#jesus discourse

[anthonycrowleymoved]

sometimes i’m like ‘fanfiction can’t shock me anymore i’m numb to it’ then i find this shit

[thorbisecshual]

hey quick question but why is jesus so, uh.... so fucking,,,, ripped,,,,, in every painting and sculpture???? ever???

[anthonycrowleymoved]

me: judas was a service top

my seventh grade religion teacher: how did you get into my house

[anthonycrowleymoved]

in all seriousness though ‘jesus topped all of the apostles’ is the hottest take i have ever seen

[anthonycrowleymoved]

What’s the point of Jesus having a big dick if he’s not a top

i love how this ask doesn’t even entertain the notion of jesus christ not having a monster dong

[anthonycrowleymoved]

when i die and arrive at the pearly gates saint peter’ll be like ‘yanno you’ve done some wild things so you would have probably gone to hell anyway but above all you started a conversation about whether or not judas was topped by jesus or the other way around and listen that’s. we just can’t have that here that was really the nail in the coffin after that happened really nothing you could do could salvage that’ and i’ll just be like ‘understandable have a nice day’ and then i’ll go to hell and be tortured for all eternity but like. the demons find it funny so they’re cool with me 

[anthonycrowleymoved]

Not a link but yeah

[anthonycrowleymoved]

My friend said they have a friend who is convinced Jesus was a service top

i mean he does seem like the type but why must you all force me to read these words