@rhaenysconqueror Exactly. And that happiness is once again emphasised at Viserys's birth. Frankly, people just refuse to accept that: 1) th
yup. if you look objectively at the events, it’s obvious. when they reunite after his exile, rhaenyra is not mentioned with harwin/laenor again. she stopped all pretenses. at the same time, daemon allegedly brings his niece into his marriage/bed. or they’re close enough, feelings obvious enough, that it’s what aided such rumors. they’re inseparable once more despite having partners (laena is the only one included, who also has a great relationship with rhaenyra), and don’t let this stop them. (reminds me of the hotd “marriage is a duty” theme daemon was teaching rhaenyra in season 1). daemon was pursuing and romancing rhaenyra during both his first 2 marriages, really trying to make her his rhaenys. then at the start of 120 AC, laena, laenor, and harwin all die off so quickly and suspiciously the year is nicknamed “the year of the red spring”, where “tensions and jealousies come to a boil”. grrm also let us know aegon was born literally 9 months after laena died. they had no reason to rush this timeline of events. it was bad for them politically to rush it, but that’s because it was motivated emotionally and not politically.
daemon’s marriages with laena and rhaenyra actually unfold similarly. after his wife dies, he kills a romantic rival and elopes with them, prompting viserys’ rage. it is the circumstances that make the difference.
for rhaenyra, daemon’s life was the most stable it’d ever been. he was in such good standing that viserys was finally considering him for his new hand after lyonel strong died. daemon had his daughters and family, finally had another real chance to be with rhaenyra, their claims were already tied through their children so there would be no real new political advantage with this match. or at least not any that would benefit them anytime soon to justify the rush. the only explanation is that rhaenyra immediately got pregnant. they either did not care to take serious precautions, or were too caught up within each other and slipped. daemon was risking everything he worked so hard for. again, they could have taken precautions, quietly been together like they had already been doing to respect the mourning periods of their spouses, and go about this in a much less suspicious way so daemon isn’t a suspect for every crime.
but despite his current standing in his life, he still arranged for laenor, his family, to be killed by his own lover. rhaenys, his cousin, and corlys, his closest ally’s heir and only remaining child, all while they’re still grieving laena. this situation is very dark and tragic. this was not motivated by politics. this was so daemon could finally be with the one woman he was ever denied, who he had long waited for and wanted to marry. he wasn’t going to make the same mistake as last time. daemon also had to relinquish total control over such a risky act by paying qarl to do if, which is another gamble on his part. if he was caught, he’d be destroying and betraying his closest allies and family. he’d certainly be executed this time.
for laena, daemon was in his worst exile and point in his life. for laena’s hand, he quickly killed a weakling, a “wastrel” who lost all power/money/status and was only an embarrassment to corlys. he was someone who no one would miss. daemon already struck the deal with corlys in private. this was the perfect solution for both men’s problems, and daemon had a guaranteed outcome. here, he literally had everything to gain and nothing to lose. it had such low stakes, he had his fun with it. this wasn’t an emotionally driven act, this was political.
daemon elopes with both rhaenyra and laena, but with laena, he had made a public spectacle of asking for her hand, which was willingly given by her father, and they took 2 weeks to organize a wedding with laena’s family present. it was only a secret/“elopement” from his brother and the crown. daemon and rhaenyra truly eloped on dragonstone, the seat of their ancestors, their home, paralleling them to jaehaerys and alysanne. the wedding they’ve so long waited for in the most meaningful place.
viserys was also enraged by both marriages. it prompted daemon to go to essos with laena for viserys to cool off, even though all he wanted was to go home. after he wed rhaenyra, daemon very happily remained on dragonstone with almost everything he ever wanted for nigh on a decade. he was finally fulfilled.
also, daemon prioritized naming his firstborn after his father, but he took laena into consideration for their second twin’s name. rhaenyra had zero autonomy to name any her first 3 sons— it was corlys and laenor who fought over it. she finally gets this autonomy when she weds daemon and chooses the names of all their children. she excitedly named aegon after the conqueror (could also be for daemon’s deceased young brother), and it was to spite alicent. with daemon’s much emphasized, long yearned for first son. the naming of all the children is deliberately contrasted in the text.
these differences are all so obvious if you take a deeper look into the context and motivations, rather than hanging onto flimsy unreliable quotes.
no one at dragonstone betrayed their secrets for the 10 years they lived there, so we have no sources giving us insight on the peaceful side of their marriage, which was the majority of it. people claim he didn’t have any peace with her because of the war at the very end, but this was after 9+ years together. he was the most settled he’d ever been at that time. they had a tight-knit, loving blended family. they subverted alicent/viserys. they stayed on dragonstone and raised a huge family, daemon “ever by her side”, still having children a decade later — what about that screams that he was using her for politics?