It is wrong. We weren’t supposed to start like this. This is not who I am and it’s not what I do but yet day by day and night by night I find myself returning to you. I find myself going against what I know is the right thing to do. I find myself throwing it all away just so I could spend an extra moment with you. There’s so many questions I want to ask, there’s so many things I want to find out but I know it’ll hurt you to say them so I kept them hidden and let them hurt me instead. The number of times when you catch me staring into the faraway places and asked me what I was thinking. I said nothing, but we both knew it was a lie. You didn’t want to probe and I didn’t want to tell. It worked for us. But at the end of it it doesn’t change the fact that I’m the other girl. And it’s something I never wanted myself to be or see myself being. Yet it’s happening.
I want love to be simple. I want love to be courageous. I want love to be the long meandering river and I want love to be the roots deeply entwined.
I should never be a deciding factor of what you should do. Instead, in choices of relationship, you need to know what you want and what makes you happy and if you are someone who is okay with the boring love of someone you can live with or you want a love that consumes you with someone you can’t live without.
And when you decide that have the courage to do and go after what you want.
Love is simple, love is kind, love is so beautiful. But it is us, we complicate everything and we make loving hurts. But that's not what love should be like. Love is and always will be. That's how it is.
