Referral Madness
Anytime I mention my grandfather’s name, Clarence O. Kuester, Jr., inevitably, the very next words I hear are “Oh, I loved your grandfather”. Even my best friend Tonto, who doesn’t really like old people, loved my grandfather.
That’s saying something.
There is no question, Clarence Kuester, Jr. was a spectacular gentleman, who was adored by literally everyone. He was charming, intelligent, well dressed and wise. He always gave the most extraordinary advice with a soft and soothing voice. It’s difficult to describe my grandfather’s voice. He had a slight southern drawl with just a hint of British dialect. The only voice that seems to come close to his would be ‘Winnie the Pooh’. Which may sound funny, but it’s true.
When my sister, the eldest grandchild, was born my elegant grandfather wanted his grandchildren to call him “GRANDFATHER”. It has a ring of sophistication and aristocracy. It’s well suited for a man of his taste.
The only problem was, my sister couldn’t manage the mouthful and when she would attempt “Grandfather”, the only thing that came out was, “Fädder”. To his credit, Clarence didn’t give up. He would sit with Ashley and get close to her face repeating, “GRAAAND FAAATHER”, over and over.
It was no use. From 1971 until the day he died, he was our Fädder.
What he didn’t realize at the time, was my sister had given him a gift. The word Fädder translated from Norwegian means Mentor. A fädder, by baptism in Norwegian society is also called God's grandfather or “godfather”. A Fädder is a person who has a special responsibility to take care of another.
Being one of eight Kuester grandchildren was one of the best childhoods you could have imagined. I think it’s safe to speak for the other seven when I say, we were all extremely close. We were more like (and still are more like) siblings. While not one of us is surprised by how respected and loved our grandfather was throughout his life. There is a level of awe to which it holds.
When I was working in the film industry scouting for homes in the Charlotte area, inevitably, I would knock on the door of a longtime Charlottean who might have been hesitant to listen to my “Hollywood” sales pitch. All it took for me to gain their trust was to ask them if they knew “Clarence Kuester”? and two minutes later I’d be having tea chatting about where the cameras would be set up and making plans to shoot a movie inside their home.
Over the years, I’ve learned that what other people think of you is out of your control to a large degree. In the end, people will draw their own opinions of you based on their own perceptions. Ultimately, it is of little consequence. Still, it would be nice to be held in such regard.
The goal is to be referred. The goal is to have others hear your name and immediately think of you as the person to call to help solve whatever concern they may have.
I like to think of myself as a solid problem solver. When I worked in the film industry they called me “The Fixer”, because anytime there was an issue with the neighbors or something had to be accomplished quickly, they knew I would fix the situation.
Since becoming a real estate agent, I’ve had to figure out how to get people to think of me as a real estate agent. The objective moving forward is to have my name be the first to come to mind when my friends, family and acquaintances hear someone has real estate needs.
Perhaps the reason they don’t is because I have had my fair share of careers; TV associate producer, restaurant manager, event planner, location manager, photographer. It’s not their fault they can’t keep track of what I’m doing. Well, today that’s gonna stop. In 1936, an anti-drug propaganda film was released called ‘Reefer Madness’. It’s completely over the top and hilarious. We had a copy of it on VHS when I was in college at Appalachian State. The other day I was thinking about how to get more referrals, and for some reason that movie poster popped in my head, and I felt the need to create this for your enjoyment, and for your referrals!
