Labyrinth
I often struggle to review films that have been in the cultural landscape for decades, but for my friend Julie - one of my earliest and most enthusiastic Patrons - I'm giving it the old college try. What hot take could I possibly have on a movie most people my age have burned into their subconscious as a root to their sexuality and/or their introduction to the world of doms and subs (and no, I’m not talking champagne or sandwiches here)? The benefit I have is the gift of time and distance - it has been at least 7 or 8 years since I’ve seen Labyrinth, and it’s been more like 15 since I’ve seen it stone cold sober. We all know the story - a young teen girl named Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) wishes the Goblin King (David Bowie) would take away her toddler brother because he’s being annoying AF by crying during a thunderstorm and the Goblin King shows up and is like “I got this” and Sarah’s like “JK JK NEVERMIND” and the Goblin King is like “Too late, finders keepers, if you want him back you gotta make it through this huge labyrinth.” Pretty standard stuff. And it’s a Jim Henson project starring David Bowie that was made in the 80s, so the threshold for...let’s say eccentricity? is pretty damn high already. So - is it really that weird, or is that my adult mind projecting things on a kid’s movie that aren’t really there? Well...











