Friendship
We accumulate friends in our life, people who complement our worlds.
I have a couple yet no human is perfect. Even i must acknowledge my faults, my missteps and my many flaws. I Diana, my darling reader, is not perfect nor do I ever try to pretend I am. After all we are all human.
My acquaintances and I have an unspoken understanding, we do not share ourselves with each other. That is how we manage to come and go in eachothers lives as we please. Keeping it light without expectations of much else.
My friendships are a bit more complicated, more of a trade off. We exchange what the other needs for what we desire. Its cold and rough but necessary all the same. They are the closest people to me, unfortunately it's all about give and take.
I'm not sure what a good friendship looks like but so far those aren't its qualifications. At least not in my mind. To me they have to be a different kind of exchange, a trade of joy and laughter. Trading tears and misfortunes throughout a long period of time. Where does one find those?
They say soulmates meet for they have the same hiding places. Is the same true when it comes to friendships? Do I simply hide in the places I love and expect to build a tribe? If you have the answer please let me know.
Maybe I am not in the right place to find a tribe. A group of people that help eachother grow into the best versions of yourselves. I must wonder where such a place is? I am tired of the endless roaming about, in search of people like me. Others who see the world like I do.
Loneliness is a terrible thing to feel, even when self love is what you hold. Alone is a terrible way to be, even when the world surrounds you. Here I am both lonely and alone.
Diana.