You don't know me
You don’t see me
The real me
And that’s okay
Because I don’t even wanna see myself
I hate looking at myself in the mirror
I hate my own presence
My own guts
Cause thats how they've made me feel
I see a failure
I see unsuccessful woman
I see uncaring mom
And I see uneducated daughter
I see a girl with no father beside her
& I see a girl with a mom that has no aim
And I am so disappointed at myself
Disgusted too, to be honest.
For being this way
Which I always wish to change,
But the circumstances didn’t let me
Be better than this,
Or choose good choices in life
And it’s all thanks to me I guess
I give up easy
I get tired so quick
I don't wanna deal with any bullshit
cause it's too overwhelming for me
&
For being stuck in this moment in time
With nothing
With just myself and my mistakes
That hunts me everyday
I don’t wanna love myself
Nor anybody
Cause I know I’ll just
Drag them into
My fucked up life
So I better be alone
And die alone.
I’m just a piss of shit anyways…
-C.M