#khutulan

[00stupid]

Thank you to those of you who joined in the HoloLive session, even though I cried a lot it meant so much to me that all of you showed up and shared that experience with me!! Big shoutout to like apparently MY ENTIRE EXTENDED FAMILY FOLLOWING THIS BLOG LOL it was so so good to meet you guys and have your support!! We have so much to talk about, and thank you Dad and Pops for inviting them to the stream!

Okay. For those of you who couldn't hop live or get on the holo groupcall later after everything was said and done.....I got my approval for LL2. I met her. It happened. My whole crew ended up in the hanger to come meet her and support me, it was so nice of them and meant the world to me. I streamed the whole thing on a 360HD Eye floater, (the link is at the top of my HoloLive pins) but I forgot about it like as soon as the glass went clear on her crate. I used the key and all the smoky blackness faded from in panels in front of her frame, and there she was.

She....she's so beautiful, guys. Khutulan is an ancient Atlas, one of the originals from the first generation of Sparri homeworlders. Her helm is topped with a trophy tail and she's got the coolest scarf, I wonder which pilot grabbed it for her? She's got all the oldschool classic contours and paneling, but she shines like the day she was born. I've never seen any kind of machine maintained like this before, you can tell it's like all by hand? I don't even think drones could get in that deep to the pitting of the mechanical locklanes. Not back then, at least. I knew right then that every pilot she chose treasured her trust, and made sure to take perfect care of her. I get to do the same thing, and I'm ready.

Uh it did take me a minute to figure out how to get in though. Since she's only like two feet taller than I am it's not like there was a cockpit and I may have panicked a little lol. Shinsei finally helped me out, we had to hand Khutulan the key and her hand moved to take it from me. When she had it, her panel locks dropped and she folded apart at fifty different invisible seams. It was like watching origami in reverse, and all of a sudden there was a me-shaped space to step into so she could wrap back over me.

A lot of you are gearheads like me, so I guess you guys know what came next. For the rest of you, CW: needles.

So the really special thing about this moment for me, personally, was becoming a part of Khutulan for real. Atlas AIs are different, they're memories and parts and pieces of all the the previous pilots that have ever partnered with her. I knew that when I stepped in, I was about to get stabbed with hundreds of microneedles all over me, and I was a little scared. But it's how she gets to know you, and how I was going to be able to join the rest of the pilots in her memories. Plus I have done dumber stuff that hurt more haha so I did it anyways. She closed up and there was a weird electric pinch all over the needle sites, and for a second it felt like...I don't really know. I felt like a huge crowd of people were all looking out of my eyes at the same time. I can't describe it. It wasn't bad, but it happens every time she goes online now and it's a lot.

I felt her form wrap and slack with mine, and she was a perfect fit in less than a second. My display came up, and instead of feeling like I was looking through a screen, I felt like it was my eyes but better. The HUD kicked in and layered out, I felt the rig power up, and then I heard her voice for the first time. She called me by name and told me I was her 348th pilot.

It felt really weird to cry in a helm, but I just couldn't help it. She was everything I had ever dreamed of, I felt her with me in ways I have never experienced before. Like we were both walking in eachother's bodies, and the AI was AMAZING <3 If I had a single thought about doing something with her, all of a sudden I was flooded with rapidfire memories of how the other pilots did it so they could help me out. It was SO WEIRD but also really sick, it's going to take a while to get used to.

A lot of you dm'd to ask what I did after I turned off the Eye, I just....like. Wanted a moment with her alone. I wanted to share her with EVERYONE and make sure everyone appreciated her and was as happy as I was, but I just needed a moment with her to myself. Idk. It was really special. She's perfect. I'm so happy. I know I told you guys a lot of this during our group call later on, but I'm still happy. I don't think I'll ever feel unhappy again tbh?? HOW COULD I? SHE'S HERE, SHE CHOSE ME. SHE PICKED ME, I AM KHUTULAN'S 348TH PILOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[00stupid]

SSC.LL1

So I was almost at Hypnos Port when Dad and Pops called. I got online and was super excited to see them. We mostly just talked about their new vessel and my latest mission, they were really happy to hear everything about my Lancer work. They are really proud of me and always wanna hear about my races and stuff, but they’re like THRILLED to have a Lancer pilot in the family. Anyways, they told me they had a present at Hypnos waiting for me and I just kinda...like. Felt something in me. I knew what it was, and I think they knew I knew bc Pops started crying. But Dad and I held in here and I said I’d call them when I got in so we can open it together. They told me to take the other little present they gave me before I left too, and when I picked up the little bundle, it felt right. Like the weight in my hand felt good. Well that was the first thing I did, I RAN to go pick up the mail. It’s not like we can get mail to the ship lol, so Ports contact pilots and let them know when they have stuff waiting for pickup. I had a lot of stuff I wanted to send to my dads anyways so it was a good cover for why I booked it. Idk why I didn’t want anyone with me. I usually take Anu. but yeah I signed off for everything under my name and this HUGE crate gets loaded into the bay. I kinda hung back until everyone else was off the ship, then called dads again and got started opening everything up. The little one way a key. A super crazy old key, like I didn’t even think it would work anymore. It was built with like actually groove ports and old contact alloy and everything, but it was so NEW for being so old. Like it had been treasured and taken really good care of for a really long time. Dad and Pops told me that it had been in our family this whole time, waiting for me. The key opened the big crate, and it was like a big dark coffin and a vending machine? Like panes of smoked dark glass layered over eachother and they key turned one of the panes clear so I could see…..ancient weapons tech. My tech. MY girl was waiting for me, just beyond the next layer of glass, when I would pick up LL2. Idk I was totally overwhelmed and excited, we celebrated together and they told me all about the old stories they had heard and they want me to make more. I’m SO EXCITED TO MAKE MORE LEGENDS, and someday soon I can finally meet her. Khutulan. 

[kimludcom]

The Badass Granddaughter of Genghis Khan

[00stupid]

what made you become a lancer pilot

OH!! I love this one- so racing was cool, I know a lot of you wanted me to keep racing. I loooved racing, especially that bit I did on the gravity slingracer circuit off the Cradle proper. I know it's like kind of dangerous but you really can't get the same feeling anywhere else. Going really fast and being in the moment makes me feel really zen. but it was kind of a stepping stone on purpose, I never intended to be a racer forever. It was like....pilot training? To make sure I was cut out for it. So my dads have always talked about Lancer pilots and how cool they are, they were kind of like my superheroes growing up! So were Dad and Pops, don't get me wrong, but we're Sparri so they always brought it back to our family history as Lancers. We're one of the families who cleared the planet for settlement way back when, like the original Atlas pilots of the homeworld! Actually on both sides, too. I always thought it would be so cool to keep the story going, and I'm really really good at operating machines and thinking on my feet. I thought I had a decent shot at being a Lancer, and my dads helped me out how they could. They let me drive maintenance mechs all the time, got me in touch with a few pilots they knew for tips, and bought me holosims to give me a pilot POV. It's just kind of been my dream forever :) Also. So, I wanted to be a Lancer no matter what. That was already a done deal, but when I started getting old enough to test into the program and scoring race titles, Dad and Pop told me about Khutulan. She's everything to me, she's my goal. She's been in the family forever, and she hasn't chosen a pilot in like...way longer than any of the other ones our family had. They showed me old holos of her in action and I just knew immediately that she'd be the one for me. I wanted to earn her trust and be her man <3 I'm closer every day. I just know we're gonna be together forever, someday.