#korusalka

[thebibliosphere]

Is it possible that the wrong bra measurements might contribute to back pain? I'm sure that muscle conditions are enough to deal with as is, but I remember that the majority of people don't know their right measurements, and that surely wouldn't help if you're already in back/rib pain

Oh yeah, absolutely. I would think too tight a fit might be more detrimental, but also wearing something too big that doesn’t give you any support would also be painful, I’d imagine.

[thealogie]

We know that The Americans is homophobic because it's a refined textbook example of queer relationships except they're all straight as far as we can tell. (Six seasons of seducing targets & learning their deepest secrets and not ONE of them was gay? unrealistic)

Please do me a solid and rate the gay energies of the mains on this show so we can know where we were truly robbed

@korusalka Thank you for this perfect ask that only you and I and perhaps two other people will be able to understand. (Warning for spoilers.)

Elizabeth Jennings: we gotta start with our main duo here and I gotta say that Elizabeth’s behavior from the beginning to the finale screams of closeted internalized homophobia lesbian behavior. would I make her a kinsey 6 on this version of the show? no because she loves Philip and their love drives me insane. But would I assign her a kinsey 6 on a version of the show without period typical homophobia where she’s undercover with a wife in the US instead and everything else is the same? Would I assign her a kinsey 6 in the version of the show I sometimes watch in my head where Philip is unacknowlegedly a trans lesbian? Yes. This woman is simply a lesbian going on a crusade because she’s not allowed to realize she’s gay. In the good version of THIS show however, we would’ve seen her seduce one woman mark for a mission. she goes into it cold and “acting” as always and we see through keri’s facial acting how disarmed and pleasantly surprised she is by the tenderness as things get going and she ends up having an amazing orgasm she did NOT expect. She goes home shaken by how real it was. She is cold and distant when Philip tries to comfort her. This is never mentioned in the show again.

Philip Jennings: see above. Philip Jennings exhibits so many lesbian behaviors that I’m almost ready to just assign him lesbian. but let’s take a step back into reality and not just go for the lesbians AU version of the show: This man would have been comfortably and openly bisexual had he not been fucked up by the KGB. He’d have absolutely no problem with it. He should’ve been dating state department guys on the show tbh, which would send Elizabeth on all sorts of new jealousy spirals like “fuck I was jealous of Martha and now I have to compete with state department twinks??”

Martha: controversially? I believe this to be a straight woman. I mean no one is 100% straight. Martha definitely “experimented” in college and one time she and Clark would have a threesome because Marta wants to spice things up and Clark notices that perhaps Martha seems like she is enjoying making out with this woman in the threesome aaaaa lot. But anyway, she really is genuinely fairly straight. She simply puts up with Clark’s drug dealer boyfriend behavior in a way that is “please please straight girl let me help you want better!”

Stan: same as Elizabeth except replace the Soviet style communism with American conservatism as the force that’s keeping him from even considering that he’s 100% gay. This is a man whose drama is fueled by not realizing he’s a kinsey 6. The failed marriage? The desire to do undercover work? The dedication to his work and his brotherhood-dominated workplace? The avenging his partner complex? The way he is with Philip? All of this drama could have been avoided if stan kissed a boy. He’s never thought about it. Good version of the show we see him checking out Philip in the showers once without meaning to and getting turned on and crying in his car about it, banging his head on the steering wheel. It is never mentioned again.

Nina: cool bisexual for sure. in the good version of the show she’s actually shopping for cool music to send back to her gf and that’s how her whole drama starts and it makes stan’s blackmail that much worse. not to bring an “orange is the new black” vibe to this but in the good version of the show she also later has a tender and brief romance in prison with an older woman who’s in there for doing Cool Journalism. They’re terrified and they cling to each other

Oleg: a gay ally. He’s been to gay clubs in DuPont circle with his gay American friends and is “charmed by the culture.” When Nina comes clean to him about the “I had a gf” aspect of her story, he simply says “oh. I love Freddie Mercury.”

Gabriel: His tragic backstory is that he was in unrequited love with an agent he was managing and the agent died on the job and Gabriel has been blaming himself for it for over a decade and everything he does is motivated by that.

Claudia: she’s straight and homophobic and offended by how universally people just assume she’s a lesbian. In the “gay people exist” version of the show Gabriel tries to commiserate with her about his gay backstory and she’s like “there is no homosexuality in the USSR! I am not gay!” There are several clues dropped to us, the audience, that she is another closeted gay but this is never fully explored or confirmed

Paige: I wasn’t gonna include the kids but it’s really important to note that a bunch of my friends in high school got into that exact brand of cool Christianity (the evangelizers literally used Sufjan Stevens to lure them in). They are all lesbians now including two who thought they were cishet men at the time. This girl is on a clear trajectory

[bybdolan]

.... ok jetzt muss ich wissen, was so alles deine Meltdown-Songs sind

Der inoffizielle Titel dieser Playlist ist “Lieder, die mich auf Familienfeiern jedes Mal in eine emotionale Krise stürzen”

Ohne Dich (Schlaf ich heut’ Nacht nicht ein) - Münchner Freiheit

Für immer und dich - Rio Reiser

1000 und 1 Nacht - Klaus Lage Band

Dein ist mein ganzes Herz - Heinz-Rudolf Kunze

Für mich soll’s rote Rosen regnen - Hildegard Knef

Ich war noch niemals in New York - Udo Jürgens*

Griechischer Wein - Udo Jürgens*

Major Tom - Peter Schlling

Du trägst keine Liebe in dir - Echt

Freiheit - Marius Müller-Westernhagen

*Udo Jürgens wrote some of the most heartbreaking songs about the feeling of hopelessness in post-war Germany and germans were like “Yea, that slaps!”

[wellsjahasghost]

Seeing you falling back in love with Bellarke and falling for Shirbert for the first time is so refreshing but it also hurts and AWAE not getting a fourth season after that kiss is a hate crime

oh a big mood! i actually was okay with the series end being with that kiss (gaaah that kiss!!!! but you’re right the college days could’ve been a serve) but ka’kwet being left behind in the residential school breaks my heart.

[bieddiediaz]

Missed the memo that Shahid Kapoor is an asshole! Could you update me please??

- married a barely-college-graduate 13 years younger than him- his wife's family actually thought the marriage proposal shahid's family extended was on behalf of shahid's younger brother because the age difference between shahid and his to-be wife was too much- .................and yet- 'fell in love' with his wife after she became pregnant- kabir singh.- defended his character in kabir singh, saying he 'had anger management issues' and 'was not misogynistic'- apparently got nostalgic while playing kabir singh, which,,,,,,, major red flag- 'the graph of love in aranged marriages is better'- made one of his exes go vegetarian for him, and then maintained that he had 'changed her for the better'- said the fact that his wife 'conceived so early brought [he and his wife] together faster'- [allegedly] flew into a jealous rage when he found his wife at home with a male friend and assaulted the man- [allegedly] has cheated on his wife multiple times- is generally super insecure and jealous and dominating and it shows in his relationships with women and costars

[italianwlw]

I'm making a so far secret playlist for my lesbian friend's birthday that's exclusively about oral sex because she likes to make pussy jokes all the time and I want to give her like 3 hours worth of pussy jokes. Since she also started to learn Italian and loves it I wondered whether there are any Italian songs that are about oral but at least from a woman's perspective because the playlist should focus on women. I know, that sounds very niche. Can you help me out?

When I started reading this I really had no clue where it was going but I totally loved where it went :D That being said, I honestly can’t think of anything... we don’t have many female singers, nor many sexual songs, and those two things combined are a real rarity. I would really like to help, but no song comes to mind :/

[windsweptlassie]

I'm living for your blog description damn 👏👏👏

oh my goodness, thank you! i call that lil section “describing myself in the most pretentious and eccentric way possible”

[catty-words]

∞

ooh, nice, the first song to come up is “madison” by orla gartland, which gives me the opportunity to shoutout mic the snare, one of my favorite youtube channels and the reason i know the album this song comes from exists!

favorite lyric: can i be your sister or your daughter / or your houseplant in the corner?

it captures the dark humor of the song really well, as well as the 'am i obsessed with this girl because i love her or because i want to be her?' vibes