#kyle being kyle

[indomie-fried-noodle]

[castawxayaway]

our unexpected life: p2

​part 2 of 3, hope you enjoy and if so please let me know as feedback is always brill. 

as I’ve said a lot in my posts after sunday I am not writing til July, but I do have a mini masterlist/collection put together for the meantime. I’ll be active, but not writing as exams come first :)

enjoy!

p1 (cause this’ll make little sense) / p3

Well, we went for coffee. We continued to meet at the same place over the course of a few weeks, some days he had more ginger toned stubble, other times he had a shadow instead. His eyes didn't remain consistent, I remember one day they were clouded like the storm brewing outside. Other days they were full of life as I smiled his way.

​The two of us spent the time learning about each other, I learnt he is in a band, they're pretty well known and he's off until the next leg of tour. I remember how he worded it, the corner of his mouth lifting, embedding into the two day old stubble. "I'm wandering to places I don't normally go." I leaned in, resting my elbows up and focusing on him.

​His actions mirrored mine as he was inches away, never having been so close I noticed a few faint wrinkles by his eyes. How sunken the bags were getting beneath his pure feather blue eyes, the light glint from cars passing in them rimmed with thick eyelashes as he blinked from the glare. He wasn't the type I'd met nor come across, instead of being filled with quick remarks about my sexuality he had wit, an actual sense of humour.

​It had reached the point where we were slowly outgrowing the niceties of the small loving smell of freshly grounded coffee beans, we needed an expansion past the duck egg blue walls. He suggested somewhere perhaps a bit further, where we hadn't memorised the names of every drink and concoction available on the menu. So, as he suggested we did. One afternoon we ate tapas and drank a cocktail, the next we sat where we first met. Neither of us truly settling in on one space.

Three months in, roughly 91 days together we decided it’d be time to not keep it such a secret and instead a marginal one. Lying on my bed I couldn’t help but fidget, sure I’d mentioned to my parents about a guy I liked but besides that, nothing. We agreed to have dinner whilst my Mum wouldn’t stop hounding me for information, I told her about him, but not his age, or his career. As six o’clock neared closer and closer the more empty my stomach felt and filled itself with worry of the unknown, the inevitable even. Taking a deep breath I could feel waves of fear wash through my body, circulating from my thoughts to my heart, passing by like oxygen through my veins. 

Hearing the doorbell sound I rushed down the stairs, nearly tripping on the last step as my parents hung back. As I opened it I was greeted with a reassuring smile along with an attempt to dress smartly, meaning he wore black jeans as always but wore a suit shirt. Holding his hands behind his back he wore nerves thick in his eyes and we just stood there, reflecting the same look as my parents neared the door. 

I remember it entirely, the sort of surprised smile and noise my Mum made. Dan struggled to fathom words and revealed a bunch of tulips instead to my Mum, muttering something that no one heard. We all walked inside and already the tension was there, the uncomfortable looks my parents exchanged. It took us the entire evening (and a few glasses of wine) to get comfortable, we all laughed and thankfully accepted Dan as my boyfriend. My Mum always said she wanted what was best for me as she giddily asked Dan to play, to which he politely declined. Whereas my Dad was thankful I found someone, that ‘he never thought the day would come’ always good to know. 

Knowing we were both in the clear - just I was invited to his place in London. I won’t lie, the impending fear loomed over us but as soon as I walked through the door it felt comfortable, it felt right. The two of us walked around for a bit, as if it were some show room, albeit a messy and scattered with instruments show room but after an hour or so it became less like a hotel room and somewhere to relax, similar to being at the cafe on a Thursday afternoon. 

I began to wander around in one of his shirts, the mix of mint and aftershave intertwined into the cotton I wore which always brought a smile to my face. In the room next to his I saw a keyboard, much like his old beloved one yet this didn’t have the infamous white letters across it, instead it remained plain, untouched. Moving to sit behind it I place a few chords, ones I vaguely remembered from my year of piano in Year 5 when I was an overly ambitious child. 

Not aware of his presence I gained confidence, my fingers blended into the keys as I played. Smiling to myself I saw someone above my gaze, lifting my head he just watched me in awe. Flustered I pulled on his shirt that I wore, unsure what to say. He walked over towards me, full of intent and sat next to me on the dusty bed. His eyes laced with passion, the sort of love I’d never witnessed. That was when he told me, the first time someone had ever told me those three words I’d secretly dreamt to hear; ‘I love you.’ 

Little was known of his friends, the band mates he had as neither of us felt ready to, it was becoming an elephant in the room, slowly but surely suffocating both of us. That was until I was asleep in bed, Dan downstairs working and a few voices could be heard. Sitting upright I could feel my heart in my throat, my first thought was ‘this is how I’ll die, in my mickey mouse pjs’ but no, I am living to tell the tale- though I wish I died rather than having to face them there and then. 

I could hear Dan’s voice, he was doing the stuttering nervous thing again, the same one he did when he met my parents. Quickly I threw some jeans on and a cardigan, the stairs began to creak so I beat them to the door before they’d intrude. A rather tall man stood before me, hiding his mouth amongst his thick brown beard. “Well shit me.” He muttered as I stood there, my attempts to sizing up against him useless. 

“Nice to meet you, guessing you’re one of Dan’s band mates?” I raised an eyebrow to him, not playing the kid role but the adult move, considering I am technically an adult. 

He laughed lightly as I stood there, unable to comprehend it all. Looking back on it he reams nothing but apologies, but hey times change. His eyes locked with mine, unable to shift. A few steps and heavy breaths followed behind the bearded one, and three others stood looking at me as if I were a zoo animal. “I’ll be damned.” Someone spoke up and behind them I could see Dan’s socks, unmistakable. 

“You guys got a good look?” I remember how sarcastic I was, the defensive side is not always the best first impression. With my hands on my hips I imagined I must’ve appeared as a 5 year old with a temper tantrum. 

“Are you sure this is legal?” One with brown hair and similar look to Dan piped up whilst the other two remained quiet. “I mean, girls got a mickey mouse top on.” He pointed out and sighing I knew in that moment I’d rather be murdered. 

It took a while for them to let Dan through, who continued to be uncomfortable leaving me to explain it all. None of them really understood, in fact the bearded one couldn’t stop making jokes and remarks. “Just wake up from a nap?” The remarks only continued as I walked down the stairs away from them for a cup of tea. 

As I poured a cup of tea I heard Dan talking on the stairs, something about me. Intrigued I walked over, listening in. “I really really like her. It doesn’t matter guys.” Smiling I felt my heart flutter, and drown out his quiet tone. “Just please, go easy on her.” 

Moving away from the stairs I continued to make tea as the creaking on the stairs decreased until I felt the presence behind me. Each of them awkwardly introduced themselves as Dan stood like a proud Dad, and I a teacher on the first day of class. After a bit of awkward conversation they all began to leave, Dan showing them out. Left behind from the bunch was the broader of them all, Will. “Listen, I’m sorry about them. If you two are happy then that’s what matters. I’m here if you need me.” With a light touch on my arm I nodded, he too following them out. 

Dan came back, standing a fair distance away from me scratching the back of his neck. “Well,” He exhaled loudly. “that could’ve got worse.” 

[bounddragonkyle]

What are 7 insecurities you have?

I’m a dragon.  

I don’t think you understand the species, Anon.