Send me ♡ + a word, and I’ll write a headcanon / ACCEPTING / @kinklelegacy
Much like every aspect of Eddie's life, he does it his own way, and masculinity is no exception. Obviously, he does not buy into the typical type of masculinity like the jocks etc. He hates playing and watching sports and playing the tough guy, and despite fandom's love of projecting Eddie, the mechanic, onto the world. I don't think he cares about cars that much, personally. His van is about getting him from A to B, his band to gigs, and to drug deals when necessary. I think he knows a decent amount about cars----but it's not a passion for him.
I suppose you COULD say there is considered femininity to Eddie by Hawkin's and 'normal' standards, but that comes with contexts!! Eddie, at least my version of him, paints his nails, wears eyeliner and dons a few piercings, which is considered in the 80s and sadly still now, though not as much, very much a woman's thing. But Eddie is a metalhead, and that's pretty typical attire for metalheads; the Duffers are just pussy bitches. BUT the aesthetic of POPULAR metalhead style, appearance and culture largely began with the band Judas Priest, of whom the lead singer is gay gay gay. Of course, no one knew that at the time! But Rob Halford, the singer of JP. Created that particular look after witnessing it in gay bars and gay BDSM clubs etc, and it boomed within the metal scene. The metal scene was unknowingly influenced by gay culture for a long time, much to Rob's amusement. And if you know anything about the metal scene of the 80s and beyond, it's not particularly queer or feminine friendly, the opposite. So, that aspect of Eddie would not be seen as feminine in his own circle. But outside of it? Hell yeah. It would be seen as weird and girly. But Eddie has always grinned and bore his differences to the 'normal' guys of Hawkins, much to his own personal detriment. Because he'd rather be himself and face the unkind consequences than pretend to be someone he isn't. So, whether wearing make-up and jewellery is seen as feminine or not. Eddie doesn't really care, you know? He wears it because he wants to. If someone were to ask him why he's dressed like 'a girl' he'd be likely to shrug and say it's metal; it's just part of the culture. Get with it. I don't think it will get him until some years later maybe he just likes doing it outside of being a metalhead too.
Appearances aside, there's then the personality aspect. Eddie is a solid metalhead, no doubt. But he obviously doesn't prescribe to the typical personality of one. Yeah, he's got that working-class anger. But what working class person doesn't have that? But he certainly doesn't come off as an angry meathead. He's obviously the opposite of the typical metalhead stereotype. He's sweet and kind and looks after people. He's a soft lad. And that would have gone against a lot of what masculinity was considered to be at that time. America is still experiencing the aftermath of the Vietnam war, and they've got Reagen in power. Toxic masculinity is everywhere. To Eddie, being a metalhead is largely about living your truth, living your way, and doing everything how you want it. It's hardcore to live like that in a world that actively opposes it.
Do I think Eddie could have turned out to be a toxic meathead? ABSOLUTELY. The mould for it is right there with his abusive parents and a father who forced him into crime from a young age. It would have been extremely easy for Eddie to have been someone else. And I think his saving grace is obviously uncle Wayne. I think Wayne saved Eddie from turning out like his brother (I hc Eddie's dad is Wayne's brother). We see Eddie being particularly polite and chivalrous towards Nancy and Chrissy. And you can say he simply got that from reading too much fantasy fiction about knights etc. But, I choose to believe this is something that Wayne taught him because Wayne is about the only decent fella in the Munson family, and he wanted Eddie to grow up treating women much better than his brother did his wife before she killed herself. And, well, Wayne is a bit of an old-fashioned fella too, holds doors open for ladies, offers to escort them to their cars when it's dark, and do 'tough' manual labour for them. And he's poured all of that into Eddie too. So, depending on what kind of woman you are. Eddie would make a really great boyfriend and husband.
Furthermore, I came to another conclusion that Eddie has learned a lot about gender and femininity/masculinity from reading non-conformist literature, academic and fictional. In small-town Indiana, I think reading is more or less the only way he could have found certain things out aside from visiting bars etc, in bigger cities. He would have read feminist and queer literature that would take him further from the hegemony of 80s America. Until he's pretty much at a point of not caring about many labels. Women can dress, act and do whatever they want, just like a dude can. He actively supports that and champions female friends and girlfriends. So, while Eddie does take a chivalrous attitude with women. It’s just to be a decent person. As for gender and sexuality, that's something he's had to experience for himself, and it's not been great in small-town Indiana (not until Steve.) But given all he would have learned from teaching himself and hearing other stories, Eddie is very comfortable with his sexuality and his gender as a man in general and as a man who has sex with other men. Being fucked by another dude is nothing to do with masculinity. He thinks it's pretty metal to get fucked in the ass tbqh. And he's more than aware of how terrifying it is to be anything different in a place like Hawkin's, but he does it all the same because it's his one life, and his parents ruined enough of it already. No one else is going to tell him how to exist.
So, in a long-winded and roundabout way. What I've wanted to get at is that Eddie isn't a typical dude of his time and dominant culture. He's one of the people that the dominant hegemony actively fears because he causes disruptions to their way of ruling; heterosexual reproduction and the expansion of capitalism linked to heterosexual reproduction. That's why people in Hawkin's are scared of him. The government actively pushes controlled normalcy, and Eddie ain't it. He's the freak. He's not a man; he's something else. A something else that needs to disappear from American society and not be encouraged further. But he's refused to be quiet and be what people want him to be. It's honestly pretty gnarly that he's managed to make this of himself in a place like Hawkins during the 80s. No doubt that other people in rl managed it too, but he's a great shining example.