Misfit Menagerie AU incorrect quotes cause I’m bored (might draw some of these later)
Riley: On the count of three, what’s your favorite cake?
Riley & Ryker: One, two, three-
Riley & Ryker: Chocolate cake, peanut-butter frosting, and chocolate chunks!
Doey: Our turn, Bobby! One, two, three-
Bobby: I’ve never had cake before. What is cake?
Doey: I'm naturally funny because my life is a joke.
Riley: Snow got me feeling some type of way.
Doey: That's hypothermia.
Riley: Damn, the paramedics told me it was the magic of Christmas.
Ryker: Wake up! The sun is shining!
Riley: What do you want me to do, photosynthesis?
Ryker: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.
Doey, used to Ryker being dumb: Sure...
Ryker: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.
Ryker: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake.
Ryker: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio-
Doey: Jeez, that one is a little-
Bobby, interested: No, no, Ryker, keep going.
Bobby: Riley, I want a bedtime story!
Riley: I’m busy, Bobby. I’ll tell you one tomorrow.
Bobby: If you don’t tell me a story, I won’t go to bed!
Riley: Once upon a time, there was a kid named Bobby, who always wanted things their way. One day, their friends got sick of it and locked them in the basement for the rest of their life. Everyone else lived happily ever after. The end.
Bobby: I don’t like these stories with morals.
Riley: Is this a good idea?
Doey: Real life should have a search function, or something.
Riley: I am convinced Ryker and Bobby share a brain cell.
DogDay: And it's not in use very often, it seems.
Emma: I just wanna be called cute 21/7.
June: I love making parties more interesting by telling strangers “I want you to know that I personally have no problem with you being here.”
Bobby: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?
DogDay, in another room with Doey: Why can I hear screeching?
Ryker: The risk I took was calculated but, man, am I bad at math.
Doey, handing out popsicles: which flavor do you want?
Doey: uh you mean blue raspberry?
Bobby: blue flavor! Blue flavor!
Doey: Blue is not a flavor!
Riley: Bobby has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all they say now. Everything is deez nuts. They simply can't stop.
Riley: I asked Bobby where they learned that joke. They made me promise they wouldn't get in trouble if they told me. I agreed.
Riley: So they lean in and whisper, "deez nuts."
Riley: What if people had food names and food had people names?
Ryker: Hey, spaghetti, we’re having Riley for dinner.
DogDay: What is wrong with you people?
Bobby: Shut up, chocolate.
*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one*
DogDay: I will not let you down.
Kissy: *glares* (which means ‘No, I'm not.’)
Riley: Please god, I am so tired.
Bobby: Assert your dominance over your friends by kicking them in the face, and then giving them a little smooch on the forehead!
Riley: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.
Doey: Are they saying “friends”?
Ollie: I think they're being sarcastic.
Bobby: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Riley! All of your friends are in this room.
Bobby: That’s the longest worm I’ve ever seen.
Riley: DogDay… I’m bleeding…
DogDay: Oh god… what’s your blood type?!
DogDay: I’m trying to but you’re bleeding-
Ollie: Yeah, I’m a false prophet, but you believed me, so whose fault is it really that we’re in this mess?
Ryker: You ever get so tired that you start seeing spiders?
Ollie: Me after I take 17 Benadryl and start seeing the hat man.
Ollie: Oh is this not a safe space suddenly?
