Watching Karkat and Kanaya is like looking into a mirror that reflects your inner desires. Their interactions are steeped in familiarity, and the way Karkat reacts to Kanaya's touches makes your pumper ache for a similar bond with your own Vantas. They make it look so easy, so effortless.
"Do you think they're pale?"
Your Vantas regards your dancestors with an arched brow and a dismissive sniff.
"Quite possibly. Karkat appears to soften even if only marginally in her company. Meenah's told me she's spied them on piles on two separate occasions."
"Strange, isn't it? I wonder what circumstances brought them together." And why didn't it happen with us? The unspoken words scald your tongue as you stew in your unrequited feelings.
Kankri's well aware of your pale crush, and though you wouldn't dream of overstepping boundaries his insensitivity frequently engenders contention.
They hurt because for whatever reason you care about the imperious brat. The two of you mix just as well as oil and water, constantly butting horns over clashing ideologies. But really, you do your part: you listen to him. You don't agree, but you listen.
Kankri, on the other hand, only listens so that he can interject with his own oftentimes overly subversive opinions.
At times you've been so fired up by him that you believed you could wax pitch for Kankri. Your patience with him, however, far outweighs your irritation.
Maybe you're too soft on him. It's hard to discern just where the line should be drawn as it blurs somewhere between confidante and would-be-quadrant-mate.
Your attention is looped and wrangled by the obnoxious bellowing of your friends; Mituna's got the floor and he's using it to regale anyone who will listen with his latest sexcapade with Latula.
"SO I CHARGED MY GUNS AND I BLASTED HER UNTIL SHE WENT INTO BERSERK MODE--"
Teen drama in general runs rampant among your flock so you're wholly unfazed by the crude, unfiltered exposition.
"WRECKED HER SO GOOD NO AMOUNT OF REZZING IS GONNA BRING HER BACK HAHAHA. DID YOU HEAR HER SCREAM OR DID YOU GO DEAF FROM THE SEEEXXUAL SONIC BOOM??"
Cronus looks about ready to knock Mituna's block off, but you're far more concerned with Kankri who is looking decidedly poignant, his face shifting through an array of emotions before inevitably hitting a wall within himself. Anger rises within his reddening cheeks and tightens his jaw, but before you can sweep in and remove him from the situation he has fled the scene.
Your pumper lurches in sympathy.
Maybe you're soft on him because you understand what it's like to have a dead-end crush.
Unable to resist your urge to attend to him, you follow him into the next room where he is preoccupied with trying to level his breathing.
"Kanny... what's wrong?" Cautiously you approach, brush your hand over his back and wait as he takes deep, composing breaths.
"How is it acceptable for him to talk about her like that?" His voice wavers as he speaks, his breath hitches and he's clearly frazzled. You wait out his distress, calm and forbearing, knowing how hard this must be for him. His crush on Latula confuses him, but the fact that she is soundly spoken for only complicates matters--not to mention his own celibate pact which you're pretty sure he clings to that much more fervidly since Latula and Mituna.
"If i were lucky enough to share a bond like that with her I would treat her how she deserves." He pauses, considering the floor, before continuing in a low, dejected tone. "Of course even if she would reconsider Mituna I doubt I would even cross her mind." There's that anger again turned inward like a knife to his gut.
Frowning, you snatch your forlorn friend by the shoulders and whirl him around, the sudden move wrenching his eyes up to yours--right where they belong.
"Kanny, don't you dare depreciate yourself. You are an amazing troll. Yes, you're a bit difficult and your personality can be hard to swallow, but that just makes you worth that much more to those who are willing to get to know you. Your attentiveness is enviable, your intelligence is refreshing, and when you take a break from social advocacy you're overwhelmingly charming... and might I even say sweet?"
"Oh flatter me more." The usually stodgy troll is smiling--a testament to everything you see in him that so few are lucky enough to witness.
"Anyone would be lucky to have you in their quadrants."
Kankri's lips twist into a smirk, his sadness falling behind him. "Don't get any ideas, Porrim."
You mirror his smirk and lean down, baring your fangs at his smug face.
"But you're just so pitiable, you petulant wiggler."
He's blushing now (a sight you take full responsibility for), but it's not long before he huffs, righteous indignation restored.
"Celibacy, Porrim." He fires back through gritted teeth, looks both ways and inclines toward you to plant a kiss on your cheek and pull you down for a quick but tight hug,
"Pale-block," you coo into his hair. You'll take what you can get.
the belief that porrim has slept with everyone except kankri makes me really happy because if you wanted to insert sexual tension between them it would be so easy
kankri's inflexible vow versus porrim's sexual liberty makes for such core opposition between them that although they are pale (one-sidedly?) they could just as easily be black for one another
they disagree so heavily on so many fundamental matters that it makes for endless antipathy
2: Cheek Kiss
Smooch. "Porrim stop it." SMOOCH. "Porrim, stop it." Smooooooch. "Porrim stop it right now!" Kankri is in the heat of a controversial reblog war with some fellow bubblr users and he simply cannot be distracted. He has a voice that needs to be heard, minds that need to be changed! Porrim hanging over him assaulting him with kisses alternating between cheeks is not only unwelcome but deleterious to his concentration.
But they both know he's too passive to do anything about it but moan and groan until finally he pushes back from his desk, whirls around in his chair and chastises her for so rudely disrupting him.
"Kanny, those people on the internet will always be there, and none of them have a hot moirail like you do." She plants a wet one on his cheek and he flails.
5: Firm Kiss
Sometimes they just can't stand each other; he is a blowhard and she is a feminist and they constantly clash because Kankri cannot for the (non) life of him keep his mouth shut.
But sometimes these scuffles take a pitch turn and Kankri lands himself against the wall pinned by the voluptuous troll, their mouths locked, tongues roving. They kiss like they debate, hard and impassioned--both with a point to prove.
