So given your expertise on both NHIE and CXGF I’d be curious to hear your take on comparing the narrative framing of romance/love triangles in each. I know this is a big question so only if you feel like it/have time.
I feel like CXGF earned their solo Rebecca ending and NHIE has earned a Benvi ending because of the way each show framed the protagonist’s approach to romance and whether it’s inhibiting or enabling their agency.
Do you feel like this is true or do you think NHIE could go either way and I’m only remembering CXGF this way because I have the context of s4?
I think this makes a fitting ask to cap-off my unusual flurry of activity this afternoon. I love the way your asks so often read like standardized test essay prompts. I did the reading, and I can prove it!!
the reason I watched Never Have I Ever was actually because of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. my dear friend from the Crazy Ex fandom watched nhie before I did and was tender toward the ways in which the first season paralleled early Crazy Ex. Paxton Hall-Yoshida and Josh Chan share a lot of DNA.
of course, while parallels are fun to draw, I never find them fulfilling textual analysis in and of themselves. the shows are about two very different things, after all, and only use a similar narrative jumping off point to accomplish the exploration of their themes. we shouldn't hold that against them in perpetuity.
so what, exactly, are these shows trying to accomplish? well, Crazy Ex is concerned first and foremost with society's framing of romantic love. I used to think it only cared about the messaging on the feminine side of the coin - i.e. finding and settling down with a romantic partner is the end all, be all of fulfillment - but I've only recently come to appreciate the way the text explored the masculine side of things, too, especially when it came to both Greg and Nathaniel. for men, when you find a woman you want to commit to, it becomes her job to sort through your emotional damage and make you a better provider.
the love triangle, then, is a reflection of these compatible yet equally awful expectations. Rebecca's fixation on Josh is a displacement of the fulfillment she actually felt being engaged with community theater. nailing him down as her romantic partner becomes her one goal in life, where unlocking her self-actualization as an adult actually comes from committing the songs in her head to paper.
meanwhile, Greg (and later, Nathaniel) needs to sort through deep-seated unhappiness but uses Rebecca's attention as a work-around.
the function of the love triangle(s) in Crazy Ex is to distract everyone from their personal fulfillment specifically as commentary on pop culture's obsession with romantic love as an end point.
on the other hand, Never Have I Ever is a coming of age story, specifically an Indian-American coming of age story and specifically about the loss of innocence that naturally results from the death of a parent. Devi's journey to adulthood is very often framed in the text as a balancing act between things that seem diametrically opposed. Being Indian and being American. Being her mother's daughter and being her father's daughter. Being cool and being true to herself. Being with Paxton and being with Ben.
one of the main tools of cognitive behavioral therapy - as I understand it - is teaching one to hold two disparate concepts as being true at the same time, and one of the main concerns of the immigrant experience - as I understand it - is learning that one doesn't have to be perfect at everything to deserve taking up space.
tension between different paths is the crux of nhie and, as a result, of nhie's love triangle.
in conclusion, the fact that Rebecca disengaged from her love triangle is the most fulfilling end point of her narrative because it was all about unlearning the harmful scripts about romantic love dictated by society. the fact that Devi picks a path - and, I'd argue, the path that was often about embracing hard truths about the world and herself - serves her narrative because it was about growing up & the way committing to one thing doesn't negate all other potential identities.
that said, I wouldn't have hated Devi ending up without a romantic partner at the end because she's young and deserves the opportunity to self-actualize unburdened by anyone's - but especially a romantic partner's - expectations for her. but that's me bringing the context of Crazy Ex to Devi's story which, as I highlighted, isn't always the best way to engage with a text that's trying to say something on its own merits.
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