Shit I write at mignight and probably will draw if I have the time: The First Council: Reality Show Edition
Interviever: Master Voryn, what are your thoughts on the First Council?
Voryn: My sweet Nerevar is the only good one. He is my sweetest Moon and Star, my beloved, my champion, Azura's most specialest boy who deserves Nirn, a kiss on the cheek, the forehead and a cookie. No more questions.
Interviewer: What about Almalexia?
Voryn: Do not get me started, I respect the grind, the powermoves, the girlboss moments, but taking my Moon and Star? My Sweet Nerevar? Honey you don't even want your mer, don't be greedy. Also the nerve of coming to my House and insult my glam, the only overly dramatic, extra, over compensating thing here are those pauldrons of her, big enough to shelter all of Vvanderfell.
Interviewer: And what about Vivec?
Voryn: That kid's possessed. Azura help him or Boethia take him, Mephala have mercy on him, I don't like him, bad vibes all around, who enters a room and begins talking about how each corner opens a portal to a pocket realm of light beings that demand a kiss for the end of times? I tell you who: Vivec. I don't even want to know what that means.
Voryn: Weird, the most tolerable but I don't trust him. Always staring, nodding, taking notes, never says a word and when he does it depresses me all day. He has murder in his eyes and not in the fun way. Spends all day building machines with clocks, why clocks anyways? Has a cog collection too, found him once at 3 in the morning putting fish on his bread next to scrib jelly and downing it with sujamma.
Interviever: ...Is there someone you like?
Voryn: ... Alandro is fine.
Interviewer: And about the Dwemer?
Voryn: Kagrenac's gangrene sounding name and Dumac's inhability to see the guarshit that goes on in his domain—