers, coming closer to press a soft kiss onto your quivering lips.
“h-has— always only been for you.”
“y-yeah?” his voice breaks, looking into your eyes as he pushes two fingers inside of you.
“you’re so fucking tight, needa— needa prep you for my cock or else, I’m gonna nut the moment I’m in you, baby. fuck.”
his fingers move skill fully, curling inwards as he hits the spot that makes you squirm underneath him.
“mm— kook! I’m gonna— fucking. c-cum!!!” you yell, as he quickens his pace, before pulling out.
he hears you whine, and uses it as a chance to press another kiss onto your lips. whispering an “I love you.” in between the kiss.
he pushes himself up to quickly remove his sweatpants, hovering over you immediately to attach his lips onto your neck.
“gonna mark you, angel. make sure everybody knows you’re mine. all— all fuckin’ mine.”
his lips devour your neck like he was a vampire that was incredibly parched, sucking and biting on every single spot of your neck.
by the time he was done, your whole neck, once an empty canvas, was painted with sweat and faded purple.
his face hovers above yours, looking into your eyes as he smiles softly.
“s-so sorry, baby. gonna— gonna fuck you so well, m’kay? make sure you cum s’ fuckin hard and make you feel so good.” he whispers, positioning his dick at the entrance of your cunt.
“k-ookie..” your voice trails out.
“what is it, baby?”
“love y-you, s’ much.” you were barely able to let out, eyes filled with tears, unable to see.
“fuck.”
his lips crashes onto yours, once again. and he finally, finally. pushes inside of you.
“nghh— fuck. angel, you’ve gotta unclench. please, baby. I’m gonna fuckin’ nut if you don’t. please—“ he whines, as he pushes his cock deeper inside of you.
“feels so b-big, koo. I can’t— can’t take it, mmf— wait.” you cry out, he’s never felt this big before. not like this.
you wonder whether if it was the intense amount of emotion that was making the both of you feel this way.
“you can take it, yeah? you were made to take my cock. just mine. only mine. fffuckkkk— can feel your cunt just swallowing me whole. feels, so fucking good, baby.”
"you’re mine," he murmurs, his thumb catching a tear on your cheek.
"tell me you're mine. tell me you’re mine while im fuckin’ you. you feel so good, baby. i love you so much. so much."
and right at the peak of it, when he’s deep inside of you and your breathing is completely shattered, he pauses for a split second, his chest heaving against yours.
"may I be your boyfriend?" he whispers pleasingly, his voice breaking as he pushes deep again. "please. be mine for real. let me treat you the way you deserve to be treated.”
"k-kook…yes," you sob, throwing your arms around his neck, pulling him down into another bruised kiss. "yes, jungkook, yes."
he groans, his pace getting a little faster, more intense but still so incredibly gentle.
you look up at him through your blurry vision, and you see it. small tears are actually falling from his own eyes, landing directly onto your already tear stained cheeks.
he’s crying with you, completely stripped of his armor, letting you see every single raw emotion he’s been hiding for months.
you couldn’t fucking believe it. couldn’t believe this was happening right now.
he keeps repeating it like a mantra against your lips, your neck, your shoulder. "i love you. i love you so much, baby."
“gonna fill you up so good. gonna put a ring on your fuckin’ finger. give you kids. buy you a fucking house. make sure you never have to lift a finger to work ever again. gonna do everything for you. build a whole life with you, you want that? baby?” he lets out, pulling himself slightly higher to slam into you harder.
“nghh— kookie! yes— mm! want— wanna have your kids!”
“yeah? gonna make that happen baby, gonna cum s’ deep inside of you until it sticks. make sure it doesn’t leak out of you.”
his hands held your legs apart as his pounds into you uncontrollably.
“I love you. love you so fuckin’ much. gonna fill you up so good. give you what you deserve. yeah?” he whispers.
“mmhh— please! please..!” you cry out, absolutely losing it the moment his fingers rub circles around your sensitive clit.
when he finally finishes inside of you, he pushes his cock deeper inside of you, refusing to let any of his seed leak out of you.
his forehead resting against your shoulder as he lets his weight settle over you for just a second.
after a few long minutes of just catching your breath, he pulls out slowly, wiping your tears when he hears you wince.
he lays down next to you, but jungkook doesn't reach for his phone this time.
instead, he immediately pulls you close against his chest, wrapping his strong arms around you and tucking your head securely under his chin.
he pulls the blanket all the way up over both of your shoulders, holding you so tight like he’s terrified you’ll disappear if he lets go.
his fingers are tracing slow, lazy circles on your bare shoulder, his chin resting right on top of your head.
you lay there for a long time, just listening to him breathe.
you… can’t believe this is happening. it feels like a fever dream. you’ve only dreamt of this ever happening to you with him.
"kook?" you whisper, your hand resting flat against his chest.
"yeah, baby?" his voice comes out soft.
"did you mean it? like, everything you said before?"
jungkook stops tracing your shoulder. he shifts slightly, propping himself up on one elbow so he can look down at you.
the dim light from the window hits his face, showing the slight bruise forming on his jaw and the tiny cut on his lip. his eyes are so soft, so entirely full of emotion it makes your chest ache all over again.
"every single fucking word," he whispers, his thumb gently wiping away a dry tear track on your cheek.
"i've never been more sure of anything in my life. i know i fucked up. i know i put you through so much bullshit because i was too much of a coward to face how i felt about you."
you look up at him, your eyes burning a little bit.
"i just... i spent months feeling like i was crazy, jungkook. i thought i was the only one feeling this. it hurt so bad."
"i know. and i hate myself for making you feel that way," he says, his voice cracking a little. he leans down, pressing his forehead against yours, his breath warm on your skin.
"i was just so scared that if i let myself love you, you’d realize i’m a mess and leave me. but watching you walk away last night? seeing you look at me like you completely hated me? that was way worse than any fear i had. i can't lose you, not now. not ever.”
you let out a soft breath, your fingers tangling into the hairs at the back of his neck, pulling him just a little bit closer. "you're not gonna lose me. i'm right here."
jungkook lets out this long, shaky sigh, like a massive weight has finally been lifted off his chest.
a tiny, breathless smile forms on his lips, and he kisses you.
"say you love me again," he murmurs against your mouth, his eyes burning into yours.
"i love you," you whisper.
"i love you." he says, his voice so thick with affection it completely melts you.
you laugh slightly, “why don’t you ever say ‘too’?”
he stares at you slightly, “I don’t love you because you love me. I love you, because I love you. because, you’re you.”
he drops back down onto the pillow, pulling you right back into his chest and wrapping his arms around you, burying his face in your neck.
you close your eyes, not wanting to say anything back. you feel so content it’s scary.
you can finally go to sleep in his arms without wondering if he’s going to be here in the morning
you can finally go to sleep without waking up earlier just to be able to get a glimpse of him before he leaves.
you can finally go to sleep without having to leave out an extra note pad so that he’d be able to leave you a letter in case he left in the middle of the night.
you can finally, go to sleep. knowing he’s yours. knowing he’s staying. and knowing that you both are exactly, where you guys want to be.
; teehee! lmk what you thought!! 🥹 lowk sleep deprived and about to go sleep for the next 24 hours
in which you’re in a “situation ship” with a guy that pushes you away with his words but pulls you back in with his touch. your “relationship” is practically a cycle of blurry, misunderstood 4am calls and unread texts that always ends with him pounding on your front door. he's never clear with what the both of you are, and he’s never transparent with the way he feels. so, the only thing that's left to wonder... is what the fuck does he actually mean?
warnings : jungkook is a manipulative bitch. ( slightly though ) vulgar language. oc has like zero self respect. ( STAND UPP ladies ) unprotected sex. he eats her out. overstimulation. breeding kink. bigdick!jk. he’s way too big for her and he makes sure she knows. he cums in her. he videotapes them & oc while they’re fucking. he uses another girl to make oc jealous. ( bitchy move jeon. ) I’m being so honest literally pure porn with a plot.
a/n: hi…so comeback post!! can’t believe it’s been almost 2 months since I last posted but THANK YOU bts for blessing me with new music that allowed me to wake the fuck up from my depressive episode and get my ass back in the studio. comeback post = 10 times the filth!! oh we been KNEWW. and obv in honour of bieberchella I had to use one of his songs as the title for this fic bcs tf his songs are the ultimate freak songs eva. anyways, I’ve missed all of you horny sweet angels sm <33
in which you move into a new apartment, only to find yourself at war with the neighbour next door. he’s insufferably arrogant as he is handsome. but between settling in and dealing with the jerk next door, what happens if you find out that the jerk next door is the guy you’ve been sexting online?
pairing : neighbour!jk x onlyfans!oc
warnings : unprotected sex, dom jungkook, big dick jk, cocky jk, creampie, sexting, masturbation, literally pwp, blowjob, handjob, eating out, jungkook calls oc a b!tch ( ladies LEAVE if your man ever calls you that please.) heavy amount of dirty talk. literally pure filth tbfh.
chapter 02 :
it’s been a week.
seven days, 10080 minutes and 604800 seconds.
and you’ve spent every single moment in confusion, denial and paranoia. ever since you put two and two together, you became avoidant. you were not only avoiding jungkook online, but also in real life.
jungkook was well aware of the sudden change in your persona. he tried to talk to you, tried to stir up conversation by knocking on your door in the middle of the night to bombard you with random questions.
and you weren’t stupid, you knew he was aware of the sudden change in your attitude, you’d usually bite back, be a bitch. but for the past week, it’s been none of that.
and online, ian— or should you just call him jungkook now, has been bombarding you with messages.
@ian97 : cupcake?
@ian97 : you busy with school? you haven’t replied.
@ian97 : you alive? haha
@ian97 : [ photo ] thinking of u
@ian97 : baby I’m starting to get worried, please tell me you’re okay. it’s been two days.
@ian97 : you haven’t been posting online either
@ian97 : fuck, I miss you sb
@ian97 : please. anything. say anything.
you scroll through the chat with jungkook, you feel horrible for avoiding him online, more so because you knew he had no idea what was going on, and to him you were still just a stranger.
a stranger who he’s been cyber sexting every day for the past few months. but whatever.
you sigh, realising you had to reply eventually.
@internetgirll : hey, ian.
you hit send, and almost immediately do you see the typing bubble appear on your screen.
@ian97 : holy shit, baby?
@ian97 : what the fuck happened??? I thought you were a goner or smth
@ian97 : is everything okay???
@internetgirl : I’m okay. it’s just been a rough week.
@internetgirll : sorry for ghosting you, I didn’t mean to do that.
@ian97 : oh, rough week.
@ian97 : it’s cool, I guess. just wished u would’ve said smth, y’know?
your thumb finds its way into your mouth as you bite your fingernail nervously. you still couldn’t believe the guy you’ve been dirty talking to online, is the guy next door.
hell, it’s only been a week and a half since you’ve moved here, what the actual fuck are you getting yourself into?
@internetgirll : I know, im sorry.
@internetgirll : it’s just, I don’t know. It’s a lot right now.
@internetgirll : just, can you not ask me any questions? I’d rather not talk about it. please?
@ian97 : right….alright, then. wtv you want baby.
@ian97 : just don’t ghost me like that again, got me all worried and scared y’know?
@internetgirll : I promise, no more of that.
@internetgirll : so how’ve you been?
the day goes on, and you and jungkook proceed to talk like normal online. but you’re in a perplex situation. the more you message “Ian” the more you realise how easy it is to talk to him on the Internet than in real life. because online, at least he didn’t know who you were — the real you.
your eyes flicker towards your apartment door, trying to sink in the fact that you were 3 feet away from the “stranger” on your phone. you feel fucking sick.
you didn’t want to tell him. you can’t. you shouldn’t. because what were you supposed to even say? “oh, hey! so you know the girl you’ve been sharing nudes with and jerking off to for the past few months is the girl next door that you kind of despise? and I knew about it all this while and I said absolutely nothing!”
“fuck, why am I doing this to myself? I’m telling him. I have to.” you say firmly, standing up abruptly to walk towards your apartment door.
you slip on your pink hello kitty sandals in a jiffy, and go to twist your door handle, when you freeze. your feet suddenly felt like they were deeply rooted in cement, you tried to move — spoiler alert, you couldn’t.
your lips purse as you let out a huge sigh, your forehead hits the white door in front of you as you let out a huge groan.
“why does this world hate me?” you groan, again.
the moment your eyes close against the front door, you hear rapid pounding that almost made you shit yourself.
you stumble back, clutching your chest as you gasp for air. "holy fuck—" you hiss, your voice cracking under the sheer volume of the noise.
who the hell knocks like that?
you take a shaky breath and press your eye to the peephole, squinting at the distorted image on the other side.
of course. it’s that fucking white tank that hugs his body ever so elegantly and those messy, dark curls that you’ve spent the last week dreaming about— and running from.
jeon jungkook.
your stomach drops into your toes. shit. he’s right there.
"okay, i'm telling him. i'm telling him, it’s now or never." you whisper to yourself, your hand trembling as you reach for the handle. but the second the door swings open, all that bravery you had two seconds ago evaporates into thin air, replaced by pure, unadulterated glitching.
"oh! jungkook? hi! jungkook! neighbor jungkook! the guy who lives... there!" you point aggressively at his door, your voice an octave higher than usual.
you stand there, frozen in your pink hello kitty sandals. "so…life! how is... life? and things? i was just... doing university things. science. math. big books. very busy!"
jungkook is standing there, hands shoved deep into his hoodie pockets. he looks at you like you’ve actually lost your mind. he looks hesitant, almost awkward.
his eyes search yours, probably trying to figure out why the girl who was almost kissing him against a desk a week ago has spent the last seven days acting like he’s a convicted felon.
and you can’t blame him, because what the actual fuck were you doing right now?
"uh... hey?" he says, his voice a little lower than usual. he clears his throat, shifting his weight from one leg to the other.
"uh, so. you've been... quiet. i thought maybe you died or moved out in the middle of the night. you’ve been acting like i have the plague every time i see you in the hall."
"moving? no. dying? hopefully soon— i mean, no!" you let out a forced, robotic laugh.
you're doing that thing where you can't stop moving your hands, so you just end up patting your own shoulders. "i'm fine! i'm just... into silence lately. silence is a great hobby. very meditative. big fan of not talking. you should try it!"
the moment you let out those last few words, your hands immediately fly up towards your mouth.
“no! I mean! I’m not telling you to shut up! talk, yell! I love when you talk!— I m-mean! I don’t love when you talk— like, just do what you want! human rights, you know! ” you ramble, laughing awkwardly.
jungkook lets out a huff that might be a laugh, but his brow is still furrowed in total confusion.
“okay, what the actual fuck is up with you? why’re you acting so…weird?” he questions, eyeing you up and down as if trying to analyse you.
you don’t answer, your lips simply purse, as your left foot taps rapidly onto the wooden floor beneath you.
he looks down at his shoes for a second before looking back up at you, his gaze softening just a fraction, sighing before speaking again.
"anyways. look, y/n... it’s been weird. since... you know. since the other night," he says, gesturing vaguely toward his apartment, his ears turning a faint shade of pink.
"the guys aren't coming over tonight. it’s just me. and i figured... maybe we should probably talk? like, actually talk. without the shouting and the thin walls and the audience, just thought maybe if we tried, we’d actually get along. y’know? "
you blink at him, your brain screaming “retreat! retreat!”
“YES!” you yell.
“what? no! what are you doing??” the voices in your head yell.
he’s taken back, obviously. he’s surprised and somewhat intrigued by your behaviour. or… weirded out? yeah, definitely that.
he continues, clearing his throat. "i— uh. okay, so my place. eight p.m.? i was gonna head out and buy some stuff. snacks. beer. whatever you like."
"drinks. eight. your place. cool. swell. fabulous. iconic," you ramble, nodding so fast you might give yourself whiplash.
“what the fuck?? say no! tell him the truth!”
"i'll be there. with my feet. and my... clothes. at eight. sharp.“
“oh my god. stop talking.”
jungkook stares at you for another three long seconds, his expression somewhere between "she's cute" and "i should probably call an ambulance for her."
"okay…” he says slowly, taking a step back toward his door. "eight then. try to... bring the version of yourself that doesn't sound like she just drank five espressos?"
"you got it!"
“you idiot.”
you give him a thumbs up. a literal, thumbs up…. your eyes immediately flicker towards your hand, bringing it down quickly.
and then you immediately want to curl up and die right there.
he smiles slightly, out of pity. you think.
“I’ll give you my number, just text me when you’re ready and about to come over. yeah?” he says casually, palm stuck towards you, gesturing you to hand over your phone so that he could type in his number.
your brain stops for a second, blinking rapidly before finally realising. you reach for your phone in your back pocket and unlock it, navigating to the contacts app before placing it onto his palm.
his gaze lingers on you for a few seconds before grabbing your phone. he types in his number and saves it swiftly, before passing it back to you.
“okay! well! bye!” you say quickly, too quickly.
he simply stares at you, says goodbye and then he turns around, scratching his head, muttering something that sounds suspiciously like "what is wrong with her" under his breath as he walks back to his apartment.
the second his door clicks shut, you slam yours and lean your back against the wood, sliding down until you're sitting on the floor in your hello kitty sandals. you bury your face in your hands, let out a muffled scream, and stare at the wall.
"what have i done?" you whisper to your empty living room.
you look at your phone, which is still sitting on the floor where you dropped it. there's a new message.
@ian97: hey, I’m gonna be offline for a few hours, just needa handle some stuff. I’m actually weirdly… nervous? I’ll tell u more about it once I’m done. I miss you. think of me?
you stare at the message, and then your head hits the door with a dull thud. "fucking hell."
you’re standing in front of your bedroom mirror, and for the tenth time in the last twenty minutes, you consider changing your shirt. you’re wearing a tiny pair of frayed denim shorts and a white hello kitty tank top— the one with the little red bow.
you’re usually not one to care about how you looked in front of other people, you knew you were hot and that’s all you needed to know. you don’t, and never will care about what people think. especially, men.
but why are you frantically raiding your closet as if you’re going on a date? you just want to look presentable, you tell yourself. you guiltrip, yourself.
whatever, fuck it. the hello kitty tank it is.
"it’s fine. it’s just a shirt," you mutter to your reflection.
you’re trying to manifest a confidence you definitely don't feel. today is the day, the day you tell him. you must. you will.
or at least you think you will…
the plan is simple. go over there, have one drink, and tell him. just spit it out. “hey jungkook, i’m the girl you’ve been sexting and paying for, sorry for the confusion, let’s be friends and stop being jerks to each other— and to each other’s pics.” easy. right?
wrong.
you grab your keys, take a deep breath that does absolutely nothing to calm your nerves, and step out into the hallway. the distance between 4b and 4a has never felt so vast. it’s three feet, but it feels like a marathon.
you reach his door and raise your hand to knock, but then you freeze. your knuckles are an inch away from the wood when you think, wait, what if he’s shirtless again? you pull your hand back. you reach out again. what if his friends are actually there and jungkook lied? hand back. you’re like a glitching video game character, your arm moving back and forth in a state of pure indecision.
"oh my gosh, just do it y/n. stop being such a pussy." you whisper.
your eyes close shut tightly, you swing your fist forward with all your might—and the door vanishes.
jungkook had pulled the door open at the exact same millisecond.
with no wood to stop your momentum, you fall forward, you let out a strangled scream as you collide with something solid and smelling faintly of expensive cologne.
your face buries itself directly into his chest, your hands instinctively grabbing onto his waist to stay upright.
the world really does hate you.
jungkook’s arms have instinctively wrapped around your waist to catch you, holding you flush against him.
you can feel the steady, rapid thrum of his heart through his t-shirt, and for five excruciating seconds, neither of you moves.
your head lifts up slightly, trying to sink in the position you’re in.
his eyes are burning into yours. they’re wide, just like yours. the two of you gulp simultaneously, internally trying to process what’s going on.
you finally realize where your hands are, clutched tightly to his hips, and you scramble backward so fast you almost trip over your own sandals.
his arms instinctively reach out to help you steady yourself, his tattooed hands halfway around your waist.
"oh! god! sorry! the door! it was... it wasn't there!" you stammer, your face heating up to a shade of red that surely matches your shirts hello kitty bow.
jungkook lets out a rough, awkward cough, his hand going to the back of his neck as he looks everywhere but at you. "yeah. i... i was just coming to see if you’d chickened out. i didn't expect a physical assault."
"it was an accident, calling it assault is a bit of a stretch. don’t you think? I was knocking…. just maybe too enthusiastically." you smile sarcastically.
"clearly," he mutters, though there's a tiny, genuine smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. he steps aside, gesturing into the apartment.
"come in."
you hesitantly walk inside, his place looking a lot more spacious considering there aren’t 6 other people taking up every inch of the apartment.
you noticed that laid out on the black marble kitchen island is a spread of fried chicken, tteokbokki, and two green bottles of soju with shot glasses.
"sit," he says, nodding toward the high chairs.
you climb onto the stool, your legs dangling as you watch him crack open the soju. the silence is heavy, but not as sharp as it usually is.
“so..”
“so.”
you clear your throat slightly, wondering why the atmosphere’s temperature felt like you were in the vicinity of the sun.
jungkook sighs, then speaks first.
“just make yourself comfortable, it’s kinda offensive seeing you that stiff.”
your eyes flicker towards him, as you watch his hands move towards the neon green soju bottles, cracking it open swiftly.
you nod slightly, internally telling yourself to say something. anything.
you clear your throat, “you didn’t have to order in this much, I’m not a big eater.”
he doesn’t reply, he simply pushes his hair back, and pushes a shot glass in front of you.
“you want it neat?”
you shake your head. “that’s boring. I want lemon and three cubes of ice.”
his eyebrow raises slightly. “three?”
you nod.
he scoffs playfully, almost flirtatious. “aren’t you specific.”
“I’m not specific. I just know what I want.”
his movements freeze, and he’s fully looking at you. into, you.
“decisive.” a small grin forms on his face.
“high-standards.”
he freezes. “touché.”
he hands you the shot glass, his eyes never looking away from yours. so you don’t look away from his either.
your fingers brush against his slightly as you grab the glass from his hand. the subtle touch sending a familiar vibration to your core.
his hand retreats back to pick up his own shot glass, holding it in front of you slightly, making a gesture for you to clink glasses with him.
“what are we toasting to?” you question, raising an eyebrow slightly.
he shrugs, eyes on yours. “to knowing what you want.”
your eyes squint slightly, as you bring your shot glass closer towards his. and somehow the tension between the two of you was still louder than the glass sound of the two cups hitting each other.
you feel a familiar burning sensation when the silver liquid passes down your throat.
“so, how was your day?” he asks.
you can’t help but scoff slightly, a small smile playing its way onto your lips. “you called me over for drinks at night to ask me how my day was? I thought you wanted to talk.”
you observe as he sucks in his cheeks in slight annoyance, “i did. I still do. sue me for wanting to ease into the conversation.” he says.
“really? how much are you willing to give me?” you lay your chin in your hand as your head tilts mockingly.
you see a small smirk form as he leans back into his chair, tattooed arms crossing with one another.
“are you always this difficult? weren’t you stuttering in front of me a few hours ago?” he questions back, mockingly.
your sarcastic smile drops ever so subtly, “I wasn’t stuttering.”
he grins, nodding his head. “sure. let’s go with that, princess.”
the both of you stay silent for a few minutes, unsure of who was going to speak next.
you were planning what to say in your head, but he beats you to it.
"i really was a jerk that first day," he says suddenly, staring at the label on his bottle. "the water spill. i was just in a bad mood, and you were so loud, and i just doubled down because it was easier than apologizing.“
your eyes shoot up to look at him, surprised by his honesty. you tried to search his face for any sign of insincerity, but you failed to find any.
“you were just trying to move in, and I would’ve been mad too if it was my first day here and I was already exhausted from moving things, only to have someone pour water all over me and my belongings.” he speaks, genuinely.
“I was a jerk, I know. and I’m sorry.”
you sigh slightly, "it’s okay. I guess I should’ve heard you out too. I shouldn’t have snapped when you were just trying to help.” you say back, genuinely.
“butttttt, you were still a massive jerk, jungkook. i actually went into my room and flipped your door off for five minutes."
he lets out a genuine laugh, a low, melodic sound that makes your chest tighten. "i deserve that. i’ve just... i’ve been on my own for a while. you get used to being the jerk so people don't get too close. it’s a bad habit, I guess.”
“I get it.” your voice comes out soft.
“you do?” he questions, looking up at you.
“yeah. once you get older, you gradually start to distance away from most people. and day by day you’re drowned with responsibilities. and yeah sure, you have friends. but at the end of the day, with everything that’s going on in your life, you still feel lonely. you feel— “
“trapped.”
your eyes lock with his again.
“yeah. trapped.”
you can’t help but stare at him, your lips part slightly, intrigued.
the both of you simultaneously down another shot, sitting in silence for another 60 seconds.
the silence stretches, but for the first time, it’s not jagged. it’s heavy.
you’re sitting here sharing a soul deep moment with him, and you’re still a liar. you’ve totally forgotten why you were even here in the first place. you were supposed to tell him the truth.
the air in the kitchen feels thin, and you need to start talking before you do something stupid, like confess everything right then and there.
you reach for a piece of fried chicken, trying to look busy, but as you lean forward, the movement pulls the fabric of your hello kitty tank top tight.
you see his eyes track the movement, and then they freeze.
the softness in his face vanishes, replaced by a sharp, focused intensity.
he leans in, his elbows resting on the marble, bringing his face inches away from your arm. his gaze is burning a hole into the graphic on your shirt.
"that shirt," he says, "i've seen that before."
you stop chewing, your heart dropping into your stomach. "it's just a shirt. have you never seen hello kitty before?"
"no," he murmurs, his eyes narrowing as they flick from the shirt up to your eyes, searching.
"that red bow is awfully familiar. feel like I’ve seen it before.”
you feel the sweat prickle at your hairline. your mind is racing, trying to remember the last photo you sent to him online.
did you wear this? fuck. you don’t know. maybe you did, before you even moved here.
"you're being weird," you say, letting out a nervous laugh that sounds fake even to your own ears. "you've probably just seen it on your feed or something. almost every girl owns something hello kitty related.”
he shakes his head, like he’s still searching for the exact image in his head. “no, I swear I’ve seen it before.”
you’re starting to get annoyed. why can’t he just let it go? “can you just drop it? what’s the big deal? literally every other girl owns something like this.”
"you're anything but every other girl y/n," he scoffs slightly, his voice laced with suspicion.
you almost choke. “come again? what the fuck is that supposed to mean?” you snap, your voice a little too high, a little too defensive. your body lifts itself off the high chair, slipping out of it slightly.
"it means every other girl doesn't give me this much of a hard time,” he murmurs, his gaze dropping to the graphic on your shirt again, then back to your lips.
"every other girl doesn't have a smart ass mouth that makes me want to either yell at her or kiss her.” he spits, standing up himself, as he walks closer towards you.
your head tilts cockily, “you wanna kiss me?”
he’s close now, too close. his fingers gently brush against your left cheek, as his eyes burn into yours.
“I wanna shut you up. kiss that attitude out of you.” he whispers, and you feel his breath against your lips.
“then why aren’t you? scared?”
“no. I just know what I want.” he mocks.
“and what do you want?”
“you, to beg.”
“aren’t you demanding.” you mock.
“no, I just have high-standards.” he grins slightly.
the air between you is vibrating, so thick with tension that it feels like any second the whole kitchen might just go up in flames.
you’re looking up at him, your heart hammering against your ribs rapidly.
his hand slides from your cheek, his thumb dragging slowly along your jawline before hooking under your chin, forcing you to tilt your head back just a fraction more. his eyes are dark, focused entirely on your mouth as his thumb brushes against your bottom lip.
“think you can meet them?” he asks.
“please.” you scoff. “you’re not on my level.” you spit, letting him caress your bottom lip.
he hums slightly, “is that so?”
“you’re infuriating. you’re loud. you’re cocky and you—“
"and i what?" he whispers, his hand moving to rest on the counter right next to your hip. his fingers just barely brush against the denim of your shorts, and you feel the heat of him through the fabric. "finish the sentence, princess."
“finish, the sentence.” he whispers, eyes never leaving yours.
“don’t call me that.” you hiss, your heart hammering so hard you’re sure he can hear it. the heat radiating off him is making your head spin.
your hands fly up to his chest to push him away, but it lingers there for a few seconds.
you finally push him back and away from you. “im going home.” your tone flat.
“so soon?” he mocks, hands shoving themselves in his pockets.
“take a fucking hike.” you spit.
“I’d love to, provided you come with.” he’s having too much fun, and god were you pissed.
you turn around to grab your phone, before walking towards the door.
“why would I? I’d be honoured! especially when your tombstone lists the cause of death as missing me too much.”
you slip on your sandals, satisfied with the way his jaw clenches slightly. “thanks for the soju, try not to miss me too much.”
you’re halfway out the door when you turn back around, “and fyi, jimin was a better host. tell him I said hi, will you?”
you’re back in the safety of your own bedroom, but the air feels tight, like the walls are closing in on you. you’re absolutely fuming.
every time you replay the last ten minutes in your head, your blood pressure spikes. you’re aggressively pouring yourself a glass of water, the ice clinking violently against the glass, and you find yourself whispering insults to the empty kitchen. "fucking jerk. arrogant, self-centered, annoying-ass piece of work."
you’re so annoyed that you can still feel the ghost of his touch on your skin, the way his thumb brushed your jaw.
it’s infuriating how he can be so sweet and genuine one second, talking about feeling trapped and lonely, and then turn into the devil’s child the next.
you huff, stomping over to your desk and flipping open your laptop. you have a uni project due, something mindless and data heavy that should, in theory, drown out the sound of your own frantic thoughts.
you start typing, staring at the screen until the letters blur together, trying to force yourself to care about academic sources instead of him.
you ignore it.
it buzzes again. and again. and again. a rapid fire succession of texts that makes your phone skitter across the desk.
"fuck's sake, give it a rest!" you snap at the silent room.
you’re so frustrated, so blinded by the leftover adrenaline from the fight, that you don't even look at the lock screen properly.
you just want the noise to stop. another buzz happens, and you blindly swipe down on the banner as it appears at the top of your screen, pulling up the quick reply box while your eyes stay glued to your laptop monitor.
new notification : hey, you busy? I wanna see what you’re wearing.
is he serious?
is he seriously still thinking about the hello kitty tank top you were wearing earlier? this is just pissing you off even more.
you're just done. so done. your fingers fly across the screen, fueled by pure, unadulterated petty rage.
you : can you literally shut up? i told you it’s just a shirt. you’re obsessed and it’s weird. go bother jimin if you’re that bored, i’m sure he’d love to hear your delusional theories at 2am. leave me alone. goodnight, jungkook.
you hit send with a vicious tap, toss the phone onto the couch behind you, and go back to your typing.
five minutes pass. ten. the silence in your apartment is suddenly deafening.
you keep glancing over your shoulder at the couch, waiting for the screen to light up. but it stays dark. your stomach does a weird, uncomfortable flip.
maybe you went too far? maybe mentioning jimin was the thing that finally made him back off?
whatever. he did this to himself. he chose to push.
you’re still curious, though. you’re just about to reach for the phone to check if he even read it when a sudden, violent banging erupts from your front door.
you swear your heart nearly stops.
"you have got to be kidding me," you hiss, standing up and smoothing down your nightgown.
it’s a silk slip, a little shorter than it should be and definitely more revealing than you’d like for a confrontation, but you’re too angry to care.
you rip the door open, ready to scream, but the words die in your throat.
[ a/n : play chase atlantics’s song ‘into it’ on loop now! trust me bunnies! ]
jungkook is standing there. he’s still in the same clothes, but his hair is a mess, like he’s been running his hands through it over and over.
he isn't smirking. he doesn’t even look angry. he’s just... staring. his eyes move from your face, down to the silk of your gown, and then back up, his jaw clenched so tight a muscle is leaping in his cheek.
"what?" you snap, crossing your arms over your chest to try and hide how much you're shaking. "what do you want? it’s two in the morning, jungkook.”
you wait for a reply, but receive none. he’s simply staring, like he’s trying to figure you out, for the 90th time.
“oh my god hello? why are you just standing there like a statue?" you reply in annoyance.
he doesn't answer at first. he just exhales a long, shaky breath, stepping forward until he’s crossing the threshold of your apartment, forcing you to back up.
he closes the door behind him with a soft, ominous click.
you’re taken aback by the self invitation into your apartment.
“the fuck— excuse you—“
"jimin," he says, his voice a low, dangerous vibration. "how do you know jimin’s name, y/n?"
"what? he was here last week. me and him literally had full blown conversations multiple times when he invited me over. do you suffer from short term memory loss—“
"no," jungkook says, taking another step until you're backed up against the wall of your small hallway.
he pulls out his phone, the screen bright in the dim light. he flips it around. "tell me why i just got a message. from a girl i’ve been talking to for months. a girl who knows everything about me, mentally and…. physically, but knows nothing about my personal life nor the people I’m friends with"
he states, eyes burning into yours, “oh, and she called me by my real name. the name I’ve never even told her about before. so, care to explain?”
you look at the screen. its the chat between you and him, on an awfully familiar platform. and that’s when it hits you. you look up to the top of his phone screen and see your the user. @internetgirll.
your heart stops. you freeze, your breath hitching in your throat as you look from the phone up to his dark, searching eyes.
did you? did he? was the message you received just now from ‘online jungkook’?
wait, so that would mean….
"internet girl." he whispers, the name sounding heavy and strange coming from his lips.
fuck.
"jungkook, i—"
"don't," he cuts you off, pinning you with a look that makes your knees buckle.
"don't even try to fucking lie, y/n. i've been losing my mind for a week trying to figure out why the girl next door felt so familiar. i knew something was off, but the moment you mentioned my friend, it finally clicked.”
“tell me right now, y/n. tell me how long you've known it was me."
you gulp, nervously. this was it, you had to tell him.
“I knew ever since that night. I became suspicious after you called me that fuck of a nickname in your bedroom. and then your friends called you ian.” you explained.
“that did it for me. but I was still in denial, a part of me didn’t want it to be true. didn’t want it to be you,” your eyes were no longer looking into his.
“so I texted you, asked you what you were wearing. and that confirmed my suspicions. and I— I didn’t know what to do. so. so I ghosted you, avoided you.” you let out in one breath.
you see him scoff. he runs his hand through his hair as he throws his head back, chuckling sarcastically.
“can’t fucking believe this is happening, and you thought you could just get away with it.” he spits, unknowingly taking steps closer towards you in your apartment.
“so you act like a princess with me online, but run your fucking mouth with me in real life. how does that work y/n?— or should I call you cupcake? you like when I call you that shit over the phone yeah?”
what have you done. you should’ve just told him.
you jump slightly when you feel your lower back hit the kitchen island. he’s close now, too close. his eyes are pouring into yours. you can finally see his tattoos up close, every single one of them that contributes to his mouth watering sleeve.
your eyes accidentally, and shamelessly, flicker down towards his shirtless body. and that doesn’t go unnoticed by him.
a small smirk plays its way onto the corner of his lips. “you don’t even seem apologetic. cat got your tongue, princess?”
you gulp, pushing down that unwanted nervous feeling. “pftt— you wish. but you know what, you’re right. i’m not sorry, because you’re nothing but a fucking jerk.” you spit.
“so fucking hot, but so fucking infuriating at the same time. how does that work, jungkook?— or should I call you ian instead?” you spit back the same phrase he said to mock you.
you see him pause, his eyes looking into yours as if he’s about to explode in any second.
his jaw clenches, as his tongue poked his inner left cheek.
you smile internally, satisfied with the way your words affected him. “or maybe I should call one of your friends instead. since you’re all bark no bite. what’s his name… taehyung? he’s pretty cute, oh! or maybe jimin, he’d so talk me through it—“
you weren’t able to finish that sentence, because the moment the name of his friends left your pretty mouth, he lost it.
his lips crashed into yours, as his body pushed you further back into the kitchen island
his tattooed hand clawed at your waist, as the other one positioned itself at the back of your head, pushing your face closer into his.
the kiss is desperate, hungry, and fueled by a week’s worth of bottled up frustration.
when he finally pulls back just an inch, his lips are swollen and his breathing is ragged, ghosting over yours as he keeps you pinned against the cold marble of the kitchen island.
“say their names again. I dare you. I want to see if you can even get them out while I’m reminding you exactly who you belong to."
your breathing is rapid, heavy. your hands rest weakly on his tattooed chest, unable to bite back this time.
"you wanted to know what I’d do to you if I were here? look at me, y/n. I wanna see you look into my eyes and tell me you still want to call another man after tonight.”
you don’t even give him the satisfaction of an answer. instead, you slide your hands up from his chest, your fingers tangling into the soft, messy curls at the nape of his neck, and you pull him back down.
this time, there’s no hesitation.
he groans into your mouth, his hands aren't gentle. one stays locked on your waist, pulling you up so you’re almost sitting on the edge of the marble island.
while the other moves to the small of your back, pressing you flush against the heat of his bare skin. the contrast between the freezing marble behind you and his searing body in front of you is enough to make your head spin.
his kiss turns deeper, more possessive, his tongue sweeping against yours in a way that feels like he's marking his territory. you can taste the faint hint of the soju you shared earlier, but mostly you just taste him.
it’s overwhelming. it’s too much and yet not enough.
you pull back just a fraction, both of you gasping for air, your foreheads leaning against each other. his eyes are still dark, blown out with a hunger that makes you shiver.
"i hate you," you whisper, though your voice is thick with a desire that says the exact opposite.
"good," he rasps, his lips brushing against your jaw as he trails a path of fire down to your neck.
"keep hating me, princess. as long as you're doing it right here. with me. in my arms.”
he bites softly at the sensitive skin just below your ear, and you let out a sharp, broken gasp, your back arching involuntarily. his grip on your waist tightens, his knuckles white against the dark emerald silk of your nightgown.
"you have no idea how long i've wanted to shut you up like this," he murmurs against your skin, his voice sending a fresh wave of heat through you.
“you’ve yet to succeed.” you speak against his lips, attempting to seem held together but the shakiness in your voice is present.
you hear and feel him grin next to your ear, “and yet here you are, beneath me. letting me do what I want.”
he brings his face up in front of you again to look at you better.
“you’re doing what you want because I’m letting you.” you say, keeping your ego high.
his hands are already wandering, you feel his left hand slide gracefully up your thigh and up your silk night gown.
the moment he reaches the hem of your panties, you let out a soft hitch.
his eyes never leave yours and his fingers trace the outline of your core.
“you’re fucking soaked, baby. all for me?” he teased.
he slips a finger into your panties, now touching your bare cunt. “what happened? weren’t you all mouthy with me just a second ago, hm?,” he smirks. asshole. “guess I’ve succeeded, haven’t I, cupcake?”
his ring finger circles your dripping, sensitive clit painfully slow.
“mhmm— fuck.” you moan out, hands flying to grip his shoulders for support.
his smirk widens. asshole.
he feels your fingers dig into his shoulders, your nails biting into his skin through the sheer force of the pleasure he’s forcing out of you. he loves it. he loves the way you look so submissive under his touch.
“look at you,” he rasps, leaning in so his nose brushes against yours. “so loud when you’re complaining about my music, but now you can barely get a word out. what happened to that attitude, baby?”
you bite your lip, trying to suppress the next moan, your eyes flashing with a mix of heat and defiance. “don’t... don’t get ahead of yourself. just because you can finally do something useful with those hands.”
his eyes darken, his thumb pressing down hard against your clit in a sudden, sharp movement that sends a jolt of electricity straight to your toes. you gasp, your hips bucking instinctively against him.
“useful, huh?” he chuckles, a low, dangerous sound. “i can be a lot more ‘useful’ than this. but i think you like it this way. i think you like me telling you to shut up every five seconds. you like me taking my time while you sit here and try to pretend you aren't losing your mind.”
he adds a second finger, sliding them both inside you with a shallow, teasing thrust that makes your breath hitch. he’s purposely staying shallow, avoiding the depth you’re clearly aching for just to keep you on edge.
fuck, the biggest fucking asshole to ever roam this planet.
“tell me,” he murmurs, his lips ghosting over your jawline. “is this what you imagined when you were typing all those messages to me? did you think i’d be this much of a jerk in person, too?”
“i thought... i thought you’d be a lot faster,” you manage to choke out, your head falling back against the marble as you try to catch your breath.
“are you always this slow, jungkook? or are you just scared you won't know what to do if I actually stop talking?”
he freezes for a split second, his jaw clenching at your words.
he pulls his hand out completely, the sudden absence of him leaving you feeling cold and empty. you let out a frustrated whine before you can stop yourself, and he catches it, his smirk turning predatory.
“scared?” he repeats, as he laughs slightly out of disbelief. “you want it fast? you want me to stop being a jerk?”
your head tilts up to look at him, nodding slightly.
“then earn it.”
he pulls you towards your couch, quickly. before sitting down on it.
“on your knees, now.” he speaks, demanding.
you don’t respond, nor give him face. you simply push the coffee table back and drop down onto your knees.
“mm. pretty girl.” he whispers, looking at you.
“c’mon, make me proud. do what you said you’d do to me every night over the phone.” he nudges at his sweatpants.
your hands hover over his grey sweatpants before tugging his sweats and boxers down swiftly. you watch as his cock springs free. it’s big, fuck. and he’s hard. so…fucking hard.
you gulp subtly, already picturing him fucking you into your pink hello kitty bedsheets.
“baby.” he snaps you back into reality.
“chickening out already? I thought—“
your mouth moves to engulf his cock, not allowing him to finish his sentence.
jungkook’s breath hitches. his arms drop to his sides, his fingers twitching as if he wants to grab you, but he forces himself to stay still.
he lets out a choked, guttural sound, his head falling back as his eyes flutter shut. “f-fuck, baby… taking me so well.”
your mouth moves rhythmically, sucking and bobbing your head up and down. spitting on it occasionally.
“baby— y/n. fuckkkk. mmhm, doing so— fuck— well.”
you’re pleased. you see the way his knees almost buckle, the way he’s suddenly the one gasping for air. “what happened, kookie?” you whisper, leaning in to lick a stripe up his neck, mimicking the way he teased you before. “cat got your tongue?”
“shit, say that name again.”
“what? kookie?” you question innocently, your long lashes batting up at him.
his head falls back the moment his name leaves your lips, and your hands stroke his sensitive cock.
you let your mouth sink back down onto his cock, playing with his tip whenever you feel like it. just because you can.
“princess, gonna— fuck, gonna cum if you keep sucking me off like that.” he whines.
you spit, sucked and slobbered. he’s convinced, no, he knows, this is the best head he’s ever received in his life.
“fuck fuck fuck! fuck I’m—“ he yells slightly, as thick ropes of white liquid shoots out of his cock, landing inside your mouth.
“shiiittttt.” he whines, breathing heavily.
your eyes lock with his and you make sure he watches you swallow his semen, a little bit of it dripping down your chin.
“fucking shit.” he rasps, slamming his lips onto yours, as he picks you up swiftly, holding your thighs firmly.
he kicks open your bedroom door, and drops you onto your bed.
you bounce slightly against the dark sheets, your emerald silk gown riding up to your waist, but you don't move to cover yourself.
he immediately hovers you, sitting on his knees as his hands move to take your clothes off.
“this needs to go, now.”
his hands take your clothes off quickly, frustratedly.
and when he sees your body bare for the first time in real life, he fucking loses it.
“fuck, look at these tits.” he whispers, leaning down to take your nipple in his mouth.
“kookie— mmhm!” the ego you were trying to uphold is long gone.
all you wanted right now was him.
his tongue swirls around your red bud, sucking and biting light enough to make you go feral.
your hands lightly push his head closer as your back arches upwards.
he releases your nipple with a ‘pop’ sound, before moving over to appreciate the other.
“mmf— fuck. hottest tits I’ve ever— mmf— fucking, seen.” he talks in between sucking your bud, worshiping how incredibly hot you look right now.
he finally releases. moving back up to press his lips onto yours.
his calloused hands roam all over your body, before it tugs your underwear down.
“eyes on me. watch as I ruin you.” he demands, kissing down your body.
his hands push open your legs as his face finally meets your cunt.
“you gonna do something? or you just gonna stare like a fucking dog.” your ego is back, or maybe it’s just the fact that you’re incredibly horny right now.
his eyes snap to look into yours, before his mouth lands on your clit.
his nose grazed your throbbing nub every time he releases to spit saliva onto your pussy.
you yanked at his hair, clearly impatient. “Nghh!”
“so fucking needy.” he teased, tongue lapping your clit skillfully.
“fuck— my god, kookie,” your hips bucked against his face, unable to speak anything that came to your mind.
“you taste so good, fuck. wish I had a chance to eat this pussy earlier.”
his tongue moved faster around your clit, sucking and swirling whenever he could.
“mmhh! gonna cum— please!” you yell, legs shaking slightly as your orgasm was arriving.
“yeah? gonna cum? for me?”
your mouth makes an “O” shape the moment your orgasm hits you. legs shaking as you release your contents onto his tongue.
“nghh! oh my gosh—“
“fuck, that’s it. let me taste you, baby.” he groans as his tongue catches your fluid, swallowing quickly.
your breathing is heavy, rapid. you watch as he climbs back up on top of you, as his lips devour yours again. you could taste your fluids on his tongue.
he pulls away, “can’t do this. need to fuck you now, before I lose my goddamn mind.”
“please.” you beg, and he smirks.
“condom?” he asks.
you shake your head. “I’m clean. want you raw, please.” you whisper, bringing his head down towards you.
the egoistic mask that’s always covering his face glitches for a second, and you catch him fold.
“fuck. wanna take me raw? let me fill you up?” he whispers, almost as if he was pleading for you to say yes.
and the moment a nod of confirmation is observed by him, his cock is already positioned in front of your dripping cunt.
he pushes the tip in and out slightly, teasingly.
“don’t think it’ll fit.” you whisper.
his eyes close for a split second, his cock getting harder by your words. it’s making him cockier.
“too huge for you mama? we’ll make it fit, don’t worry.”
he finally, finally, pushes into you.
“fucckkkk.” you whine, back arching as you feel his huge cock fill the emptiness that’s always present in your cunt.
“mmf— stop— stop clenching baby, fuck I’m gonna nut just from you clenching like this.”
“can’t— I’m gonna—“
his eyes widen slightly, were you about to cum just from him slipping into your pussy?
“what? fuck, say that again. you gonna cum when I haven’t even moved yet? dick too good, huh?” he teases, his ego flying through the roof the more you speak.
“s-hut— shut the fuck up, and move.” you hiss.
he grins slightly, “mm, whatever you want baby.”
his cock finally moves inside of you, moving slowly before he started to thrust into you violently.
“fuck! fuck fuck fuck! jungkook— mmf— wait you’re too, fuck slow down!” you whine, unable to form words as his huge cock takes over you.
“can’t take my fucking dick? ha. so were you just all talk online then? fucking take it.” he dismisses your requests, continuing to thrust into you violently.
your pussy tightened around him the more he thrusted into you, your nails were clawing at his skin, he was probably bleeding slightly from how hard you were tugging at his back. but you didn’t give a fuck, no. not right now.
“f-fuck, loosen up baby— fuck, you’re taking me so well. such a perfect girl, with such a perfect fucking pussy.”
his words are doing something to you, his words are making you go feral.
“say it. who’s fucking you baby? c’mon, look at me.” his right hand tilts your chin to face him as his eyebrows raise slightly.
“not gonna say it? fine. have it your way.” he slows down slightly, watching you whine before suddenly slamming into you again, without warning.
“ngghh! fuck! fuck! you!” you cry out, you’ve yet to cum and you’re already overstimulated.
“not good enough. my name. say my fucking name.”
both of his hands hold your hips firmly, slamming into you, keeping his pace steady.
“jungkook!” you yell out, tears threatening to fall down your cheeks.
“that’s right. that’s— fucking right.” his voice trails off as his head falls back slightly, slowing down his thrusts
.
he fucks into you slowly, but forcefully. hitting the spot up inside you.
“fuckkkk. you feel me? feel me fucking up inside of you?”
you nod quickly, “f-feel you, feel you here.” you reply quietly, taking his hand, that was digging into your hip, and placing it on your belly.
he loses it. like actually, loses it.
his pace quickens, faster than before. “f-fuck, gonna— gonna split you in half. you’d like that, yeah?”
his fingers move down to circle your clit messily, “gonna give it to you, cupcake. gonna fill you up, the way I’ve been wanting to. gonna fill you up so well you’ll be dripping for days.”
“and then I’m gonna— fuckkk. gonna fuck it back into you, I’ll— shit. I’ll make sure it never leaves you. make sure you’re full of me.”
you’re crying. you’ve never felt so fucking good.
“please! please please please.” you chant like a broken recorder.
and with one final thrust, your orgasm hits you heavily. your legs shake as you yell out his name again and again.
jungkook groaned loudly as his own orgasm finally reached him. his head falls back and curses come out of his swollen lips. “h-holy fuck.”
he watches as your back arches, completely fucked out from your second orgasm. his eyes land at his cock stuffed into your cunt. fluids mixed, bed ruined, and both of you so fucking sore.
he pulls out slowly, hearing you wince at the emptiness.
his exhausted self drops down beside you, into the hello kitty bedsheet.
jungkook shifts on the ruined sheets, his tattooed arm reaching out to pull the discarded duvet over both of your cooling bodies. the arrogance from ten minutes ago has evaporated, replaced by a heavy, sleepy warmth. he rolls onto his side, his nose brushing against your temple.
"hey," he whispers, his thumb tracing a lazy circle on your hip.
"what?" you murmur, your eyes already fluttering shut.
"you're actually a terrible liar," he says softly. "all those months online... i should've known it was you. no one else is that annoying."
you poke his chest weakly. "shut up, jungkook."
"make me," he murmurs, but instead of a challenge, he just presses a lingering, tender kiss to your forehead.
you let out a soft giggle, “you weren't exactly a genius either. you spent twenty minutes staring at a hello kitty shirt in your kitchen before you finally put two and two together."
"i was distracted," he counters, his grip on your hip tightening possessively. "hard to think straight when the girl you’ve been wanting to choke for a week is sitting in your kitchen looking like that."
you hear his chest heave with a silent, exhausted chuckle. he shifts, propping himself up on one elbow so he can look down at you.
"not even gonna deny that, baby." he murmurs, his thumb moving up to brush against your lower lip, which is still swollen from his kisses.
you smile. “if it makes you feel any better, I think you’re incredibly hot too. always have.”
“yeah?”
“yeah.”
he smiles, and looks at you genuinely. not out of lust. he looks at you like maybe this could lead somewhere.
and for the first time in his life, he’s never felt so sure about an impulsive decision.
he looks at you, and realises that this is definitely not going to be one of those situations where he fucks a girl and then ditches her the next day.
he looks at you, and realises…this messy, infuriating, yet beautiful connection the two of you have, may be just the thing that he needs, forever.
a/n : hi my lovelies! <33 eeekkk I’ve finally finished this two-shot! listennnn, I’ll be honest, I’m quite shit when it comes to writing smut… I had to listen to chase atlantic on REPEAT just so i could curate the vibe perfectly, so I hope it met your standards <33 as always thank you so much for reading & lmk what you thought below! 🤍
