in light of the fantabulous news that half•alive is now signed to tyler joseph’s record label that i can barely find any information about, i made this:
absolutely pooping my pants over the wolf. it’s like top x backrooms x potentially anti ai commentary and i’m going feral
(This is a silly post inspired by our loud and gay-vior Blake Jennings, and yes I will make a skyrim version)
Henry - This entirely depends on the timeline. VH and SBO get it permanently, dare I say TCW Henry is homophobic. TK is the fruit basket, R would get his car tires slashed, you don't kill the gay icons of the game on camera and get the pass back, sorry babe
Charles - He openly and unapologetically bops his head to music, uses way too many thumbs ups, cannot say a three word long sentance without the word 'uhm', and is literally what my t-boy dumbass named myself after. He IS the word. He gets called it and treats it like a compliment because it is.
Ellie - Either I give her the pass or she rips it out of my cold dead hands: chaos bi queen either way.
Reginald - This is not a question of can Reginald say it? It's 'can the word say Reginald'?
RHM - Cowboy coded and violently pumped full of transgender angst. And shipped with Reginald, again- can the word say RHM?
Dmitri - No, and he knows that he shouldn't say it. We're all better off without it, including him.
Hubert - You see, I WOULD be inclined to say no for the same reasons as Dmitri. Unfortunately I must imprint my personal biases and definitely not my emotional issues and I am thus forced by the gods of 🚬 to tell you that Hubert Galeforce is a lesbian and if he cannot say it to the pearly gates he can say it to ME.
Burt Curtis - I feel like this man reads the most vile decrepit fanfiction without breaking a sweat, and you can't pull that off without questioning your labels at least a little. He can say it.
Sven Svennson - If he's gay with Burt, yes. Otherwise, no. Too much power otherwise, he would become a cult leader way too fast if the angsty ao3 t-boys got their hands on him. (It's me, I'm angsty ao3 t-boys)
Carol Cross - Try and stop her. Try and stop her. Go on. Try and stop her and she'll call you it while stepping on your neck.
Dr. Vinschpinsilstien - The same as Carol but infinitely more petty, in my head she acts exactly like GladOS with just a tinge more lesbian.
Rupert Price - Again I was initially inclined to say no until I remember who he gets shipped with, so it's the same case as Sven where he is not allowed until proven otherwise, then it can shout it from the ROOFTOPS, baby.
Dave Panpa - This man is me. This man is literally just me. And if I cannot say it, the word simply does not exist, he can say it. Now.. is he going to? No, probably not, he probably still says 'unalive' on Tumblr.
Drake Camper and Josh Taylor - These two are grouped together because in my mind they are the epitome of the boys in Year 10-11 who swear they are homophobic and then borderline make out during a maths lesson. So yes - in 5 years if they do it right, otherwise they haven't completed the obstacle course yet.
Quentin Alabaster - Yes for two reasons; one, he has to deal with the two I mentioned above and he gets an honorary pass for that, and two. I tortured this poor man so violently as a kid and at this point the pass is compensation for 10 year old me's actions. He could be the straightest man in the world and nobody would care.
