#kittensxandxalchemy

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

HEY DOG BOY! Don't fucking tell little kids what that fucking can't fucking say they have just as much fucking right to say whatever the fuck they want than everyone else. Now, I require a good scotch, single malt, aged 10 years.

"HEY SCREWS-FOR-BRAINS! I'll fuckin' tell the fuckin' brat kids what they fuckin' can or can't say as long as they live under this fuckin' roof. So shut your fuckin' pie hole before I break this goddamn bottle in half and jam one end'a it over your eye like a fuckin' killer-ass monocle." 

[ aggressively shoves drink at you ]

"Chug it and gag." 

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

Bring it dog boy. Lets see if you throw as well as you fetch.

"... I'm gonna carve your lungs out, fill'm with trash from the back alley an' force feed'm to ya." 

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

[AGGRESSIVELY HISSES AT LIKE A CAT]

"I may not be able t'walk over there, but I can still throw this thing, you little shit." 

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

[Throws bone at] Fetch.

[ growls after the bone because Amelia has him sitting for the time being ]

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

I fucking love cats

"Okay, cool."

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

"This wouldn't be payback for me kicking you in the face would it? But no, I don;t do well with pain."

"Fine. Do whatever. I really don't have energy for this fuckery right now."

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

"Would you uhh, like me to turn it into a bone? Because, I kind it as a skull. I mean, it looks cool."

"Can I just punch you really hard in the skull, instead?"

[dolcetters-archive-blog]

"Hey uhhhhh. Whatever you do, don't look at the sword in your room. Because I totally didn't turn it into a skull club on accident."

"--you did WHAT?!"