Hi guys! You've probably noticed I've been a bit absent again these last weeks. If you follow me on Instagram (where I've been more active lately and have been posting updates of my life), you'll know what's been happening. For those who don't, here's the summary: I've been painting the house and moving, so I had a couple busy weeks.
I was hoping to start the year in a great way, with renewed energy after all that 2018 was. In the end, I could overcome all the problems last year threw at me, so I had decided it had been a good year after all.
That is, until half an hour before midnight.
I moved back to my mom's house, but our terrain is big so we have two houses in it, one in the front and one in the backyard, where I'm living now. There's a door that separates the backyard from the rest of the house, a door we always kept closed at all times because my mom had a dog that liked to chase (and kill) cats, and I had two cats, as some of you might remember. But for reasons I can't understand, that door was left open while we had dinner waiting for 2019 to start. I was asked to bring something from my house at around 23:30, and on my way home, I found one of my cats lying near my door. She was limp, still just a tiny bit warm, and I took her in my arms and moved her and checked for her breathing, trying to get her to meow or move or do anything to show me there was still a chance to rush to the vet and save her. My mom had to stop me cause I couldn't understand she was gone.
I have no words to tell you guys how devastated I feel. I still can't believe my baby is gone, that I had to bury her yesterday and that I won't see her anymore, that she won't be around to lick my arms and meow at me to climb onto my lap, and flop onto her back to ask for belly rubs, and she won't sleep by my head anymore and won't be there when I wake up. I miss her so much I can't stop crying.
My year ended and started in the worst way possible, and to make it worse, guess what? Today is my birthday. January 2nd.
So, again, I'm gonna be needing some time to get over this enough to get back to producing art. I'm sorry if I don't answer your asks and messages right away. I hope you can understand why. And I hope everyone's had a better start of the year than I did.