I'm ftm and I'm wanting to change my middle name (with my first name) cause its my grandmothers name and it sounds off. But my grandmothers dead and I don't know if that morally ok, we weren't close but my mother is already stricken enough that I'm 'killing her daughter' that this may be like the last nail in the coffin for my mother ever coming around to me being trans so I'm having a dilemma
there are other ways to honor your grandmother! my dead name is derivative of my granddad’s last name and there were ways to tweak it if i had chosen to keep it.Â
i understand the concern for your mother’s feelings and all that, but there is a point where your life and your decisions for yourself become more important. you should come first in situations like this and maybe it’s time for your mother to accept her son. it may take some time, but like, idk. i wish you luck with your name!

















