#jonathantylan

[greatgrandchildrenofthestars]

“god you make me feel alive”

Vincent blinked, a smear or yellow-green paint contrasting the slight flush rising to his cheeks.

His fiery red curls bouncing as he stepped back from the canvas, looking over at Jonathan as he sat pristinely in the model chair.

"That's a bit extreme isn't it...? All I asked as if you'd be my model..."

[timebird84]

Dear @jonathantylan,

this is your Secret Santa tagging you and this picture of the weirdest crossover I’ve probably ever done in my entire life (Daroga riding a dragon - don’t ask me why, I’ve no idea XD) is the first part of your gift! I hope you like it! It was the first image that popped up in my head, when you said you liked the Daroga and dragons XD. The other part is on its way to you. Sadly, I’m pretty sure it won’t reach you before Christmas, but it will come! Please let me know, when you get it. It was fun to get to know you a little better and I hope I could find something that will fit your interests (and taste).

Yours,

Secret Santa aka Timebird84 aka Sonja :)

[earlgraytay]

I've had conflicting thoughts about Rudolph ever since I learned the name means "victorious wolf".

Then one foggy Christmas Eve

Santa came to say

“Rudolph with your teeth so bright

Please don’t eat my sleigh tonight”

[conservativemalarkey]

For all the jokes I see about feminists (and, frankly, anybody left-of-center) not having a sense of humor, I don't see much in the way of conservative humor. There's Anne Coulter, "Roseanne", Milo Yiannopoulos (I think), and...well, I'm not sure. A lot of it seems to not translate well, but when pressed, I've only been told I'm too stupid to understand it.

First off: you’re not stupid. They’re mean. If someone tells you you’re too stupid to understand something, they are a jerk and you have the right to ignore them.

Now that that’s out of the way…. 

Conservative humour is all about punching down and conformity. Like a lot of things that are part of conservative culture, it is very focused on keeping ingroup cohesion over most other values. Like, say, ‘kindness’ or ‘curiosity’. 

So conservative ‘humour’ - what little I’ve seen of it; mostly National Review columnists who were trying to be Funny About The Disk Horse, minion memes, and crap from the alt-right really- is mostly about saying “we are not like these other people, you know, the shitty ones.”

People come together more easily when they have some shared dislike. A good example of this (...that’s not likely to be controversial on the hellsite) is Straight People Performatively Bitching About Their Spouses. The straight people who keep going “ach, [my spouse’s gender] must be a whole nother species, can you believe they [do gendered stereotypes] and [do things I don’t like]??” mostly don’t hate their spouse, but it’s a way to maintain ingroup cohesion with their other straight same-gendered friends. I’m a [gender], you’re a [gender]. Our spouses are not a [gender], therefore they’re weird and alien and not like us. 

 It keeps everyone in the ingroup close (because they dislike the same thing) and keeps people from the outgroup out (because they like or are the thing you dislike).  I’m Like You, You’re Like Me. Those Other People, the ones who Do The Thing, they’re Not Like Us, so we’ll make fun of them.  It’s a form of bonding, like monkeys picking flies off each other. 

Conservative humour is making fun of liberal arts students who didn’t get a ‘real’ job, or Those People who sag their pants and talk funny, or people who are scared of guns, because they’re part of the outgroup, they’re Not Like Us. It’s making fun of “liberal hypocrisy” or a self-proclaimed feminist having a meltdown in public because liberals have to be crazy to believe the things they believe; they’re Not Like Us. It’s making fun of gay people and GNC people for doing gender “wrong”, because They’re Not Like Us. It’s making fun of literal fucking children for doing something ‘liberal’ their teacher or their parents roped them into, because They’re Not Like Us.  

It’s being deliberately mean for the sake of mean- or in the case of the meme-y part of the alt-right, being deliberately gross for the sake of gross- to bring the group together and keep other people out. 

Feminists and liberals “don’t have a sense of humour” because they’re not willing to indulge in the conservative kind of “funny” mean for the sake of mean. (Don’t get me wrong, there’s plenty of that on the lefty side of the fence- ‘male tears’, anyone?- but in general feminists are not fond of sexist/racist/homophobic humour, even if they’re normally part of what would otherwise be the conservative ingroup.) They’re willing to call that shit out, and usually the first thing they say is ‘that’s not funny’. 

“Liberals have no sense of humour” is code for “liberals are part of the outgroup.” “They’re not willing to believe that making fun of people like them is funny, therefore they’re Not Like Us. And that means we’ll make fun of them even more for it.” 

[oldchevyimpala79]

Hey, Dean. Jon here. Are you free any time soon? I know we haven’t caught up in ages. Been, well, busy, and I figured I shouldn’t pester you, what with everything going on. I never sent Riley a Christmas present, did I? I don’t know what she likes, so I bought four sticker guides. 

---

“Oh fuck, she’s going to be crazy with them. She’s on that phase to paint doodles all around. Last day I found her painting on the wall. So I don’t really know if it’s a great idea to give her stickers now. But I’m going to keep them for later”

@aestivetic

[actualwindsinger]

As you have a front-row seat to the two of them, what are your views of the relationship between the Earth Father and Flame Mother?

We are all really good friends and fighting partners back in the gooey ole days... They can make some pretty land together! Old Rocky doesn’t move around much but I bet he sends her Spreets! (Sprite Tweets)

[beadearie]

@jonathantylan Dr. Nicholas Rush was asked to look out for and recruit brilliant young minds for the Stargate project, and the first spot he looked was his students, they had always been so brilliant and eager to learn. One in particular had always stood out, hopefully Jon was still available to dedicate his life to space science.

[i-m-snek]

I thought I did research before I got my ball python. I talked to everybody I could find in the local reptile community, read up on reptile care online and off. But now my snake, Bud, has started to glass surf and bonk his head against the glass. He has two hides, a big wide water dish, warm and cool sides of the tank, a climbing stick that I move to keep interesting, and his humidity is kept at 65+, heat at 72-74 F. All I can get from advisers offline is that he's just dumb, nothing I can do.

Heat is waaay to low! You need a 90 degree hotspot and a 78 or so degree cool side :)