#julthoughts

[purpleluna]

01-02-23

I cannot believe that another year just passed by. Honestly, I don't even know how, but the past few months just flew by.

Being in a completely different country is so hard. I've met a lot of people but most of the time, they disappoint me. The people that were supposed to be my "friends" don't really care, and they just remember you when they need you. I'd rather be alone than hang out with those type of people. I want genuine people, I want to be friends with people who I can love, and care for. I miss my friends back home. I miss hanging out with people that really care about me. Just being yourself, and being happy.

Though it isn't easy, one thing I've learned about myself is how much of a strong woman I am. I know that I'll be able to get through all the curveballs I face. On the brightside, Karl will be here soon (about 2 years or more lol) to celebrate everything with me!

Leaving everything that hurt me in 2022. Cheers to a new year!

[purpleluna]

1-11-21

Recently, I keep on remembering the memories we had together and it hurts so much.. I remember all the happiness and love that we've shared together. I hope one day I'll be able to heal from all of this. I've never put my heart out like that to anyone that's why it's really hard to move on from all of this..

[purpleluna]

6/16

It's been a while since I found a song that will calm me down and clear my mind.

The song is called "no song without you" by HONNE. This song reminds me of all the good memories I had with the people I love the most.

"Oh, I'd be nothing without you

Oh, there'd be no song without you"

Without my friends and family, life would be much harder. I am always grateful for each and one of you.

[purpleluna]

5/24

I love you. But will my love be bigger than my fears?

You have broken the trust that I gave you and it is really hard to mend the pieces back together.

Though it may be exhausting, every day, I try to heal my heart through cleansing the negativities and forgetting the bad memories.

I am really trying my best to give this a shot. It may be a long journey of forgiveness, but we'll eventually arrive at the end of that road.

I just hope my love will win over my doubts and fears.

[purpleluna]

5/7

Is love ever enough?

Is it enough to forgive the person who caused you so much pain?

Is it enough to heal from everything they have done to you?

Will love ever be enough, ever?

[purpleluna]

4/29

Nothing hurts more than hearing the person you love the most lie.

They swore that they would never ever hurt you yet they chose to break your heart.

It will make you question your worth. "Was I not enough?" "Did I do something wrong?"

But, keep in mind that hurting you is their choice. Nothing can ever justify hurting somebody. Just think of it this way-- it happened because fate made its way to save you from that person. You are now free. Free from the worries and doubts that you have had for a long time. It may hurt today, but someday, your wounds will completely heal and you will be happy again.

[purpleluna]

Hello,

I hope you are doing well. Though we have already ended our relationship, I still could not get you off my mind. You know what's sad? Despite the unfortunate things you have done to me, I still love you with all my heart. But I guess, this is just part of the moving on stage.

I'm really sad that we have to go through this. It is really hard for me to let you go. 3 years. We have shared more than 3 years together. Though it ended just like that, I will always be grateful for all the memories and love that you have shared with me. I was genuinely happy during that period and I couldn't be more thankful.

I really don't know how I can get past this... I was so sure of you. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I wanted to build my future life with you. But you just chose to hurt me. So I am choosing to move forward.

I loved you so much, I gave you everything I could. But I guess, it will be never enough. Still, thank you. I've learned a lot from our relationship.

Here's to moving on and moving forward.

[purpleluna]

When you feel like everything is perfectly fine, it is not.

How do you tell yourself that everything will be okay, when apparently it will never be?

I guess this is how it’s supposed to be. Happiness will always be temporary, The feelings you have are unnecessary. I thought every single thing will be in place but as they say, nothing stays the same.

Even the people you love are not going to stay. People will come to your life just to teach you a lesson. Not everyone is meant to stay.

For all of the pain I have been through, I’ve become numb. I cannot feel a single thing. I’m so tired of e v e r y t h i n g.

Maybe it is what’s supposed to be– I can never be worthy of someone’s love, I can never be in successful relationships.

All I have to do is accept that fact. Maybe I should not look for love, love should look for me. I will wait for the right time. Maybe falling inlove at this time is a bad idea. More depressing, to be specific.

I hope you’ll find someone much better than me. I hope you’ll find someone who’ll make you happy. I hope you’ll find someone worthy of your love. I hope you’ll meet someone who has the same taste of music as you, someone who will always be there to listen to your rants, someone who can be strong for you when you’re feeling weak, and someone who will love you for who, and what you are.

I guess this is the end of the race, this is our finish line, and I am truly blessed to have met you.

I love you, and you will always have a special place in my heart. This is not the end, but only just the beginning for you. A fresh start. A new journey. You'll be fine without me. Believe me. You can do it. Keep going.

Always take care of yourself.

Jul